Am I still expecting him to leave again? Absolutely. But am I holding that over his head or allowing it to impact my behavior? Absolutely not.
I know this is going to take time, sweet time. And lots of hard work. Some days? I want to throw in the towel: why delay the inevitable? That's what I ask myself.
This is exactly what I'm feeling. It's kind of scary, taking this risk but I am so happy to have the chance. And the story about your H looking for a rental... I had my heart in my throat. I was so glad at how it turned out!
M:54, H:55 T:33, M:27 12/13 BD: EA 01/14 BD: PA, H leaves 03/14 H & OW break up 05/14 H says he will file for D 08/14 H initiates D 09/14 H wants to R 12/14 Still bungling our way through R
I know from my own personal experience with having pieced and lost a couple of times it is the fear itself that helped create some of the circumstances leading to the next walk out. I don't thing us LBSs can stop the fear but we must find ways to not let it be the focus and we must never let that fear define our actions, determine moods, or make decisions.
I say this not because I have come anywhere near being able to practice it in my own life, but because of the damage it has done.
Nitty and Train I am so happy for both you guys.
Me 47 - W 35 M 9 - T 10 2 Daughters - 7 & 9 Discovery of EA- 8/4/14 S - 8/5/15 D mentioned - 9/11/14 R & Piecing - 3/17/15 Regard one another as more important than yourselves. - Philippians 2:3
And as long as the good Lord's willing and the creek don't rise, I'll be sitting around a table with my mom, my brother and his family, my sister and her children and my husband and all our babies - including my "baby" who is growing a baby in her womb - later today.
And I feel I owe a debt of gratitude to this site - and especially to my dear Starsky and HS and Wonka - for me being able to feel so abundantly blessed on this Thanksgiving.
Thank you all for being such an important, supportive, empowering part of my year. And for helping me guide my family back together so we can spend another Thanksgiving together.
I hope you all are blessed 10-fold for it ... and I hope you are surrounded by love, light, warmth and blessings today.
I'll never, ever forget to be thankful for y'all.
Happy Thanksgiving!
M: 40 H: 44 Married 14 years S11 & D6; D20 & D19 from previous M 2BDs/PAs, 8 years apart Piecing: April 2014
Aw, nice to see everyone here cares for each other. I was always sceptic about stupid boards/forums but this one is providing my sanity and good support. Thanks from my side. I know already I will check in here for a very long time still to give something back and make a difference in my and others people lives!
Me 32 (German) Wife 28 T 3yrs M 2yrs Moved to US for W No kids BD 6/2014 In house separation Confirmed EA 1/2015 (ongoing since BD) OM not ready Real D talk started 1/27/15
I know you're going through an awful lot, buddy, but I'm worried about you over here.
You okay??
Oh my dear Train, you are so sweet to ask about me. I'm okay. I'm up in New Jersey, with my entire extended family to say goodbye to and to bury my father-in-law on Thursday. Yesterday was a straight-thru 17 1/2 hour drive up and a 1:00am arrival. Today was spent picking out their burial plot, a headstone, and meeting with the funeral director to go over all of the arrangements for tomorrow and Friday.
My poor 93 year old mother-in-law is just lost. "He took my best friend!" she wailed last Wednesday when God finally took him home peacefully after 32 days in the hospital.
The family is leaning on each other, as it should be. I am grateful to be here to support the fetching Mrs. Starsky. She posted the sweetest thing to me about an hour ago on FB: "A real woman can do it all by herself; a real man won't let her," with a little shout out to me. :o)
My heart feels about 50 lbs. after reading that, Starsky.
But I am so thankful you guys are together and can grieve together and support one another and celebrate FIL's life. God bless your grieving MIL. What a tribute to your FIL for his wife - at 93 - to still call him her best friend. And what an inspiration to us all.
May God love on y'all extra much this week, brother.
And Complex, ditto!
M: 40 H: 44 Married 14 years S11 & D6; D20 & D19 from previous M 2BDs/PAs, 8 years apart Piecing: April 2014
Oh, Starsky. I am sorry to hear you family is in pain and grieving. My prayers go out to you and yours, my friend.
Me 47 - W 35 M 9 - T 10 2 Daughters - 7 & 9 Discovery of EA- 8/4/14 S - 8/5/15 D mentioned - 9/11/14 R & Piecing - 3/17/15 Regard one another as more important than yourselves. - Philippians 2:3
