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A Message from Michele
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Re: Am I on the right track? (3) [Re: Wonka] #2512002
11/29/14 07:48 PM
11/29/14 07:48 PM
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 316
W
wmwb123 Offline OP
Member
wmwb123  Offline OP
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W
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 316
Yep. I've delayed and stalled the best I could, by there's not a lot left I can do. My L says we can probably delay until next year.


M 16 T 17
W moved in w/ AP (OW) 5/14
ILYBNIL 5/14
A discovered 6/14
D papers served via USPS 8/14
Filed my response 9/14
D final 5/15...
Re: Am I on the right track? (3) [Re: wmwb123] #2512004
11/29/14 07:49 PM
11/29/14 07:49 PM
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 316
W
wmwb123 Offline OP
Member
wmwb123  Offline OP
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W
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 316
I've read that divorce itself puts pressure on affairs, so who knows, maybe I can have a story like Crimson.


M 16 T 17
W moved in w/ AP (OW) 5/14
ILYBNIL 5/14
A discovered 6/14
D papers served via USPS 8/14
Filed my response 9/14
D final 5/15...
Re: Am I on the right track? (3) [Re: wmwb123] #2512005
11/29/14 07:51 PM
11/29/14 07:51 PM
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 7,319
W
Wonka Offline
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Wonka  Offline
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W
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 7,319
Originally Posted By: wmwb123
I've read that divorce itself puts pressure on affairs, so who knows, maybe I can have a story like Crimson.


I like how you're trying to make lemonade with the lemons you've been handed by W and how you think! Yeah..Crimson is quite a story, isn't he?

Re: Am I on the right track? (3) [Re: Wonka] #2512058
11/29/14 10:32 PM
11/29/14 10:32 PM
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,174
Mid-Atlantic, USA
G
GoatGal Offline
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GoatGal  Offline
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G
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,174
Mid-Atlantic, USA
Wm, Wonka,

It's hard to believe that in some places, one can get a divorce in 60 days like it's trading in your car.

That is no time at all for people to think things through, and personally I think a timeline like that is very destructive for families, and children who pay the price of decisions that are often made in haste, and for all the worst reasons.


Sorry for you wm...

-(G)GGG


Me 54 Him 63
M 23 T 29
0 Kids
Funny Farm of Rescues
12/12 OW--
5/13 ILYBINILWY: A denied
9/13 Proof OW: ENDED
2/14 Got D papers on my BD
I kicked him out for my sanity
9/14 He wants to "talk"?



Re: Am I on the right track? (3) [Re: GoatGal] #2512061
11/29/14 10:46 PM
11/29/14 10:46 PM
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 1,886
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Georgiabelle Offline
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Georgiabelle  Offline
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G
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 1,886
Wonka and GGG,

And 30 days in some states. The return policy for some stores is longer than that. Yikes!


Me-42 xh-41
3 kids
BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. )
Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style
D final 9-9-14
"Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
Re: Am I on the right track? (3) [Re: Georgiabelle] #2512065
11/29/14 10:54 PM
11/29/14 10:54 PM
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 316
W
wmwb123 Offline OP
Member
wmwb123  Offline OP
Member
W
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 316
Thank you, GG and GB for the supportive words. I'm not ready to give up yet. I think I'm beginning to detach, so I've got a second wind.


M 16 T 17
W moved in w/ AP (OW) 5/14
ILYBNIL 5/14
A discovered 6/14
D papers served via USPS 8/14
Filed my response 9/14
D final 5/15...
Re: Am I on the right track? (3) [Re: wmwb123] #2512148
11/30/14 03:26 AM
11/30/14 03:26 AM
Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,102
Dallas, TX
J
Jefe Offline
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Jefe  Offline
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J
Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,102
Dallas, TX
Good! I'm glad to hear that.


Me 47 - W 35
M 9 - T 10
2 Daughters - 7 & 9
Discovery of EA- 8/4/14
S - 8/5/15
D mentioned - 9/11/14
R & Piecing - 3/17/15
Regard one another as more important than yourselves.
- Philippians 2:3
Re: Am I on the right track? (3) [Re: Jefe] #2517498
12/15/14 07:31 PM
12/15/14 07:31 PM
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 316
W
wmwb123 Offline OP
Member
wmwb123  Offline OP
Member
W
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 316
My wife came to get her things this past weekend. She has now officially moved out.

Yet there was a development. Before she left she apologized to me. She said when I told her co-workers about her affair, they told her I was crazy, unstable and possibly dangerous. She said she believed them and so she has been treating me poorly ever since. She said now she realizes I've "always been a nice person." She even said she understood why I did it. She even cried a little.

Right after she left I found a postcard for her in the mailbox. I took a picture and sent it to her via text. She replied almost immediately, the first time she's responded to a text in five months. There have been several friendly texts since then.

I'm encouraged that she is showing signs of rational thought. Thinking I was crazy is irrational. Realizing that I am and always have been a nice person is rational. I had hoped, however, that the rational thought would return all at once and she would realize how irrational her affair is.

What do I do now? Do I attempt to reestablish communication? My DB coach had been working with me on that until she cut off contact. With divorce looming, though, should I really let her think we'll just be friends after the divorce?

It feels so good to have friendly contact with her, but I do not want my wife as a friend. I want her to be my wife.


M 16 T 17
W moved in w/ AP (OW) 5/14
ILYBNIL 5/14
A discovered 6/14
D papers served via USPS 8/14
Filed my response 9/14
D final 5/15...
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Moderated by  Virginia 

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