Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
It was suggested to me to read your posts for guidance. It has taken a few months but I have read through your entire story now. You have become a role model and inspiration to me. I can relate to so many feelings and emotions you have gone through. You also help to give me an insight to my H possible feelings. He is very different than your H, he is a man of few words! Mysterious, quiet, shy.... It's what I fell in love with but infuriating through this situation! But your experience has been an amazing one and I am so happy for your family. I truly believe in marriage and believe you should fight for it. You are one strong woman, more so than I can ever hope to be.
Thank you for sharing your story with us. I believe my H and I are finding our way back to each other and I thank you for part of that. Your story gives me hope, guidance, new perspectives, ideas.... Just overall therapy! I wish you the best and look forward to more updates.
Me 48 H 46 S 11 M 2004 BD 8/13 H moved out 2/15 -live in the present, enjoy the beauty around and within you, explore your new future-
Raine I just want to echo what everyone here has said- you are truly amazing! I was also directed to your threads and they helped me so much. I am re-reading many now as I find I get more and more out of them as my sitch evolves. I am so happy for you and your H!!
And this: He said, "It was always you, Raine." Oh it made my heart melt- I thought I was in a romance novel! But I can also see that behavior in my H- asking my opinion, sharing, coming running when I had a blood pressure scare.....
Thanks for being so compassionate and willing to share where you are now and your conversations with H. It really helps us all to see the good in our aliens
Me 41 H 40 M 20 T 23 S 19,16, 8 D 13 BD1 dec 2012 not sure going to work BD2 sep 2013 seeking a D Filed oct 2013, D Feb 2015 Life is about daring greatly, about being in the arena- Brene Brown
I'm so glad that my story has helped so many of you and you can find yourself relating. That's what helped me get through this too, being able to find a forum with people who I could relate to and people who could understand me. The toughest part of the whole thing is that you can't talk to anyone about it. Not only do you fear judgement of you, your children, and your spouse, but no one gets it either. You can't explain it. No one gets it unless they're in it.
BTW, I told H about the sentiment here of my story being read like a romance novel. That made me smile. H's response was, "Uh, really?" He was a bit embarrassed to say the least. I told him not to worry about it. It has nothing to do with him. I'm just a really good writer. Hah!
I get it though. I remember rH talking about kissing her husband again, for the first time, and my heart melted for her too.
I really hope all of you have that same experience, and I believe if you're here and you're putting in the effort...you really will. It just may not be how you expect it or how you at this moment you hope it will be. It will be exactly what you want at the moment it happens.
M38,H39 M:16Y BD:8/12 OWDB:11/12 S:11/12-5/13 "Temp" home:6/13 OW dropped:9/13 "I love you":12/13 H ring on:2/14 Depression back:5/15 "I'm done:" 7/15 H moved out: 3/16 H moved back: 12/16 Working on us: 3/17
me too- thanks for sharing. i'm hoping for something good - someday . (In a very very holding back and not expecting anything - kind of way tho.) Tired of holding self in check always- oh well huh? still hanging with my dbing stfu-ing & acting as if. will see in end huh?
with you 100% - as far as a not-talking kind of guy. i'd kill for a positive & clear word . oh well huh???
Hi Guys! I hope everyone is doing well and that you all have an amazing Thanksgiving.
Quick update....
Life is perfect. Perfect with all it's imperfections that make it so fresh and real and just great to be. I'm happy, H is happy, the family is all doing well. H and I spend a lot of time together and enjoy sharing in each others interests. Our marriage is better than ever. As time goes on, it surprises me that nothing has stopped. Nothing has plateaued. Everything just keeps getting better and better. The romance, the private moments, the intimate bond and security that comes from being with someone who knows me so completely and knows things about me no one else does, and I him. Sex is beyond amazing. Sorry. I had to say it.
Everything has just fallen into place in every aspect of our lives. There have been some really great things happening career wise and recognition wise. It's so great to be part of a team and that H and I are both behind the other one, cheering each other one and happy for each other. It's wonderful to have my best friend sharing it all with me. We are making some bold moves and it is great to be the age we are, yet able to do it and really have it all.
I feel bad that I don't update like I wanted to and thought I would. It feels like this part of my life that is connected here is so distant and unfamiliar that it's no longer a part of me. I don't think about it, don't talk about it. It is just something that I've accepted and am free to move on from.
This process is an amazing gift. It is the most difficult thing I have ever been through and I have no desire to seek out anything that could top it. But I would do it all over again to become the person I am now, in the marriage that I have now, married to the person H is now.
This is the greatest gift you could ever give yourself, no matter the marital outcome. Don't quit. Push yourself to keep going. You are worth it!
M38,H39 M:16Y BD:8/12 OWDB:11/12 S:11/12-5/13 "Temp" home:6/13 OW dropped:9/13 "I love you":12/13 H ring on:2/14 Depression back:5/15 "I'm done:" 7/15 H moved out: 3/16 H moved back: 12/16 Working on us: 3/17
Raine, I'm very happy to read your update. You are an inspiration to all who read your postings. I wouldn't expect you to return here and report updates often as you are working on your marriage and that's far more important right now.
Congratulations and Happy Thanksgiving!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
