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2BHappy Offline OP
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I did when I first noticed ...I said oh I see you removed some of the clothes great thanks did you need me to take them to goodwill

H said no

After that I keep wondering where the clothes went?

About leaving...
H has not brought it up on his own ever...it has always been in response to my questions or emotions or blowups...
Well once after BD he let me know that he was thinking about leaving... and he acted on that by getting a PO Box.

Each time after has been mostly worded like "if you want me to leave" " it seems like you would be better off if I left' " if you will be happier I will leave"
"If it harder for me to be here I can leave" "do you want me to leave" "

H has never mentioned D to me I've brought it up but not H.

Anger , H has not shown hardly any anger, we have both cried I have shown a lot of anger. When I force H responds with sadness and confusion then " I don't know what I want "I don't know what to do" " I guess I need to figure it out...think about it" " do you want me to leave"

Its like he wants to avoid/ignore US. And he sometimes acts surprise when I bring this all up?


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
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job Offline
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I think you've married my xh's twin! Never heard a word about leaving until something would create emotional highs. He really doesn't know what he wants.

Hang in there! They will surely test your patience.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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2BHappy Offline OP
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Job,

How did your M finally end? Since your XH avoided like my H does?

I just feel like as long I don't rock the boat my H will continue living like this for a very very long time.

If you dont mind me asking?

Do you have link to your threads?


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 28,295
Likes: 112
job Offline
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How did my marriage end? When he saw that I wasn't going to continue to play the power game w/him, after 2 years, he soon got off the pot and filed. He divorced me. I had made up my mind after he left the second time that it was over and I wasn't going to take him back even if he dropped golden eggs every day. The damage was too great and I had had enough. I cut my losses very, very early on. It was a huge relief to finally know that I didn't have to look over my shoulder every day and wonder when the next missive would come my way from the lawyer's office or deal w/his nasty emails and phone calls. Do I regret my decision, not one bit.

You have to remember, I came to the board in January of 2000. My postings were most likely scrubbed many years ago.

Last edited by job; 11/21/14 06:10 PM.
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2BHappy Offline OP
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Thanks for sharing. I hope it was OK to ask.

My H...he is very laid back...he could live like this for years.


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 28,295
Likes: 112
job Offline
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It was more than okay to ask. My xh was very laid back too until the crisis hit.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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2BHappy Offline OP
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Just wanted to drop in and tell everyone HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

You know what kinda puzzles me, IF someone would look into my home they might not think anything was wrong with my M? Especially if they looked in today...my H went out of his way to play a board game with s14 and I. Made sure we had everything family needed for thanksgiving dinner, made sure Stepsons were eating dinner with me and S14 and my family on my mom's side.

Then went out of way to spend alone time with ME before he went to work....

My H has not been a angry MLC/WAH THANK GOD, but today he was extra!

It could be the holidays but H has never been into the holidays, not sure why today felt sooooo different, but I know this could just be an UP day on H roller coaster and since I no longer ride his roller coaster, I'm just taking it as a good day!!!

Happy Thanksgiving, I will be thankful for what I have, because GOD has provided all I need and many of my wants.


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 813
2
2BHappy Offline OP
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Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 813
H was extra nice today


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 1,922
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2 B,

Glad you've had a great day. Hope you have a nice holiday:-)



3 kids
BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. )
Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style
D final 9-9-14
"Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
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2BHappy Offline OP
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Thank You Geoegiabelle,

I enjoyed the hoildays even though I ended up SICK with and my blood pressure was a lil high which it has never been!! EVER Dr said it could be becuase I was sick...I will have it checked again once Im all better.

This is another reason to make this about being a better me!! I have to lose this extra weight and let this stress GO! I will not allow this messed up situation make me unhealthy and affect my health, I will STOP the stress eating, will do my best to limit the stress I sometimes feels due to my H and sometimes my s14 and my mom. I will smile more, laugh often and BE HAPPY

I will find/create more GAL's. I will be more active!!!

I will be more positive in my interactions with my family and friends.


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
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