I'm very glad to hear that your mother is improving. Her memory may be impaired for quite some time, but w/family and loving care around her, she may recover more of her memory than what the doctors hope for.
I'm also glad to see that your h is being supportive and is checking on you. Do whatever you need to do to relieve the stress. At least he was joking w/you and definitely enjoy the relaxed communication.
Here's hoping that you'll be able to move your mom back to TX in a few days and she continues to recover nicely.
Don't forget to take care of yourself!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks Job- I hope she continues to recover her memory as well. She's definitely improving in her mobility and I'm able to get her back to TX and rehab tomorrow! Yay! She does get a little " sundowner" affect in the evenings though and gets combative. She pulled the IV out of her neck last night apparently. At least she's feisty!
As for me I'm trying to take care of myself as best I can. I'm worried about making extra money for the tax repayment- but I decided to take Monday off just to rest and regroup as I'm exhausted! I'm also thinking about my sitch and feeling sad today- maybe just all the things going on and the holidays. Will work on getting back into my GAL as soon as I get back- boot camp, massages and maybe even a few social events! Looking forward to seeing my kiddos too!!
Me 41 H 40 M 20 T 23 S 19,16, 8 D 13 BD1 dec 2012 not sure going to work BD2 sep 2013 seeking a D Filed oct 2013, D Feb 2015 Life is about daring greatly, about being in the arena- Brene Brown
Daring, I'm glad to read that your mom is improving! That's great news.
Sooo... If you're planning some GAL stuff...and, say, want to do day-trip northbound, I could do a day-trip southbound.....and WE COULD KNOCK OUT OUR GAL THINGYS TOGETHER!!!
Because I got nothin'.
....yet.
Meaning nothin' yet.
"Yet" being the operative word.... (Working on it, uR and Eric )
Kids have stuff going on this weekend but how's Sat the 20th looking?
Me 41 H 40 M 20 T 23 S 19,16, 8 D 13 BD1 dec 2012 not sure going to work BD2 sep 2013 seeking a D Filed oct 2013, D Feb 2015 Life is about daring greatly, about being in the arena- Brene Brown
So glad to hear the encouraging news about your mom. It is also good to hear H is being supportive. Sending you good wishes and hugs for healing vibes all the way around.
Wish I still lived in Austin. I'd love to crash the meetup.
M:25 years at BD w/ 2 daughters BD: 5/14 Separated 6/14 - H moved cross country w/OW D Final 9/17
“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” ― Maya Angelou
Gwen- agreed! We can find a place to meet-up near all of us if you're still in the vicinity.
Shining I downloaded the app- should I search for you?
So this was my journaling today. I know I'm feeling exhausted so I'm sure that's some of the ho hum.....
Ugggh this feeling $uck$! H picked us up from airport- brought s8 and d13 which was awesome. He was nice and helpful with mom. Ruffled my hair at airport asking if I was ok. Stepped outside and helped me put stuff together once we got to the rehab. Asked what else I needed. He asked what's next for my mom? I said depends- he said what if this is best she gets? I said assisted living. He thought insurance covers some- I said no I will have to pay for it. I said do you want to go to lunch with kids and swing back for me or I can take a cab once I'm done settling mom in. He said either way- but clearly didn't really want to wait or pick me up. Made me feel very sad. I know he's tired from carting kids around this weekend and he was nice enough to help me this much but it just leaves me feeling so alone. I'm tired of all this- I just want someone to share my life with and hold me when I'm down.
Me 41 H 40 M 20 T 23 S 19,16, 8 D 13 BD1 dec 2012 not sure going to work BD2 sep 2013 seeking a D Filed oct 2013, D Feb 2015 Life is about daring greatly, about being in the arena- Brene Brown
How is mom doing now that she's back in TX? I'm sure you are glad to be home and that your mother is not far away. Check around about assisted living and see what is offered for the elderly. There may be some programs you can apply to for assistance for her.
Please take some time to recharge your batteries. You've had a lot of stuff and stress on your plate the last few weeks. I do hope that everything will settle down and you can find a bit of time to rest.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Uggh some more. I got back to my house in the cab and H was there as he was dropping off the kids. I walk in and he says " the dogs shattered the salt flavor test tubes- there was glass all over and the cats peed in D13s room." I hadn't even taken a breath. I said " ok- anything else?" He must have sensed the frustration in my voice and said " we took care of everything already". He said kids had been very good, told me what kiddos each needed to work on. Then said " you seem overwhelmed" and told S8 to give me a minute. S8 was all excited to decorate tree and H mentioned he had been waiting to do it.
Then he sat down for a few min- asked me if mom was still angry acting. I said not really but she said something g this morning that it would have been nice if i had called and checked on her ( she had forgotten I was there all day). I said I know she just forgot but it hit something for me. He said " hit what"? I didn't get to answer b/c the kids interrupted us. I was going to say that basically I feel like nothing I do is ever enough for anyone. Prob better that I didn't get to say it. Then he said S16 has been sick for 4 days, strep test was neg but he thinks might be wrong. I said I can put him on an antibiotic.... He said well look at his throat first. I said if it's going on this long might as well try. I was writing the prescription and he put his arm on my shoulder to say he was leaving and was I going to be ok. He seemed uncomfortable. I was a bit teary and said- I'll be fine. He said ok I'll leave you alone- seemed maybe a bit annoyed? I said I wasn't trying to be ugly, I don't know how else to answer- what were you looking for? He said " nothing" and seemed like he couldn't get out of there fast enough.
Of course my mind is spinning- oh he prob feels bad or uncomfortable b/c he's about to dump the D papers on me, or b/c he doesn't really care about me, or b/c we are doing Christmas decorating tonight ( though the kids tell me he has a tree too). As I write this I'm thinking it could also be guilt at how overwhelmed and sad and alone I obviously feel. Who the F knows?!
I texted an hour or so after he left " Thank you for your help today. I apologize if I made you upset- I don't know what other answer to give when you ask if I'll be ok- fine is pretty much the only choice I have. "
I know I probably shouldn't have- but I just couldn't leave it alone. He hasn't responded. Prob won't.
I just feel like I'm hitting my emotional breaking point. I know I need to get through tax hearing on Wed and then see how mom will do and plan as best I can.
Me 41 H 40 M 20 T 23 S 19,16, 8 D 13 BD1 dec 2012 not sure going to work BD2 sep 2013 seeking a D Filed oct 2013, D Feb 2015 Life is about daring greatly, about being in the arena- Brene Brown
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