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I'd like to add one more thing to what KML has posted. She needs to consider going to an anger management class. Does she not realize that you could have her arrested for hitting you? She needs to get some serious help with this behavior, the sooner the better. This type of behavior is unacceptable.

Maybe it's time for her to go live w/her father or your mother. Maybe then she'll come to realize that you are doing the best you can and have tried to be the one and all for her.

Time for her to grow up and now is the time for her to face the consequences of her actions. Calling you names is disrespectful, hitting you is totally out of line. She needs professional help.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed. Cripes.

I keep hearing Graham Chapman from Monty Python in the Confuse-a-Cat skit say, "Are you at your WIT'S END?"

So...this morning, following the argument with D20 and the text from Smokey...the publisher informed me that the former owner of the newspaper was in far deeper debt than anyone knew...to the tune of $145,000 owed to the IRS. So, the paper they purchased, for me to edit...they are NOT purchasing. Instead, they are ripping up the deal and just going rogue with their own newspaper. I will be the editor of the same newspaper, but it will have a different name. The want to sever all ties to the former owner in case any of these liens come due for the corporation.

The publisher was all full of assurances that things are still going as planned and yadda, yadda...but, there had been a lot of talking behind my back while I was working on the paper. They didn't want to ruffle my feathers or upset me while there was this transition from one editor to another. I can see how they were nervous I would freak out after moving my whole life from Ohio to NY.

Still, I'm not cool with the conversations that went on about my newspaper behind my back.

Once I'm a bit more entrenched in this system and feel I'm delivering a quality product...this will be addressed.

I did, however, feel reassured that the company has a solid plan for this paper. I'm a little concerned with all the acquisitions being made. Lots of weeklies being bought up.

I need to keep my eyes on the prize...for me, I see the Farm & Dairy as the lucrative piece of this puzzle and I made sure the publisher understood my desire to remain editor of that publication when it's time to publish.

Ok. So, there's the work piece.

And, I guess it felt like more pressure on an already pressure-filled transition.

A lil' burned out.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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As far as D20 is concerned:

She hates, hates, hates being a dishwasher.

Whatever.

She keeps dwelling on how this isn't getting her along in her studies and yadda, yadda, yadda...

Now, as far as I'm concerned. This place has been ideal for right now. The hours are great. They didn't require any criminal background check. They adore her and the owners are a really fun group of men. Three gays who love the same stuff that D20 loves and joke around with her and it's a nice place.

Still, she has complained and whined about the work since she started.

I've also noticed her PMA falling. She has been dwelling more on the negatives and been a bit harsh with D12. Not major, but she has shown some of her old D20 colors and that's upset me.

I also haven't seen her take action when it comes to addressing the issues at hand...paying off the $2500, getting the exhaust on the Jeep figured out...

She has yet to contribute to our monthly income. But, this morning, she stunned me when she asked if I was paying for her birth control for her acne. I said, "NO."

She asked, "How come?"

Seriously?

And, she has been texting her sisters from her sorority non-stop...as if she is still there and a part of things. She wants to visit next week.

I guess I'm a little pi$$ed off. I have no, none, zippo intention of sidetracking my life for yet another untreated alcoholic.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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Then, there's D12.

We've been here a month. Next week...I don't have to work on Wednesday. That's great. Still, leaving on her own devices on Monday and Tuesday really stinks.

I need her involved in something. I feel horrible guilt at all the attention I've been giving my job.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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I'd really like a soft place to land right now.

Maybe that's where the disappointment comes from Smokey. I'd love to have a soft place to land for ME.

He ain't soft and he ain't the place to land. I know. He's dark and spooky...like a haunted house. Just a fantasy.

I'm going to relax a bit tonight.

I will clear my head and talk to D20 tomorrow. I will also search Al-Anon meetings.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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Tonight, it all feels like too much.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

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Oh, and my mother called today. JOY!


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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I feel very alone in this spooky world tonight.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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You've got a lot on your plate...but you are strong and you know what you need to do.

So, that explains some of what is going on in your D20's head, i.e., the texting w/the group at college. I'm going to ask you a question and I want you to think about it for a while. Do you think your daughter sees this college as a place to run away to? Do you think she wants to go to school there now because of the fun and social activities w/the other students or do you think she honestly wants to get her degree at this time? If she seriously wants to learn, she can prove that to you, but most importantly to herself by working a job, paying off the $2500 loan and seriously considering taking one or two night courses until the fall semester and then she can look at where she's at in meeting her financial responsibilities and goals.

I had to laugh, but I was extremely proud of you, when she asked about her birth control pills for her acne. Doesn't she realize that she's an adult now and working a job. A job, no matter how important, is better than nothing. If she hates the dishwasher position, she can always look for something else while she continues to wash dishes.

I'm very concerned about her behavior. She has shown that she can be verbally and physically abusive and that's not good. Heather, I'm very worried about you and your youngest daughter being around her when she's acting out. Does she only act out like this when she doesn't get her way? Was she bulled as a child? There is something going on w/her that needs to be addressed by a professional. Unfortunately, you are too close to the issue and you can't help her. You can't fix something that you didn't break.

Set your boundaries and stick to them. If she needs acne medicine, she is earning some money and can purchase the medication herself. If she can go back to the college for a few days and spend money, she can also figure out how to pay for the necessities she needs to live. How is she planning to get there if the jeep needs work? Surely you aren't going to loan her the rental car?

Heather you've worked hard, you've earned the respect the you should have gotten many years ago and your daughter needs to learn to respect you. Stand your ground w/her. If she doesn't like it, she can leave. But, I can assure you, if she does leave, she'll be back because she can't make it on her own w/o you taking care of her.

Good luck!


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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I hear you Job. Thanks for the support.

Looked up Al-Anon and A.A. meetings.

Taking D12 to Walmart for popcorn and fun stuff for tonight. :-)

Thanks Ellie :-)


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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