Hey Shining. Thanks. You are right. And trust me... I don't look that long. I just happened to look up and he was looking dead at me. I turned right away. It was as he walked past, a few seconds later that I heard him say hi, I happened to look up and catch the back of him as he was "greeting" my mom's friend. The poor lady. She looked like she was going to puke on him.
Great analogy with the lollipop (or doggie doo doo). That's exactly how it feels. He's a jerk. I just don't know why he wants to try to rub it in. I don't ever give him the satisfaction of showing him he bothers me at all. He doesn't even deserve the energy of my rage. It still hurts.
I think I am realizing where my emotions are coming from. It's the finality of it all. Everything was so quick. I was dbing. I had hope of a future together. One phone call and it was over. A 2 minute phone call. Nothing was really said that had anything to do with us. It was about them. That ended us. But it was about them.
Now I am really realizing that it is over. I haven't fully accepted it. But I'm starting to. It is a lot to take in. That and the baby sitch.
All that is hard enough to deal with. To have him rub it in does not make it any easier. But I am getting there. I just have my moments.
Thanks for your ever-giving support. Good luck on day two.
If it makes you feel any better, the fact that he is trying to rub it in tells me that (a) he is a really messed up person; (b) he is trying too hard to prove he is happy, which leads me to believe he is not; and (c) he still has some feelings for you deep down and they are coming out in this bizarre way.
I didn't expect my world to disintegrate either. Just prior to June, I was so happy and secure, and now I will never be the same again and my future is gone. It's so cruel and unfair. The ironic thing is that my fiance met the OW on a plane in January - on a flight he would have missed if I HAD NOT RUSHED HIS PASSPORT TO THE AIRPORT WHEN HE FORGOT IT...
Now he is the coldest person - he just totally detached from me and our life. He won't even see our dog who he adored, because I think he is afraid to feel...
Engaged Aug 2009 Fiancé had doubts Jan 2010 Happily re-engaged July 2012 Discovery of affair July 2014 Separated July 2014 Fiancé is confused about whom to choose Chose the OW Oct 2014
Methinks he doth protest too much - seems like he's putting on a show to make you think he's doing ok.
How about next time, YOU be the one texting and giggling over your responses? Talking on the phone? (To the time lady, if she still exists, or whoever). I'd love to see his reaction if it REALLY looked like you were moving on lol.
Look, the bottom line is, he HAS to make this look good, otherwise he looks like the idiot he is for giving everything up that he had. To be with a woman WHO PROBABLY ISN'T EVEN CARRYING HIS BABY!!! I'm still waiting for the DNA tests once that baby comes out. No, it's not impossible for it to be his, but the odds are still against it.
Hmm.. Yes, much too much. Kind of like HS and you want your ex significant other to notice you having fun.
I told ya, Mighty, mine did similar. Went way out of her way to do it. Still does if she gets the chance. Wants me to know just how "happy" she is. Or what a great parent she is. Or how she's "normal" and the "victim" etc.
Does it really make sense to argue with somebody with that capability to reason? Or rather, the lack of capability?
He's a nutter. You cannot argue with a nutter. You'd be better off arguing with a red rubber ball and spitting in the wind. Both can be entertaining, but you will not succeed in doing anything but wasting your time, my dear.
KML is spot on. He has to make it look good (to whom?) else he is a big fool. And he knows it.
Want to really get even with him?
Live a great life without giving him any thought. It's the best revenge ever
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
Zimmie, thanks for stopping in. I know that sometimes I let my thoughts get carried away by my emotions. Perspective. That's what helps me deal. That's why I come here. Your: a,b,c examples, they gave me perspective. For that, I thank you.
And the passport thing.... grrrrrr. That stinks. But I have to have faith that we are put on this path for a reason. Whatever it is. So, I have to think the same for you. As much as that hurts, and does not take away the sting, and as much as you wish you could intervene with this crazy train... or have derailed it's path before it hit Loonyville.... But I think it was destined to go there regardless of what we did. Sorry you are here.
kml- I like the way you think. And I've gotta say... it has crossed my mind a few times to show up at one of these places with a super hot guy. Not that I would with my kids, but the funny thing is that my kids would be happy. Wouldn't that be super sweet for him to see me with a hot guy and my kids hanging with him too! Especially since hww is not at all welcome by my kids. They want me to get with someone. I have to explain to them that I need time. But at least I can envision it! The look on his face... would he be king of the earth to see another man with his family?
"I'm still waiting for the DNA tests once that baby comes out," says kml.
Well you and me both! I wonder if there are others here on the edge of their seat. Is there a pool going? Am I the Jerry Springer drama of the site? Oh man.....
AJ, your post made me crack up. It brought me back to reality (as laughing does that for me). "He's a nutter." I just love that. I am always going to think of that line when I have to be in his presence. That is what is going to keep me grounded. Hopefully.
I do have a little reprieve. S17's playoff game is Friday. The chances of them winning is slim to none (sorry, bud). But, it is 2 hours away. Doubt if xh will make it. (I don't think he went to s17's game on Sat. They are still on the outs, but that is so immature. S17 got an amazing TD and he was so excited.) At least he could read about it in the paper!
D13's last volleyball game was last night. A couple weeks before next season's basketball games start up.
Let's see what the break will bring. There has been no contact since Friday. That's the longest in awhile. I know it is very bland and blah... and "official" (unnecessary communication, if you ask me). But as of late, xh has been contacting me daily or every couple. This is a record for a bit now.
Things are a-changin'! Don't know how or why... to be continued.
I soooooo wish I could see those pics!!!!!!! That is AWESOME! Did he ask about me?
I'm OK. Today is 1 year from bd. Boooooooo!
I've been busy with kids. Did lots of GAL over the weekend. Wooo hoooo....
Been riding the emotional rollercoaster. You know, that nauseating ride that I can't totally get off from. Or you know, after riding all day at the amusement park, when you go to bed, you still feel like you are riding it. I think that's what's happening. The after affects.
Soooo... how's the job? So exciting. You got lot's going on, girl! That's awesome. And putting your mind on the thing you should- you (and all your gloriousness)!
Haha!!!! Yeah....DG was asking....he wanted me to give you an old flannel shirt of Kurt's?? Idk.... He got a little stalker-ish and weird, like woogie in Something about Mary.....so I had to set the boundary. As usual.. >sigh<.
A year, huh.....dang.
A lot is going on, M....it would be weird if you weren't feeling any of it. You're so ridiculously strong, whether you see it or not. Strong doesn't mean you don't get sad and stressed.... It means you do exactly what you're doing. You're here, posting, venting, and DANG!!!! Helping others!!!! You friggin rock! I've read what you write to some new DBer's. Remember how scary the beginning was?? And you, with everything else, are reaching out to help them in the most desperate of days.
That's some tough a$$ stuff, Mighty. It's a gift. You're really good at it. REALLY good.
Helping them has to make you feel kinda good, right?
Wwwwwhhhhaaaaatttttt????? Shining, really, that's the nicest thing anyone has said to me in a long time. I appreciate it.
I try to give my support, because I do know how tough it is at the beginning. It makes my heart hurt. Sometimes it is too hard to read. But, I don't know... people probably wonder why the heck I would give advice when I'm so screwed up. I know what has helped me, so I try to offer that.
