Thank you Nitty. I will report back when I serve my first Nitty Stew!
Had a good meeting with a new counselor I have been seeing, Christian and has been thru divorce. He told me the grief and depression is healthy, and not to fight or deny it like some people try to. But he also encouraged me to start developing a vision of what is to come, what type of man and father I want to become. I am getting flickerings of hope, starting to realize I will actually survive this initial period and things will get better. And that good things are ahead.
Me:42 W:41 M:12 T:3 D7, D7, S5 Sep#1 Winter 2012 for 4 months W divorce bomb 6/9/14 Started "in-house separation" 7/2014 W files for D 8/28/14 I move out 9/27/14
I'll echo what Nitty said about planning. I've had some extended time with kids lately because the wife took a few weekends away with her aunt. Then she had outpatient surgery and doesn't feel so hot.
Anyway, when I handle the kids in and out the door, that stuff goes like clockwork. Backpacks, lessons, lunch, school uniforms, all handled before 8PM the night before. Today, when I left for work without dropping them, D8 said, "Dad, aren't you taking us to school." Sorry, sweetie, not today. "I like it when you take us. It's fun."
Heh. Minor win for the Dadster.
Last edited by Shakspr; 09/26/1403:52 AM.
Me: 43 XW: 43 T15 M14 D21, SS15, S11, D8 BD: 8/6 EA / possible PA discovered 9/29 D final 10/20
M:54, H:55 T:33, M:27 12/13 BD: EA 01/14 BD: PA, H leaves 03/14 H & OW break up 05/14 H says he will file for D 08/14 H initiates D 09/14 H wants to R 12/14 Still bungling our way through R
HopeTex -- If you're worried about preparing everyday meals, maybe think of cooking as one of your GAL activities -- take a cooking class if you can, or just turn it into a fun activity (maybe one involving the kids, even). If you're able to make getting to school fun, I'm sure you can make cooking fun as well. Don't think of it as a chore -- think of it as a fun way to connect with the kids, and you'll look at it in a different light. Also, kids the age of yours tend not to have very high expectations when it comes to cuisine -- especially if they get to have a role in preparing it! Good luck.
M: 43 H: 39 D: 14 Married 15 Together 16 BD: 6/2014 S: 8/2014 OW revealed 10/2014 Instigated dissolution 12/2014, in progress So over it!
HopeTex, I am The Queen of getting dinner on the table day in and day out. I am fairly picky about food, almost totally avoiding processed foods, opting to cook whole foods from scratch instead. I also avoid gluten and soy and my D16 is a Type 1 diabetic. Planning and prep is definitely the key. I use a meal planning ap that I've loaded family favorites into, and once a week I plan my meals for the week. It's as easy as assigning a day to them from the ap. The grocery list automatically populates and I shop on the weekends. I also do a lot of prep work on the weekends, washing veggies, chopping onions, marinating things, making sauces. The crockpot and rice cooker are my best friends. If my H grills, I always ask him to throw a couple extra things on. When I get home at 7:00pm and dinner can be ready at 7:15pm, I'm grateful.
You will figure out a method that works for you and pretty soon it will be very natural for you. Good luck.
I use a meal planning ap that I've loaded family favorites into, and once a week I plan my meals for the week. It's as easy as assigning a day to them from the ap. The grocery list automatically populates and I shop on the weekends.
Is this a free app? What's it called?
M 16 T 17 W moved in w/ AP (OW) 5/14 ILYBNIL 5/14 A discovered 6/14 D papers served via USPS 8/14 Filed my response 9/14 D final 5/15...
I hope it's allowed to say......my apologies in advance if this needs to be removed. Please let me know.
When I first started with the ap, it was Food on the Table and there was a free version and a paid version. Somewhere along the line it changed to Food.com, which I still see in the ap store, but since I already have it, I can't see the price. It takes a while to load up all your recipes, but its' totally worth it.
HopeTex- I just wanted to add to all the excellent meal making advice - that you might want to do some of it WITH your kids. I've been doing much more of this since BD. The kids love it and of course they are much more likely to eat something that they prepared.
This has been the hardest week of my life. Moving out Friday and Saturday was the most emotionally and physically exhausting experience of my life. Really horrific for me, realizing that it was actually happening. But I did manage to get it done, and get the new place set up. Kids are doing their first sleepover tonite.
I feel like I haven't recovered from the trauma of the move. I am woozy, in a fog, and get easily overwhelmed by everyday tasks. I start something, or think of doing something, and a wave washes over me, floods me. Sometimes I can push thru and get it done, other times I can't. Still having trouble sleeping, doc and I are on the third different prescription drug and still I get just a few hours a night.
People tell me this is all natural, but it is terrible and it feels like I am going crazy. Hope to get some relief soon.
Me:42 W:41 M:12 T:3 D7, D7, S5 Sep#1 Winter 2012 for 4 months W divorce bomb 6/9/14 Started "in-house separation" 7/2014 W files for D 8/28/14 I move out 9/27/14
