Can I get her back??..

[LoveMyW]

Oh, and my copy of DR should be arriving any day.. Already found myself a copy of DB, but I gather I should be reading DR first??..

[LoveMyW]

Well I had a little slip up in conversation today with W, and it has probably put me a couple of steps back..

The kids mentioned that they were going to a B'day party for one of the W's friends tonight (friend has kids and they were going to a family restaurant).. I don't have an issue with this at all, but I made an off the cuff comment "I suppose you are going to go out drinking tonight".. The comment was said as a joke, and had that tone to it as well, but the W has Aunt flo visiting (if you know what I mean) and fired back with "I'm not, and it's none of your business if I do" plus a couple of other smaller comments.. I mentioned that I was joking, but I can't help but to think that it was taken the wrong way, and that I am back a couple of rungs down the ladder..

On a positive note, I have been approved for a unit near the W and kids, so a move will be coming up shortly!!..

[SunnyB]

I made an off the cuff comment "I suppose you are going to go out drinking tonight".. The comment was said as a joke, and had that tone to it as well, but the W has Aunt flo visiting (if you know what I mean) and fired back with "I'm not, and it's none of your business if I do" plus a couple of other smaller comments.. I mentioned that I was joking, but I can't help but to think that it was taken the wrong way, and that I am back a couple of rungs down the ladder..

Just because Aunt Flo is visiting doesn't mean that wasn't an offensive comment. And you saying you were joking after the fact doesn't fix it, either. Own it.

[LoveMyW]

I made an off the cuff comment "I suppose you are going to go out drinking tonight".. The comment was said as a joke, and had that tone to it as well, but the W has Aunt flo visiting (if you know what I mean) and fired back with "I'm not, and it's none of your business if I do" plus a couple of other smaller comments.. I mentioned that I was joking, but I can't help but to think that it was taken the wrong way, and that I am back a couple of rungs down the ladder..

Just because Aunt Flo is visiting doesn't mean that wasn't an offensive comment. And you saying you were joking after the fact doesn't fix it, either. Own it.

rppfl, I am thinking it was one of those "had to be there" scenarios to see how it rolled off the tongue, and how it sounded.. I'm not really seeing how the comment would be offensive though, if you could please further explain that??.. No argument intended, but I'm just not seeing the offensiveness..

[SunnyB]

rppfl, I am thinking it was one of those "had to be there" scenarios to see how it rolled off the tongue, and how it sounded.. I'm not really seeing how the comment would be offensive though, if you could please further explain that??.. No argument intended, but I'm just not seeing the offensiveness..

Love, that's just the way it struck me when I read it. Maybe I had to be there. But clearly your W didn't think it as amusing as you did and my point is, don't be so quick to blame it on Aunt Flo. At least consider that it might have been something about the comment or the situation itself.

[LoveMyW]

rppfl, I am thinking it was one of those "had to be there" scenarios to see how it rolled off the tongue, and how it sounded.. I'm not really seeing how the comment would be offensive though, if you could please further explain that??.. No argument intended, but I'm just not seeing the offensiveness..

Love, that's just the way it struck me when I read it. Maybe I had to be there. But clearly your W didn't think it as amusing as you did and my point is, don't be so quick to blame it on Aunt Flo. At least consider that it might have been something about the comment or the situation itself.

Point taken.. The blame wasn't fully on Aunt, but I have said that before in the same joking manner and got a good giggle out of her.. You may be right about it being the comment/situation.. Maybe the timing was wrong??.. She may not have been feeling 100%??.. Who knows.. All I know is that I backslid slightly and have to make up that ground again.. It's funny how something so small can bring you back down in attitude..

[Georgiabelle]

Love,

Just a thought. Things that your w used to think were funny, may not resonate the same with her now.

[LoveMyW]

Well it's a bit of a rough day today.. I'm pretty angered with myself for saying what I said yesterday, and I can't help but to think I'm back further than step one but who knows..

Basically, I feel like the earlier days of separation and all that keeps playing in my head is the W telling me to move on and that she isn't in love with me etc.. Things seemed to be going so well too considering.. Maybe they still are, and I'm just beating myself up on it??..

I'm almost feeling like it's done for good, but I still want to keep up the fight.. That's just my train of thought for today.. I will work through it and get over it though..

On another not, DR should be arriving any day now.. Started to read DB last night, but my head wasn't in it.. Also, many people suggest DR over DB, so that might be best to wait for it..

[LoveMyW]

Nothing really to report from the last few days.. No advancements or setbacks..

STILL waiting on DR to arrive!!.. Shipping from UK can be a nightmare apparently!!..

One thing to note, I think in some ways I have been mistaking the warm conversation for amicability.. I don't know but that's the feeling I have..

Talking to the W last night and to cut a long story short, she mentioned that she doesn't want R "at this stage in her life".. I asked her what she meant by that as I didn't understand, and she said "you would have to be a woman to understand"..

Can anyone explain to me what the heck that is all about??..

Sometimes I get the felling that I am fighting a losing battle mainly because every day feels like a month, and the more time we are separated, the further away she is distancing herself.. I'm still not prepared to give up though.. The advice here is brilliant, but I can't wait to get the DR book..

[LoveMyW]

Just thinking, but there is something I need to get out of my head too..

I keep thinking to myself "my sitch is different to everyone else's, and nothing is going to work".. I read the comments on the boards here, and I know it is no different, but sometimes I think that..

Is that normal for LBS??..