I'm so glad you found love again...in the form of makeup.
You seem to be doing fairly well with detaching. Your H seems to be a little lost right now, what with the secretly placed fake old letters.
Sorry you have had to deal with all the bad. Enjoy the newfound fun person you seem to be turning into.
Me: 34 W:33 T: 10 M: 6 S: 6 D: 5 BD: 5/14 Still together(ish) Not giving up: 7/14 D talk has slowed, a lot. Gradually working on things together. Still separate bedrooms. Slow and Steady wins the race.
I'm am doing the flip the script on those letters, they were always here, it's not going to be raised at the mediation for settlement. That is money not r! That line of flip the script has helped me to let go of the whole thought they were new. I cannot be sure!
I am also thinking if h raises any r issues, then I will be using the line, things are not that simple any more. If he places pressure for answers then I will be saying I will hear you out but I need time to digest and consider my answers. Or if he pushes the rec barrow he will be asked to formulate that plan. I am not expecting much, he couldn't even say hello weeks ago in person. He did however wave when I passed him on the road yesterday. He got the " I don't see you wave! Aka none or not even acknowledgement!"
I want to get him to also agree to leave my son alone. He was sleep walking etc. throwing up and very very stressed. He saw h yesterday in town, he was stressed last night and he had a verbal spew at me! So in a way I need to broach some r issues as h assulted son last year.
I think a nc for my son would be nice. Help him heal and acknowledge its not going to change. H has had 9months to consider his position and given the news he was dating openly late last year I think the ship has sunk.
Last edited by Ggrass; 09/01/1412:43 PM.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
Sounds like you've not only dropped the rope, you sound ready to set it on fire.
I don't blame you for wanting to keep him away from your son. That sounds very toxic.
No matter what, I think you seem ready to live life to the fullest.
Me: 34 W:33 T: 10 M: 6 S: 6 D: 5 BD: 5/14 Still together(ish) Not giving up: 7/14 D talk has slowed, a lot. Gradually working on things together. Still separate bedrooms. Slow and Steady wins the race.
Tempted today to send ss25 a text for his birthday. Might be a bit ironic tho being mediation and settlement today!
Bit teary last night, snotty too. Throats rough scratchy this am but there is no way I will cancel.
Got to move butt! Or I won't get to go shopping before hand. I thought nice looking jeans in the correct size and a cute shirt will show off the weight loss nicely!
Need to do a fancy war paint too, looking to do natural look with Flicky eyeliner in the new navy. I know he hates make up, cause it makes you look good!
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
Me: 34 W:33 T: 10 M: 6 S: 6 D: 5 BD: 5/14 Still together(ish) Not giving up: 7/14 D talk has slowed, a lot. Gradually working on things together. Still separate bedrooms. Slow and Steady wins the race.
Practices thanks for your honnesty, I appreciate it!
I'm sure I won't if he starts name calling etc, but that's unlike with a third party. He's all about social correctness and looking good right and nice.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
I am also thinking if h raises any r issues, then I will be using the line, things are not that simple any more. If he places pressure for answers then I will be saying I will hear you out but I need time to digest and consider my answers. Or if he pushes the rec barrow he will be asked to formulate that plan. I am not expecting much, he couldn't even say hello weeks ago in person.
My next appt in Wednesday and I'm rehearsing for every eventuality just as you are. It looks like you've got a good plan.
I'll be thinking of you, Ggrass. You hang tough.
M:54, H:55 T:33, M:27 12/13 BD: EA 01/14 BD: PA, H leaves 03/14 H & OW break up 05/14 H says he will file for D 08/14 H initiates D 09/14 H wants to R 12/14 Still bungling our way through R
He however laughed and joked played the confused victim. Wanted to play straight swaps. Mmmm well when I said come up with options, he said I have none I have no idea what the agenda was. He talked of being exhausted from fighting oh dear! That's from a man that says I never take his calls um yes he rang my house twice when I wasn't here told me if I were to ring ever, he will ignore my calls.
He left out the little car he supposedly gave to ow, I mentioned the car he gave away.
He replyed I got paid in full! Lol he charged the ow for her car, lol there's a surprise. His assets are totally in his words double mine. Absolutely. He's a nut! Thru and thru.
Nothing was truely sorted, he has 30 days at his request.
My reply is I do not make snap decisions any more period. 30 days is fine. I forgot some db, but calm mostly. Now he can get on the front foot or not! The choice is his. I'm not sure I validated much.
But and there is always a butt!
This time is was my butt, I bought wrangler jeans in a size 15! size 16 shirt all new. I looked hot new eyeliner new hair from 2 weeks ago well newly died.
I love the new jeans, they make me walk funny! Swagger almost H was the post child for narc behaviour. He laughed and joked with the mediator. He did the over exaggerated double take complete with gasp! He used the mlc excuse of she never said she wanted a mediated settlement. Really now to wait.
I have to formulate a list of items to be returned that's not pursuit? Right even If I have to make first contact.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
H was the post child for narc behaviour. He laughed and joked with the mediator.
So did my H. I think MLCers are experts on the "Act As If" philosophy. "Act as If This is a Lark."
Quote:
I love the new jeans, they make me walk funny! Swagger almost
That is the Badass GGrass Swagger! You go, GGrass!
M:54, H:55 T:33, M:27 12/13 BD: EA 01/14 BD: PA, H leaves 03/14 H & OW break up 05/14 H says he will file for D 08/14 H initiates D 09/14 H wants to R 12/14 Still bungling our way through R
Maybe acting as If "I'm as silly as a lark! " works straight from the mlc hym sheet!
I love the bit where I said I used to phone you back until you said several times. Ner ner you rang I ignored you! so I don't waste my time!
So my list of items will be written like my posts from here, Lordy Lordy I've thought up some really great lines to use already.
I thought when talking of options I might seriously open with
To my dearly beloved x gg I bequeath the grey plastic porta throne, the one which I bought her cause she was anti peeing at long drops.
Can you tell I've been using my gift of time from last night humorously! I didn't sleep much sigh
That's just the openers. I will give him one week, then I will send my list and offers of settlement.
Feeling bright and happy, but tired
Dances,
So Congo, Congo, Congo kick Congo Congo Congo kick.
In other news I did wish ss now 25 happy birthday. Refered to myself as we did years ago as wicked step mother. Reply was ;)nope just super wicked humor, so hence the ideas for humorous lists. Retail therapy in a city sat. Might go out after work Friday. Just for coffee with friend to get her list of shopping from the make up chain I've been mail ordering from.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
