You selfish bast*rd for tiring the kid out at the zoo. Come on, really? I read nothing argumentative in that transaction on your part. Oh how familiar this all sounds.
Last edited by Jefe; 10/03/1402:52 PM.
Me 47 - W 35 M 9 - T 10 2 Daughters - 7 & 9 Discovery of EA- 8/4/14 S - 8/5/15 D mentioned - 9/11/14 R & Piecing - 3/17/15 Regard one another as more important than yourselves. - Philippians 2:3
I would have just said "Wow." or "I'm sorry you feel that way, but he had a good time and he was tired." If she persisted, I would have ended the conversation with a "I'm not going to apologize to you for my parenting, and I'm certainly not going to sit here and listen to you spew profanities at me. As much as you may think everything I do is centered around YOU, please don't flatter yourself -- I was only trying to show our son a good time, and it made him tired. End of conversation."
Minus the edits, and the censored bits that the DB webmasters did, that was a verbatim text conversation.
I like the way that was put Starsky. Instead of not replying making a stand would have been much better. Would have been much stronger. Unfortunately, needed to collect myself before responding and then chose to let it go.
Thanks for the feedback, and yes my W is a real gem
Next time I will let him watch tv for hours........why would I want to spend time with him anyways, he's only my S?? Sometimes....
Remember the balance between validating and not tolerating disrespectful behavior, actions, or words.
Wanna re-read the Validation Cheat Sheet again?
Truthfully, your W is having a taste of what life's like outside of the marital home with young children. And she's NOT liking it one bit as it "interferes" with her schedule and/or plans. Ugh. Wakey, wakey, wakey wife!!! C'mon...it's all because of your choices.
Me 47 - W 35 M 9 - T 10 2 Daughters - 7 & 9 Discovery of EA- 8/4/14 S - 8/5/15 D mentioned - 9/11/14 R & Piecing - 3/17/15 Regard one another as more important than yourselves. - Philippians 2:3
Looks like I got blocked once again. Anytime I seem to be making progress.....slam. Lots of threats to get a lawyer on her behalf. She was frustrated today that one of my kids activities would occur when she wanted to do another activity. This was the first time she mentioned it, and I was accused of not listening to her at all. She said she needs to get a lawyer so she could have a voice, and then denied having ever okayed the activity. This is the second week of the activity, and the first time anything has been mentioned.
I wrote an angry bitter and to be honest hurtful and mean letter to her, then I read it over and deleted it. Not worth it, I'm not sure if that follows DB principles, but it worked for me. Then I questioned myself, is this how I truly feel? I like to think the self check and realization that sending it would not do anything shows progress and my growth. It was very heartfelt, but it was laden with consequences, which she is realizing on her own.
Looks like I got blocked once again. Anytime I seem to be making progress.....slam. Lots of threats to get a lawyer on her behalf. She was frustrated today that one of my kids activities would occur when she wanted to do another activity. This was the first time she mentioned it, and I was accused of not listening to her at all. She said she needs to get a lawyer so she could have a voice, and then denied having ever okayed the activity. This is the second week of the activity, and the first time anything has been mentioned.
Could you please give some more details on what transpired? It is pretty general here and it is hard for us to help you when it is not exactly clear on what happened or who said what.
This would help in getting a better picture of what happened.
