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I have been noticing a lot of the teenager version of my wife lately. She has been flipping me the bird a lot lately and calling me a Mother F'er.

I don't give her a reaction to her antics. I just carry on as it everything was as it should be.

Any advice or thoughts on her behavior? I think it is normal for the MLCer. What do you think?


She has also been pushing hard to negotiate a settlement for the D so we don't have to fight it our in court. I totally agree with her but, what she is asking me for financially would have me living out of my car.

BKS


M46 W45 T12 M10 S9 D4
BD 2/13
Divorced 5/14
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Originally Posted By: BKS
I have been noticing a lot of the teenager version of my wife lately. She has been flipping me the bird a lot lately and calling me a Mother F'er.
I don't give her a reaction to her antics. I just carry on as it everything was as it should be.

Any advice or thoughts on her behavior? I think it is normal for the MLCer. What do you think?


One thing comes to my mind! Tell her to stop this behavior or you will simply leave the communication. If she can’t talk or communicate in a decent manner and with proper language then don’t talk to her!
How would you react if your neighbor did this to you?


Originally Posted By: BKS
She has also been pushing hard to negotiate a settlement for the D so we don't have to fight it our in court. I totally agree with her but, what she is asking me for financially would have me living out of my car.


Give her what is demanded by law! No more – no less! Let this be solved by lawyers and law – nobody and nothing else! Get the legal advice you need on this one and do NOT make any kind of deal with her! If she wants to go down this road then make her do the work on a settlement! Take her work to a lawyer and get advice!
IMHO it is of outmost importance for you NOT to give in to any of this because you hope for R….focus on you! Be fair, but do not give in!
Now I have said it several times – I hope it gets through! smile

Next time she comes at you with this simply look her straight in the eyes and say something like: W, I won’t stand in your way, but I do not feel like the two of us negotiating like this. If you have a proposition then put it on paper and I will take my time to work it through and give you my opinion. Until you have done this I would prefer that you don’t bring this subject up anymore since I am not about to change my mind.

Take the paper and get legal advice!

That’s what I would do – perhaps VETs see it differently and I hope one of them will drop by!

F


Me:44 W:43
D7, D5 (S11 from other R)

T: 8y - not M
ILYB: 8. Mar 2013
W moved: 1. Aug 2013
LRT: 20. Aug 2013
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Thanks Fartiltre,

Its been a while since I have posted. Not much new. Had a couple of court dates and divorce settlement discussions. She has settled down a bit as far as her negativity. Maybe she is being nice for the holidays. Who knows...I don't really care anymore.

I have confirmed that she I indeed having a PA with OM (Frank). She went out last night and told the kids she was going to Rochester to see some friends from college. Im sure she might have gone there but then ended up with OM and stayed the night with him and had sex.

Don't ask me how I got this info because I cant divulge it at the moment just in case she has been tracking this site.

Its a hard pill to swallow but I no longer consider her my wife. I only consider her as my childrens mother.

I am hopeful that we will be divorced by March 4th now. That is when our next court date is. I cant hold on to the hope that things will ever get better and for my own sanity, I have to move on and start looking for happiness elsewhere.

I will try to post more later.

Happy New Year!


M46 W45 T12 M10 S9 D4
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Quote:
I have to move on and start looking for happiness elsewhere.


That would be inside yourself, the only place to truly find it.

I am sorry things didn't work out and that divorce is coming.


M 46
H 44
D 12 S 8
M 9 T 11
BD 2/15/13
"Makes sense to stay together" 5/12/13
Agree we are 'healing' 7/13
Definitely Piecing 9/13
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Thanks LTH,

I agree with you and thanks. happiness does come from within. I am sorry too it didn't work out but I am growing more content with it everyday.

B


M46 W45 T12 M10 S9 D4
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Hello Everyone!

I just want to take a moment and say thank you to everyone here. This site helped me get through the most difficult time in my life.

Although I am not standing for my marriage any longer, I will continue to check in here to see how everyone is doing.

My wish is that your M's will be one of the lucky ones that make it through to the other side of the tunnel. The hope and guidance that this site gives so freely of, probably helped save my life and keeps me from giving up on the notion that two people can make each other happy. Even through our most trying time in our marriages.

God Bless all of you!

BKS


M46 W45 T12 M10 S9 D4
BD 2/13
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Hello Everyone,

I just wanted to stop by and update my situation.

Our divorce is final. I moved out of the house about 3 months ago and I am renting a place until I can buy my own place, which I am working on as we speak.

I have a couple of questions for you all...

Now that I am out and on my own, I feel pretty good about life in general. I am still struggling financially to pay the bills but, I am headed in a positive direction to fix that.

I still hold resentment towards my Ex for what our kids have to go through but, it is what it is now, and they are adjusting to it. It still deeply saddens me that my kids don't have their family unit intact anymore. We are making the best of it though.

My Ex is still antagonistic towards me. I thought that she would settle down after the divorce but she is seemingly "pissed off" at me still.

My question is this.

How long does it typically take for a WAS to settle down and become content with the divorce?

Keep in mind, this was her decision to leave the marriage.


M46 W45 T12 M10 S9 D4
BD 2/13
Divorced 5/14
Joined: May 2013
Posts: 138
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BKS Offline OP
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Posts: 138
Hello Everyone,

I just wanted to stop by and update my situation.

Our divorce is final. I moved out of the house about 3 months ago and I am renting a place until I can buy my own place, which I am working on as we speak.

I have a couple of questions for you all...

Now that I am out and on my own, I feel pretty good about life in general. I am still struggling financially to pay the bills but, I am headed in a positive direction to fix that.

I still hold resentment towards my Ex for what our kids have to go through but, it is what it is now, and they are adjusting to it. It still deeply saddens me that my kids don't have their family unit intact anymore. We are making the best of it though.

My Ex is still antagonistic towards me. I thought that she would settle down after the divorce but she is seemingly "pissed off" at me still.

My question is this.

How long does it typically take for a WAS to settle down and become content with the divorce?

Keep in mind, this was her decision to leave the marriage.


M46 W45 T12 M10 S9 D4
BD 2/13
Divorced 5/14
Joined: May 2013
Posts: 138
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BKS Offline OP
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Keeping for posterity


M46 W45 T12 M10 S9 D4
BD 2/13
DBing 4/13 IC 4/13
W sleeps D4 rm 5/13
Couples MC, W wears ring again 7/12/13
W said she wants D at MC 7/26/13
Received letter from W attorney 8/7/13, D pending


M46 W45 T12 M10 S9 D4
BD 2/13
Divorced 5/14
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