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Joined: Mar 2014
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mdu Offline OP
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I don't know Wonka. There's a definite shift in him since it came out that OW is in his office. My gut is screaming that something is off.

Regardless, I think we both agree that GAL is the way to go. Fortunately I have lots of plans this week and weekend.


M: 42
H: 43
M: 8 years
S7 and D4
H has D19 and S25 from previous M
Bomb: 3/6/14 OW discovered, EA & PA
1st separation, 10 days, decided to reconcile & moved back in. Fail
2nd separation: 5/1/14
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 768
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mdu Offline OP
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P.S. I’m honestly getting kind of fed up with him. Since he announced that OW is in his office he has done little to show me that he’s still interested in reconciling. He was supposed to go to an IC but no clue if he actually has. We haven’t hung out in 2 and ½ weeks. He’s stopped initiating contact like he used to. Yes, he’s got a lot going on but I know him and when he really cares about something he will go out of his way to make it a priority. I feel like I keep signaling to him that the reconciliation is still on the table for me but his actions keep demonstrating otherwise for him. I feel like I should assume that he is involved with OW in some capacity again and behave accordingly --- kid focused contact only. If I discover for sure that he is involved with her again I feel like I have to file for D, I had told him previously that’s a deal breaker.


M: 42
H: 43
M: 8 years
S7 and D4
H has D19 and S25 from previous M
Bomb: 3/6/14 OW discovered, EA & PA
1st separation, 10 days, decided to reconcile & moved back in. Fail
2nd separation: 5/1/14
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 1,433
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Posts: 1,433
I agree: take a breather and GAL. Glad to know you have a full plate ahead.

I can also sense a shift in YOU, mdu. I think you're at the place where you CAN step back a little and detach. In fact, it seems you're already doing that. You've come a long way.

Remain warm when you see him ... but act a little mysterious, too. Keep conversations short. You end them first. Dress nice, wear the perfume he likes. You know the drill. Make him wonder what YOU are up to ... all while remaining warm and neighborly with him.

If I discover for sure that he is involved with her again
Are you planning to try to find out?


M: 40 H: 44
Married 14 years
S11 & D6; D20 & D19 from previous M
2BDs/PAs, 8 years apart
Piecing: April 2014
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 768
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mdu Offline OP
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"If I discover for sure that he is involved with her again
Are you planning to try to find out?"

I might at some point but right now, not sure if I'm emotionally strong enough just yet. I should wait at least another week for the ADs to kick in. Plus I'm not even sure how I would? the only thing I can think is to follow/stalk him. Yuck!!!


M: 42
H: 43
M: 8 years
S7 and D4
H has D19 and S25 from previous M
Bomb: 3/6/14 OW discovered, EA & PA
1st separation, 10 days, decided to reconcile & moved back in. Fail
2nd separation: 5/1/14
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