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I was thinking about you today, so I thought I would stop by to say hello. I'm sending you love and strength as you continue finding your path :-) If you read my book, let me know how you liked it, okay?
XOXO

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Busting, it looks like you passed your first test with the flying colors! Whatever it was with his phone, you gave him a perfect answer. I’m sure there was lots of "stuff" going on in his head while he was thinking that it was you who messed with his phone. This will be one of the most sensitive subjects, the trust. He is probably thinking that there is no way to overcome the lost trust issue and you always will be suspecting him in something, and this what probably made him grumpy. You proved that this is not the case.


Tori, what a surprise! Glad to “see” you!


M:50
H:52
S28 (my S from previous marriage)
M:17 + 3
BD: 06/12
S: 06/12 - H works in another state
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Busting, just catching up! it will be an interesting follow to say the least!
hugs!


M48 H50
M21 T26
S20 at college),S17,D15-cp, dev. delay- cogniv 5yrs old
PA confirmed 7/2012
H separates 9/2012
H move home 2/13& 7/13 lasted 2weeks.ILYNILWY
OW still in picture. h filed 10/13
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Hi all :-)

Great to hear from you. Tori it's been so long! I hope you are well. Can you message me the name of your book? I really want to read it.

Not much to report except utter confusion.

H wavers between being nice and even attentive to acting with disdain and annoyance towards me. He is quick with anger and within the same day can go from kindness to dismissivness.

What is this?

I KnOW he is confused. He says confusing things. He said he didn't even remember telling me the affair was over....? ( it is). We have had a few conversations and they seem to be constructive. He still is thinking he said about how he envisions moving back home ... I don't even know what that means.

He also holds back so much from me. His wall goes up and done. Sometimes he talks and sometimes he says ' I don't want to tell you how I feel or what I think'. Sometimes there is still some smugness. He was more engaged with me two weeks ago than last week.

We have a big wedding coming up in two days that we have known about for awhile and he is wavering about coming with me or not. I think this is making him distance himself from me because he knows I want him to come with me ( he said that) and he also said he is not 'there' yet.

Maybe that is the root of this recent turbulence....I know he is already confused and full of emotion.

Oh sheesh. Is this the part where I am told that patience is needed? Or am I the one going insane?


TPS
Me: 44 H: 42
M14 T17
S10 D7
10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month
21/04/12 H is 'DONE'
04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010)
July '14 H ends affair
May '15 H moves back home
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Hi I strongly recommend that you re-read TMAK on reconnection - googling it is an easy way to find it. It is written by Job. You may also finds Hearts Blessing good on this stage.

And remember that many here would regard you as fortunate to have this chance, hard as it is. You are a courageous person and will manage.

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Hi Bea- I am so utterly grateful for this chance. I have been praying and praying and thanking God for this chance to reunite my family and I will not let it go. I will remain humble.

Thank you for the suggestion to reread TMAK and HB. I think it may help too. I not sure how to navigate this right now. Thank you Bea. You are very encouraging. I don't feel courageous rather, utterly scared. X


TPS
Me: 44 H: 42
M14 T17
S10 D7
10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month
21/04/12 H is 'DONE'
04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010)
July '14 H ends affair
May '15 H moves back home
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Sounds to me like someone isn't ready yet, Busting. That's ok -- just play it cool. He's back into the "confused" stage, so that's a good sign. PROTECT YOUR HEART!!!


Starsky


M57 W 57; D30 D28 S24 S20 GD7 GD2 GD1 GD5m GD1m
BD 5/07; W's affair 5/07-8/07

At the end of every hard-earned day, people gotta find some reason to believe. (Bruce Springsteen)
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I'm doing my best Starsky to protect my heart. I think I need to really be cool as you said. I admit I was very eager to enter the talks with him as he stated he wanted to do, however he clearly is not ready. My eagerness may have pushed him back and may have disillusioned my stance.

I have been rereadig HB and TMAK as per bea's suggestion and it has helped. Slowed my mind down. I can ' see' better. He is confused and not yet in Acceptance I think. I believe from his behaviours and words he is is reconnecting at a very slow pace. Somewhere between withdrawal and Acceptance. He is so confused.

It's a very awkward situation. We spent almost all year separated and this summer we are together as a family ( with his brothers' family and sister's family) for almost a month. Living together, etc. Seeing him everyday and living together is awkward for me too.

I'll stay my course, my stand, my work and my faith. Keep protecting my heart too. X thanks Starsky x


TPS
Me: 44 H: 42
M14 T17
S10 D7
10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month
21/04/12 H is 'DONE'
04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010)
July '14 H ends affair
May '15 H moves back home
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 6,810
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Any time. You deserve this to turn out RIGHT. smile


M57 W 57; D30 D28 S24 S20 GD7 GD2 GD1 GD5m GD1m
BD 5/07; W's affair 5/07-8/07

At the end of every hard-earned day, people gotta find some reason to believe. (Bruce Springsteen)
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 2,595
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((((((( Starsky)))))))


TPS
Me: 44 H: 42
M14 T17
S10 D7
10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month
21/04/12 H is 'DONE'
04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010)
July '14 H ends affair
May '15 H moves back home
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