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That's good, then twm, I had it. It's not a nice thing to have mastitis.

What's with the whole passion thing?
I don't expect an answer really.

I've had a slight cold, now I have a real large crop of cold sores!

Not fun.


M 46 h54
Both married before
T 11y
Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads!
Ms 18 hs 26
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 786
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twinmom Offline OP
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I wish I knew..... I screamed at him "you don't want to be here and I am so angry with you" and he immediately grabbed me and started with the passion thing.

I so need help controlling my anger. Anyone have any tips/advice on this?


Me: 35 husband:39
Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage
Twins 5 (boy/girl)
Daughter 3
Affair bomb 2/27/14
He moved in with ow 3/13/14
OW kicked him out 6/15/14
4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction



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twinmom Offline OP
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I know mind reading/figuring out what they are thinking is frowned upon here but can anyone help me because it's absolutely driving me bonkers!

During my blow up (I really need help learning to process this anger better because I seem to blow up about every other week) I was yelling at H that I was tired of playing happy family at church and that the life we are living isn't real... the life of come home from work to a lovely dinner, have enjoyable conversation about the day and then family time with the kids. I told him I didn't want him to go to church with us anymore, he said he was Catholic and needed to go anyway (ummmmmmmm sure as he'll are not practicing the faith)

So fast forward to today, I get the kids ready for church and H gets in the car with us. I just gave him a "look" as he knows I won't blow up in front of the kids.

Can someone please give me some insight as to why he "agrees" to move out, to not go anywhere as a family, to not try and kiss me...... and then does it anyway??
He tells me now that when we divorce is up to me, he wants me home with the kids and he tells me now we can keep the marriage for "financial" reasons for as long as I want. But in the same breath he told me he is still holding on to hope that OW will take him back and he has no feelings for me.
So I really don't understand his actions and his words.


Me: 35 husband:39
Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage
Twins 5 (boy/girl)
Daughter 3
Affair bomb 2/27/14
He moved in with ow 3/13/14
OW kicked him out 6/15/14
4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction



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he is manipulating you

that is all

Joined: Mar 2014
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^^ if that is true, it's particularly heinous. You are still post-partum. Hormones still adjusting, sleep deprived.

If he wants to help you financially, would he be willing to hire a mother's helper, or a housekeeper who can give you some relief with the household chores or keeping the toddlers occupied, especially during the early evening/bedtime hours?? I imagine that time of day might be really tough.


Me 38 H 40
D 3
T 8 M 6
BD 10/2013

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twinmom Offline OP
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Claire.... if you haven't read my previous threads, my H has done some pretty f'ed up stuff.... definitely not the man I thought I married, he is very self centered but likes to make sure no one else views him that way.


Me: 35 husband:39
Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage
Twins 5 (boy/girl)
Daughter 3
Affair bomb 2/27/14
He moved in with ow 3/13/14
OW kicked him out 6/15/14
4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction



Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,118
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Yeah so did mine in the last year!

I hope he leaves soon, it will make your life with the kids both tougher and easier.

It will help with the stress levels.


M 46 h54
Both married before
T 11y
Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads!
Ms 18 hs 26
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 786
T
twinmom Offline OP
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Small changes...... tonight instead of having dinner ready at 5:30ish when H usually gets here dinner was ready at 5:15.... so the older boys were done eating and the twins were just finishing up when H walked in. I had cleaned up the kitchen and put all the leftovers away instead of leaving any out for H. I handed H the baby, made my iced tea, and took my spaghetti to the table.

ACTION to show H I didn't make dinner for him.... food is here if he wants to eat but I cook for the kids not him!


Me: 35 husband:39
Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage
Twins 5 (boy/girl)
Daughter 3
Affair bomb 2/27/14
He moved in with ow 3/13/14
OW kicked him out 6/15/14
4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction



Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 1,428
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That's GREAT! smile


Me 38 H 40
D 3
T 8 M 6
BD 10/2013

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Nice job getting creative!


Me42, H40
D12, S8, S7
A revealed: 7/13
Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15

She believed she could, so she did.
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