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Tinman Offline OP
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Yes, at times like these patients can be difficult to handle:-)


M-45
W-44
2D - 11&13
2SS - 11&17
Married 10/10/10
Bomb 3/5/12
Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12
Back together 9/12
Seperated 6/13
Divorce Final 11/13/13
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Posts: 181
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Tinman Offline OP
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Journal Entry - Yesterday turned out to be very eventful. Had the above communications with my W which was nice. I was also feeling pretty good because I had finally resolve summer visitation schedule issues with the ex-w. Sure it only cost me about $2k in parenting coordinator and attorney fees to get her to listen to reason but it was finally done. Now I can relax and just live.
So I get to work and I check the court web site to make sure no surprises with the ongoing custody battle. I almost feel out of my chair. She had gone to a different court house and Judge and filed and received and order of protection against me.
I immediately called my attorney and they forwarded the actual documents to me. So yesterday I was able to spend putting a response together so we can go back to court and object to what she filed. It is so obvious she lied too. She requested the OOP based on two situations. First is she made the claim that one day when I picked the kids up at 9am the kids let me into the home and I stole numerous items from her home. She made the statement in the OOP “The children admitted to CPS and Family Preservation Team that they let him into my house and showed him the hard drive to my new alarm system.” Thankfully I received a complete CPS report (all 136 pages concerning her) and on page 112 it addressed this accusation and said “Mother stated that the family preservation team confronted the girls about allowing Father into the home and the girls stated that they did not allow him into the home”. Busted!!
The second claim was that a few months back I met them at the hospital and I caused a scene. So this issue was not true either and yesterday I went to the hospital and spoke to the guy who took care of us and he actually wrote me a very nice letter stating that I was very polite and I did nothing but show concern for his daughter. Busted again.
What I don’t get is how any judge would have signed off on this pile of lies to begin with. CPS has been providing her services for almost 10 months and they recently substantiated abuse charges against her so I am sure she is acting out of desperation. I should also note that she is has MS and is on all kinds of pain meds that she washes down with an nice red wine and her mind and paranoia are out of control. My kids told me that she installed surveillance cameras inside of her house in every room so she can catch who is coming into the home and stealing all of her narcotics.
So I guess in short having to deal with all this craziness without my wonderful W by my side has really hit home how hard dealing with this is and a big part of why she needed to leave. Right now I really don’t blame her and wish I could leave me too
Next week we start the limited assessment process. People have really started stepping up and seeing what kind of person she is. Gives me great hope that on August 16th the judge will rule in favor or my girls and give me sole custody. At that point maybe W will be able to see that life will calm down and we can be a family again and I can get back to being the man she married, but better.


M-45
W-44
2D - 11&13
2SS - 11&17
Married 10/10/10
Bomb 3/5/12
Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12
Back together 9/12
Seperated 6/13
Divorce Final 11/13/13
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 934
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Please make sure that you preseve the text messages you described above from her, which do not sound like someone who sought a protective order against her spouse.

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Tinman Offline OP
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Sorry for confusion. The text messages were from my current W who is the most kind and considerate and wonderful woman I could imagine. I am currently seperated from my current W and the biggest reason for that is having to deal with my absoulty evil ex-W. I know its confusing and hopefully this helps.


M-45
W-44
2D - 11&13
2SS - 11&17
Married 10/10/10
Bomb 3/5/12
Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12
Back together 9/12
Seperated 6/13
Divorce Final 11/13/13
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 934
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Posts: 934
Sorry - my mistake!

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Tinman Offline OP
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No worries. it is a little confusing for me so I can imagine how it is for someone reading about it. smile


M-45
W-44
2D - 11&13
2SS - 11&17
Married 10/10/10
Bomb 3/5/12
Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12
Back together 9/12
Seperated 6/13
Divorce Final 11/13/13
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 181
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Tinman Offline OP
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I am still learning but now I know I need to hit the respond button
Scaredsilly - Thanks to you too for your comments. It is good to hear from someone who might know her perspective. It is strange to think about all this stuff and realize home much pressure this put on her. A new marriage having to deal with blending kids on both sides, a crazy ex-wife, Custody battle and the financial burden that goes along with that and a husband that put so much in front of her. You are hit the nail on the head with the showing her that she is number one. I think that is the hardest part of this. I want to show her how important she is to me have tried to but at the same time I think instead it has come across as being needy and pushy but then how do I prove that she is "all that" when I don't see her.
We did have a nice time Thursday night. I picked up my girls and when we arrived home they text her to say hello (We only live about 6 houses apart). She came down to say hello and then asked about going out for dinner with her. We had a great time chatting and laughing. I kept it light and after I dropped her off she text me and thanked me for the nice night and she enjoyed being able to laugh. I responded back that I also had a good time and hoped that she enjoyed her weekend.


M-45
W-44
2D - 11&13
2SS - 11&17
Married 10/10/10
Bomb 3/5/12
Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12
Back together 9/12
Seperated 6/13
Divorce Final 11/13/13
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 181
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Tinman Offline OP
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Just learning so bare with me.
Brit45 – Oh my you are good! While it kind of hurts to read some of it, I know it is true. In the past I have gotten so defensive and worried about doing the wrong things, I either put up walls or end up making it about all about me (not meaning to but that’s what I am coming to understand). Really some great points that you have given so thank you very much! I will keep reading and posting and working on myself.
Thanks again for the responses. It is so great to get feedback from others in similar situations.


M-45
W-44
2D - 11&13
2SS - 11&17
Married 10/10/10
Bomb 3/5/12
Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12
Back together 9/12
Seperated 6/13
Divorce Final 11/13/13
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 181
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Tinman Offline OP
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Sure missing my W tonight. Have exchange a few text over last few days but have not spoken since Monday. I know it does no good to think about it but kind of hard not to!


M-45
W-44
2D - 11&13
2SS - 11&17
Married 10/10/10
Bomb 3/5/12
Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12
Back together 9/12
Seperated 6/13
Divorce Final 11/13/13
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 181
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Tinman Offline OP
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Posts: 181
Journal Entry - About ready to give up on this thing. feel a bit like I am talking to myself.
So today I came home a little early so that my Step Son's could come down and join us for dinner. My W spent that last 4 days in Vegas. She had asked yesterday if her boys could come down because she would not be getting home till about 7:30. So make everyone dinner and put a movie on and had a nice evening. Then I went in and cleaned up a bit hoping that I and my girls would get to see her tonight. She called about 7:30 and asked that I send the boys home. I told her that we would walk them home right after they finished dessert. I said that would give the girls and I a chance to say hi. She said that she was really tired but that was fine but it was more how she said it. So that kind of shut me down and I felt like and idiot.
I get I just invited myself down when I should have kept my mouth shut but my girls and I had hoped to see her. I said we would just see her later and would send boys home when the movie was over. She said thanks and that was that.
At least I was able to spend some time with the boys:-)
I never learn when it comes to love:-(


M-45
W-44
2D - 11&13
2SS - 11&17
Married 10/10/10
Bomb 3/5/12
Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12
Back together 9/12
Seperated 6/13
Divorce Final 11/13/13
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