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He noticing he feels it and he diesn't know why you are pulling away.

He is cake eating because having your company validates his thought process that you're good friends better friends than spouses and it's been that way for awhile (that's what I said along with I think it was over a long time ago so we're both okay with it)

I'n glad you said what you said any thing besides me too or yeah

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Thanks Brit, your insight is really valuable to me and I appreciate your continued wisdom over here.

And if you keep responding within 5 minutes of me posting I'm going to have some expectations about response times wink Seriously, some days when I am bored at work it seems like I'm hitting refresh every 3.5 minutes. smile

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hang in there vera - you're doing great!

we're here for you:)

and hit that refresh button all you like - for now. soon all of us will have to stand on our own two feet, but as my IC said to me firmly the other day - for now, it's okay , but not always.

zig


me 46 H 38
M10yrs T 11
S10
BD ow 8/11
h filed 9/25/12


"if i could define enlightenment briefly, i would say it is the quiet acceptance of what is"

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You are doing awesome. Hang in there! Use the concert to your advantage - make him want what he cant have


----
M 39
H 35
D5,D4
M 4
T 9
ILYBNILWY 5/18/11
Left 7/11/11
Divorced 12/1/13

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i love your response "I guess time will tell"

You did not say yes

or no...

you spoke honestly.

way to think on your feet. amazing...


Me(f): 51 W: 41
DP:8 M:3 T:10
"W not happy" 7/11
D final: 8/13
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It's VERY VERY hard for me not to comment on something sometimes. Because I know what's it like to need some reassurance or guidance or just to know someone is listening. I have refreshed a million times at 2 in the morning with tears haha.

But I did go to sleep after that...you can tell poor spelling I was in bed.

And in a weird (selfish) way your sitch with your husband is teaching me about myself. Because I do see a lot of myself in your H and I see a lot of my H's actions in how you're handling it. Although he didn't have DB and he was a lot more needy and didn't separate himself. But he was nice, polite, supportive etc. This sitch is helping me revisit that time and understand more of what I did. I don't know when or how this will help me but I know that it is.

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Zig - that's a good point. I usually try to keep my time here confined to a few times a day so that I can get other things done, and not at all when I'm out GAL smile

Bklyn - thanks, I already have my outfit planned! I'm going to not be in my seat for the opening act, so if he's sitting there wondering where I am, too bad. Unfortunately the tickets are at will call so I have to be there with him to get my ticket.

NG - Thanks. I was just not prepared for the moment so when I said that it sounded really odd in my head, but looking back I guess I didn't admit to anything, which was, as you pointed out, actually honest. I didn't think of it that way, thanks! Better than "I can neither confirm nor deny," I suppose!

Brit - please don't take my comment as me saying you are commenting too much that is not my intention! I welcome all input. I think we all comment on here because we see things in other situations that we might have insight into. We are all here to self-improve and yes the focus is on us (maybe for the first time in a long time) in a new way and while that might be considered selfish it is for a good reason and will (hopefully) ultimately help us better deal with everyone in our lives.

I think I'm going to take a half day from work and hit the gym in the afternoon before tonight.

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ha you can't scare me off that easily! LOL!!

have a good time tonight! Go to the gym so you can have a drink at the show without any guilt! And you'll have that post work out high too!

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hope you have a great time tonight... for YOU! you deserve it, vera!
in the midst of what has to be one of the most challenging times in your life, you have been so very strong and have been using this time to grow. you are an inspiration to me of how to be powerful and not let another define you. Celebrate YOU tonight!


Me(f): 51 W: 41
DP:8 M:3 T:10
"W not happy" 7/11
D final: 8/13
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Hi verba,
I've been away trying to get my own house up for sale (yikes, just 1 more week?!) and your posts about your own house resonated again with me.

I made the decision to put my house up for sale because I didn't like it, h didn't like it, and covering it 100%, while doable, was too tight 45% of my income. Plus this house has been a constant stressor to me in maintenance, cleaning and even dealing with my neighbors (we live too close and everyone knows everyone's business!). Since my h already moved out (and left some belongings behind...) Ive been purging, packing and cleaning. I see he is a bit taken aback that yes, I CAN and will move on.

Having the house or not doesn't mean that you are not self reliant, it means that you are self reliant enough to make those financial decisions. Look, finances change over time... We are not the type of women who sit ideally by and hope and wish for prince charming to come rescue us.. We get up, do what we need to do and take care of business. That is being self reliant. wink
Money is just money... Houses are just places to live.

Sounds like h is starting to connect a bit more with you. I love your dimness and your ability to respond on the fly like that! Nice!


Me& h + S
M: 13 t: 14

H moved 2/12. Own apt 05/12, EAs, PAs, gfriends, oh my!
I'm done. 12/12

"I get knocked down, but I get up again.. you're never gonna keep me down" Chumbawumba
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