Sorry man I know it is though. But u will be fine it will take time to heal your broken heart. I'm still going through it. But keep coming here and talk to us.
Ready for some hard questions? Let us know?
M 53 D 20 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”
MrBond.... the only issue that I am aware of is that I worked way to much to support the family, often times coming home and just dropping from exhaustion, letting the financial pressures of life cause me to neglect my wife... a month after she got a job I stopped working all those hours because be were on top of things, but by then it was to late, a coworker, who makes alot more said and did all the right things to get in her pants....
Me: 37 W:33 S: 2 M: 9/5/09 Suspected: 1/7/12 Confirmed: 2/10/12 Served: 3/29/12 W moved out 3/30/12 First court 5/17/12 HELP!
Get legal advice and divorce her. Seriously stop letting her treat you like a doormat. She is not the woman you married to, stop asking her question's and hoping she'll get better.
I agree with the legal advice.
The rest is victim bullsh!t. Sorry.
You are a doormat of you think you are a doormat.
You will think you are a doormat if you let the actions and/or inaction of your spouse dictate who you are and what you believe.
Or if someone calls you a doormat and you believe it.
She has a right to divorce you. You can't stop that.
When you said your vows did you say "I will love and honor you all the days of my life
Until you behave badly then I will run away"?
I have a different view of what is strong and it comes from making your own choices
Not having them made for you in reaction to what your W is doing right now.
Yes do protect yourself with boundaries economically, legally, fiancially and especially emotionally.
What you must figure out quickly is what you are prepared to do for your M and yourself if you are not assured it can be saved.
What is the answer for you?
Any man can run away and call it courage or not allowing her to treat you whatever way
Real courage is standing your ground regardless of what your W is choosing.
Making YOUR choice. Not one that is made for you.
You decide.
My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am
"I have to choose between protecting my son or preventing divorce.... so I going with my son."
It's all one and the same. First of all, you are going to have to learn to talk to your W because your son is so young. Have the two of you thought of family C for your son?
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
She will do no therapy what so ever... her mother believes there are traumas from her childhood that she does not want brought up... she is not giving me the gift of time... she is steamrolling this as fast as possible...
If I prevent the divorce, then yes one in the same, protecting my rights as a father will upset my wife, I can not afford to lose any more time with him...
Me: 37 W:33 S: 2 M: 9/5/09 Suspected: 1/7/12 Confirmed: 2/10/12 Served: 3/29/12 W moved out 3/30/12 First court 5/17/12 HELP!
I'm not sure on the exact traumas, my counselor says most affairs are from childhood problems.
When she was for she walked in on her father and another woman. I am not sure what else.
Yes it's mostly 50/50, but that's a lot less than what I'm used to I was the primary caregiver.
When I found out, I did everything you're not supposed to beg, plead, pursue. No she is using all of what I've done and try to say I have harrassed her in that she is afraid of me.
She take photos of every scratch or bumps or bruises or whatever my boy does, and she is trying to use that to say I am a bad father...
I am dealing with something much more than a divorce... I need a real plan!
Me: 37 W:33 S: 2 M: 9/5/09 Suspected: 1/7/12 Confirmed: 2/10/12 Served: 3/29/12 W moved out 3/30/12 First court 5/17/12 HELP!
"Yes it's mostly 50/50, but that's a lot less than what I'm used to"
So are you trying to get primary custody? It sounds like she's trying to get primary.
I would ask your MIL what other traumas there were. They could also help in getting your custody case. If possible, go to a IC for yourself and your son. Your W doesn't have to go, but you should learn how to minimize the impact her actions are having.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
