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We are doing an alternating 50/50 parenting schedule, each time I pick my son up it appears as though my life is been crying for hours, I'm not sure if that means anything or not, in court she was stone cold and business like.
Any hope?
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Me: 37 W:33 S: 2 M: 9/5/09 Suspected: 1/7/12 Confirmed: 2/10/12 Served: 3/29/12 W moved out 3/30/12 First court 5/17/12 HELP!
Hey Peringo. Thanks for posting. I think that doing the steps and seeking therapy are good avenues for you to explore. If you are not already doing that. I don't have kids so I can't immagine what that is like, but I feel for you. It sounds like your wife is really angry at something and she is focusing that on you. Whether or not it is deserved, it is unfair for her to treat you that way. I think you are doing the right thing by not being provoked by her actions. Try and remember your self worth. That has been the hardest part for me. You are not a doormat. You are a strong man capable of taking care of yourself. You will soon find that you are capable of finding someone who is caring enough not to do this type of thing to you. Best of luck in your situation.
Registered: 08/11/11
Posts: 2079
Loc: Little Egg NJ
Hi Peringo sorry we missed your post. Post often so u will be out of moderation. Very sorry that you find yourself here but with time you will feel better. I know it is hard to imagine right now but you will.
Have you read DR? Can you afford a DB coach? Someone will post the 37 rules for u soon. I can't on my phone. Take a deep breath and a hold of your thinking. I know it feels like the end of the world but it isn't.
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M 50 W 49 D 16 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 11/12 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
Thanks ty, rick.... the lonliness gets to me at times, combine that with the wifes efforts to make me out to be a bad father, and saying that she is afraid of me... she has done a 180 from the woman I married... so frustrating, the example she is setting for our son. I would love to have my wife back, but I need a strategy to limit my wifes influence over him.
_________________________
Me: 37 W:33 S: 2 M: 9/5/09 Suspected: 1/7/12 Confirmed: 2/10/12 Served: 3/29/12 W moved out 3/30/12 First court 5/17/12 HELP!
Registered: 08/11/11
Posts: 2079
Loc: Little Egg NJ
I know bout the loneliness, rejection, feeling like a monster. U need to GAL. Get a life and don't focus on W. It is a hard concept at first because you don't want to give up what u know And what feels safe. you must take care of your brain and body. I think I aged 20 years since this happened. Focus on you and the kids. You will get sick of the similar responses and statements but after a while u will get it. It is a long road one day u will stand for the M and the next day u will give up. When u feel like u are going crazy come here and tell us. Hang in there buddy.
Ps stop Persuing, reason, begging telling her u love her or reason they don't work.
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M 50 W 49 D 16 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 11/12 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
I have stopped all pursuing, begging, pleading.... virtually no communication, I am trying to focus my attention to counteracting my wifes influence on our son. But yes in the silence of the nite, my mind goes back to the life we had.
_________________________
Me: 37 W:33 S: 2 M: 9/5/09 Suspected: 1/7/12 Confirmed: 2/10/12 Served: 3/29/12 W moved out 3/30/12 First court 5/17/12 HELP!