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[ces67]

Thanks Zig, When I think about how I feel, I came up with the following thought...

I feel that I can give forgiveness fully to my W. But trust will need to be earned.

I'm wrestling around with this thought right now. There's a saying somewhere, I think from the Bible, that says to be "as wise as serpants and as gentle as doves" Or something to that effect. So basically, be kind, be loving, but also be aware and understand what is going on around you.

My W does appear to be working on this now where she has not shown near this effort in teh past 2 years. She and the kids leave today for their 6 week trip. I will see them a week from today as I'm going up to spend a long weekend with them.

My parents will watch the kids next Friday and W and I will go out for the evening and stay the night at a hotel then come back the next day. I'm typically not the best of planners for activities so I'm working to be better at that. I'll find a restaurant for us, reserve the hotel and handle all the arrangements for the evening. I hope to find a place with live music for us to enjoy.

Last night as I was saying "good bye" and good night, W actually leaned in towards me like she was going to kiss me. While she is much kinder to me now, she is still very reluctant to show any affection. I'm sure I looked surprised. I leaned in, kissed her cheek and have her a hug.

I usually leave the house around 6am for work. So before I left, I went upstairs and gave both the kids a kiss & hug goodbye while they were sleeping. (Even at 13 & 10, its still so very touching to watch them sleep).

The door to where my W sleeps was closed so I went back downstairs to put my stuff in the car. Before I left, W was up and gave me a smile and another hug. (She is NOT a morning person so the smile was the big shocker!) I told her I'd see her in a week and took off for work.

On another note, W asked if I'd received any feedback from the fundraising event. In my new job, I'm responsible for the technology used to register participants and I inherited several issues when I took the role. This event was high on people's radar and a smooth running event was very much needed. So it was nice that she remembered me telling her this and asked about it.

I told her that the feedback was positive and that the perception was that things went well. I also told her that I got several comments from co-workers on how attractive my wife is. This made her smile as well.

So on to my bachelor summer. I've got a few weekend trips planned to enjoy myself.