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Joined: Jan 2012
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I hear you nemo. Whenever I see my h. which has been a handful of times is hard. I don't get expectations, but just miss him. He's always very pleasant.

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LAbug,

I think that's what happened tonight, I believe H sent 5 e-mails and a text today, and I didn't write back to any of them. (I didn't even open most of them.)

When H called, I told him how D8 was home sick today and I spent the majority of the day with my Lysol bottle. We also talked about the D8's upcoming visit w/ a pediatric surgeon and not wanting S14 to go white water rafting next month if he still continues to get sick every 2 weeks.

I had cut down to 1 e-mail a day a couple of weeks ago, now I think I will cut back to 0 e-mails a day, unless really necessary (about the kids). So I am feeling a bit more empowered after his call. Never imagined I'd feel like this and how good it feels!!!


Me: 42 H: 44
M: 17 1/2 T: 19 1/2
S: 14
D: 10
D: 8
Dog: 16-17 (very old & H's responsibility, live w/ me)
1st Bomb (I need space): 2/3/12
2nd Bomb (ILYBNILWY): 2/11/12
Moved out: 2/12/12
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 81
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HIW,

Mine is seldom pleasant, usually wants something if he is nice (or that's how H makes me feel).

Right now I'm trying to temper my feelings, because I am worried that I have expectations instead of just being proud of my interaction w/ H.

But, I do miss the "old" H - the one I actually met and married. Is it wrong to wish that this one gets struck by lightning so my wonderful H comes back? wink


Me: 42 H: 44
M: 17 1/2 T: 19 1/2
S: 14
D: 10
D: 8
Dog: 16-17 (very old & H's responsibility, live w/ me)
1st Bomb (I need space): 2/3/12
2nd Bomb (ILYBNILWY): 2/11/12
Moved out: 2/12/12
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 81
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Hi Autumn!

I think I'm going to treat myself to lunch or something after the bloodwork is done. Thanks for putting the thought in my head!!


Me: 42 H: 44
M: 17 1/2 T: 19 1/2
S: 14
D: 10
D: 8
Dog: 16-17 (very old & H's responsibility, live w/ me)
1st Bomb (I need space): 2/3/12
2nd Bomb (ILYBNILWY): 2/11/12
Moved out: 2/12/12
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 81
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Posts: 81
HIW,

A friend of mine actually interviewed at the WTC about 3-6 months before 9-11. She said it was really eery to feel the building actually rock with the wind (and she said it wasn't all that windy on that day). That feeling actually convinced her to take a different job, and boy is she glad she did!

I can't even imagine having to look at the site everyday. I remember when we would drive to LI, it was so odd to not see the Towers anymore, and the smoke just smouldered for weeks. So glad she moved to Astoria!


Me: 42 H: 44
M: 17 1/2 T: 19 1/2
S: 14
D: 10
D: 8
Dog: 16-17 (very old & H's responsibility, live w/ me)
1st Bomb (I need space): 2/3/12
2nd Bomb (ILYBNILWY): 2/11/12
Moved out: 2/12/12
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 285
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Posts: 285
Glad for your friend. We were scheduled to fly in on Sept. 12 for a visit. Obviously postponed and went in October. We walked around the site. So sad and the smell is what I really remember, like electrical fire. Horrible. Striking lightning, why not?

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HOORAY!! D8 seems to have bounced back this morning and is her regular cheerful self!! smile

So, I get to go to my vampire appointment this morning - rats!

HIW - I really love chatting with you! Thanks! smile


Me: 42 H: 44
M: 17 1/2 T: 19 1/2
S: 14
D: 10
D: 8
Dog: 16-17 (very old & H's responsibility, live w/ me)
1st Bomb (I need space): 2/3/12
2nd Bomb (ILYBNILWY): 2/11/12
Moved out: 2/12/12
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 568
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So glad that your D is feeling better this morning. I hope you do get a chance to take yourself to lunch after your appt smile Make it a great day!


-Autumn

Joined: Nov 2011
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Quote:
I had cut down to 1 e-mail a day a couple of weeks ago, now I think I will cut back to 0 e-mails a day, unless really necessary (about the kids).


If that means you were sending one email a day, I would agree. If he wants to know about their daily activities he can ask. It's certainly not your job to keep him informed.

I think we do that initially because it's a carry-over fromt eh marriage days and it keeps us us connected. Really it's pursuit. Be the one in charge of your emotions here and stop the emails. Allow his relationship with his children to be his responsibility.

Hope you have a great day!


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
Joined: Dec 2011
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glad your D is feeling better! it's stressful having sick kids! you just want to snuggle and keep them safe!

i agree w/ La.. limit the emails. i a guilty of slipping over to pursuing territory in the guise of discussing little things about the kids. sometimes that balance is hard to find!

so.. did you go for lunch???


Me:38.. H:33.
Two beautiful kids S:6 D:3
M:8.. together for 11.
Bomb dropped:10/17/11
Separated:11/07/11
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