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Mnky, I give you a hard time but I do like your quiet strength, your sense of humor and your economy of words.


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
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Originally Posted By: purgatory
I always enjoy a visit from the mnky smile


purg, that made me lol!

monkey.. you really bring light to some very dark times. oh! there's that LOTR soundtrack playing again!


Me:38.. H:33.
Two beautiful kids S:6 D:3
M:8.. together for 11.
Bomb dropped:10/17/11
Separated:11/07/11
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Posts: 825
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And 7 strangers set off into a journey unknown.... (que the orchestra)


M-31, H-31
T-9, M-7
S-6, s-20mth
sep 8/1/11
ILYNILWY 11/29/11
Creating separation papers.
Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12
H moves out 1.20.12
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Posts: 524
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Thanks everyone. Friggin love this place!

I tend to be very pragmatic about things almost to the point of over simplification. I know what needs to be done and I set out each day trying to do just that. Humor helps a lot.

One thing that my life as a soldier, pilot, and park ranger has taught me is that life is fleeting. I have literally watched the life slip away from somebody’s eyes and that has had a profound effect on me. Consequently, I try not to sweat the small stuff. When I come on the boards I sometimes have an inner dialogue: “really, you are upset about that? WTF?” So I hold my tongue.

Sometimes I think about this. We do not “need” our spouses. Life will go on. Don’t get me wrong, I love and miss my W and I would be immensely happy if she decided to gives us another chance. I would be there. Then there is the pragmatic side, she made her choice and now I am a happier person overall. Pfft..so who cares what she does. Divorce? Sure what the hell bring it on, I got sh!t to do. (kidding, sort of)

It just seems that some days I come here just so I can keep the emotional wounds festering. Having said that, I still come by so that I can help those that are hurting have a better day. After all, those first few weeks following the bomb are sooo tough. Never want to be there again..


Me: 44
Bomb: 11/27/11
Divorced:6/12
Life goes on: 6/13


Dogs still like bacon...a lot.
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=@@= (ces's new fistbump thingy)


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 825
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Oooooo- I like the fist bump!!

Mnky- it's good to come to the boards even on days *you* don't have anything to post- you never know what tiny bot of info you might get from reading others threads. And b/c of your life experiences, you keep things in perspective, for yourself and others. My dad was a Navy pilot for 18 years (before a back injury grounded him) and he has told me stories about things he's witnessed- those 'life' stories help to keep us focused on what really matters to us- he always told me that he didn't care if he lost his arms and legs in a crash- if he was alive, that was enough to be thankful for.

So even though us LBSers have lost an arm or a leg (our spouse) there's still so much to be thankful for- and we need to be reminded of that. Your approach of "bring it on, I got sh1t to do" is great!!


M-31, H-31
T-9, M-7
S-6, s-20mth
sep 8/1/11
ILYNILWY 11/29/11
Creating separation papers.
Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12
H moves out 1.20.12
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 158
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Originally Posted By: purgatory
Your approach of "bring it on, I got sh1t to do" is great!!


Yes, that is awesome for us newbies, too. It reminds us that there is life outside of our sitchs and that DB is about living life as much as saving our Ms. I was just at my desk wondering if H would come over this weeked to watch movies like he said he would. I read your quote and was jolted out of that fantasy quick -- "Who cares? If he comes, he comes. I have a full weekend ahead!"

Mimi


M:37; H:37; M:10 years;T:13 years;no kids.
Bomb ("I love you, but don't feel things for you I should":1/08/12
Separated (H living with various friends:1/18/12
Separated (H rented his own apartment:3/4/12
Joined: Jan 2012
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Originally Posted By: Grmpy_Mnky

Sometimes I think about this. We do not “need” our spouses. Life will go on. Don’t get me wrong, I love and miss my W and I would be immensely happy if she decided to gives us another chance. I would be there. Then there is the pragmatic side, she made her choice and now I am a happier person overall. Pfft..so who cares what she does. Divorce? Sure what the hell bring it on, I got sh!t to do. (kidding, sort of)

Hey Grmpy, That's one of the most profound set of words I've seen on here man. You are exactly right, and I know you're half kidding but also know you're half not ;-). For me with each passing day I'm kidding a little bit less. My W is starting to real back in a little bit, and I'm going to try to put in a dash off the "don't give a flip" spicerack and see what happens. Keep on keeping on bro, not that I know anything since I can't follow written instructions lol but it seems to me you're doing great!


me 38
W 30
T 3
M in 05/2010
Separated 08/2011
Stephchildren (all hers) SS17, SS12, SD8
I filed 8/27, she countered I filed response 9/5
Anxiously waiting on the judge!
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Flying monkey....i remember your first few one and two word posts to me. You never know who your gonna meet on the boards and the wisdom you will find. Keep posting my friend....you help a lot of people.

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So, Rick and Monkey, I think I am in your situation of LRT and physical separation since 1/31/12 (feels like ages). I reread DR last night/this morning after feeling blue and helpless about my situation. H came over yesterday to fix stuff around the house and I texted him back that I would be gone. Should I have done that. It is DARK here, VERY DARK, and he is living across town. He does text occasionally about bills (colder than a bill collector like you said) and our S16 but otherwise I initiate NOTHING. Is this what you are doing? I feel lost in this After the LRT. I can see nothing moving, nothing changing, maybe a bit nicer since he found out I saw a L but we do not communicate otherwise.

I would walk to LA in a second...trying to GAL and look at my feet and stopping in Vegas whenever y'all are going!

BTW...We lived in Pensacola when H was active duty too and I have fond memories of the Seville Quarter!


Me: 44 H: 45
Married 22
S 18, S 16
Bomb 8/11, Second Bomb 1/12
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