Good start, bad ending huh? She is definitely a piece of work! Of course.....it's all about her and her suffering right? I know a few people like that and they make me crazy!
Glad you had a nice dinner with your sweet lady. She seems like one of a kind for sure!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
D18 says re Voldy "she always wants to do stuff with us but then all she does is complain about it, so why do it then?" and "she's always complaining that she does so much for us and we don't appreciate her" Yes, sounds familiar! You are dead on Mish, it's all about her, always has been and always will be. In all the years I've known her she's never learned to bite her tongue when she's like this, she just lashes out and punishes. She's her own Avenger! To be fair, she has taken the lead in the University stuff and I always tell people how glad I am that she is so driven because I'm not as on top of it as she is. But, if you have an issue with my involvement, then discuss it with me. She knows I am always ready to do what needs to be done. But, again, that's her. The girls didn't allow her to put a dent in their spirits, they just ignore it and carry on. They were singing in the car on the way home lol. As for SDA Lady, she sure is one of a kind and I appreciate who she is more and more each day.
Btw, yesterday SDA Lady also gave me some hand cream and lip baum she'd bought for me. She said "you look after me and I look after you" I told her that I liked the way she personally applied lip baum to my lips, she smiled and said "well, then we'll have to do that more often" lol.
Hmmm.... I knew your ex would get nasty when she knew you were dating someone. Her loss...
Just ignore her and her "more of the same" crap. She doesn't sound like a Happy Camper. Good that your girls can brush her off - but do they really? It does get a bit tiring after a while no doubt.
Do you share regarding University stuff. Neither parent should ever carry all the burden and it IS a lot of work. My ex did squat - I always shouldered it all. And know what that made me to him? A "control freak". Hmmm.... C said that taking charge and being controlling are 2 different things. But regardless - your ex's approach was nasty. She should be spelling out clearly what she would like from you and you should be offering help. Oh - in a perfect world...
Nice that you had dinner out. Sounds like a good date.
Voldy is so anal that she takes over everything and runs the show but then gets upset when she seems to have to run the show! I've always been more than willing to do what needs to be done. She's just annoying as hell, every conversation about university she has with D18 turns into a nasty brawl. Could I be more on top of it, most likely but when someone is annoying as hell you tend to want to stand back a bit lol. Anyway, I've read things over and advised D18 to stop dicking around and accept U of T's offer. Once the offer is accepted then she can apply for OSAP and she's hoping to live in residence and in order to see if this is feasible she needs to see what OSAP will give her. So that's my contribution. What more I need to do is beyond me, I'll check with the Commander and Chief later...once I've handed in my required report lol.
Just to be clear, I have been involved in the process. I do wait for her to tell me what needs to be done or discussed because she's taken the lead on this and has friends who are going through the same process, I don't.
Here's a good one, from the girl who wants to live independently in residence next school year. "Daddy, can start packing me a lunch in the mornings" (I live a block from school so she usually comes home for lunch). I said "you can make your own lunch" her reply "but Daddy I don't have time in the mornings" I said "if you want lunch you will find the time" D says "then couldn't you just give me lunch money instead" me "no, you want lunch, you make it. Try making it the night before" D18 "but it will be soggy" Now she's pissed at me 'cuz I won't get up early to make her lunch. Hey, now she has something in common with her Mom lol!
My kids had to make their lunches the night before. Sometimes they would make the sandwich part in the morning so it would taste better(like pb and J. My kids did this from 1st grade on. Now the three younger ones are willing to try hot lunch at school. they have always been really picky, so I figure this helps them try some different things. lol
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I worked evenings - often got home after 10 (after putting in a full day with 3 kids in school). My ex was in charge of making school lunches - sometimes in the morning, sometimes the night before. When he left - I felt like the lunch making would be the straw that broke the camel's back - even though it was only for Ashley at that point. So I asked her to make her own lunch (she was 12). She said she could handle it as long as I always kept lots of lunch foods on hand. Which I did. And we never had a problem with uneaten lunches - she made healthy choices and it may have been one of the reasons she ended up studying nutrition.
It's important to learn how to take care of yourself in all aspects. She is not too young for that.
She just tried again! "If I have to get up any earlier I'll just die" Uh, yeah OK. She then said "Mommy would do it!" Nice try kid. I said "Hey, how be you grab a bagel, slap on some ham and presto you got a sandwich!" She even tried "just tomorrow then"... Nope.
