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#2211117 - 01/07/12 10:08 PM The Power of Prayer
2thepoint Offline
Member

Registered: 09/30/11
Posts: 1692
Matthew 11:28 - Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden , and I will give you rest.

I thought I'd take a moment to start a thread to encourage everyone who is laboring under the strain and heavy burden of a pending divorce to seek the power of prayer. I have found great comfort in praying AND seeking prayer for our families, our children, our WAS's and our own emotional well being.

In our moments of greatest need, know that God is watching over each of us and will show us the way forward.

God Bless!
_________________________
Me48 W50 S15 S11
M20 T23
Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11

It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.

Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife

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#2211155 - 01/08/12 08:44 AM Re: The Power of Prayer [Re: 2thepoint]
antlers Offline
Member

Registered: 03/28/09
Posts: 3041
I don't know...I've felt like I was just talking to the sky many times over the past 3 years...I didn't feel like there was anybody on the other end of the line. He says "you'll seek me and find me when you search for me with all your heart"...I sought Him pretty hard...still felt like I was alone.
_________________________
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.

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#2211189 - 01/08/12 01:40 PM Re: The Power of Prayer [Re: antlers]
2thepoint Offline
Member

Registered: 09/30/11
Posts: 1692
Antlers, I hear what you are saying. But as we know, prayer is all a matter of faith. Faith that He hears us when we cry out for Him, faith that He will show us the way, faith that He will answer our prayers.

I sometimes think that what we want and what He wants for us are often very different. For example, during those times of deep despair when you cried out for His guidance, maybe you were expecting an immediate solution to magically appear before your eyes. But instead, maybe what you got and didn't realize at the time was the ability to see things a little more clearly which allowed you to move ahead more confidently. Maybe during your time of anguish when all seemed lost and hopeless, you found the strength to carry on. Maybe when you felt absolutely alone and and the end of your rope, you paused just for a second...and that second was all that was needed to move you down a different path.

Many years ago I was driving down a street and was stopped behind another car at a stop light waiting to cross a very busy 6 lane state highway where the speed limit was 55 mph. The car in front of me had an automatic transmission and the car I was driving had a manual transmission. How do I know this? I know this because on that day I almost died!

When the light turned green the car in front of me began to cross the intersection and I followed right behind keeping a steady pace with the car in front. However, when it came time for me to shift into 2nd gear the car in front with the automatic transmission pulled farther ahead and widened the gap..... just enough to let a car that had run the red light at 60 mph pass in between our two cars.

Had I been driving a car with an automatic transmission, there would have been no gap wide enough for the car that ran the red light to pass between us. One of us would most certainly been killed. And it would most likely have been me.

Now I don't share that story because I necessarily believed that there was some sort of divine intervention (although I suppose the possibility exists). Instead I tell you this to illustrate the point that when you take time to pray, you are pausing and thinking and reflecting and maybe giving yourself a little more time, a little more space to see things more clearly. And in so doing, perhaps God is working in you in ways that are not readily seen.

Maybe after some of your prayers, you shifted your thinking ever so slightly and that shift allowed you to move more confidently or slowed down your progression on a destructive path that was wrong for you. We may never know. But, you did say that you felt like you were just talking to the sky "many times over the past 3 years."

The fact that you continued to pray "many times over 3 years" says something about your faith. Don't you think?
_________________________
Me48 W50 S15 S11
M20 T23
Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11

It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.

Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife

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#2212302 - 01/12/12 03:32 PM Re: The Power of Prayer [Re: 2thepoint]
antlers Offline
Member

Registered: 03/28/09
Posts: 3041
Originally Posted By: 2thepoint
The fact that you continued to pray "many times over 3 years" says something about your faith. Don't you think?

I think it says something about me wanting some help....from God. And being persistent in wanting that help!
_________________________
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.

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#2212590 - 01/13/12 04:29 PM Re: The Power of Prayer [Re: antlers]
2thepoint Offline
Member

Registered: 09/30/11
Posts: 1692
I know it is a constant struggle. I hope you were able to eventually find the help you were looking for. At least some peace of mind?
_________________________
Me48 W50 S15 S11
M20 T23
Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11

It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.

Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife

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#2212596 - 01/13/12 05:03 PM Re: The Power of Prayer [Re: 2thepoint]
antlers Offline
Member

Registered: 03/28/09
Posts: 3041
Originally Posted By: 2thepoint
I know it is a constant struggle. I hope you were able to eventually find the help you were looking for. At least some peace of mind?

Hard to say. Felt awful alone most of the time I was prayin'....like I was just talking to myself. I believed otherwise though...despite that. I do believe that God has forgiven me long ago for the mistakes that I made with my former wife and kids, and I accepted that forgiveness. It took me much longer (about 3 years) to forgive myself...and accept that forgiveness. But I did. Recently though, I asked God to help me forgive her for the pain that she had caused me...and I forgave her. I did do that. Huge step!
It would have been nice though...if He had seen fit to help me save my marriage, and help me prevent my kids from being hurt like they were from the separation and divorce, and to help me ease my exW's pain...instead of everybody being hurt as bad as we all were.
_________________________
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.

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#2212655 - 01/13/12 09:26 PM Re: The Power of Prayer [Re: antlers]
2thepoint Offline
Member

Registered: 09/30/11
Posts: 1692
I suppose we will never know what the master plan is for each of us. Sometimes I think that we must endure much pain and suffering in order to become who we were meant to be.

I haven't arrived yet where you eventually landed, though my pain is pretty intense as well. But, if you were able to get out of the sitch, the ability to forgive and be forgiven, then perhaps that is a blessing, small as it may seem.

How is your R with your ex and your children? Is it better now than it was when you D? I'm sure being able to forgive is or has had an impact, yes?
_________________________
Me48 W50 S15 S11
M20 T23
Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11

It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.

Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife

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#2212679 - 01/13/12 11:59 PM Re: The Power of Prayer [Re: 2thepoint]
antlers Offline
Member

Registered: 03/28/09
Posts: 3041
Originally Posted By: 2thepoint

1. Sometimes I think that we must endure much pain and suffering in order to become who we were meant to be.
2. How is your R with your ex and your children? Is it better now than it was when you D? I'm sure being able to forgive is or has had an impact, yes?

1. Why?
2. Our separation and divorce was very mean and nasty. The relationship between she and I was mean and nasty up until about last February. Then we laughed and joked with each other for 8 months...until she got involved with her new soulmate. Now it's back to bad between us. My children have suffered and are torn. Relationships are on again, off again. Forgiving her has been good for me...regardless. It's only been a couple of weeks though. Unknown about other effects right now.
_________________________
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.

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#2212687 - 01/14/12 01:19 AM Re: The Power of Prayer [Re: antlers]
2thepoint Offline
Member

Registered: 09/30/11
Posts: 1692
Originally Posted By: antlers
Originally Posted By: 2thepoint

1. Sometimes I think that we must endure much pain and suffering in order to become who we were meant to be.
2. How is your R with your ex and your children? Is it better now than it was when you D? I'm sure being able to forgive is or has had an impact, yes?

1. Why?


Maybe it is best to use myself as an example to answer your question.

When I was younger, before I met/married my W, I was an earnest, responsible, loving and very kind hearted person. But over the years I have become angry, critical, selfish, controlling, depressed, etc. I haven't yet figured out why all these things surfaced during my M but I am working hard to understand and correct it.

Since my W dropped the bomb, I have experienced the most intense emotional pain, the likes of which I have never felt before. If there is such a thing as a broken heart, I think I would be a prime example.

The person I was when I was younger is not the person I am today. But, the person I once was, I believe is the person who I was meant to be. Somehow I lost my way, and so it seems to me that in order to rediscover the old me and make that a part of my life again, I had to experience the pain and suffering of my Sitch.

If my W hadn't dumped me, I would most likely not have rediscovered God in my life. I would not be focusing on strengthening my relationship with my children. I would not be working with a T on my anger issues and depression.

So through these trials and tribulations, I am growing and I am discovering what I had lost and that I believe is the person who I was meant to be.

It may not make sense to you, but it seems to make sense to me.

=============================

One thing slightly off the topic of this post but related to the title of this thread is that I have been out of work for a long time. I was a mid-level executive who made very good $$ until I was laid off back in 2008. Between then and now I spent a year doing some consulting work but hated every minute of it. I have a small real estate investing business but it does not generate enough $$ for me to live on by myself as this sitch is forcing me to do.

Finding suitable work in this economy without forcing yet another relocation on my family has been near impossible! And so I pray, every day. And when I attend church services on Sunday, I seek prayer from others in the congregation.

In November, just before Thanksgiving I had what I thought was a very promising interview. I was told by the hiring manager that I would be a contender, that I was more qualified for the posted position than I realized, etc. All good stuff!

Yet here we are 2 months later and nothing! So I continue to pray.

Then last night I had a dream about that November job interview and in the dream people were sitting around a table and going through what appeared to be some sort of selection process. I wasn't faring well and then I woke up and didn't give it another thought.

Tonight, as I was checking email I discovered a message in my in box from the recruiter for the company I interviewed with and dreamed about last night. Before opening the message I was convinced that it was my official denial notice. You know, thanks but no thanks!

But... it wasn't! They would like to see me for a 2nd and final interview and to complete some assessments. I can't not believe that God had a hand in this. He must have! And so I am thankful and remain prayerful for a good outcome.

Which brings me back to the topic of this thread, The Power of Prayer. I believe there is something there and that is why I stand by my prior post about how it manifests in our lives.

BTW - I'm really sorry you experienced such a difficult D. I sincerely hope and pray that you are able to find peace in your life. And, thanks for your posts on this thread. I've enjoyed the dialogue.
_________________________
Me48 W50 S15 S11
M20 T23
Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11

It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.

Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife

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#2212694 - 01/14/12 06:41 AM Re: The Power of Prayer [Re: 2thepoint]
antlers Offline
Member

Registered: 03/28/09
Posts: 3041
Originally Posted By: 2thepoint
Since my W dropped the bomb, I have experienced the most intense emotional pain, the likes of which I have never felt before. If there is such a thing as a broken heart, I think I would be a prime example.

Those words are as accurate a description for me as they are for you.
I was already in the process...I'd alteady started, making the changes that I needed to before she lowered the boom on me. My mind was right and I was committed. He knows it and so do I. It would have been nice if I'd been able to 'molt' without losing all that I did. There was no good in it (separation and divorce)...it was all bad. I'm a better man, dad, and I believe partner, than I've ever been. But I was on my way to that before I lost all that I did. So...seemed all so unnecessary.
_________________________
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.

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