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#2200893 - 11/24/11 01:19 AM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: sandycay]
kml Offline
Member

Registered: 01/18/03
Posts: 12053
I am sure they will test her for Celiac disease, but be aware that the standard tests will not reveal more subtle cases of gluten sensitivity. You can go to Life Extension (www.lef.org) and order a blood test for food sensitivites that is an IgG panel that looks at like 90 different foods - I find that kind of test helpful in identifying subtle gluten issues and other food sensitivities.

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#2220694 - 02/10/12 06:25 PM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: kml]
sandycay Offline
Member

Registered: 01/31/08
Posts: 1049
Loc: Pacific Northwest (WA)
Thanks KML, I'll look into that. I have taken her to another Ped. gastro Dr. as the one we were seeing post hospital just didn't make sense in diagnosing things and randomly changed his treatment of her when I ask questions about it. He just didn't leave me feeling good or clear. I have taken her to Seattle Childrens and met with a wonderful gastro there. We are still on the hunt.

Since the last update, FEG took me to meet the parents in December. While in Boise, we were aimlessly wondering the streets and he pointed me into a jewelry store which I thought was just odd. But I got into a conversation with the guy working there because I had some of my mom's jewelry on and it's quite old and remarkable...he was offering to clean them etc. FEG was picking up different stuff asking do you like this...while it was an engagement ring but I thought "why would you be asking me that...you haven't ask me to marry you" so I just assumed it was casual conversation and offered my opinion on various rings etc. He brought it up later that I was clueless. LOL

We get back home and he informs me he needs to buy a house as his taxes are eating him up and since the D he has been renting. We live about 40 min from each other right now and at the beginning of relationship he said he would consider moving closer to me until my D finishes HS. We both know we don't want to live in the community that I currently live in.

So, I am a bit disappointed that for the next 3 years we will live apart. I understand his financial needs and in the long run it will be the best financial decision for us both. He also told me that he wanted me to be a part in the decision making process and that if he says "I" in any of this that he really means "we". He has the habit of doing this so sometimes I don't know if it is a we thing or an I thing..so he wanted to be clear on that issue. He also took one of my moms rings that I have stated that I would love to be redone and be my wedding ring at some point as it's a beautiful old European Diamond, platinum ring but the style of ring is not one for me. So we made it through Christmas and NE with no proposal..I kinda expected that for Christmas as I think that it around his proposal/wedding date for his ex.

Nothing has been said since. He just signed the documents for building a new home to be ready in July. Now, he will be an hour away. UGH on that. I can't do anything to help on the home at this time as my house is currently up for sell and if something goes wrong and I have to lose the house (I don't see that happening but) we don't want it tied to the other house. He has mentioned us being on the home together....etc.

I have two more classes to complete and then I will be placed on a waiting list for my program to begin next February which will take a year and half to complete. I am very excited about that. I will graduate just shy of my alimony running out. I had to let go of the nursing school issue as none of the ones that were available were close enough to where I live and since the EXH is not a parent in any way shape or form I have to be closer to my kids. I am now going in Occupational Therapy field. I am tickled pink over this ability...I just hope I get accepted!

The boy has been accepted into every college he applied to so now it's just a money game. I may have to take petition EXH to help pay for secondary education.

As soon as the house sells and I can rent I am turning him over to the DCS as he owes me $1000's of dollar for the uninsured medical expenses which he has decided (although it's part of the court order) he doesn't have to pay. He also pays late and that screws up my bills. But I have to be able to turn what money he does give me over to them and then they pay me,...hence the need to float myself for a month...while they get all that spelled out.

He wanted to pay my directly because his pay is never the same nor on the same schedule...so I agreed to it...and for a year and half he paid on time...now he gets later and later every month. I simply have asked him in the past to please let me know ahead of time and I can plan my bills differently for the month but for the last 6 months every month I'm on pins and needles waiting for the money...he sends in increments as he can only transfer so much on a given day. So, I asked him yesterday when he planned on giving me the final payment of the month and he says not till next week....uumm yea mortgage is due no later than the 15th!!! UGH

So, that's all that has been going on in my world.
_________________________
M:47
M:18
D16, S19
1st S 1/08-5/08
Reconciled/May 7, 2008
Left again Nov 9, 2009
I Filed: Nov 17, 2009
Final: April 14, 2010
EX walked away from kids too




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#2220762 - 02/10/12 10:05 PM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: sandycay]
kat727 Offline
Member

Registered: 03/25/08
Posts: 9993
Loc: Kansas
Valentines in just next week my dear! LOL I don't think there is any question that he is asking just be sure to take in the clues when he does because I don't think he the type that hit's you over the head with stuff.

Glad to hear that all is going well for you. kat
_________________________
M-50(and fabulous!)
S22, S19, D15, D14
Don't judge every day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant. Robert Louis Stevenson

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#2221098 - 02/12/12 12:54 AM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: kat727]
sandycay Offline
Member

Registered: 01/31/08
Posts: 1049
Loc: Pacific Northwest (WA)
Kat~He does not like Valentines Day so it would be a surprise if he did that. He has never given me flowers in a year but does send me cards by snail mail every so often which I love!!

Plus I know he would ask my kids first and they aren't acting weird LOL

AND my Bestie ask me the other day would I say Yes and my first thought was "yes, of course" but then when I really started thinking about it I felt sick to my stomach! Weird!!!!
_________________________
M:47
M:18
D16, S19
1st S 1/08-5/08
Reconciled/May 7, 2008
Left again Nov 9, 2009
I Filed: Nov 17, 2009
Final: April 14, 2010
EX walked away from kids too




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#2223092 - 02/17/12 10:27 PM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: sandycay]
kat727 Offline
Member

Registered: 03/25/08
Posts: 9993
Loc: Kansas
Any ring yet? President's day is right around the corner since he isn't a V-day fan. smile

kat
_________________________
M-50(and fabulous!)
S22, S19, D15, D14
Don't judge every day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant. Robert Louis Stevenson

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#2239376 - 04/20/12 02:36 AM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: kat727]
sandycay Offline
Member

Registered: 01/31/08
Posts: 1049
Loc: Pacific Northwest (WA)
Kat ~ no ring yet!!


So, I have finally sold the marital home that I have been stuck paying for, for the last 2 years !!! YAY! Bitter sweet and it makes me angry that I am having to sell off half my life to downsize but only for a minute and that's really only because it's a pain the a$$ to move.

I am finally petitioning the court for Post secondary support, meeting with attorney tomorrow and I am turning ex over to DCS tomorrow.

My new attorney put the smack down on me for letting EX bully me over money these past few years. Perfect time because I am moving and he won't know where I live. I am not sure what he is going to do but I'm sure it won't be pretty!!!

FedEX guy and I are still moving along. Thank god his "language of love" is acts of service LOL He's really loved me a lot getting the house ready etc.

We've both been crazy busy and have been putting the relationship on the back burner, still spending the same amount of time together...just not much chilling and recharging time spent together. We had a talk about keeping that in check because the distance we live apart..that won't keep for a good relationship.

Just finished mid-terms this week and finals week is same as closing week. This kids and I have moved most of the attic contents and the guest bedroom stuff to the new house....11 days till the movers come.

Funny story ~ Septic guy was here because you have to pump it prior to a sell....and I sign and date the paper....funny thing is it dawned on me it would have been my big 21st anniversary today. Coincidence that the pooper got dumped? I think not! I just kinda chuckled about it.

So nice to not mourn that anymore...it's so weird...it seems like that part of my life is a dream and very distant memory. I've even began telling kids of funny things about their dad and I or things he did with them. My daughter found her 2nd grade journal and we read all together and it just reaffirmed that we did indeed have a great life then. The ability to laugh until we cried about affirmed the great life we have now...inspite of all the difficulties we go through still. Bless her heart every journal entry started with I HAD THE BEST WEEKEND!!!
_________________________
M:47
M:18
D16, S19
1st S 1/08-5/08
Reconciled/May 7, 2008
Left again Nov 9, 2009
I Filed: Nov 17, 2009
Final: April 14, 2010
EX walked away from kids too




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#2239435 - 04/20/12 11:55 AM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: sandycay]
kat727 Offline
Member

Registered: 03/25/08
Posts: 9993
Loc: Kansas
Darn! I was so sure it would be Presidents Day! No rush though right? I think moving will be good for a fresh start. Are you renting in case?

Hope you get everything straightened out with the ex via the court. What a hoot about the septic tank! Sounds fitting. Keep on trucking. Sounds like things are going well otherwise. Keep making time for each other. smile

Hugs, kat
_________________________
M-50(and fabulous!)
S22, S19, D15, D14
Don't judge every day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant. Robert Louis Stevenson

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#2239437 - 04/20/12 12:00 PM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: sandycay]
SunFunOne Offline
Member

Registered: 05/18/09
Posts: 2451
Hey Sandy,

Good luck with the move. I sold 2 homes and bought 2 in the past year and half. Moving, moving, moving - I should be a Pro by now. It is NOT easy. Or Fun but the results are wonderful.

I sold the marital home after hanging onto it for 5 years on my own. It was very freeing. The fresh start is wonderful. Good for you AND the kids. Now I've moved to my dream location on a lake with new man although we still do the long distance thing as he works in the city Sun to Thurs. Hang in there. Fed Ex guy sounds good for you and the long distance thing can and does work!

And hold on tight to the memories. Many of them Were good. Deny them and you deny your kids' childhood. I'm still working on this part. Hope to watch home movies again someday soon.

Great story and I'm happy for you!

Barb

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#2274271 - 08/23/12 06:09 PM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: SunFunOne]
sandycay Offline
Member

Registered: 01/31/08
Posts: 1049
Loc: Pacific Northwest (WA)
WEll FED-Ex Guy PROPOSED Tuesday and I said Yes! The house he is building is finished....got my boy graduated and he will be heading to college soon and got Fed-ex guy's daughter married. I'm settling into my downsize rental finally! It's been a busy summer!!

I guess we should keep it on the down low due to the court issue is not resolved and not that it matters legally but poking an angry bear is dumb. Or do I just say forget it and make it FB official? LOL

I am still friends with most of Ex's family on FB so the new will travel quickly and I am sure he will hope I will do it sooner rather than later because of the spousal support but I vowed to wait until my kids were done with high school to remarry anyone and that's my intent and has nothing to do with spousal but I am sure he will see it that way.

My daughter wrote her dad in July that she no longer wishes to see him. frown This make me incredibly sad and yet who does he blame? ME

I am so sick of him blaming me for his poor relationship with our children and it makes me angry that he doesn't try to fix it but just blames them and me for that. Maybe he should look at himself but that's not the case UGH!!
_________________________
M:47
M:18
D16, S19
1st S 1/08-5/08
Reconciled/May 7, 2008
Left again Nov 9, 2009
I Filed: Nov 17, 2009
Final: April 14, 2010
EX walked away from kids too




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#2274276 - 08/23/12 06:35 PM Re: I've only just begun! [Re: sandycay]
mishka422 Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/07
Posts: 9692
Loc: GA
YEA!!!!!!! Congrats and best wishes Sandy!

I agree, you should probably keep it quiet for now. No sense is stirring up the crazy any further. LOL

I'm very sorry to hear about your daughter's letter to her dad. That has to be so heartbreaking even knowing how he disregards her. frown

Where is your son going to college? I know you said he had gotten into all of the ones he applied to. Is he staying close to home?
_________________________
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43
bomb12/4/07
PA5/07
S12/26/07
D final 11/17/08
Back together with no defined R 05/2010
confused....to say the least!!!


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