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#2202890 - 12/02/11 09:53 PM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: verycrazy]
dolphin Offline
Member

Registered: 06/20/10
Posts: 82
No its not the tatoos or the black leather. he watched and listened 10 hrs a day on satelite radio to howard stern for 5 yrs, and on tv for 25 yrs, stern treats woman like sex objects and h favorite show was 2 and a half men . i dont know maybe i couldnt live with that. he listend to heavy metal music about satan and his favorite song was "f--- like a beast" i think what people watch and listen to is a reflection of there values and morals and maybe it wouldnt work. i know im rehashing the same stuff. i have to take action.
I was out raking leaves before and i felt very empowered to just accept that its over and son and i will b ok if we d, and to get my son and i fair share to live on. maybe sell our house and buy a small house in the country with lots of wild life around, i always wanted that. i dont know if i could live with h and always be wondering where he was, and i have read that if someones h or boyfriend is sleeping around it can cause woman to get cervical cancer.

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#2202891 - 12/02/11 09:54 PM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: dolphin]
dolphin Offline
Member

Registered: 06/20/10
Posts: 82
I am sorry i text h and said i was sorry for mistakes, and other stuff it was to much persuing behavior and i do have my pride.

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#2202895 - 12/02/11 10:08 PM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: dolphin]
MrBond Offline
Member

Registered: 06/18/08
Posts: 11072
I don't think you even noticed that this is why you never even had a chance to get together with your H. You haven't changed. This is the same complaints you've had about him from day one.

There's a difference between doing something that damages your pride, and doing something because you believe it could be a change for the better. Again it's not just towards your H. You've acted like that towards others so it's ingrained into your personality. Non-acceptance is not a good trait to have.

And anyhow, your H will always be in your life whether you like it or not. You share a son together with whom (from what I can see) you don't co-parent at all.

You can't be telling him one thing and your H another. At the very least you should start talking to your H about co-parenting and not just why you don't want your H to teach your son something.

What if your son wants to end up just like his dad? What if the OW is treating your son better than you are at least in his eyes?
_________________________
M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

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#2202896 - 12/02/11 10:09 PM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: MrBond]
MrBond Offline
Member

Registered: 06/18/08
Posts: 11072
BTW, I like that song and watch those shows and know dozens of others who do. Our morals are intact.
_________________________
M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

Top
#2202905 - 12/02/11 10:57 PM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: MrBond]
dolphin Offline
Member

Registered: 06/20/10
Posts: 82
good for you if you like that trash music, ,to each his own. S does not want to be like his father. he listens to classical music which he loves, and he knows the difference between right and wrong. No matter what your spouse does you dont commit adultery. Good for you that your morals are intact. my son doesnt like the ow either, he doesnt want to even be around her. he is almost 18 he doesnt want to be with them.

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#2202906 - 12/02/11 10:58 PM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: dolphin]
dolphin Offline
Member

Registered: 06/20/10
Posts: 82

If you are angry about something today go take it out on someone else, or go for a long run.

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#2202908 - 12/02/11 11:00 PM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: dolphin]
dolphin Offline
Member

Registered: 06/20/10
Posts: 82
I have taken alot of psychology classes and what you put into your head constantly is what you become. Why play with fire, thats stupid.

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#2202909 - 12/02/11 11:01 PM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: dolphin]
dolphin Offline
Member

Registered: 06/20/10
Posts: 82
I dont think you have changed. maybe you were critical of your wife thats what she didnt like

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#2202915 - 12/02/11 11:59 PM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: dolphin]
MrBond Offline
Member

Registered: 06/18/08
Posts: 11072
Au contraire. I'm not critical of my W. I play classical piano and hold two degrees. I have also minored in Psych and have been reading and studying all about marriage/mlc/psych since my sitch began.

The point is that what you put in your head doesn't define how you turn out in life. As a W it's up to you to accept your H as much as you expect him to accept you the way you are. Regardless of whatever relationship you're in, even the ones with your son, you have to accept them for the way they are.

Acceptance has been your problem so far. You wouldn't want him to tell you to change would you?
_________________________
M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

Top
#2202925 - 12/03/11 01:14 AM Re: H took my son to buy me a gift [Re: MrBond]
MrBond Offline
Member

Registered: 06/18/08
Posts: 11072
BTW, it was reading about marriage and psychology that helped me to accept my W how she is. It's something that is learned. It has helped me in so many more of my relationships and not just the ones with my W.

As a matter of fact, it has made me love my W even more because now I love her for her differences and the things that make her unique. If you believe in God, well, you know he made each person one of a kind. Treat and respect it as such.
_________________________
M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

Top
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