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#2166093 - 07/06/11 01:16 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: Jack_Three_Beans]
Harrier Offline
Member

Registered: 11/11/10
Posts: 781
Loc: Connecticut
My coach used to say every day is an opportunity. Same here

Dont worry jtb. I still think you are peaches.

I need to update things with me.
_________________________
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.
--Jean Jacques Rousseau.

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#2166098 - 07/06/11 01:27 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: Harrier]
XYZ Offline
Member

Registered: 10/06/10
Posts: 391
Loc: Cumming, GA
The smart a$$ version of me wants to say that the skill I'm the best at (in my head!) is the one I'm not allowed to practice right now.....wink wink.

The non-smart a$$ version gets what you're saying...

Continued improved communication with W. It's the little things: I send her an email about totally admin things. I start it with "hi", she replies "Hi Yourself! Thanks...blah etc." Nothing really there, but the whole "Hi Yourself!" tone was missing for so long....
_________________________
M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11

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#2166128 - 07/06/11 02:23 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: XYZ]
Harrier Offline
Member

Registered: 11/11/10
Posts: 781
Loc: Connecticut
We all know how JTB feels about smart asses. ;-)
_________________________
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.
--Jean Jacques Rousseau.

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#2166152 - 07/06/11 03:17 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: Harrier]
XYZ Offline
Member

Registered: 10/06/10
Posts: 391
Loc: Cumming, GA
He loves to see them in the mirror?
_________________________
M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11

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#2166155 - 07/06/11 03:29 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: XYZ]
XYZ Offline
Member

Registered: 10/06/10
Posts: 391
Loc: Cumming, GA
Wanna know something that just hit me? I posted that joke a moment ago (BTW, J3B - was kidding, meant no offense). Also realized that Harrier made a comment a few posts back about me being funny. But here's the kicker, for a long time I haven't been funny, but in the last little while (week, 2 weeks?), I feel like me again. I can joke. I can be fun. I don't have to mope and cry and wine. I feel like ME. I've been gone for almost a year and I feel like I'm back. Damn, that's cool. And my sitch is improving. Coincidence? Chicken or egg?
_________________________
M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11

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#2166157 - 07/06/11 03:37 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: XYZ]
Jack_Three_Beans Offline
Moderator

Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 11333
Guys its highly unlikely that you can offend me. Not saying that as some sort of challenge.

If you say something that isn't true, It won't bother me.

If you say something that is true and upsets me? I'd need to figure out why and fix it.

I am glad that you found your sense of humor again, its usually the first thing to get shot off in the war.
_________________________

Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis

Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans

Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK

TRUST THE PROCESS - Cadet


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#2166370 - 07/07/11 01:01 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: Jack_Three_Beans]
XYZ Offline
Member

Registered: 10/06/10
Posts: 391
Loc: Cumming, GA
Tough day for me today. I'm feeling pretty down. On the one hand, I look at the last two weeks and see such an incredible improvement over before that. On the other, all I have are words and very little by way of action; she still has not scheduled that therapy appointment and I have not yet said anything (I'm planning to on Tuesday if it's not done by then).

I find myself thinking: if before I didn't believe anything she said then why should I now just because she's saying what I want her to say? I guess there have been some small actions (a dinner invite, 1 ILY first, nice conversations), and I need to see that they may seem small to me but not to her. I need to get my mind wrapped around the slow nature of this. Still struggling with that.

The waiting is the worst.
_________________________
M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11

Top
#2166378 - 07/07/11 01:32 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: XYZ]
Jack_Three_Beans Offline
Moderator

Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 11333
Dear God, please give XYZ Patience; right the heck now! Amen.
_________________________

Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis

Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans

Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK

TRUST THE PROCESS - Cadet


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#2166382 - 07/07/11 01:44 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: Jack_Three_Beans]
Harrier Offline
Member

Registered: 11/11/10
Posts: 781
Loc: Connecticut
The waiting is the hardest part
Every day you get one more yard
You take it on faith, you take it to the heart
The waiting is the hardest part.


X I know what you mean.

Must be something in the air today (at least in the east) I'm having a down day today too. I know what it's like. My W said she was going to see an IC to help her get through some stuff in regards to me. She still hasn't made the damn appointment.

Remember the time table gets thrown out the window. But a question. What are you looking for (beside the MC appt)?
Why are you looking for it and what will it mean?

I believe there is enough from you posts to say that she is doing some action, (maybe not the action you want).

I think it's also okay to be down sometimes. (JTB Winnie the Pooh would NOT be the same without Eeyore)

My W went about 10 weeks or so after she wanted to work on things before she started some regular physical contact- hugs, kisses, etc. Earlier this year. It's only been 2 for you.

You know all this jazz. Taking it slow also prepares you for he bumps ahead.
_________________________
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.
--Jean Jacques Rousseau.

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#2166384 - 07/07/11 01:49 PM Re: XYZ is here, and it looks like I'm staying... [Re: Jack_Three_Beans]
XYZ Offline
Member

Registered: 10/06/10
Posts: 391
Loc: Cumming, GA
Originally Posted By: Jack_Three_Beans
Dear God, please give XYZ Patience; right the heck now! Amen.


Didn't work. I'm not patient yet. Try again, Jack. smile
_________________________
M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11

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