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You guys crack me up! Love the cat story.

Empathetic my foot. Hope you learn your lesson about kissing a ladies *ss!

Lesson for me too.... altho' I think men are more gullible to it. Its your ego, but what works for you guys doesn't always work for us!

Glad your wife has forgiven you. Tell her the truth one day and she will laugh, I hope, if she has a sense of humour!


Me:49 H:45 D:12 M:14 T:18
Bomb: 6/26/10
EA: 9/3/10, fizzled out slowly, now ???
11/5/11 Retrouvaille
Finally piecing....
Its peaceful at last, but we got a looong way to go
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Originally Posted By: XYZ
I still wouldn't raise what I said to the level of lying to my wife..., oh well. Moving on.



neither would I ...that's why I wrote it sounded odd...instead of saying X has his pants on fire.

Just to clarify.


Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.
--Jean Jacques Rousseau.
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Just had a 30 min conversation (a real one! Not TM!) with W. I honestly now think that later I may look at this as a breakthrough conversation. Real talking and real listening. Wow. That damn cat (you know, the one I hate) could end up being a major help for us....Whoda ever thunk that?


M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 781
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Originally Posted By: XYZ
Just had a 30 min conversation (a real one! Not TM!) with W. I honestly now think that later I may look at this as a breakthrough conversation. Real talking and real listening. Wow. That damn cat (you know, the one I hate) could end up being a major help for us....Whoda ever thunk that?


WHEW!!!!!

I read through this three times.

I read "breakthrough" as "breakup" each time I was wonder why you seemed so calm. laugh

Finally, on my 4th time, I read it correctly.

Oh, so now you LIKE the cat?


Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.
--Jean Jacques Rousseau.
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Quote:

Oh, so now you LIKE the cat?


Beat me to it!

Its amazing how...something bad has the chance to turn into something good.



Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis

Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans

Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK

TRUST THE PROCESS - Cadet

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It's a love/hate thing now with the cat.


M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 391
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Funny. As you said H, it was never about the cat. W hasn't thought for a long time that she was my priority. The cat was just an(other) example of that.... We discussed, I listened, I validated, she asked, I answered. I said, she listened. Neither attached; neither defended. We just talked.

It was only 30 minutes (she had to go). Still committed to MC which will have much more of that, I'm sure. Feeling pretty good at the moment.

W is a ponder-er; it'll be interesting to see how she's feeling in a couple of days...


M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 391
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Something she said that stood out: She said "remember when you came home last November and you were doing everything - almost waiting on me, and then you said it made you feel like a wuss? And I didn't like it because I didn't ask for that?" I said, "yes, I remember". She said, "That's how I felt last night, like you were just saying you liked the cat because you thought that's what I'd want you to do".

Message received.


M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 11,646
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"I liked the little hair ball puking, furniture destroying, shedding machine because it for some strange reason made you and the kids happy. I guess that means I'd like an octopus if it made you smile too, but please lets not get an octopus."

: )

Too soon? : o



Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis

Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans

Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK

TRUST THE PROCESS - Cadet

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Posts: 391
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Here's the really funny part....she's already got 2 (2!) kittens! coming in 2 weeks....

Those little F-ers will get to live in my house before I do!


M: 39 W: 37
Married: 9
D5; S3
"It's Over" 09/26/10
11 Day Sep 10/10
Piecing Starts 11/4/10
Piecing Fails 4/11
I move out 5/11
Hire Lawyer 6/11 - Stall 6/22/11
Piecing #2 - 6/22/11
Home 10/11
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