Hey all. Again, X is being more pleasant in texts. Honestly, tho', I believe it happens when she needs something.
This tax season should be the last of the IRS bashing. Since changing jobs and selling the house,the financial hemorrhage is slowing and I am in payoff mode now. The gorilla is sorta gone for the time being. Reminds me of a Carribbean T-shirt: "The beatings will stop when morale improves."
To CTH: A slo-cooker is a great way to make a meal. Emeril has some great recipes. You could throw a shoe in there and with a little salt and pepper, it would melt in your mouth the next day. Hey...why not take a chef's course? I love to cook. In fact, just bought a small gas grill that will fit my balcony. We all BBQ'd for the 1st time today.
Went out on a date the other night in NYC. The conversation went well. After a drink or two, my 'meet and greeter' leaned over to start kissing at the bar (which was crowded). Uh...I'm not a PDA type person. I got some great compliments which was uplifting but, I knew that was the end of THAT one.
My two radio appearances went very well. I had a lot of fun. S10 started baseball practice and looks like he will be the starting pitcher. He was ranked 17/20 in the draft (yes, LL'ers have drafts). I"m so proud of him. He transforms when he steps on the mound. D7 and I picked out our usual pile of arts and crafts projects to do: planting flowers and vegetables from seeds; making designer bars of soaps; shapes from pipe cleaners. My daughter and I have a great relationship. I hope it doesn't change.
Finally, I can't rule out the fact that my kids probably say things that they think I want to hear, but, I constantly hear: -mom doesn't spend time with us like this -mom just puts us to bed and doesn't read us stories like you do -I wish I could live with you.
SIGH.
I think, that, even at the ripe old age of 52, I still struggle with the horrible subsconcious little boy thing: "do they love her more than me?" You know, the jealousy thing. But...it's so much easier to just take that thought, wrap it up, and put it away. I just think to the hugs and the I loves yous I get and it fades away. I learned a lot here on this site, even if I regret having let myself get strung out here.
Everyone should try and save their marriage. NO ONE should hang on to a dead one. JMO.
To Frank and EverHopeful..thanks for continued to support. "an invincible summer."
Now,back to our regularly scheduled show: to CTH-I have a a$$kicking linguine with white clam sauce recipe and great Paul Prudhomme meat loaf recipe and a turkey burger recipe that even a turkey burger hater would love.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Compassion Saturday, at my son's baseball game, an assistant coach from last year's travel league team came up to me: Coach: Hey FIB, I wanted to thank you for something. It was something you taught me but it has nothing to do with baseball. Me: Ok, what??? Coach: Last summer, you told me to 'be in the moment' with my son. After that talk, I changed my whole life. I now stop everything I am doing and all my work on the computer when my kids come upstairs to talk to me and it made all the difference in the world. I want to thank you. Me: (dead silence and choked up)
I told ya so
About 3 weeks ago, X called me up pissed off at me accusing me of calling Child Protective Services against her. I had no idea what she was talking about. Apparently, someone (I am guessing D7's para at school), filed a complaint against XW. The allegation was that XW picked up D7 at school for nausea, vomiting and fever, then, proceeded to a job interview and locked D7 in the car. I was questioned about XW for only 2 minutes over the phone. XW claimed her new BF was with her. Case was found 'unsupported' and case sealed.
MD
XW called me yesterday. Kids were 'ruining' her Mother's Day and called me for help (???). I spoke with both kids on the phone, and, of course, did the right thing. S10 is now texting, again, several times a day that he misses me. He wanted me to pick him up last night at 930PM. Rough. D7 on the other hand has been shortening some of our time together to return to XW. I think she is coming of age when they need a woman, similar to S10 wanting to spend more time with me.
Can't escape this crap
Apparently, I was supposed to be paying XW thru Child Support Unit when I was paying her directly. Typical for NYS, I received a notice just the other day that I was in arrears for nearly a year and threatened me with revocation of my license, etc. Ugh. Fortunately, I paid all my checks to her thru the same bank acct and labelled them as CS. Spent a half a day printing up copies of cancelled checks. Ugh. Mailed all that stuff in the other day and now have to hope that they just do the right thing. What a waste of my time.
Me
Still dateless. I don't really feel lonely but I miss companionship and intimacy much. As time goes on I truly do not miss XW but I DO miss my home, having a family structure and that 'potential'. Apartment life is OK. Cramped compared to a house, but, losing the mortgage was like getting the proverbial gorilla off my back. XW likes to call now. She used to minimally communicate and rely on texts. Now, she calls. Having a BF, perhaps, is helping her lessen her anger. She brought him to one of our son's BB games and people came up to me afterward stating that it was inappropriate. It's her life now. Me? I just grab my catcher's glove and warm up my son on the mound.
S10...out of pain comes opportunity
Our kids suffered thru our divorce. Sadly, my son found solace in having a catch with me. Sometimes, my son would drag me outside 4X-a-day. Sometimes, he would drag me out at 8AM before the bus came. We would have a catch. Over and over again. Eventually, he began to throw really well.
On opening day, my son pitched four innings. He let up no runs. He retired the side with 12 pitches. This Saturday, he nearly had a perfect inning. He threw 12 strikeouts. He's been asked to pitch on his travel team and also to become a core member to stay with the team over the years. He has an on base percentage of .600 and consistently hits into the outfield.
This is not a brag. In fact, as I drove home after this 1st game, I couldn't keep the tears from pouring down my face. The pain was so great. You see, in his attempt to escape his pain, he would run outside to have a catch with his father. In an attempt to escape his pain, he learned to throw. In an attempt to escape his pain, he developed a desire to pitch.
I'm so proud of my son. I just wish that, life had given him a different start.
The best to all of you. FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Add..to kml: I guess if she didn't post 10 year old pix of herself and was a better kisser, maybe things would have been different. Bleh. Just not a PDA person. Hugs. FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Lol - I have heard that before, about the old pictures. Funny, the response I usually get from men I meet is that I look even better than my pictures And lately, this is coming from younger men Life is good!!!!
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
And lately, this is coming from younger men