NOTICE: In order to help the OnLine Community run more efficiently, we will be pruning the boards over the next few weeks. If there are any Topics or Posts you want to keep, please save them soon.
Page 39 of 53 < 1 2 ... 37 38 39 40 41 ... 52 53 >
Topic Options
#1872834 - 11/12/09 12:57 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: frank_D]
KerryK Offline
Member

Registered: 10/17/07
Posts: 5992
Loc: Beaver State
There is a bit of irony in this. Even if you are just above the levels for bankrupcy, the fees for a bankrupcy lawyer are such to push you below the level where you can qualify for bankrupcy.

Frank, a friend of mine went through a costly divorce several years ago and he told me that it takes about 3-5 years for most guys to regain themselves financially and that he was almost back to normal. The thing is that guys usually recover financially from a divorce. Women on the other hand dont have the same statistics as most of them end up living at a reduced financial level.

It may seem like all doom and gloom now, but I have faith that you are going to turn this all around. Who knows, but maybe after you have regained yourself some emotionally, you may meet a nice lady who is financially stable and the two of you together can combine to live comfortably.
_________________________
Young divorced dad who lives half the time with a wonderful son (10) and daughter (8).

Top
#1872838 - 11/12/09 01:02 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: frank_D]
frank_D Offline
Member

Registered: 11/03/05
Posts: 4939
Loc: Ventura County, CA
Talked to STBX about this. She was agreeable that it was a smart move to not go forward if it was questionable.

Then she went on to ask if I was going to be able to pay her the $500/month she is supposed to get. I told her I would pay her first before other bills. She kept saying "are you sure you can afford it?"

Then she went on to talk about how she can't afford her debt and she needs a place where she can have her own room. Then she asks me how long do I think I'll be in the house and I said probably 6 months more before it forecloses.

She pauses, then says "well, I'm wondering something..." then silence for about 10 seconds.

I swear to God I thought she was going to suggest we share the house until then to save money...

After a few seconds she says she want's to talk to D18 about possibly living with her. I mentioned that D18 wants me to rent a 3 bedroom house so D14 can visit and have her own room. STBX says "Well, I'm going to ask her anyway because she wanted to live with me before but I didn't have the space in the condo".

D18 doesn't pay rent to me, she barely makes enough money to pay for her personal life while going to college.

I didn't say anything. She mentioned that the person who is letting her rent the condo for $600/month may want her to move out in the near future. Nothing for me to say there either.

Trust your feelings. Remember that. Your intuition is always right.
_________________________
Current Thread


Top
#1872843 - 11/12/09 01:04 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: KerryK]
frank_D Offline
Member

Registered: 11/03/05
Posts: 4939
Loc: Ventura County, CA
Originally Posted By: KerryK
There is a bit of irony in this. Even if you are just above the levels for bankrupcy, the fees for a bankrupcy lawyer are such to push you below the level where you can qualify for bankrupcy.

I am about $10k above the level. I'm just angry that he's likely to charge me $600-900 for filling in some forms. I just have a sense about him. What kind of lawyer yells at his client because his client doesn't feel comfortable doing this?

Quote:

It may seem like all doom and gloom now, but I have faith that you are going to turn this all around. Who knows, but maybe after you have regained yourself some emotionally, you may meet a nice lady who is financially stable and the two of you together can combine to live comfortably.

That would be nice.
_________________________
Current Thread


Top
#1872845 - 11/12/09 01:07 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: frank_D]
ClingingToHope Offline
Member

Registered: 09/07/09
Posts: 3068
Loc: Illinois, United States
My D lawyer said WE, W and I, may need to discuss bankruptcy before a D because she ran up so much credit card debt and now that we're apart, we keep sinking more and more.

I really don't want to file. I just want to get enough out of the D to pay off my car. I still have a car payment she doesn't.

I could file. I have a car and a place and a second income. So I'll make it.

The problem we have is very few assets. We're underwater on the house. She'd have to take a chunk of the CC debt -- I'm paying all of it, except for what she's wracked up since -- and there's no bank or credit card company that will give her a loan to take the debt.

I'm somewhat stuck.
_________________________
Me: 45, Ds 15-11, D final 6-11
http://tinyurl.com/yk4e2tz
http://tiny.cc/thread2
http://tinyurl.com/ydtphqu
http://tinyurl.com/thread4
http://tinyurl.com/3sm78k6
http://tinyurl.com/thread6

Top
#1872872 - 11/12/09 01:40 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: ClingingToHope]
frank_D Offline
Member

Registered: 11/03/05
Posts: 4939
Loc: Ventura County, CA
Well the Bankruptcy lawyer surprised me and only charged me $300. Says he did 3 hours of work but I think he didn't and knew it when I challenged that statement.

All well that ends well. Now time to work hard and make a better future for my daughters.
_________________________
Current Thread


Top
#1872886 - 11/12/09 01:58 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: frank_D]
KerryK Offline
Member

Registered: 10/17/07
Posts: 5992
Loc: Beaver State
Good deal on not getting raked by the lawyer.

I am envious that you have a swimming pool. The kids tell me that their future step dad is going to build a swim pool and playground for them. This is all we have at my house (minus the slide)... http://www.twincitiesdailyphoto.com/2007/redneck_waterslide.jpg
_________________________
Young divorced dad who lives half the time with a wonderful son (10) and daughter (8).

Top
#1872890 - 11/12/09 02:01 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: KerryK]
fisherman Offline
Member

Registered: 10/12/08
Posts: 4034
LOL!!

That looks exactly like the set up I have for the kids!

I guess I might be considered redneckish. smile
_________________________
Don't stand still.

Top
#1872900 - 11/12/09 02:17 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: fisherman]
KerryK Offline
Member

Registered: 10/17/07
Posts: 5992
Loc: Beaver State
No trapt, you are not a redneck. Only if you put some live bass in the pool would that make you a redneck.
_________________________
Young divorced dad who lives half the time with a wonderful son (10) and daughter (8).

Top
#1872904 - 11/12/09 02:22 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: KerryK]
K4D Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/08
Posts: 3975
Did you put a live bass in the pool?

Kevin
_________________________
Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...

Top
#1872905 - 11/12/09 02:24 PM Re: Trusting yourself [Re: K4D]
KerryK Offline
Member

Registered: 10/17/07
Posts: 5992
Loc: Beaver State
I would, but bass fishing in Oregon stinks.
_________________________
Young divorced dad who lives half the time with a wonderful son (10) and daughter (8).

Top
Page 39 of 53 < 1 2 ... 37 38 39 40 41 ... 52 53 >


Moderator:  dbmod, Jack_Three_Beans, Virginia 

Save Your Marriage! Schedule Online

Schedule a phone consultation with a Divorce Busting® Coach! Call: 800-664-2435 or 303-444-7004