Oz, just remember that I've been at this a long time. I'm certainly not known for my speedy progress! As for the night loneliness, this is still an issue for me and one I have to work at. I try to mentally plan for the evening ahead so that I have tasks to do...read, watch a movie, iron, take kids to dinner, invite others over, take a bath etc etc. To be truthful this is still my biggest hurdle; that and going to weddings alone which I will do once again this month.
i'm at the same point as you I think. It's been 3 weeks of no contact, it's obvious that my H doesn't give a ...
Thinking about going for a D myself rather than wait. I think the reason my H hasn't done it before is financial rather than emotional. So it's probably in my best financial interest to do it sooner rather than later. If it suited my H financially I think I'd be D by now. There's a lesson in there somewhere, I will do and see a solicitor anyway and find out where I stand.
Me and you are about the same age, if we're to start dating again we'd better get a move before we go grey and our teeth drop out!
Cas: that's the thing isn't it? And yet the wake up can come so suddenly too, and if it does, the damage done to you will take some fixing.
Just dropping by really to add some well wishes, and I live in one of the midly exotic places you mentioned
Me 42 W 39 Married: 11 Jan 1998, T: Since 1992 First Bomb: Sep 2007 Confirmed A/OM: 4 Nov 2007 Kids: D10, S5 Reconciled and together again after (alot of) time and heartbreak. 3rd kid, S, born 2 Jan 2010.
Hey Bonny, Guess what the gray hair is well and truly in place for me...just lucky I've got a good hairdresser!! Your thoughts on the emotional/financial aspect of divorce are interesting. We only have no fault divorce here and our hold up is our business cos after divorce there's only 12 months for financial settlements. On the last argument H suggested a divorce as he always does when he gets angry and then it blows over. He has said he doesn't want a divorce but I don't know why.
Thanks Deep. I have read your sitch before as I know from your signature.....expecting No. 3 isn't too common on here!! I will go back and have another read and see if I'm on the money with one of the mildly exotic places I have mentioned.
Cough a bit better so I had an improved sleep. More of the same old same old..... doing nothing. It's funny how during the busy times at work we crave time to do nothing and when it's here we don't really want it! Think it all comes down to the fact that we want choice of when to have it and for how long. I love some R and R but I want to do some more active things than pushing play on the dvd!
You are so right, I have always found that to. I certainly got my wish for more me time but it is hard to fill all that free time up.
I know you would rather being doing some active things, but that will come in time once you are 100% fit and well again and unfortunately we can't rush that, our bodies will heal when they are ready.
Hope your weather is better in Qld than here, I think the rain is going to ruin my plans.
Tell me, did your kids end up getting anything for your H for father's day? Mine didn't, no cards, no present.
Father's Day- D did say something about buying a joint gift with S but no action on it. They've made no plans to do anything with him either but they could do at the last minute, of course.
Hey Cas - good to hear that your cough is a little better. It's often the anaesthetic that makes this happen for people. It will go.
I'm the opposite way around to you and Oz - I find the days long and lonely where as the evenings I now quite enjoy! I have my routine of making a hot water bottle (it's still cold here!), a milky Horlicks, gathering up the moggies on to their bed blanket with me and then hunkering down to watch all the Foxtel programmes that I have 'taped' (what is the word for taped now that we do it digitally? That's twice this week that has cropped up)!!
The day times I struggle with. No work, no kids and new friends doing their work/own thing. I know that this will improve when I get a job and after my 'ticking off' yesterday from ((JCJ)), I am now giving serious thought to moving interstate ... QLD would be my first choice. I need to do some research first though and I don't think that it would be a bad thing if H got to know about it on the grapevine, if you know what I mean!
So, Father's Day is here - the one we all talked about a few weeks ago and I got it wrong and sent the card last week! Ah well. H didn't respond to the babies anyhow so I know what he thought of that! How did your H respond ... or have the kids just not said anything??
Get lots of rest today .. back to work for you tomorrow?? Did they not do a return to work plan to ease you in more gently than straight back full time?
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
