Just a quick theological point - the Bible says "judge not, so you won't be judged", but the literal translation of judging in that instance is determining someone's entrance into heaven or hell.
The Bible says stealing is a sin. If someone steals, they sin. If they commit adultery, the Bible (not me or you) say it's a sin. How is it judging to point that? Just sayin...
Now, for YOU, Kevin, stop worrying about the life she is living. You can't live it for her, you can't change her, you aren't responsible for her. My suggestion is this - the time you would normally spend thinking about the life she is living - turn that time into prayer for her, and see which is more effective. Worry or prayer?
Me-35 W-32 M-4yrs A - 6/26/2013 D filed 8/19/2013, dismissed 12/13/2013 D refiled 2/24/2014, dismissed Second A 5/2014, I filed, finally done
I am not putting myself above her. I have admitted TONS of times that I also have committed many sins and do to this day. While I try not to as best as possible, I still fall at times. The problem here is people are assuming that I am casting a stone at her and I am not. I am merely praying that she leave this life of adultery. I am not deciding her fate for her. I am not telling her where her destiny lies. I am not saying she is going to hell or heaven because of anything she has done. I am only praying that she quit living in that particular sin is all I am doing.
Somehow that got turned around on me into me judging her. I am not her judge nor will I ever be. Nor could I ever be as my own life has plenty of misteps in it. The difference is I am trying to not commit those sins in the future to the best of my ability knowing that I will fall now and then anyways. But I am not pursuing them. I am praying that she quit pursuing this sin. Huge difference between that and judging her for it.
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
K, That's not what I'm saying. Judging or not judging is an interesting side bar conversation but it is distracting from the real issue(s). My point is WE, emphasis intended, focus on the faults of other people without focusing in on ourselves. Not sure why that is but in a R that is deadly. Not only does it create resentment but it puts focus on something we have no control over. You only have so much time and energy and if its focused on something you can not control it is wasted.
_________________________ Me-41 W-39 M-15 yrs T-17 yrs D-12 S-9 S-8 B 5/08 S 1/09
Stop worrying about what she is doing. It is not healthy.
God has a plan for all of us and this might be his plan for her.
Let Go! and FOCUS on YOU NOT HER.
Period! That is ALL anyone is saying. FOCUS on YOU!!!
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next. Amen.