A Divorce Busting® Coach can help you save your marriage, even when your spouse wants out. Go to the new Divorce Busting® Store where you can sign up for Divorce Busting® Coaching and purchase Michele's Audios, Videos and eBooks that you can immediately download. Start taking the steps that will help you get your marriage back on track right away.
Page 84 of 239 < 1 2 ... 82 83 84 85 86 ... 238 239 >
Topic Options
#1837487 - 09/14/09 07:12 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: MrBond]
K4D Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/08
Posts: 3975
Just one other little note. I asked my priest if it was selfish to pray for my marriage to be restored and he said no, it isn't. That is something God created and we should want our marriage's to be restored. It is what is best for families.

Kevin
_________________________
Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...

Top
#1837499 - 09/14/09 07:21 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: K4D]
breakaway Offline
Member

Registered: 10/08/08
Posts: 1464
thanks stuck...that's what I meant.

Kevin, let me say it another way, although I don't know why I am, because I know it won't make any difference...

YOU'RE OBSESSED WITH HER. IMO, she has ceased to even be a person in your mind, she is an object you are obsessed with having. Furthermore, your expectations seem to be that of six year old!

I have HAD someone obsessed with me. Even a restraining order could not get through to this person that I DID NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM. He could go through pages and pages of why that was unreasonable of me, and whose fault it was. He could not accept that I DID NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM. He thought God thought we should be together.

Even after going to court he found me in public and asked me if I could just "forgive" him and come back.

THIS is how you are acting!!!!!!

It's not selfish to pray for your family to be restored. But after a YEAR you are not accepting that your wife DOES NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP with you. If you want to "stand" forever, then do so, but ACCEPT that she is set on her course right now.

And, no, she is not going to offer to ML on your birthday, and the fact that you said you aren't going to ask for it, which would be insane at this point, tells me you are indeed THINKING OF ASKING. I hope you don't.

Why don't you take this new closeness to God and serve him for a while and STOP OBSESSING. If you CAN'T STOP OBSESSING you need a doctor. Like yesterday.
_________________________
Me-42,H-41,M-14
S-12,9


Previous thread

Top
#1837518 - 09/14/09 07:43 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: breakaway]
K4D Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/08
Posts: 3975
breakaway, I accept that she does not want a relationship with me right now. I don't know how I have lead anyone to believe otherwise.

And I am not going to ask to ML on my birthday. The mere thought from remembering last year crossed my mind as far as a memory goes. But I am not stupid enough to ask for it again.

Sheesh, I say anything about my W and I am obsessing about her and need major help. My gosh. Like nobody thinks about their S when going through this.

Kevin
_________________________
Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...

Top
#1837523 - 09/14/09 07:46 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: K4D]
K4D Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/08
Posts: 3975
It is not like I am constantly thinking about her. I just simply rehashed some things that have happened lately in the past few months. But if I post anything about her at all... OMG!!! I am mentally stocking her.

Cmon yall, give me a break.

Kevin
_________________________
Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...

Top
#1837529 - 09/14/09 07:52 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: K4D]
K4D Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/08
Posts: 3975
breakaway,

Were you married to that man or was he just a boyfriend?

Kevin
_________________________
Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...

Top
#1837540 - 09/14/09 08:05 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: K4D]
K4D Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/08
Posts: 3975
I am standing for our covenant marriage. And I do know that it is God's will for it to be restored. And I do hope my W's heart softens eventually. God created marriage. 1 man and 1 woman for life. He made us one flesh partners when we got married. He does not support divorce. I am not going to go into the whole spill again.

He does expect us to forgive each other and always work on our marriage. He says it is ok for us to separate for a time and pray and then he tells us to come back together.

All this aside, I know very well where I stand in my covenant marriage at this time.

Kevin
_________________________
Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...

Top
#1837545 - 09/14/09 08:10 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: K4D]
C-Bart Offline
Member

Registered: 07/30/09
Posts: 882
Loc: Missouri
I believe you K. But maybe God is using this as a way to change you to be the man he needs you to be.
_________________________
_________________________
Me-41
W-39
M-15 yrs T-17 yrs
D-12
S-9
S-8
B 5/08
S 1/09

Top
#1837548 - 09/14/09 08:11 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: K4D]
K4D Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/08
Posts: 3975
There are 3 reasons why I want her back in any particular order. Here they are.

1) I don't want my kids having to finish growing up in a broken home. That isn't fair to them. Plus, D continues to set a precedence in the family if this happens and can very well affect their own future M's.

2) I don't want my W living in adultery which is what she will be doing if she decides to remarry another man. I don't want her to have to face judgement for that. I worry about her.

3) I do love her and care about her and I do miss her. Our family is very important and special. It just needs to be recessitated in whatever God's timing is.

Kevin
_________________________
Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...

Top
#1837550 - 09/14/09 08:12 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: K4D]
K4D Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/08
Posts: 3975
Quote:
I believe you K. But maybe God is using this as a way to change you to be the man he needs you to be.


C-Bart,

I hope he is.

Kevin
_________________________
Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...

Top
#1837565 - 09/14/09 08:40 PM Re: K4D Rising #4 [Re: K4D]
MrBond Offline
Member

Registered: 06/18/08
Posts: 11162
I think you just re-enforced everyone's idea that you really need to let go let God.

"I don't want my W living in adultery which is what she will be doing if she decides to remarry another man. I don't want her to have to face judgement for that. I worry about her."

This isn't about what YOU want. It's what SHE wants. If she wants to live in eternal sin, then that's HER choice. It sucks but it is HER choice. Change that thinking. It's stuff like that that make you SOUND like a stalker. Geez no one said you were. We said you were beginning to sound like one.

It's the obsessive thinking for the object of desire that is the basis of stalking.
_________________________
M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

Top
Page 84 of 239 < 1 2 ... 82 83 84 85 86 ... 238 239 >


Moderator:  dbmod, Virginia 

Save Your Marriage! Schedule Online

Schedule a phone consultation with a Divorce Busting® Coach! Call: 800-664-2435 or 303-444-7004