Are you suggesting there IS hope, or just stating in your opinion I'm not a "fool"?
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
I feel as long as there is love, there is hope. You seem to have a lot of patience, understanding, and compassion for your ex.
You are also intellegent and insightful when it comes to her issues and life in general for that matter. You have a pretty good understanding as to why this happened.
Your life can not and should not stop though. You have to keep on moving and just be open to whatever comes your way.
It's all up to mlc'er when it comes to facing their issues. We are powerless in this respect.
You and only you can make that choice. The easiest way to go about it would be to be totally open to ANYTHING, even if it's not exactly how you have planned it. Live your life for you and your children right now and TRULY be open to anything. All things will still remain possible right?
But you need to form a new and healthier relationship with her now. She should not be able to dump on you when it is convenient for her. Maybe it would be best to work on forming that new and healthier R. Perhaps more dim would be good for you. I was quite dark and it helped me become more detached.
And you need to make the best life for yourself without her. That will make it more appealing to come back.
Again, if you are too clingy, you will be in a situation where you look needy at best and pathetic at worst.
As far as what to do...well, maybe the answer for now is nothing. You don't have to make any decisions at the moment, so don't.
M: 16 years Bomb 4/07 OW 20s long gone Divorced 11/09 I remarried New Guy Cooperative r w/X regarding D
They're kinda like a cat that's been hit by a car. They can't be caught nor helped but you can sure make them more upset if you don't leave them be.
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
Remember we have to take care of ourselves mentally and physically, and spiritually:
when David was running from Saul, even though he trusted God completely, I wonder if he ever thought nothing is going to change. Well, it did and he became King. When Joseph was sold into slavery, I wonder if he ever thought nothing is going to change - but it did - it got better for a season, then got really bad. So, when he was in prison, I wonder if he again thought nothing is going to change - he had even been forgotten by the one who promised to tell Pharoah about him. Well, it did and he became second only to Pharoah. Naomi was so sure things nothing was going to change that she changed her name to Marah, which meant bitter, but something did happen and joy again filled her life. Gods Word speaks to us so many times about situations that seemed impossible, in some instances years of trials were involved, but though faith and obedience to God what appeared to be impossible became possible and things did happen.
God is always in control and when we get out of the way and let Him do His will for our lives, amazing blessing await us.
do u ever just wonder.....is this our trial...if it is wouldnt u hate to miss it to go on your way to BE HAPPY.....i dont think seeking God's will you can ever go wrong and its never wasted time.....
I think keep going to church....let God show you the way to go
We also had a tragedy with a child.....statics arent good....but our Gods a big God...and God will also purpose in your heart his will....so I just think discernment is the big thing here....
I know that many of us, myself included, think of our current situations as THEIR issue. I keep praying that God will act in THEIR life to do ... whatever. I'm not saying that this MLC isn't THIER issue, but maybe the work that God is doing is for us as well. Maybe we need to be open to the possibilty that in addition to our spouses, God is trying to get us to change, or address something within us that needs to be surrendered, or altered.
