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Yes! I am sure that he does too ... I feel that he's gone but not quite that far away yet!

Thanks Cas!


WAH 43; W 47
M 16; T 17
Cats 15 & 6
Bomb 27/05/09
ow 28/06/09

"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"

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I can tell you now from experience Nell, that he won't remember anything that he has said to you and as others have said it is complete BS what they dish out.

My H is a classic example, they don't even seem to remember what you tell them either.

It's funny Nell, you are feeling your mood going down now where I feel mine is on the way up again, so we are riding our waves just at different times and over different issues happening at any given time.

Sorry I haven't been around much today, really wanted to get the house more sorted before I go to work tomorrow, will definitely be online then all day popping in and out. I work in real estate so I am always online the whole day.

I am sure he still has you as next of kin, he wouldn't even have thought about changing any of that.

Sorry Nell I think I have missed a few posts here, will go back and read them now. Should have done that before I started writing.

Silly Oz

(((Nell))



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Hi Nell

Hope your day is looking better now! I know what you mean trying to read things into their emails or answer phone messages, I did that last thursday wont make that mistake again as I was so wrong.. Its hard but I think you just have to accept that whilst he is in alien territory he will just put down or say what he wants and it doesnt mean anything, in fact I have just started imagining H as ET not only does it make me laugh but nobody understood ET much either lol. Chin up girl you will make it through this as we all have too whether we successfully turn our own ET's around or not! Lots of hugs Rabbit x


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Morning Nell

Thought I would check in and see how you are going, what are your plans for today?



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Hi Rabbit - nice of you to drop by.

Yes, your ET imagery made me smile - that was always one of H's favourite films, though when I mentioned it a few months back, he denied that was the case! Ha! Typical of everything we say ... aliens - gotta luv 'em!! grin

Have left you a longer post on your thread so hope that makes sense in regard to you contacting H and how you handle that.

(((Rabbit)))


WAH 43; W 47
M 16; T 17
Cats 15 & 6
Bomb 27/05/09
ow 28/06/09

"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"

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Hi Oz
Well, not quite sure how I am travelling today. Not as bad as yesterday, I don't think but don't know what's made that any different as I have been holed up here for the past few days and made no effort to go out or even do anything. I have loafed about in my jim-jams and played Harrod's Doorman to the moggies who are in and out, incessantly - it's their attempt at getting me some exercise, I think!

Despite being on Dark Day Seven, I have decided that to answer H's email is probably a sensible thing, after reading lots of comments about detaching. Will leave it until this afternoon though as it will be almost 48hrs since he let me know he's back on his old email address. I shall just reply "OK - thanks" and leave it at that. The temptation to ask when he is coming around or can we have a phone call is immense but I shall not succomb.

I guess that underneath my tough Cancerian Crabby exterior, I am lurking the thoughts of when it is that H is going for his vacation - I also can't imagine why he told me about it, other than to know that it would get me fired up, as it has, although I have not shown him that. It's a selfish act to tell someone this information when he knows that I don't have two cents to scratch myself with. Still, I have checked and the money that I forwarded toward the mortgage this month has now hit our joint account, so I am hoping that he makes up the difference. If he does not, that's when we could really run in to trouble. H's money is due into the joint account within four days but my persoanl account is now totally cleaned out.

No plans for today - can't be bothered and so will continue to allow myself to mope in an upbeat kind of way! I have refocused for tomorrow though and I shall go out and weed'n'feed the lawns, feed the plants, do a genreal tidy up in the front and side gardens (to enhance what I did earlier in the week) and then go to the accountant in the afternoon to get my tax return lodged. This is the big 180 that H will not be expecting! I'm sure that he is still waiting on the call for me begging him to do it soon, as the end of the month cut off demands and he knows that I was very concerned about.

Last night, I felt that H was not here as he is on an extended work trip and he would be home soon. I found myself telling the cats "don't worry, Daddy will be home in a while - we just need to let him have some space right now - let's all say Goodnight Daddy - we love you" ... and then I sighed at my stupidity. I can only cope for short bursts and then I slide down the greasy pole again ... fast.


WAH 43; W 47
M 16; T 17
Cats 15 & 6
Bomb 27/05/09
ow 28/06/09

"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"

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It is okay to have a mopey day in your jim jams now again, just don't let it become a habit.

Remember as I told Cas, a very wise lovely lady here told me that you must show control but don't be difficult so yes you should answer the email this afternoon. Your answer is sufficient, to the point and business like.

Definitely go and get your tax done, because you will get your refund in 14 days and you could use the cash. I have to do mine as well but I am always the one that has organised both of our returns at the accountant.

I am a Cancerian too, my birthday is in June.



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Wise words Oz ... and so they would be from a fellow Cancerian!! I am July.

Anniversaries are my next big worry ... WA is on 11th and I am already in panic mode in case H does as he did on my birthday and ignores it ... I am quite resolved (as a 180) not to send him any greeting on the day, though it seriously will kill me inside. I'm sure that his parents are also wondering what to do -they have NEVER missed out on sending us a card.

Any thoughts on how to prepare/deal with that, just so that I can start to get myself ready ... anybody?? I have a sneaking suspicion that he will use that weekend to go on his planned trip ... I don't know why I think that but I just do. Paranoia yet again!


WAH 43; W 47
M 16; T 17
Cats 15 & 6
Bomb 27/05/09
ow 28/06/09

"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"

Started counselling 17/08/09
Joined: Aug 2009
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OOOOOhh that's a tough question.

I can't answer that one in any way shape or form but will be interested to see what the wise ones here have to say as ours will be coming up in November and I too will be wondering what to do, how to handle it etc etc.



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Morning Nell

Thanks for trying to work through all posts this morning I have just left a last one and would appreciate a reply before I make any more faux pas!

As for you well if you are still moping jump up and do something! bearing in mind I havent a clue what time it is in Oz..

Your cats sounds like my little girly, she even expects me to lift the cat flap up for her if Im in the utility room, she is such a little princess! I keep telling her that daddy will come home when he gets a brain again lol.

Will be thinking of you, isnt the internet marvelous even though we are all in different countries in the same boat we can still have friends any where in the world

Chin up Nell

xx


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Once lost but now found and happily married again!
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