Oh, and by the way, look at how significant Kevin is here and how much attention Kevin gets for being a real nut. Most of us with kids know that some people thrive on ANY attention, even if it is negative.
Delayed gratification. That is something I so have to work on.
Letting go and letting God. Again something I still have to so work on.
Patience. I have to learn to do this.
Rely on myself only. I'm getting better at this while it is still a work in progress.
WORK WORK WORK on myself. Can't be emphasized enough.
DETACH DETACH DETACH, but still pray & love unconditionally.
Work the program.
My Lord, please grant me strength, patience and wisdom.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
I admit. I am an alcoholic who is trying to stay sober. I admitted that at AA.
It seems as though I have an addictive personality. Seems hard to argue with that. I have defeated a lot of addictions in my past. Smoking and drugs as a teen, looking at innapropriate content on TV and internet in my earlier years. I defeated that. Alcohol, I am working on defeating that.
My W? I do love her and I am trying to follow the bible on not giving up on my S. You can say I pick and choose what I want. Nobody is perfect. But I am choosing to not go the wrong route on this as far as our covenant M. It is a covenant M. It is not some silly little dribble from attorneys and judges on paper that determine whether or not you are M in the eyes of God. An earthly D has nothing to do with what God joined together and said let NO MAN separate it. Therefore, why would I respect a judge granting an earthly D and an earthly remarriage when the bible clearly says that is adultery. The judge is out of his or her mind to think they have authority over what God put in place.
Now I have to respect the laws and follow them and I do. I am very much a law abiding citizen. But it doesn't mean I have to have respect for the earthly decision that some judge thinks over rules what God put in place. Liberal judges have just decimated the foundation of M in this country. Its a real shame.
None the less, if I have to stand alone, I have to stand alone. But at least I know I am keeping my covenant which nobody can break regardless of what sins are committed.
It is not falling on the sword. It is trying to do what God has commanded us to do. It is hard. It would be far easier to say to heck with it all and start dating again. I almost did. Infact at one point, I did go on a date earlier on because I felt like what is the point of standing. But then it was emphasized to me again that I am standing for my covenant M that God put in place and I am standing in the gap while my prodigal S is out doing the prodigal worldly thing. How in the world is that easy to do? It is the hardest thing to do that their is.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
It is not some silly little dribble from attorneys and judges on paper that determine whether or not you are M in the eyes of God. An earthly D has nothing to do with what God joined together and said let NO MAN separate it.
BTW, I borrowed some of these terms from Tomato's thread.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Since I know you are an attorney, none of that was directed towards you. It was a generalization of the earthly process trying to take precedence over what the bible says on M by many people out there who create laws that don't respect the institution of M that God set up.
I happen to know from all I have heard from you that you are an excellent attorney with morals and values and a wonderful human being in all that you do.
So please don't think I was talking about you when I made my comments that I did. It had nothing to do with you.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
How long did you and your W pray together about whether it was God's will for you to M?
She refused to pray with me for whether or not this was God's will for our M. She instead prayed that God would give her OM and take him away from his family. She said she knew it was wrong, but God already knew what she wanted so that was what she was going to pray for.
However, she said she did pray earlier on for his will, but still would not pray with me.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
