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#1683728 - 12/31/08 01:25 AM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: Tomato]
Tomato Offline
Member

Registered: 01/03/08
Posts: 4058
Loc: Northeast
Thanks you have a great night also MT

I will pray that you will be able to do even better than just containing those thought about would he do this and that for OW. I will pray that they don't come over you at all and therefore they will not have to be contained. Work on that.

No sense wasting time thinking about her, she will be gone before you know it!


T
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#1683731 - 12/31/08 01:27 AM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: Tomato]
MT35 Offline
Member

Registered: 09/03/08
Posts: 1623
Loc: Kansas
Yes, I understand T. My friends want me to make this a brand new year, and tell H take a hike. But all know that I can't do that yet. I wish I could be a bit stronger, but I am not at that point yet.

You know my H lives with OW, not sure exactly to what extent live with, but he still refers to me as his old lady, and his friends do too. I don't even know if we did really go separate ways that we would D right away. H and I have talked about him dropping his Insurance at work and just be on mine, because they want his to be primary and it isn't near as good, but he still sees us as being married to drop his insurance to be on mine. It just doesn't make any sense. I really don't think it ever will.
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#1683734 - 12/31/08 01:29 AM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: Tomato]
MT35 Offline
Member

Registered: 09/03/08
Posts: 1623
Loc: Kansas
Thanks T-

I really appreciate the conversation tonight! I know she is a fleeting fancy.

I hope that your darling and you will get to share some WARM time together for the start of the new year!

Take care T!
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#1683808 - 12/31/08 03:56 AM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: MT35]
Tomato Offline
Member

Registered: 01/03/08
Posts: 4058
Loc: Northeast
I have my doubts on that WARM stuff.

Actually what did you mean by that ..sex??

At this point I will take her just deciding to be present.

I would like her to come around for more than just sex ..of course not at the exclusion of the sex but for us to actually be able to spend peaceful, cohesive time non-sexually. I believe we can. What her view on that is entirely uncertain to me. She just seems like she will never emerge from a juvenile state. Now it is 'ice' time with the phone call embargo. Take my ball and go home BS.

It is just such complete and total BS.
I have reached my limit of it. SHe seems to always be hiding behind something. I am a black & white kinda person and I will either speak the truth and be genuine about things or I will say nothing at all. Trouble is truth starts and ends with Jesus ..the alpha and omega. She doesn't have a personal relationship with Him. For her, having Jesus in her life means having to go to the store and purchase a crucifix. That is a far cry from having a personal relationship with Christ and the truth that can only come from Him.

I am utterly confused as to what I will do next. I can't deal with this crap anymore.

\:\(

T
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#1683818 - 12/31/08 04:05 AM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: Tomato]
kelaaron Offline
Member

Registered: 08/27/08
Posts: 1621
Mt-take your time sweetie. He made a huge huge HUGE admission to you this weekend. He is not sure about what he is doing. Please have patience and let him come about this in his own way. If you push, even though you want to stop hurting and start healing, you will just push him away. Considering everything you have already been through, I know you can do this and let things unfold in their own time.

Happy New Year my friend.
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#1683969 - 12/31/08 01:13 PM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: Tomato]
MT35 Offline
Member

Registered: 09/03/08
Posts: 1623
Loc: Kansas
T-

The warm comment came from your

"If she is going to persist with the 'ice woman' routine right through and into the New Year then a thought just came over me."

I wasn't meaning sex exactly just that maybe the ice woman would warm up.

I am sorry things are not progressing for you. I feel for you.

I too would like to blow this day off the map. I want 2008 over, but I am not sure how to handle 2009 either. I guess I will deal no matter what happens, but I guess I will deal with it no matter what.

Take Care T!
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#1683972 - 12/31/08 01:15 PM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: kelaaron]
MT35 Offline
Member

Registered: 09/03/08
Posts: 1623
Loc: Kansas
Thanks Kel-

I know he needs time, but it is just killing me. I guess I was hoping that the New Year would bring a New Us. I know I shouldn't be expecting anything, but I am not doing the best with that one. I know he has come a long way. I need to be thankful for that and just be still. I guess I will.

Great to hear from you Kel! Have a happy new year, still looking for that New Years Miracle!
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#1683989 - 12/31/08 01:32 PM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: MT35]
Tomato Offline
Member

Registered: 01/03/08
Posts: 4058
Loc: Northeast
yo

right back to this dog pile
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#1683990 - 12/31/08 01:32 PM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: MT35]
kelaaron Offline
Member

Registered: 08/27/08
Posts: 1621
Mt-I know how hard it is but you have the answer--be still--for now.

Try to remember that if it is worth it, if it is actually going to work, it will take time and that is important for true healing. Please give both of you the opportunity to do it the right way.

Remember, this will be a new you, a new R, so the New Year is bringing that. So dont ignore the little miracles, sometimes they r the best kind.
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If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.

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#1683992 - 12/31/08 01:34 PM Re: Skating on Soap Suds [Re: Tomato]
Tomato Offline
Member

Registered: 01/03/08
Posts: 4058
Loc: Northeast
hi MT

this places draws us back or me back everytime

I got nothing else
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