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Any links to the PDF?


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
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HFGW and R2C...if any of you can contact SD...he has it. If not, page 4 of this thread may help. Links to this have been deleted in the past. FIB


Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11)
Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t
Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10
Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
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How are things today singledad?


Married 6 years
D4
D4
S2
seperated: 7/15/08
Dbomb: 9/21/08
status: seperated in same home, meeting with mediator moving toward D
current thread
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 365
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Sorry - I haven't posted in a while... Maybe it's because I am not in desperation mode as I was before..

I have finally started to get back to the Gym... I did not go once int the time W was with my W (7 years together)... It was always spending time with her or doing a quicker workout from home.

Now I am trying to GAL... I seems really strange - It is like I am living a double personality...

One day, one weekend, etc - I am a dedicated 100% Dad, thinking of things to do with my daughter, and only things with my daughter.

the next day, the next weekend, etc. - I am completely on my own, Single, and trying to think of things to do for myself.

It is so strange to experience this... I do not really like this dual lifestyle - but I guess there is nothing I can do about it.

Thanks for keeping your concerns for me.

I have a long weekend with my Daughter and mother - Thurs and Fri vacation days to go to the Finger Lakes - my mother has a canoe and use of a friend's cottage. Then home on Sat and Sun with my daughter - I'll have to think of things to do.


Me:40 / W:33 / D:3
T:7.5/M:4
D Day: 1/24/08
Legal Separated: 6/12/08
BF who sleeps over: confirmed 11/10/08
Suspect BF pre-dates D Day

http://tinyurl.com/Original-thread
http://tinyurl.com/Second-thread
http://tinyurl.com/Third-thread

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Originally Posted By: Ready2Change
Any links to the PDF?


Faith e-mailed PDF to me after I called him


Me:40 / W:33 / D:3
T:7.5/M:4
D Day: 1/24/08
Legal Separated: 6/12/08
BF who sleeps over: confirmed 11/10/08
Suspect BF pre-dates D Day

http://tinyurl.com/Original-thread
http://tinyurl.com/Second-thread
http://tinyurl.com/Third-thread

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Ya this double life thing is interesting......We just need to deal with where we are at this moment in time......

Do you have an anonymous place on the internet you could post the PDF (if you thin it would be helpful) and give us a link?

Thanks and "Enjoy today!"


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
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I have experienced the double life weirdness as well. It's hard to shift over, but once you do, it's hard not to relax and enjoy yourself. I look at it as a way to give myself a break from the sitch. Not only that, but I realized how healthy it was for myself. It is something I will continue to do regardless of how things work out with my W. Maybe not as often, for sure, but from time to time.


Married 6 years
D4
D4
S2
seperated: 7/15/08
Dbomb: 9/21/08
status: seperated in same home, meeting with mediator moving toward D
current thread
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Posts: 4,035
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Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11)
Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t
Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10
Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 365
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OP Offline
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Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 365
Out of the blue, my W yesterday was screaming at me for spreading lies about her having an affair though the grapevine at her work. Said that I hurt her enough and she has a reputation to keep.

After digging into it - I found out that my asking a former co-worker of hers a full 6 months ago if he thought she was seeing someone and that is the reason she wants a divorce. Well yesterday her boss told her that I was spreading rumors about her.

I told her that I did inquire of someone whether she was having an affair 6 months ago... a former worker who had left the company and was through a recent dovirce himself. But the fact that it is coming up now tells me that other people are talking about it for some other reason like seeing my W with someone else.

W says it is all lies... We are Legally Separated - so she says she can do anything she wants and it's not an affair (Yet we are still legally married)

I said that I have nothing to do with any rumors going around now - but suggested that if she wants the rumors to stop, she could dump her boyfriend and return to her husband and daughter and be a family again.

She replied that she does not have a boyfriend - only went on a couple of dates (All lies)and that I was never part of her family - only her daughter was her immediate family.

My W's mind is so twisted. She firmly believes she is doing the right thing - if she is happy she will be a better mother, and best to get as far away from me as possible.

More than 3 months into the separation and nothing has improved.. She continues to be angry at me over anything she feels like.

I am still working on getting a life and not pushing my W's buttons - but things keep getting her angry. Spend quality time with my Daughter whenever I have her - but I still cannot get over the fact that I will be able to be with my daughter for less than half time for decades to come.


Me:40 / W:33 / D:3
T:7.5/M:4
D Day: 1/24/08
Legal Separated: 6/12/08
BF who sleeps over: confirmed 11/10/08
Suspect BF pre-dates D Day

http://tinyurl.com/Original-thread
http://tinyurl.com/Second-thread
http://tinyurl.com/Third-thread

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Posts: 283
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Hey Singledad, you are not alone. My wife accused me a couple of times of talking about her and "begging" her family members to help me. I have never asked any of them for anything, only told 2 of them what the situation was and that I wanted to work things out.
There is nothing we can do about it, they will believe what they want to believe, all you can do is be truthful and it sounds like you handled it the best way you could.
My W also gets angry with me over many things, though since we are moving toward mediation, she does seem to be taking things in stride more than before.

As far as time with your daughter, that is tough, but you need to adjust your focus to the time you DO spend with her rather than the time you DON'T. Fill up the time you don't have her GALing and focusing on you. It is depressing to know that things will change, but you have to accept this as reality. Do you have an IC? Do you talk to them about it?

Hang in there buddy, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. You are in a tough spot now but it WILL get better, one way or the other, you have to believe that.


Married 6 years
D4
D4
S2
seperated: 7/15/08
Dbomb: 9/21/08
status: seperated in same home, meeting with mediator moving toward D
current thread
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