Would anyone be interested in participating in a "7-Steps Aerobics" program, where we take each of the 7 steps of the Divorce Remedy book, and work through them, in depth, a week or two at a time?
Just a thought, let us know if you might want to do this, and any suggestions you might have.
All you'll need is the book, and a desire to work the program!!! We'll provide the "trainers", you will provide the "intestinal fortitude"!!
Who's game for this?
JJ
Read about Divorce Busting® Telephone Coaching here!
I replied on the other link, but you didn't list me, so I'm not sure if you got it, but would love to participate. If you would mind taking a look at my last post, in Newcomer's, under I feel like I'm losing my mind, I need help and give me any feedback on your feelings or thoughts, I would greatly appreciate it. I haven't heard from WAH in several weeks. I just don't understand his behavior vs. his words. Thanks!
Please include me. I've been reading and applying the DR for a week and it is hard to stay focused and committed. I'll do anything to keep him, I'll try it all. Please let me participate, give me hope.
Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.... (thoreau)
Wow, this is great!! I had no idea so many people would be interested in doing this! This is incredibly wonderful!!
Guess I better get busy putting some stuff together to get started, right?! I'll try to get enough lined out so we can get started maybe next week.
If you don't have the book yet, you can order it from here The Divorce Remedy or any other book store. I believe that most libraries have them to borrow too.
How exciting! Can't wait to get started!!!
JJ
Read about Divorce Busting® Telephone Coaching here!
I feel that I get lost in the every day stuff to hold true & stay on track sometimes...
I'm going to pick up a 3rd copy of DR & a new set of highlighters just for this! (I gave my 1st highlighted copy to my MIL & will give the 2nd copy to my daughter to reference)
do we need to pick up a new sweat suit & sneaks to do this work out?
Should I post here as well? does that count as a double membership? or maybe 1 for me and the wife that don't care? lol She claims she carried the ball for so long so I guess its up to me now
"I can't see the end but maybe it's just past the clouds a short way up...not sure.
"fine baby..be mad at me..if you didn't love me you wouldn't be mad because
YOU WOULDN'T CARE.."
There's really no specific format layed out for this, just kinda figured we'd play it by ear! So, feel free to post any thoughts, questions, or comments you have surrounding the steps, and we'll see where it goes from there!! You know, that "butterfly effect" thing!
We'll just take it one step at a time, and spend maybe a week or two on each step.
Are we ready?!
JJ
Read about Divorce Busting® Telephone Coaching here!
I couldn't be more ready. I'm living the roller coaster with my EA/MLC H who is still living in. I am 'winging it' with the steps as near as I can tell, but a little specific direction and positive feedback would be GREAT!!!! Where do we start?
Would you mind looking at my posts for the past couple of days on my thread Feel like I'm losing my mind... I need help? I would appreciate any input you have. Also, when WAH has gone dark on me and Ss, how do you set goals for that? I haven't even spoken to WAH in a couple of weeks, but it's been much longer since we've seen him or had any contact, except about 3 or 4 weeks ago, when he had his temper-tantrum. I am feeling more secure in myself as a person, but I still feel very lost as a wife, because I have no clue what H wants. I know to detach and try not to care about sit, but I do care, and I don't know how I can make any headway w/ my M or R if I never see WAH. Thanks for taking your time to check on me.
Quote: How SURE are you about things that are going to happen? we can never be SURE of anything...or rather as they say the only things certain in life are death and taxes
How much do you rely on the past, and the present, to predict the future? Especially about the "negative" things?
oh far to much, I sit and wonder or rather try to gage with some fictional meter, mmmm was h doing this or that then? sets me up for real trouble and gets me making a whole lot of assumptions that are typically negative
How would you see the situation you're in from an outsider's point of view? What if you were a third-party looking at the events that are going on in your life? How might you see things differently? this is a tough one. sometimes I think that if I were listening to a friend tell the same story I am living I would see more positive than I do on my own, but (yes I know LL's infamous but) there are also times when I would look at my sit and say either suck it up or get out.
If you were to read your story on the board like it was someone else's thread, what would you post to yourself? What advice would you give to you? How well would you take that advice?!
well I would tell myself to look how far we've come, focus on the positives, recognize what has worked in the past and stick to it, stay responsible for your own happiness, stop blaming yourself for h's indiscretions, and a whole lot more. would I take that advice? depends on how big the 2x4 was
last night I went to the c alone...I hadn't gotten a sitter and felt I could use the time alone with c to let out some fears that only seem to frustrate h so alone I went. As I sat there semi-complaining about things I did take a step back and ask out loud if the things that have happend didn't happen (affair and seperation threat of d etc) would I be happy with the way the r is going now and I couldn't answer or maybe was just afraid to answer what if the answer would still be no? is it even possible to put out the past that completely?
so then my question I suppose is how to piece after the initial piecing? when the "pressure" seems to be off the was to "win" you back again is gone and things seem to drift back toward that dangerous comfort zone?
what to do with a partner who isn't "active" in the piecing proccess.
How to heal on your own (without need for reassurance from returned was)
