AAARRRGGHHHH I am so going to beat my D16! I called to find out why she was not home from school yet. She is hanging out with a F and F's BF. Told her the sitch with deployment and basically, got "so what I have plans."
I told her that was fine, if she wantedto be a brat, so be it. She is the one that will have to live with her decision if her dad cannot get off the ship when it pulls back in after the storm.
SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
I agree. You can't force her to be there. It may even be good if she isn't there with a bad attitude. I know that sounds bad, but it could be worse. She could be there and tell him off like my S did with his Father and you would have an awful evening.
Sorry, girl.
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
I got "Well, if he wanted to spend time with us that bad, he should stayed home last week." So you are probably right that it is better she is not home. It jsut irks me that she shows so little respect. This is her stepfather--he has provided for her since she was 2!--when her real father would not. H has NEVER treated her any differently than he has the other kids. Plucks my nerves that she is so rude sometimes.
SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
hey, sorry to hear about the earlier departure. that does suck.
I think it's best that your d16 not be there either, if she'll have a bad attitude. Plus, it might also get him thinking why she wouldn't be there. you do reap what you sow.
can't wait to hear if the nightie thing worked out or not. don't let it get you down if it doesnt, it might be too much to handle for him all at once like that. and not matter what the reaction (unless it's really bad, but I'd have to hear it first) you better land that sensual kiss on him before he heads off. They may reject you, but it doesn't mean they don't WANT it.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
(((SMW))) reading along, & hoping for the best !! You're a sweetie, & deserve a break here !
Hugs
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
If you aren't already, please be praying for SMW tonight! She needs a little extra help tonight, and I'm sure she'll be in tomorrow morning to fill us all in on her sitch!
Amy
Me 39 H 36 S 7 S 4 T 15 M 12 H out 8/1/08 OW confirmed 8/6/08 D final on 6/12/09...I'm doing good!
I left my house for two hours last night to pray and seek comfort from friends, as I was so sad about the changes in H's deployment schedule and the fact that my best friend is leaving and I felt like I could not be sad in my own home about him leaving. I knew that I was not ready to pursue ML with him--I am unable to achieve detachment for that area of my marriage.
My husband actually slept in our bed last night. When I came back home, D8 was trying to sleep on the sofa because she said her Daddy's alarm always wakes her up. I wnrt into H and asked what time we had to be up to head to the pier. When he told me 3:15, I suggested he sleep upstairs so that D8 could get some sleep in her own bed. I told him I would sleep on the sofa.
When he came upstairs, I was grabbing my nighclothes, my bible and devotionals, a pillow, my stuffed dog(H gave him to me to comfort me when he was gone, years ago) and my blanket. H asked where I was going, I told him to the sofa, so that neither of us would be uncomfortable. He seemed shocked, but did not stop me. I will be honest, I laid out there and prayed he would come and tell me to come into bed with him. I did not want to push things, I wanted it to be HIS choice, not my forcing him to accept it. He did not, but I do not think either of us slept much last night. I heard him tossing and turning all night and he got up several times.
This morning, I drove him to the pier and knew it was still not the right time for him to hear all that was on my heart. Amy, it was not right, and like we talked about last night, I would know if it was the right time. I am going to finish the letter today, in between prayers. It WILL be said, though, before he leaves for deployment, and the letter will merely serve to reinforce it. As I will tell him, it is for those times he ever doubts whether or not I can or have forgiven him and he is unable to get that reassurance directly from me.
He hugged me pierside, told me he would see me in a couple of days, and headed to the ship. I cried and prayed all the way home. God is working, now i need to show Him that I am, too.
sg--
Thank you for telling me about HM's thread. I am in with you guys. For those of you who are interested, HM has proposed a day of fasting and prayer today. With the current situation in my marriage, I am feeling a need to step things up a bit--to push the envelope, so to speak. If you decide to join us, wonderful! Know that there are always people whom I pray for specifically and I will continue that today.
Here is the prayer I posted on HM's thread:
Holy Father, we exalt you and recognize your authority over all in the seen and unseen world. We know the promise You have given us and understand that our trials are merely for a season, but the glory of your Word lives forever. It is on the authority that you have given us, through the sanctified blood of Your son Jesus, that we come to you this day in fast and prayer. We beseech you to look favorably upon your children that are gathered together globally, praying in unison for healing and restoration.
Because we fully realize that we can not enter into battle alone, we entreat you to stand with us, as you did with Nehemiah at the walls of Jerusalem. Much like the faithful there, we too are builders for the body of Christ, builders of faith in a broken world. We pray, as Nehemiah did:
"Hear us O God, for we are despised. Turn their insults back on their own heads. Give them over as plunder in a land of captivity. Do not cover up their guilt or blot out their sins from Your sight, for they have thrown insults in the face of the builders." Neh. 4:4,5
We ask that you convict our spouses and the OP in our marriages. Convict them of the sin they do against you and the covenant promise that was shared at the altar when our marriage vows were made. Draw back the scales from their eyes and open their ears. Allow them to see, hear, and understand the full magnitude of the sinful life they choose over Your will, Father. May you move swiftly within their hearts and minds, and allowing the hedge of thorns to be come impenetrable between them and around the families that are being attacked. We praise you in advance of your Grace, knowing full well that with you all things are possible. May our mustard seed faith be enough to move this mountain of adultery and sin, casting it forever into the oceans of Hell and back upon its evil master, to trouble our hearts and lives no more. We ask this in the name of your Risen Son, Jesus Christ, Amen.
SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
and not matter what the reaction (unless it's really bad, but I'd have to hear it first) you better land that sensual kiss on him before he heads off. They may reject you, but it doesn't mean they don't WANT it.