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#1545182 - 08/04/08 12:23 PM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: glamgirl]
glamgirl Offline
Member

Registered: 04/28/07
Posts: 3481
NLT you will get beyond the lunches. I know that I used to look forward to my day when h would call and it would break up the workday. Now there is nothing. Only on Wed and Sun he calls at work, because he is watching the kids.

Calls for stuff like can you pick this up from the store or what should we have for dinner. Never I love you and miss you.

Sometimes I wonder if that ever crosses his mind!
_________________________
Me 50
H 42
S 22
S 9
D 7
M 12
T 17
H moved out 8/2006
H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks
H moved home 5/2011 for good

"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"

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#1545658 - 08/04/08 05:53 PM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: glamgirl]
happynow Offline
Member

Registered: 02/25/08
Posts: 2099
Hi glamgirl,

I know what you mean!! Those memories, plus the phone calls! He used to call me so many times a day, I just miss him so bad.

I do feel like I've been getting signs. But then again I don't know for sure.

I'm back at home now & got the alimony check. I was hoping he would say something about my birthday, I really didn't expect him to but I was hoping. He didn't. But, he did put in confirmation of life ins. policy he has to keep me as beneficiary on, he said he would reduce as we went along on the alimony but he hasn't yet, it just shows what he had already sent me in April, don't know why he sent it again unless he doesn't remember sending it. Then he put a $5.00 bill in there with a note that said:

Postage for the DVD controller. Could not find controller for small TV.

That was it. Didn't say anything else. I realy didn't expect to get any money for the postage. I didn't ask him for any & I didn't withhold it out of the stimulus check that I sent him. So, I don't know.


Edited by nlt (08/04/08 05:55 PM)

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#1545667 - 08/04/08 06:04 PM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: happynow]
MidwesternGirl Offline
Member

Registered: 01/16/06
Posts: 7941
Loc: SW USA
I will be honest and tell you that while in mlc, they rarely acknowledge a birthday (mine never did but he did the kids. You get used to it and think of it as just another day.

You will get thru this but for now have zero expectations with regard to his contacting you. But keep up your prayers because it is only God who will work on him.
_________________________
The Bomb: 08/05
H moves out: 06/2006
H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07
H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08
H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09
Divorced 08-12
Kids: 22, 20, 19

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#1545766 - 08/04/08 07:19 PM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: happynow]
Truelove Offline
Member

Registered: 12/29/05
Posts: 3334
Hi nlt,
I am sorry your H did not acknowledge your b'day. Steelers had a good point there. Have a nice day.

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#1545803 - 08/04/08 07:53 PM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: Truelove]
happynow Offline
Member

Registered: 02/25/08
Posts: 2099
SF & True,

Thank you for checking in on me & your advice. I know, I really didn't expect to hear from him for my b'day I had just hoped.

I keep praying, I do feel like God has shown me some signs, I hope it was signs anyway. I'm not sure but I hope so.

I really couldn't believe my H sent that 5.00 to pay for the postage for me sending him that remote. I didn't ask him to. That was nice of him to do that, not sure why he did it or even thought about it. He doesn't usually think about stuff like that.

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#1546050 - 08/04/08 11:17 PM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: happynow]
happynow Offline
Member

Registered: 02/25/08
Posts: 2099
My BIL called me again tonight, he wasn't as friendly as he was the other night. He said that he was not going to my parents house tomorrow b/c it was too far just to get the bed frame. He thought he was getting the cabinets also. I told him that I had told my H before Xmas that my parents were going to keep the cabinets. BIL told me that he talked to my H & my H said he didn't remember me telling him that. My BIL said that he wasn't going to argue over it that it wasn't worth it. So, I'm sure my H told him that he was supposed to get them. BIL didn't sound too happy. My parents said those cabinets are pay back for them storing them all these years for him & then he go & do me like he did. Of course H doesn't know they said that.

So, I take it my H is still upset with me.

My BIL said if my H's son wanted that bed frame that he could go get it himself & if he doesn't my parents can do what they want to with it.

I don't know that just bothered me some.

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#1546051 - 08/04/08 11:17 PM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: happynow]
plentyhope Offline
Member

Registered: 07/29/06
Posts: 3455
Originally Posted By: nlt
I'm back at home now & got the alimony check. I was hoping he would say something about my birthday, I really didn't expect him to but I was hoping. He didn't. But, he did put in confirmation of life ins. policy he has to keep me as beneficiary on, he said he would reduce as we went along on the alimony but he hasn't yet, it just shows what he had already sent me in April, don't know why he sent it again unless he doesn't remember sending it. Then he put a $5.00 bill in there with a note that said:

Postage for the DVD controller. Could not find controller for small TV.

That was it. Didn't say anything else. I realy didn't expect to get any money for the postage. I didn't ask him for any & I didn't withhold it out of the stimulus check that I sent him. So, I don't know.
n;t,
Don't expect your H to do anything for your BD. Mine acknowledged each year but didn't do anything to celebrate. Last year was different in that he got the boys to celebrate but only b/c he mentioned it to the boys and they maybe pestered him about getting me a BD present. This year he acknowledged and foloowed that immediately with his moving on speech.

I think it was a good sign that your H sent you the postage money. It shows that at least his heart is soft enough to do that. He could have been mean and think "Well, it's the least nlt could have done to mail me the remote since I am giving her so much each month and she got such a good deal out of the settlement. He also made the effort to look for the other remote and took the trouble to tell you he couldn't find it.
_________________________
PH's Thread

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#1546077 - 08/04/08 11:48 PM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: plentyhope]
happynow Offline
Member

Registered: 02/25/08
Posts: 2099
PH,

No, I really didn't expect my H to do anything for my BD, I had hoped he would acknowledge it but he didn't do that either. First time in 18 years!

Yes, I thought it was really nice of him to send that 5.00, I didn't ask him to do that. I hope he is not mad now about those cabinets but I think his mind is still in a fog & he really doesn't remember.

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#1546101 - 08/05/08 12:21 AM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: happynow]
MidwesternGirl Offline
Member

Registered: 01/16/06
Posts: 7941
Loc: SW USA
Sounds like your BIL is just disgusted over everything that has happened and if I were you, I would not take it personally.
_________________________
The Bomb: 08/05
H moves out: 06/2006
H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07
H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08
H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09
Divorced 08-12
Kids: 22, 20, 19

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#1546124 - 08/05/08 12:45 AM Re: My Heart is Breaking #6 [Re: happynow]
plentyhope Offline
Member

Registered: 07/29/06
Posts: 3455
nlt,
I meant don't even expect him to acknowledge it, especially since he's with OW, and angry. For now, give thanks for his thoughtfulness in sending you the postage and the note.

I know how easy it is to worry about being the target of their anger and blame. Just don't let it get to you or they or the Enemy will be getting exactly what they wish for.
_________________________
PH's Thread

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