I know I am supposed to love her unconditionally, but its just getting harder to do with each passing day. I think my heart is getting hard toward her and I don't like it.
no your heart is not getting hard toward her. You are just hurt and building a bit of defenses. Try not to think of the entire picture but just the small portion you are painting now.
I am going to try really hard the month of May to GAL and stay at arms length from her as much as possible. We have a family deal in June that I really enjoy going to (her extended family). My goal is to stop all R and D talk, affection, etc with her until then. At that point, we will see where we are.
I have a lot going on this month, so I should be pretty busy and that will help!
Thank you for the words of advice. I need them right now.
My goal is to stop all R and D talk, affection, etc with her until...
she brings it up...that's the answer. She is talking with you and showing you some affection...let her initiate. You don't have to 'pursue'...you will be fine...
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At that point,...
try not to put 'deadlines' on your sitch. It's hard but your feeling won't change tomorrow, so don't say if she hasn't change by tomorrow then...I think you need to reflect on your progress prior to the entire month going by but don't just stew over it every day. Sounds like you have the right perspective.
don't know what you mean...rely on yourself...I just try to be helpful. In no way, do I mean to proclaim to be right about it all. You can do it and you are doing well.
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This has got to be the hardest thing I have ever had to do!
ummm...I have no idea. Got fault papers couple Monday's back...that's not good, even if her claims are invalid. She is friendlier now then she was before. She shared about her day a couple nights back when I call for 5D schedule thing. That took like a minute, and she shared with me for like 25 minutes...who knows. We sit next to each other Saturday for 5D recital...only time will tell. In the solution journal if you want to chime in...
Sounds like yours is just as confusing as mine sometimes... I think from what I can tell, you are doing as good or better a job handling this than most people do.
I wish you the best! I don't know, but it seems like to me that she is going to have a hard time finding anyone that is going to work harder for her than you already have......
