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Know how that goes...just got to have strength...give her what she needs and wants...3 weeks is not long compared to eternity. Be strong and keep up your changes(180's).



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I am sure there are a lot of people on these boards that have the same problem. I just try to treat her as if I am courting her again, with not expectations. I dream everynight for that day when she comes back to me....

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Quote:
I just try to treat her as if I am courting her
at the moment, it would be nice to just to be able to talk to my friend again.



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I feel the exact same way. Its like my best freind and the love of my life has died and I didn't even get to say goodbye...

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Hey jmw123. I looked back at your early posts and it seems like we are in similar sitch. What is the update on yours? Have you posted one lately???

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Sdog I've been posting under my Solution Journal...I am trying really hard to set 3 good DB goals and a set of subgoals - almost guidelines - to achieve those goals.

Very short version update as you asked Sdog- I showed her 5D dance videos off my cell yesterday and we were as closes as two people can be without touching...except for our fingers grazing several times while holding/watching cell...So, that's that...no holding hands, no contacts - unless like "business", about 3 weeks of positive interactions with no negatives and no D talk for 4 weeks.



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I just read your SJ and am impressed. I tried to pm you but it would not send for some reason. I understand the grazing thing, that has happened a few times in the last few days and its a great thing!! I am lucky that my W is still in the house at this point. She has talked about leaving, but nothing yet. Seems like this week has been good. We have great conversations, we laugh and spend time with the kids, but nothing physical at all. Small steps!!!

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am impressed
why? I don't understand.

I think you can only PM moderators...just post away in my solution journal...it's not like a private diary, lmao...i just post way more there b/c it's got my name on it...rofl.

Small steps...that's exactly it...be consistent and patient. Keep up the hard work and your 180's. It does make a difference.

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I am lucky that my W is still in the house at this point.
you are. If I had known then what I do now...well...a lot of us would not be here. You have a great opportunity with the contact u2 have...gl in all you do.

gl2uall



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I am just impressed with the progress you have made and your dedication to your marriage.

Well, I have to honest. I am just about at my breaking point. Right now I am not sure if being in the same house is the best thing or not.... She has been so mean and hurtful to me this weekend! I know I have made mistakes in our relationship, but no one deserves to be treated like she has treated me over the past few months. (ofcourse we all know that she has not been the perfect angel in our relationship either, it takes two)

I have bent over backwards for her, I have given her space and time, I have been here for her and its not good enough. I could handle her being distant and trying to figure things out, but to go out of her way to just belittle and be mean, I just don't know how much I can deal with anymore. I can feel me slipping farther away from wanting this to work out and that kind of scares me a little. I deserve better treatment.

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Keep strong. It'll be worth it. My WAW was angry for at least 3 months maybe 4. She is hurt now and that is why she treats you like that. Be strong. GAL. Don't be available for the opportunity for her to be ugly.

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I have bent over backwards for her, I have given her space and time, I have been here for her and its not good enough.
perhaps you are working to hard. You say time and space but then say there for her. Seems conflicting/contradicting.

It's worth it and you know it. Don't give up. She won't be able to be mean to you forever if you are consistent and patient.

gl2u



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