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#1135743 - 07/17/07 02:25 PM Pushing along with positive thoughts 4
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
My other thread locked. Same title but #3.

Patti,

The answer is to let him contact you. At least in my case that was what I did. Don't forget everyone is different. Go with your gut!!!!

Just got back from a little pampering. I got my hair cut, colored, highlighted and it looks great!!!! I love when I do that and it was about time for something for me!!! Selfish, huh???? LOL

Y

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#1135777 - 07/17/07 02:55 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
butterflymom Offline
Member

Registered: 04/05/07
Posts: 1526
Loc: with my favoriteweirdo
yeah for being a little selfish. I think it's great! Hope things keep looking up for you YR.

BFM
_________________________
There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you.
David Burns, Intimate Connections

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#1135908 - 07/17/07 04:46 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Truelove Offline
Member

Registered: 12/29/05
Posts: 3334
Hi YR,
Glad to hear that things at your end are looking up again. You have the patience to pull this through, and in the end everything will be fine again. Take care.

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#1135948 - 07/17/07 05:26 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Truelove]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
BFM

Thanks, I think I needed to be selfish for once!!! LOL

TL

I think things will be fine for me and h. No one knows what tomorrow will bring!

Y

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#1136014 - 07/17/07 06:52 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Valeria Offline
Member

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 1002
Dear Twin:

Well, guess what I did today? Yep, hair cut, colored, highlighted and trimmed. I swear we are leading parallel lives!!

I heard from H twice last night (first time in over a month). The first call (OW was listening in) was about the D settlement. I won't agree to settle out of court, which means that OW will be subpoenaed to testify. We hung up, and a short while later, H called me back. He was much nicer, so I guess she had left in a huff like she did the last time H called me, lol!

Hugs
Val

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#1136068 - 07/17/07 08:21 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Valeria]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Twinny

You are my twin!!!!! See, we do the same things!!!!

I am glad you are holding firm in regards to your h. I know you have a very smart head on your shoulders and will do what needs to be done!!! The ow probably ran and now has her head up her butt!!!

Y

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#1136128 - 07/17/07 09:49 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Valeria Offline
Member

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 1002
YR:

The OW is the type who thinks she can control men but is scared to death of other women .. especially irate wives!! She will do anything to avoid going to court to testify. H has told me many times that she is scared of me (as well she should be). If anything will send that ho packing, it's the fear of having to testify in a courtroom. The next few weeks should be interesting.

Has your H seen your new 'do yet? I'll bet your hair looks great.

Val

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#1136218 - 07/17/07 11:24 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Valeria]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Val

No my h hasn't seen the new "do" yet. He called a few minutes ago and asked how I liked it and how it looked. I really like it....it's really soft and sensual looking! The stylist I usually go to can look at you and know what will look good on you and even takes your skin tones to get the highlights and colors that look good on you.

The ow better be scared, your h better be scared because I feel like the judge will give both of them a dressing down that they both deserve!!!!!

Y

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#1136673 - 07/18/07 12:33 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
MissH Offline
Member

Registered: 10/09/06
Posts: 5375
Loc: NY
Hi Yellow, I was wondering if you heard from Holly at all. I know she was moving but I thought she would be back on the bbs by now. I hope she is ok.
_________________________
Me:35, ex: 36
Sons: 9 & 7
Bomb: July, 2006
Divorced 2009

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#1136679 - 07/18/07 12:35 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
yeah my H said OW is very insecure and hates the mention of me. after all she did heave the cell phone against the wall when he sent her a txt meant for me! she better get used to it.

H is actually doing it....hes giving her the speech!
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


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#1136836 - 07/18/07 02:51 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Truelove Offline
Member

Registered: 12/29/05
Posts: 3334
Hi YR,
Just checking in on you. Take care.

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#1136849 - 07/18/07 02:59 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Truelove]
Cinderellaman Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/06
Posts: 7791
Hi YR, haven't checked in in a while, hear that things are looking up for you !! Enjoy the new hairstyle ! I always feel like a million bucks when I leave the hairdressers !! ENJOY !!!

Love yah !!! xxx
_________________________
Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/

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#1136996 - 07/18/07 05:01 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: MissH]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
MrsH

Holly is fine. I heard from her this morning. Her D's wedding is this weekend so she is pretty busy. I forgot to ask her if she has her cable and internet working yet.

Y

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#1136999 - 07/18/07 05:02 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Cinderellaman]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Cinders

I love the new haircut. I just wished I had the talent that my stylist has to fix it!!!! LOL

Y

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#1137005 - 07/18/07 05:04 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

I am glad he is telling the ow. Now be prepared okay???? She will try anything if she is like the ow in my case. It will take a while for him to really get over her so be very patient!!!!

Y

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#1137015 - 07/18/07 05:09 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
That is always the way huh y?
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1137019 - 07/18/07 05:12 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

They hold on for dear life but eventually when our h's really release that R things change with the ow. Make any sense??? I don't want to scare you I just want you to be prepared.

Y

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#1137032 - 07/18/07 05:17 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
I have told myself that his feelings in his altered state were real to him, there for he will be sad in some form. I expect her to be a crazed cow who doesnt take it lightly..well could she at 200+


Edited by a new 2moro (07/18/07 05:18 PM)
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1137109 - 07/18/07 06:39 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
Was2sad Offline
Member

Registered: 09/30/05
Posts: 6226
I think the letting go of the OP is more than just the letting go of the A partner. The MLC-WAS really believed they were falling for someone else, enough to justify taking the huge leap of faith.

When they see it was not what they thought or not what they now desire, they feel many things, including foolish maybe. But they could be hurting someone else now as much as they were hurting you before. Remember how we say the MLCer hates feeling guilty so they re-write history and bash the LBS into believing there was never any love?

Well now the MLCer is not crazy. Now they are quite alert and aware of the pain or anger they are going to cause their LB-OP. Just because they are no longer MLC does not mean they won't hate feeling the guilt or sharing the pain. They will also of course remember those times when they believed they had found nirvanna in MLC. Back in the real world, they will miss nirvanna. The OP is just one part of what they are having to leave behind in order to return to reality.

I think it does take some time for them to feel comfortable with their return, and to feel safe loving and being loved again. Think about how much trouble they have recently had in getting that part right. They don't want to fail again. They don't want to hurt again. They don't want to feel guilty again.

Let's see, what will the MLCer feel safe feeling? What can you do to create some safe contact and communications? The OP will not be trying to do this. They will be trying to do those things we did wrong ... begging, screaming (if you did that :)), and reasoning. I can just hear them repeating to the MLCer of how unhappy they were in the M and how unhappy they will be again. They may be reasoning that being unhappy forever is not worth trying to keep the family together. And of course I assume there will be repeated cries of "what about me?"

Your MLCer will have no more good answers to this than he did to any of your original questions after the bomb. The good news is, he is your MLCer and you will do the right things. Give time and space, unconditional love and comfort ... and boundaries.


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#1137129 - 07/18/07 07:01 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Was2sad]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
well put w2s...thanks for the perspective...it was very enlightening. what about the fact that nirvana had been missing from the OP for a while? I wasnt trying to make lite of my H's feelings. Im sure it was hard for him to do. I expect to see him sad. There should or would be a withdrawal. Im hoping he will share with me any sadness he feels. I cant make it go away but i can him know i understand. I said before he started i knew it was going to be hard and I understood that.
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1137177 - 07/18/07 08:22 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Was2sad]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
W2S

Thank you for that. I think my h is almost there with letting go of the ow. He said now he thinks about her once in a while but each day it is easier. It has been almost 7 months since he let her go with no contact in person since January and only a limited comtact by phone to tell her to leave him alone.

He is doing well and really trying.......finally!

Y

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#1137225 - 07/18/07 09:25 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
YR thats wonderful, I will need your help to get thru this. those were great words by w2s. H was out tonite and a little funky acting.....but we'll get there.
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1137307 - 07/18/07 11:51 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

Just like Snodderly told me, this part is going to take alot of patience and time. You have gotten this far. We will help each other through this. We can do it!!!!

Y

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#1137490 - 07/19/07 10:01 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
thanks Y...I so will need your help to stay calm
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1138148 - 07/19/07 08:49 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
hey YR, i got my 2nd ILY on the phone today and he was calmer when he was out tonite....my GF was there and noticed how dif he looked even from a few months ago.
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1138279 - 07/19/07 11:25 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
heartbreak2 Offline
Member

Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 403
Loc: southeast
YR
Glad that your H is doing so well with the letting go of OW.

This is a huge problem for mine.
W2S thank you so much for that post it is so true.
mine said in Feb..."I feel guilty for leaving the kids and I feel guilty for hurting the person I was with"
I did not know at the time that she had dumped him....
yet he was feeling guilty?? makes no sense at all!!

The part about being ashamed. I read somewhere that if they never get over that there is a chance they can never reconnect with us. Do you think this happens?

so the break up is hard on them and N2M sending you and your H lots of strength to get through this. Give him all that safety and security and a soft place to land when he starts to fall.
Be that loving wife who is not nagging at him but supporting him and comforting him. You are doing great and I am taking notes... hope to get the chance to use them!!

thanks all
hb2
_________________________
m24 yrs
h 50
me 47
s 21
s 17
left 5-30-06, and 12-4-06
still gone.............

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#1138313 - 07/20/07 12:18 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: heartbreak2]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
hb

Just hang in there, my friend. It's a long hard road and I am still hanging in there!

Patti, I wished I heard those words!! Good for you!

Y

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#1138333 - 07/20/07 12:44 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
YR ...did you ever get a panic attack about OMG is this what I want????? It was like what if we are 2 dif...what if what if.....i did myself in. Im OK now. It was weird.

Oh yeah...this is dumb too......what about sex again? Do you just know when it is right?

H actually wants to tell one of our friends....a GF maybe more my friend cos she rides my horses.....but she had no clue about what i was going thru so she was very pro-D....i was actually putting off telling her. I didnt have the nerve ! H said let me have this one! huge surprise there.
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1138515 - 07/20/07 09:33 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

I answer to your question, yes I did say to myself is this what I want. Then I thought back to all those wonderful years and memories that we shared together and I knew it was so very right. You will get those feelings. Remember I posted not to long ago that my feelings had changed for my h. They weren't as strong as before. They are still there but very guarded!!!

Y

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#1138528 - 07/20/07 09:48 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
Ok so Im normal phew.....the rollercoaster doesnt stop yet. He actually talking about moving stuff out....good sign...I just let him set the pace.
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1138530 - 07/20/07 09:50 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
Cinderellaman Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/06
Posts: 7791
Oh Patti, the suspense is KILLING ME !!!!!!

I am so thrilled for you, and I really, really, really wish that I will one day be as cool, calm and collected as you and H finds his way back to that !

YR, in need of some fairydust across the pond I think !!! xxxxx

Love you both !!!
_________________________
Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/

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#1138569 - 07/20/07 10:35 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Cinderellaman]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
you CAN do it Cinders!
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1138576 - 07/20/07 10:48 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
Cinderellaman Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/06
Posts: 7791
I sure hope so !
_________________________
Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/

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#1138578 - 07/20/07 10:48 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
kikifree Offline
Member

Registered: 01/30/06
Posts: 2114
I think it is great that YR and you are going on similar paths. It is like having an accountability partner.

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#1138601 - 07/20/07 11:18 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: kikifree]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
kiki

Yes, it is. We have to keep each other on forward paths and pull each other off the brink!!! LOL

Y

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#1138604 - 07/20/07 11:19 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Cinderellaman]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Cinders

*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'**'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'
'**''*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*''**'*''*'*'*'*'**'*
*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*''***''*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'
Hows that????? I know it will happen for you!!!

Y

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#1138605 - 07/20/07 11:21 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

Yep, let him set the pace. It will happen, no pressure, okay???

Y

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#1138645 - 07/20/07 11:53 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
Hes moving stuff out....i told him in an email he need s to tell me about contact that i can deal.....he said OK if im sure i can deal....I said i can deal.....truth works.
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1138737 - 07/20/07 01:03 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

There you go!!!

Y

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#1139037 - 07/20/07 06:09 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Truelove Offline
Member

Registered: 12/29/05
Posts: 3334
Hi YR,
Thanks for checking in on me. - Have a lovely week-end.

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#1142972 - 07/25/07 04:07 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Truelove]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Hi everyone! Missed you!!

Everything is going will with me and h. I see inprovements everytime he comes over on his days off. He is more open but the ILY's haven't came back yet. I know they will.

He has been going faithfully to his C. She even bought him a journal. He talks about his C appts sometimes but I don't ask him unless he wants to share. I think it is so much better with him coming over on his days off and taking it slow. We enjoy each other so much and when he isn't here he calls me a couple of times a day. He is really trying to regain my trust and that's all I can ask for for now.

I feel in my gut we will make it and I think he is rounding the bend and making great strides!

Y

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#1143016 - 07/25/07 04:22 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
butterflymom Offline
Member

Registered: 04/05/07
Posts: 1526
Loc: with my favoriteweirdo
Yeah. So happy for you. You give me hope!

BFM
_________________________
There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you.
David Burns, Intimate Connections

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#1143083 - 07/25/07 04:46 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: butterflymom]
Cinderellaman Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/06
Posts: 7791
Originally Posted By: butterflymom
Yeah. So happy for you. You give me hope!

BFM


Yep same here !!!! Haven't been here in a while, I forgot how much calmness and hope you always brought me ! Thankx ! Keep going, I wish you the very very best !!!
_________________________
Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/

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#1143151 - 07/25/07 05:26 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Valentine Offline
Member

Registered: 05/01/06
Posts: 3848
Loc: TEXAS, USA
Yellow this is great!!!! Same thing happening over here too!!!

Calls during the day...texts at night or phone calls at night...but going slow...

Trust is hard to build and it is best to move slowly this time...

Good things come to those who wait.....

Hugs,
Vali
_________________________
Aug '06: H moved out
July '08: H had a kid with the OW
May 12 '09: emancipation day

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller


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#1143169 - 07/25/07 05:37 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: butterflymom]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
BFM

I waivered so many times and so did my h during this. I am finally feeling alot more comfortable with things after almost 2 and half years! Don't give up hopem give it up to God and let him work on your h!!!!

Y

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#1143171 - 07/25/07 05:37 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Valentine]
Cinderellaman Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/06
Posts: 7791
VALI !!!! YES YES YES !!! Please tell me that you may be becoming a success story of a restored marriage !!

Keep us posted !!!
_________________________
Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/

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#1143174 - 07/25/07 05:38 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Was2sad Offline
Member

Registered: 09/30/05
Posts: 6226
You girls better stop making me cry!

((( )))

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#1143177 - 07/25/07 05:39 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Cinderellaman]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Cinders

Thank you!! i need to catch up on threads. I have been so busy with refinishing my cabinets in the kitchen I don't have much time.

I am glad I give you calmness. You are going to be okay!

Y

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#1143179 - 07/25/07 05:41 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Valentine]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Vali

So your h is finally slinking out of the tunnel is he??? LOL

That is a good sign. You know enough to know that slow is better. I have you in my prayers for the future you deserve with your h!!

Y

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#1143180 - 07/25/07 05:42 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Was2sad]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
W2S

Please don't cry!!! LOL If you do just make it tears of happiness!

Y

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#1143401 - 07/25/07 09:21 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
YR, glad things are good.....i get ILY's sound kinda fast aand forced but they come. i hope we get to counseling.....i keep worrying hes gonna run back to cow and the tunnel. we say H is on probation....heh heh
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


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#1143463 - 07/25/07 10:27 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
peacetoday Offline
Member

Registered: 04/15/07
Posts: 2588
Seeing other H come back is totally inspiring..gives hope that maybe it can happen to more of us
peace
_________________________
married 14 years
H 42
bomb 2/07 IDLYA
D final 3 /09
M ow

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#1143681 - 07/26/07 08:53 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: peacetoday]
mopsey821 Offline
Member

Registered: 05/15/06
Posts: 507
YR:
I have followed your threads for over a year but have never posted to you before. I am so happy for you. Patience is paying off. If you ever get a free moment and can check out my thread, I would love your opinion. Part of me feels like H is inching but I am so skeptical.

God bless you and your family.

Mopsey

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#1143813 - 07/26/07 11:10 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

He will do it, he will be home but don't forget that this is just another part of the journey. Be very patient and understanding at this point and don't pressure him.

You will get to C, he knows this is a part of his probation! LOL

Y

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#1143817 - 07/26/07 11:13 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: peacetoday]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Peace

I am so grateful that my h has finally getting there. It takes alot of time patience and understanding on our part. They are way out there in a far away place. This board has helped me so much to find myself and to understand what my h has been going through. I really think that this has made all the difference.

Y

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#1143819 - 07/26/07 11:13 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: mopsey821]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Mopsey

Thank you, I will check out your thread.

Y

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#1144203 - 07/26/07 04:09 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Truelove Offline
Member

Registered: 12/29/05
Posts: 3334
Hi YR,
I am so happy for you that all your hard work will finally pay off. You are doing so well. Take care.

If you have time, could you please have a look at my thread? I think I blew it completely. But I also think that there was no hope anymore. Whatever I would have done would not have made any difference. Thanks a lot.

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#1144265 - 07/26/07 05:04 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Truelove]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
TL

I will pop over to your thread.

Y

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#1144335 - 07/26/07 06:52 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Truelove Offline
Member

Registered: 12/29/05
Posts: 3334
Hi YR,
Thanks for your comment on my thread. I think you are right. Take care.

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#1144865 - 07/27/07 10:19 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Truelove]
ACJ Offline
Member

Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 5369
Loc: England
YR just catching up. Things still sound good for you and H. Thanks for the fairy dust on my thread
_________________________
Me 43
XH 45
M 2.7.88
Divorce 7.10.09
Kids D20,S17 & D15

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#1144911 - 07/27/07 10:47 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: ACJ]
Valeria Offline
Member

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 1002
YR:

I'm so glad that things keep looking up for you. I know it will all work out.

My D is still scheduled for mid-September. It's funny, though. H has started to call a lot more lately. He asked me last week how badly he has hurt the kids. He's stopped being vindictive, and even told me I could have the boat (we were having a "custody" battle over the boat, lol!). It's only a small glimpse of the old H, and I don't think it will last, but it's nice to have some normal conversations with H again.

Hugs to you
Val

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#1145283 - 07/27/07 04:21 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Valeria]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Val

Thanks, I think me and h will be fine, just trying to get there is the whole thing!lol

Isn't it funny that your h is calling more often?????? I still say that things might turn around but all of that is entirely up to you now, not him. It will all come crashing down on him shortly like a ton of bricks on what he has done to his family. I feel sorry for him.

I just wanted to tell you how strong I think you are and what a great job you have done. You have had so many ups and downs with your h, alot more than I have and you have held it together!!!

Hugs to you too!

Y

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#1145318 - 07/27/07 04:45 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Cinderellaman Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/06
Posts: 7791
YR, if you think back....can you give up a glimpse of what happened when H started turning around...it's SO HARD to find in the old threads and maybe it's easier for you to summarize...if you have the time of course...What was going through YOUR mind, YOUR life ...and HOW or WHY did your H make a re-entry ....

Maybe it's not possible to answer - just wondering !
_________________________
Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/

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#1145333 - 07/27/07 05:12 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Cinderellaman]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Cinders

What I remember is that h started reaching out about March or April 2006. He sat at my kitchen table sobbing and saying he was sorry and very confused.

This is when the touch and goes started. He was home for 2 weeks and at the ow's the other two weeks without warning. He would be very anxious when he was here but every time he came and went I would see baby steps and progress.

This went on for a couple of months and then he kind of withdrew. Then he was home for 5 weeks in August of 2006. In September he got a room at the barracks at the prison where he works. In my mind I think this was the most important part of my h's journey. He was distancing himself from the ow but still had contact with her. The contact got less and less. He had time to think when he was by himself.

In November 2006 he called me sobbing so hard that I could hardly understand him. Mind you my husband doesn't cry. He told me that he had made a C appt because he couldn't stand it anymore. He goes every week still which I believe it really has helped him go through this.

As you know he moved back in January but still kept his room at the barracks and just dressed there for work. Things were going fantastic but I would say around the middle of May he started acting distant again and I felt like he was going to leave again. I also thought there was contact with the ow because of his actions and I was right. He hasn't seen her since January but there was VM's from her and he didn't return her calls. He discussed this with his C and she told him to talk to her the next time so he could tell her to leave him alone. There hasn't been any more contact.

When h left this last time he felt like he moved to quickly and wanted to take it slower this time. He comes over on his 3 days off and stays at the barracks when he is working. He calls me everyday at least once.

He is doing very well and has come a long way. He still has a ways to go but I think we will make it.

I hope this makes sense to you and isn't too long!!!!

Hugs

Y


Edited by yellowrose (07/27/07 05:14 PM)

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#1145338 - 07/27/07 05:19 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Cinderellaman Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/06
Posts: 7791
It makes perfect sense thanks !! Also I think a lot of newbies will like to read this story of yours !

As you know, I wish you the very best and know that you have the love and patience to get through this !!!

Kisses xxx
_________________________
Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/

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#1145436 - 07/27/07 07:15 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Cinderellaman]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Thanks Cinders!!!

Y

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#1145987 - 07/28/07 06:38 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Truelove Offline
Member

Registered: 12/29/05
Posts: 3334
Hi YR,
Have a lovely week-end. HUGS

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#1146219 - 07/29/07 06:38 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Truelove]
ACJ Offline
Member

Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 5369
Loc: England
Finally read through all of this thread. It seems like others are now starting to follow in your footsteps and that is such good news.
_________________________
Me 43
XH 45
M 2.7.88
Divorce 7.10.09
Kids D20,S17 & D15

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#1146255 - 07/29/07 09:43 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Valentine Offline
Member

Registered: 05/01/06
Posts: 3848
Loc: TEXAS, USA
YR, so glad your H is taking is slower this time...that must have been hard for you to go through....

I think things will be fine for you and him...

I am glad that you have not been negative about his coming and going...I think I would be tempted to think that way....

Hope you are having a dry weekend! Yesterday was beautiful but today I woke up to thunder and it is drizzling outside...

Hugs,
Valentine
_________________________
Aug '06: H moved out
July '08: H had a kid with the OW
May 12 '09: emancipation day

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller


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#1146273 - 07/29/07 10:38 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: ACJ]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Alison

I see that many h's are finding their way again. Hang in there!

Y

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#1146274 - 07/29/07 10:40 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Valentine]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Vali

It pours here every day! I am really tired of rain!!!!!

Since my h has made progress I don't mind him coming home on his days off. He has had no contact with the ow and he told me last night that even though it might seem like sometimes that he isn't trying he said that he really is. I told him last night that I want our life back and he said he did too!

Y

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#1146405 - 07/29/07 02:21 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
nickyf Offline
Member

Registered: 09/22/06
Posts: 710
Loc: uk
YR

I am so happy that things are moving along for you, i can see from what you write that your husband is really trying.

Hope you had a good weekend

Nicky
_________________________
Me 34
H 33
D3
together 10 years
married 2 years
Bomb 22/8/06 (I feel empty) OW involved

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#1146407 - 07/29/07 02:29 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: nickyf]
JMC Offline
Member

Registered: 05/15/07
Posts: 208
Congrats - that is great news! Good luck!
_________________________
Me: 48
Ex-W: 45
M: Nov '96, together since Oct 93
Bomb: on 10-yr anni - Nov '06
OM
Separated: mid-Feb '07
Divorced mid-July '08
One daughter - 28
XW living w/OM

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#1146433 - 07/29/07 03:26 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: nickyf]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
nicky and JMC

As you might or might not know that we have been working on this for a long while. My h seems to be finally getting it but not out of the woods yet. One day at a time one baby step at a time.

Y

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#1146615 - 07/29/07 09:39 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
Hi Y, Im back home His home living upstairs...but seems in a good mood! He already got time off from work for C appt.....w/o me reminding him!
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1146702 - 07/29/07 11:55 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

Just let me say WOOHOO!!!!!!!! You are doing fantastic. Your h seems sincere. Now there will be ups and downs be prepared. You have come so far!!!! Glad your home safe.

Y

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#1146950 - 07/30/07 10:45 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
I know there will be downs....I know we have a mountain of debt he occurred while on his trip thru the tunnel. I know he will prob have panic attacks. I had one driving home from MA after a week away and he had already moved in. Now the trinkets and toys start showing up that he got during his foray as well. I am trying to keep lips zipped about such things.
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1146981 - 07/30/07 11:09 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

My h really put a strain on our finances too during his "trip." I kept it together here and he is finally digging himself out from under his mess.

Things that the ow bought for him or things that he bought while lost in space????

Y

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#1148257 - 07/31/07 12:37 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
I think there are some of both.....things he bought...things she bought him. Things he took of mine are showing up. I didnt realize how much stuff of mine and pictures of me he took with him! Of course there are some things of mine he took that wont show up. He either pawned them or gave them to her (jewelry) Oh well sit tight., I guess. he will open up eventually.
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1148526 - 07/31/07 04:08 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
peaceful_spirit Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/07
Posts: 960
You're the best, YR!
_________________________
Married 9 years
Kids 5 and 6
Bomb 2006
H back and forth for a year
M now back on track

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#1148672 - 07/31/07 06:39 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

That is right, sit tight and see what happens. Your h has come a long way already!! You are doing fantastic!

I remember my h brought stuff in my house that the ow bought him. Cologne, stuff like that. I do know that one of the times he left with out saying anything to me and went back to the ow, the STUFF went into the trash!!

Y

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#1148675 - 07/31/07 06:43 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: peaceful_spirit]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
PS

Thank you, how are you holding up???? H is here on his days off for the week. My parents are coming the beginning of September and he is going to see if he can get some days off. I haven't seen my parents since all this stuff happened. My parents hold nothing against my h and still tell him that they love him and he is like a S to them.

Our 25th Anniversay is less than a week away. Unfortunately h has to work but maybe we can plan something later in the week! I am anxious to see how he handles this anniversart because 2 years in a row he didn't acknowledge it at all. MLCMLCMLC!!!! LOL

Y

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#1148676 - 07/31/07 06:45 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
it seems like he skipped some steps will that catch up with him later? am i worrying??? yes!
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1148699 - 07/31/07 07:24 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

Don't worry about it. Let things unfold as they will. I used to make myself sick over the worry, and there wasn't anything I could do about it.

Y

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#1148749 - 07/31/07 08:31 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Lissie Offline
Member

Registered: 07/28/07
Posts: 4626
praying for ya, Yellow

I am always praying
_________________________
Live Simply
Love Generously
Care Deeply
Speak Kindly
Leave the rest to God

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#1149183 - 08/01/07 08:25 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Lissie]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
Hi Y, H had coffee with his friend. Warren asked how things were. H said He felt sorta outa place...I said you would, you were gone a year. Warren said the same thing to him! he said i was reserved and kinda held back...i didnt know i was. Its hard cos you dont know how to act. i dont know what he wants. Did you go thru this? He thinks hes opening up when hes not really. But it does come in bits and pieces like last nite.
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1149885 - 08/01/07 04:47 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Lissie]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Lissie

I really missed you!! I am glad you are back. I am praying for all of us to make it one way or another through this.

Y

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#1149892 - 08/01/07 04:52 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patti

Yes, I went through this too. My h was uncomfortable at first. He said that he didn't feel at "home" here anymore, but as time went on he grew more comfortable. He was gone for so long that it took time for him to adjust to the "family" life again.

I held back some too. It's normal because we are so afraid to open up after all that we have been through. You will see the walls you have put up come down little by little as your h starts coming around. It does take a while and lots of hard work. We are still working on it too and it takes both of you. Hang in there it will be fine.

Y

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#1150117 - 08/01/07 08:56 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
peaceful_spirit Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/07
Posts: 960
YR,
When is your anniv? I didn't realize it was coming up.

As for your parents, mine are the same way. The love my H and hope we can work it out. I don't know about you, but my parents have been the most supportive people throughout this whole process (aside from the folks here), and they're the ones who've seen their little girl get hurt so badly.

It will be nice to have them here and have your H with them as well. It will reinforce that family feeling.

How's your D doing these days? She happy to have her dad home more often now?
_________________________
Married 9 years
Kids 5 and 6
Bomb 2006
H back and forth for a year
M now back on track

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#1150569 - 08/02/07 08:58 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: peaceful_spirit]
Valeria Offline
Member

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 1002
Hi YR:

I know that your 25th Anniversary is coming up, that is so exciting. I'm very proud of you for your strength and for getting to this point in the journey. Happy happy Anniversary!!

As for me, H has begun to call at least once, sometimes twice a week now. Only one phone call (about a week ago) I could tell he was drinking; the rest of the time he has been sober. His calls are about how badly he hurt the kids. He says he wants me to be brutally honest about it so that he "feel the pain" of his actions. He even asked about my mother last night (a first).

I do know that things are falling apart in H's family. He has cut ties with his "evil" sister and his brother won't have much to do with him anymore. OW no longer drives the truck that H bought for her but I don't have any other information about her because good SIL doesn't associate much with the family anymore. That family is a mess.

I do think H is waking up, but I don't want to speculate beyond that. He told me two weeks ago that I was the only woman he ever loved. I asked him if there was any other woman in his life that he loved (I didn't dignify the OW by calling her by name), he hesitated and then said "no .. no there's not". Of course, I take this with a grain of salt because H has lied to me a lot over the past two years.

Anyway, our calls are friendly now. The D is not mentioned anymore, even though it is hanging over our heads.

Sorry for the long hi-jack, YR.

Hugs and love to you
Val

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#1151038 - 08/02/07 01:01 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Valeria]
peaceful_spirit Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/07
Posts: 960
Val,
I am happy to hear that. YOur H is not evil. Just really messed up. I hope he continues to reach out to you. I'm glad to hear he wants to feel the pain. As well he should.

YR,
How are you today?
_________________________
Married 9 years
Kids 5 and 6
Bomb 2006
H back and forth for a year
M now back on track

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#1151059 - 08/02/07 01:08 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: peaceful_spirit]
ACJ Offline
Member

Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 5369
Loc: England
You are all so lucky to have supportive parents. Mine, especially my mother, just want me to D H and get on with my life. I know they are hurting b/c I am but I wish they could support me in the way I want them to.

Val it's so good to hear that your H too might be waking up
_________________________
Me 43
XH 45
M 2.7.88
Divorce 7.10.09
Kids D20,S17 & D15

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#1151139 - 08/02/07 01:39 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: ACJ]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
Thanks for the input YR, i need it. you have walked where i am headed
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1151162 - 08/02/07 01:57 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: ACJ]
butterflymom Offline
Member

Registered: 04/05/07
Posts: 1526
Loc: with my favoriteweirdo
Originally Posted By: ACJ
You are all so lucky to have supportive parents. Mine, especially my mother, just want me to D H and get on with my life. I know they are hurting b/c I am but I wish they could support me in the way I want them to.



Mine are the same way ACJ. They always badmouth H too. I've gotten to where I don't talk with them about it much anymore. They are starting to pi$$ me off royaly. I understand they are mad, but geez louise. Let me live my life and don't bad mouth the father of my children when my kids are around. It's not healthy for anyone. I've had to bust their chops pretty hard about that lately. It makes it tough.

BFM
_________________________
There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you.
David Burns, Intimate Connections

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#1151197 - 08/02/07 02:20 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: butterflymom]
Valentine Offline
Member

Registered: 05/01/06
Posts: 3848
Loc: TEXAS, USA
Butterfly, my dad does the same thing too about my H...he doesn't bring it up...he just calls him names...but they NEVER bad mouth him to others...

They respect my decision for standing. they've been married for 43 years and understand that marriage is very hard as they have had some hard times of their own.

Sorry for the mini-hijack Yellow!!!

I hope things are looking peachy for you and your H!!!!

Hugs,
Vali
_________________________
Aug '06: H moved out
July '08: H had a kid with the OW
May 12 '09: emancipation day

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller


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#1151507 - 08/02/07 05:02 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: peaceful_spirit]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
PS

My anniversay is on Monday. Wow 25 years!!!! I can't believe that we have made it through the last 2 and a half!!!!

He is working that day but we are going out to dinner and who knows what else!!!!

Y

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#1151511 - 08/02/07 05:04 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Valeria]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Val

It sure sounds like you h is waking up! It sounds like he is getting to the point where it all falls apart. That is what he needs, to hit that bottom!!!

At least there is more contact. I hate the D is getting closer but maybe that is what is weighing heavy on his mind right now!

Take care twinny

Y

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#1151523 - 08/02/07 05:10 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Was2sad Offline
Member

Registered: 09/30/05
Posts: 6226
Hey girl,

how 'bout you! You are holding things together and even making a milestone moment out of it. God bless you and your H. Yours will become one of those M we read about that becomes stronger by the test of fire and better than it may have been without this life challenge.

And how about the fact that is is the silver one, to go with a silver lining in all this just for you. Congrats!!!!!!


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#1151533 - 08/02/07 05:16 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Was2sad]
Mickey Offline
Member

Registered: 04/17/06
Posts: 1747
W2 you are a good man. You will find a good woman who deserves you and you her.

Mickey

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#1151634 - 08/02/07 06:50 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Was2sad]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
W2S

Thank you. We have really come a long way. H is doing well and really yrting. I feel like you do. I think my M will be a stronger one!!!

Love ya
Y

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#1151635 - 08/02/07 06:50 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Mickey]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Mickey

I agree with you. W2 deserves only the best!!!!

Y

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#1152179 - 08/03/07 10:47 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Truelove Offline
Member

Registered: 12/29/05
Posts: 3334
Hi YR,
Quote:
My anniversay is on Monday. Wow 25 years!!!! I can't believe that we have made it through the last 2 and a half!!!!
Oh, you are so lucky! I wish you all the happiness in the world and another 25 years oh HAPPY marriage! Take care and have a nice week-end. HUGS

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#1152655 - 08/03/07 05:42 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Truelove]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
almost time for you to pop in unless...youre busy....ghaads would you believe Lissie asked me what base i was on???????
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


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#1152783 - 08/03/07 08:06 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Hi Patti

Your right.....I am popping in. Everything was great on his days off. I feel so much better as time goes on. He is so much more at home now.

He took me to lunch and did alot of shopping, which is great! We hung out with the neighbors and had a great time.

So what base are you on??????? LOL

Y

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#1152787 - 08/03/07 08:08 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Truelove]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
TL

Thank you so much. I never thought I would be at this point. I never thought I would reach my 25th after these last few years. See what seemed hopeless for me turned around!!!! It can happen!

Y

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#1152833 - 08/03/07 09:00 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
geeeesh......1st base .....well slow is better right???????
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


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#1152837 - 08/03/07 09:07 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Yep!!!!!! LOL

Y

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#1152847 - 08/03/07 09:20 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
peaceful_spirit Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/07
Posts: 960
YR,
Of course you will have a stronger M. That is why you're going through all this, right? You and your H have both grown so much and you will be one of the ones in 25 years that people look at and say, "I wish I had that at 50 years of M". I have faith in the two of you.

25 years... WOW! I'm only at 7. I can't imagine what 25 feels like. I may never know. But I'm glad you do.
_________________________
Married 9 years
Kids 5 and 6
Bomb 2006
H back and forth for a year
M now back on track

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#1152858 - 08/03/07 09:34 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: peaceful_spirit]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
PS

My parents just celebrated theie 51st anniversay last month. That is such a long time. I remember they had some very rough times when I was growing up and didn't know if they would stay M but here they are growning old together!

I know my M will be stronger for all of this. I see my h growing. I know I have grown a great deal!!!

Y

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#1154564 - 08/06/07 10:43 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
ACJ Offline
Member

Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 5369
Loc: England
Just catching up. Happy Anniversary
_________________________
Me 43
XH 45
M 2.7.88
Divorce 7.10.09
Kids D20,S17 & D15

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#1154566 - 08/06/07 10:44 AM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: ACJ]
MidwesternGirl Offline
Member

Registered: 01/16/06
Posts: 7941
Loc: SW USA
Happy Anniversary and many, many more..............
_________________________
The Bomb: 08/05
H moves out: 06/2006
H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07
H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08
H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09
Divorced 08-12
Kids: 22, 20, 19

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#1154671 - 08/06/07 12:09 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: ACJ]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Alison and SF

Thank you for the Anniversary wishes!!! I can't believe it has been 25 years and we are going to make it!!!!!

H let it slip that flowers will be delivered today. He hasn't bought me flowers for a ever long time. We will celebrate this weekend since he is working and couldn't get off. He did call this morning and was very silly on the phone and wished me a happy anniversary. He is doing so well!!!!

Y

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#1154677 - 08/06/07 12:14 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Lissie Offline
Member

Registered: 07/28/07
Posts: 4626
25 years.

(sigh) I am so happy for you.

I pray always mamma.

Congratulations, and enjoy the flowers.

You deserve them and much more.

A new pair of shoes maybe.
_________________________
Live Simply
Love Generously
Care Deeply
Speak Kindly
Leave the rest to God

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#1154684 - 08/06/07 12:17 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Lissie]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Lissie

Thank you. I can't wait ot see the flowers. I was hinting toward a journey necklace, whether he got the hint I don't know. I though that would be a wonderful idea since we have been on this journey together, last few years a rollercoaster ride but the rest was a wonderful journey!!!!

I pray for you too Lissie. You are a strong woman!!!!!

Y

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#1154705 - 08/06/07 12:29 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Okay now I am boohooing!!!! The flowers just arrived. They are gorgeous. 12 red roses and other flowers in a crystal and silver vase. H put in the card that "things are only going to get better." Love, H

Need a kleenex, bbl......

Y

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#1154708 - 08/06/07 12:31 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Lissie Offline
Member

Registered: 07/28/07
Posts: 4626
I WILL NOT RUN HIM OVER.

ENJOY them !

Can you kinda smooch him from me, but don't say it is from me.

But I am proud of him.


Edited by Lissie (08/06/07 12:32 PM)
_________________________
Live Simply
Love Generously
Care Deeply
Speak Kindly
Leave the rest to God

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#1154710 - 08/06/07 12:31 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
a new 2moro Offline
Member

Registered: 08/18/06
Posts: 4738
Loc: Maine
WOW! YR that is sooooo sweet. Yes a kleenex moment. I am so happy for you.

Romance I could use a little romance.....sigh
_________________________
Me 53
H 51
OW 25
Bomb may 06
left june 8/ 06
ILYBNILWY (twice!)
7/6/07 H wants to come home
7/21/07 H comes home
7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW
now piecing in earnest


Top
#1154712 - 08/06/07 12:33 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: a new 2moro]
MissH Offline
Member

Registered: 10/09/06
Posts: 5375
Loc: NY
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!
_________________________
Me:35, ex: 36
Sons: 9 & 7
Bomb: July, 2006
Divorced 2009

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#1154819 - 08/06/07 01:47 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Lissie]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Lissie

Now that I have composed myself!!!!!! Thanks for not running him over. He is doing so well. I sneak a smooch from you on him!!!!

Patti

The romance will come. Just wait and it will tire you out!!!!

MrH

Thanks my frined!!!

Y

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#1154843 - 08/06/07 02:10 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
butterflymom Offline
Member

Registered: 04/05/07
Posts: 1526
Loc: with my favoriteweirdo
I'm so happy for you.

Happy Anniversary!

BFM
_________________________
There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you.
David Burns, Intimate Connections

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#1154854 - 08/06/07 02:20 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: butterflymom]
Cinderellaman Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/06
Posts: 7791
Happy Anniversary !!!!

To the most wonderful of all Fairy dust Fairy's in the world !!!!


Luv yah ! xxx
_________________________
Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/

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#1154984 - 08/06/07 03:58 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Cinderellaman]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
bfm and Cinders

Thank you so much. I really thought this day wouldn't get here. I thought we would be D by now after the last 2 and half years. I could picture me and h standing in fromt of a judge instead of me getting those beautiful flowers.

See there is hope, but in God's time!!!!!

Love ya all

Y

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#1155005 - 08/06/07 04:12 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Cinderellaman Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/06
Posts: 7791
OH YR,

I am SO HAPPY for you, I so wish that God has that kind of plan for me too !!! If only we could know....but then ....

"If good things are coming they will be a pleasant surprise...if bad things are, and you know in advance, you will suffer greatly before they even occur" Paulo Coelho (The Alchemist)
_________________________
Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/

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#1155066 - 08/06/07 04:54 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
Truelove Offline
Member

Registered: 12/29/05
Posts: 3334
Hi YR,
Happy Anniversary again. How wonderful to get flowers, and how lovely of your H to call you. HUGS

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#1155170 - 08/06/07 06:56 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Cinderellaman]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Cinders

God has a plan for all of us, in his own time. Detach and live for you!!!!!

Y

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#1155171 - 08/06/07 06:57 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: Truelove]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
TL

Thank you again! It was a nice surprise!!!!

Y

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#1155286 - 08/06/07 09:34 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: yellowrose]
ANewMe Offline
Member

Registered: 04/14/04
Posts: 2776
Loc: Midwest
Happy Anniversary and many, many, more. God bless you and your H.
_________________________
Everything happens for a reason, maybe Dad needs to find that it isn't better out there, he needs to realize how good he had it here. Maybe he will find God and that is the most important thing when he finds Him he will know he is supposed to come home.

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#1155298 - 08/06/07 09:48 PM Re: Pushing along with positive thoughts 4 [Re: ANewMe]
yellowrose Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/06
Posts: 6042
Loc: texas
Patty

Thank you so much. I hate coming on here when so many are hurting and I am finally getting there with my h. I remember when I was in their shoes. Like I said give it to God and let him work!!!

Y

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