Lol. Still temp checking. One Year last week she moved out. Had a first date last night that went really well so we will see. I’m picking up a buddy after work for an all guys long weekend so it should be interesting lol. Life is good my friend.
I don't know much about it but re-fi seems to be a bit of a coin toss. Here at least you would need to pay a penalty for paying out the old mortgage early plus other sorts of fees. When I bought my ex out of the house I focused on keeping the payments the same as that was what I was comfortable having in my budget. I can do lump sum payments once or twice a year I believe without any penalties.
When you get to be an old f@rt like me back issues are no joke. When I throw mine out by doing something foolish like tying my shoes it can take up to 6 weeks to get back to normal. You are a pretty fit guy so hopefully it's better quickly.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
That's awesome! Did you go for the kiss? It's hard to be vulnerable and open yourself up again. It's much different this time around. After going through the pain that we have you realize you don't need anyone and if you do find someone it's just icing on the cake.
We don't have early penalties for the paying the loan off but when you refi you do have closing costs added in your new loan. When I bought my XW out of the house I had to refi it for what we owed on it at that time plus I had to add into it her portion as well. Thankfully we had a ton of equity so I did not exceed the appraisal value but I lost my interest rate which was around 3% and my mortgage went up by about $600 per month. That really stunk!
Here in the U.S. most mortgages don't have an early payment penalty, but there are fees involved with the refinancing. If the fees are low enough to be offset by the lower interest rate it can be worthwhile. In my case, I bought 8 years ago at the bottom of the market on a 30 year fixed at a nice low interest rate. Up until now it has never made sense to refi - and still may not. BUT because of extra payments I only have 18 years left to pay and could probably refi at current interest rates into a lower interest rate 15 year mortgage for more or less the same monthly payment, which would save me 3 years of mortgage payments.
Went out with the Dr. last night, we had a few drinks, and she told me she could herself marrying me. She said she thought about it in the shower after I told her about me wanting to refi my house. Truthfully she didn't have to tell me as I could already tell by her actions. I didn't say much other than I knew she was the marrying type of the beginning which I think is part of the reason why I viewed her differently from the start.
I am in no rush so really nothing changes. I do find myself looking in the future a little bit but for the most part I try to stay in the moment. We are going out to her ranch this afternoon, going to hit up a couple of wineries, and just enjoy some country living.
She is a good person and I am lucky that our paths cross.
I remember when I was married, I always felt like I was chasing my XW. That no matter what I did it was never enough. I didn't realize it at the time but I don't know if I really understood what it is like to be comfortable in a R, where I know that other person really loves me for who I am, where I know what I am going to get every single day. I understand that it is still very early and a lot can change but it just feels very comfortable with the Dr., very natural, I don't feel like I am chasing, or having to impress, worry about what I say, I feel like I can just be me. I can do what I want, she allows me to take the lead, I feel comfortable calling her out when needed, it's just a different type of feeling.
I think over the years I really got mind fuched by my XW and it is taking some time to unpack all of that.
