Divorcebusting.com
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/03/08 04:53 PM
So, by now, you all know that H has made Chief and I am thrilled beyond belief!! I thought this would be a good time to start a new thread. Here are all of my old ones:
Never Knew Heartbreak Hurt This Bad
Haze Grey and Underway--Can We Talk
Anchors Aweigh
Man the Rails and Give no Quarter
Between the Devil and the Deep
I Always Admired the Cut of His Jib


I recieved this little thing in an email a few years ago and wanted to share it with you. I keep it framed on my desk in every house we have ever lived in.

WHY DID SHE MARRY A SAILOR
written by: a Chief Petty Officer

When the last line has been cast and you’re leaving her alone again for another six months
You wonder: Why did she marry a sailor?

When you’ve been gone only three months and you’re writing those dreadful words in a letter, “Honey, send more money”, knowing that she is already doing without
You wonder: Why did she marry a sailor?

When you know that clunker of a car you left her with needed three more days of work before you left and all you had time to do was change the oil
You wonder: Why did she marry a sailor?

When the last week you were in (that was supposed to be stand-down) every piece of gear in your division broke down
You wonder: Why did she marry a sailor?

When you stop and count and find in sixteen years you have a grand total of $275 in savings
You wonder: Why did she marry a sailor?

When its Christmas morning and you’re still sitting alone on the mess decks after having the mid-watch
You wonder: Why did she marry a sailor?

When its 0200 and you’re lying in your bunk looking up at the picture of your wife and new baby and thinking he’ll be walking by the time you get back
You wonder: Why did she marry a sailor?

When the last time you could mail a letter was two months ago
You wonder: Why did she marry a sailor?

Then one morning you finally hear the words “We’ve just past Pappa Hotel”, then you finally see her standing on the pier in her new dress with the little one in his new sailor suit and a tear forms in your eye
You know why she married a sailor!!

When you remember all of the other homecomings, he look of love in her eyes when she sees you, the feel of her touch again, the pride you feel when you see your child, the feeling of the honeymoon all over again
You know why she married a sailor!!

When you awake in the night and find that she’s nearly pushed you off the bed while seeking body heat
You know why she married a sailor!!

And when you are both old and gray and still acting like teen-agers because of all the time you spent apart
YOU KNOW WHY SHE MARRIED A SAILOR!!

SMW
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/03/08 08:22 PM
aw
Posted By: mishka422 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/03/08 09:31 PM
That is so sweet SMW!
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 01:41 AM
Near the end of my last thread, I recapped my weekend with H and everything about him being selected for Chief, in case anyone is wondering what happened.

SMW
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 03:34 AM
I just caught up with your weekend. TOOOO awesome!!!!


You go girl!
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 03:37 AM
SG--

Does it look as positive as it feels? Or, am I too close to be objective?

SMW
Posted By: smartcookie Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 03:52 AM
(((SMW))), it looks very positive, & next time KISS HIM, silly girl !
Hugs
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 04:08 AM
SC

I am thinking I am going to go for the kiss when I pick him up the end of this week. Of course, I will probably change my mind three or four times between now aand then .

I am soo nervous--I wanted things to work out, I prayed for it to happen, but I am so scared about the next step!

SMW
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 12:11 PM
Well, well. I'm not gonna muddle your head up. I'll say congrats to the H on the new job, good on you too!!

Looks like your doing really well and things are looking up.

3 Doors Down Tickets are looking better and better I bet!!

I say a prayer for you every night. I'll continue to do so.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 01:46 PM
Thanks for the congrats Mike! I cannot begin to sxpress how proud I am of my husband. This is a big step for him as far as achievement in his career and one that he has more than earned through his committment to the military and getting the job done, done right, and ahead of schedule. He is an amazing leader and his junior sailors have always looked up to him as a guiding light.

Actually, courtesy of H making Chief, we may not be able to go to 3 Doors Down, LOL! I have been told that that is the night of the Khaki Ball, a cocktail party we will have to attend. None of the dates are in stone yet and the Spouse Meet and Greet has been delayed due to the ship pulling back out. Hopefully we will know something by the end of the week.

No 2x4s for me, huh? Good, I am glad!! I know if you and Ian are not swinging I must be doing alright.

Please continue the prayers! I have stepped up mine. I went to a wonderful concert at my church last evening. Ricardo Sanchez performed and it was a wonderful, uplifting evening. I love this song by him:
Moving Forward

No emails from H yet, but I am not surprised. Between the couple days we had, OPSTEMPO on the ship, and Chief's initiation, I am sure his plate is VERY full right now. I am contemplating sending him something quick and encouraging, especially since he had seemed bothered by the lack of emails before he emailed me while they were out the last two weeks. Should I, or should I wait it out for him to send one to me again? I am open to opinions.

SMW


Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 01:49 PM
Hi SMW

I am a bit tardy in offering my congratulations to you and H for the wonderful advancement. You have been handling things incredibly well.
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 01:53 PM
If you are feeling the urge to send him an email, then do it. Just short and sweet as you said.
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 01:55 PM
Quote:
Actually, courtesy of H making Chief, we may not be able to go to 3 Doors Down, LOL! I have been told that that is the night of the Khaki Ball, a cocktail party we will have to attend. None of the dates are in stone yet and the Spouse Meet and Greet has been delayed due to the ship pulling back out. Hopefully we will know something by the end of the week.


hey sounds like a party either way..good on you which ever one happens.

Quote:
No 2x4s for me, huh? Good, I am glad!! I know if you and Ian are not swinging I must be doing alright.


due to a severe drought in our area there is a severe shortage of wood therefore I must conserve the 2x4's for the most deserving...in other words I'm saving them for Racefan...

I'll keep praying yopu keep working
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 02:03 PM
Thanks Ted, for the congratulatons and encouragement!

I am going to do some things around the house--with four kids it is never as clean as I would like. Funny enough, I used to not care about it, but when we moved in here, right after the bomb drooped, I became almost obsessive about keeping on top of the housework. I guess because it was something I had control over while my marrige was spinning out of control.

It was something that bothered my H--my lackadasical attitude about cleaning house. This is a major 180 for me and something that has been noticed. But, it was, again, something I did for me. I feel better about walking through a clean, picked-up house before I go to bed every night. Now, if I could just get the kids to clean their rooms, I would be a step up on the game. I have taken to making them keep their doors closed so I do not have to look at it.

I will check in with everyone later. I am wondering if you all had really good weekends since no one had very much to say over the weekend.

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 02:05 PM
Originally Posted By: M from Tennessee
Quote:
Actually, courtesy of H making Chief, we may not be able to go to 3 Doors Down, LOL! I have been told that that is the night of the Khaki Ball, a cocktail party we will have to attend. None of the dates are in stone yet and the Spouse Meet and Greet has been delayed due to the ship pulling back out. Hopefully we will know something by the end of the week.


hey sounds like a party either way..good on you which ever one happens.
Yep, thats us Navy people, we know all about good parties!

Quote:
No 2x4s for me, huh? Good, I am glad!! I know if you and Ian are not swinging I must be doing alright.


due to a severe drought in our area there is a severe shortage of wood therefore I must conserve the 2x4's for the most deserving...in other words I'm saving them for Racefan... [/quote] LOL I will warn Brian to duck the next time I see him!

Quote:
I'll keep praying yopu keep working



You got a deal!

SMW
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 02:44 PM
It was a very interesting w/e for moi. I do not know what it all means or how it will play out. God surely does. If I want to know, then I guess I had better just ask him.

In a nutshell, even though my darling was having a rather miserable w/e. She did mysteriously choose to reach out to me during a brief phone convo in an apparent effort to clarify the nature of her involvement w/ OM. She downplayed his significance in her life & even said that it had ended ?? My only response was to tell her that it was her life and her business, not something she needs to share with me. So, I did say that I appreciated her mentioning it but that it was her business.

It felt right to give her that response. I do not really know what she was looking for or what her motivation was for even having that talk with me. Then again, I am the epitome of a DAM.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 02:54 PM
You are not the epitome of a DAM, so get that thought out of your head!

I find it interesting that your darling felt it was necessary to clarify the nature of her relationship with the OM. HHHHMMM

I agree, you need to ask God how to proceed and for clarity on the situation. He is the fount of wisdom and will point you in the right direction.

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 08:43 PM
I have a question for the guys on this board--or maybe not--as you guys are not WAS. Actually, I suppose anyone with a spouse who was/is in an A may have some insight for me.

Prior to finding out about the OW, I had bought 14 Valentine's Day cards to send to my H, one each day--that way he would even get a few after the fact. three made it in the mail (the rst are in my nightstand). I also had sent a couple other cards post-bomb, once H had agreed to go to counseling when he got here. A couple of those cards are on his night stand in our room, in a pile of assorted other things. The three Valentine's Day cards and two others I sent were in an envelope of stuff from military counseling services that he had in the car, along with his service record, his orders, and some divorce info he picked up from base legal. The cards were visible through the window on the envelope--you could see my handwriting on the envelopes--so H would have to know they are in there. The counseling stuff, BTW, was on marriage counseling.

When I drove him to the pier, I noticed that the envelope and his service record were in a bag for him to carry on the ship. Curiosity finally got the better of me a little bit ago and I looked in the back of the car. All the divorce stuff is still here. Of course, now a part of me wants to throw it out!!

Should I put any credence into the fact that he took that envelope, especially in light of how the weekend went? Even if he did not intentionally grab the cards, I suppose there is a good chance he may re-read them, right? They are full of my accepting my part in our situation, hope for the future, etc.

SMW
Posted By: Kalni Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 09:19 PM
Hon,
I am no WAH but if you want my 2 cents here it is :you know he has them, now forget it. What could you possibly "build around" that? Sure there is a chance he took them with him on purpose, but what reading them again will "do to him" you will never know. Many little things matter IMO, but we never know how much each of these things weighted (spelling?).

Hon, you are doing so well and I am so happy to hear you excited and strong...
Love
K
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 09:42 PM
You are right K

It is good that he has them, as there is always the potential for him re-reading them and doing even more thinking about how wonderful I am and how much he is missing what we had together (much like what he told our friend last week).

My friends see the difference in me, my mom says I am livign a fantasy life that will fall apart when the rug gets pulled out from under me again. She is so kind. SIGH

Alright, off to feed the kids.

Back later!

SMW
Posted By: ann25 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 09:52 PM
SMW - i know that my H doesn't keep any of the cards i've ever given him, but i sent him one not that long ago telling him that i know things will get better yada yada yada... he kept it and i found it in his drawer when we moved recently. I asked him why he kept it and he said that there was no special reason, probably he just set it in his drawer cause he was busy... Then when i asked him if he would like me to just throw it out, he said no, just put it in the box. It's back in this desk drawer.

Kalni is exactly right that you have no idea what they mean to him and that you shouldn't build anything arround that, but i'd say if he took them, they mean something, especially after a good weekend...

ann
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 11:03 PM
Ann--

My husband has kept everything I have ever given him. We have a little trunk full of cards and letters that we have exchanged since we first started dating. I am not going to obsess about it, honest, but it did add to the warm, fuzzy feeling that is carrying over from the weekend.

SMW
Posted By: ann25 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 11:04 PM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
it did add to the warm, fuzzy feeling that is carrying over from the weekend.
awesome!! \:\)

ann
Posted By: *KS*Chick* Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/04/08 11:48 PM
when is he back home again?
Posted By: smith18 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 12:11 AM
SMW -

Congratulations on your H making CPO. As an ex-sailor myself, that is a huge change in pay and job responsibility. But even more important is the fact that your M now appears on the road to recovery. Well done!

Just remember... Red sky at night, sailor's delight. Red sky in morning, sailors warnin'g.

Here's to good sailing ahead,

Kerry
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 12:18 AM
Sometime between Thursday and Saturday. OPSEC does not let us find out until 48 hours ahead of time, and we do not get an exact time until 24 hours out.

I am going to send him a quick email tonight, letting him know about the F from church that will sign his Charge Book and just let him know we are thinking about him. He had also asked me to see if I could get him some extra coveralls from the base thrift store, so I have to let him know about that, as well.

I am trying to do a couple other small things around the house, just to see if he will notice them, too. One of D16's friends has offered to come cut the grass on Wednesday. I am going to take him up on it, just cause the mosquitos are so bad that I do not want to be out there.

Off to measure and cut some fabric for curtains. Back later!

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 12:23 AM
Originally Posted By: KerryK
SMW -

Congratulations on your H making CPO. As an ex-sailor myself, that is a huge change in pay and job responsibility. But even more important is the fact that your M now appears on the road to recovery. Well done!

Just remember... Red sky at night, sailor's delight. Red sky in morning, sailors warnin'g.

Here's to good sailing ahead,

Kerry


Thanks for the congrats Kerry. I have to say it again, I am so proud of him! We are looking at about $450 more a month and we are first increment, so it will kick in no later than October. That will be very nice with him going on cruise. Hopefully the skipper is fond of hitting the golden circle to ensure we stay tax free for most of it, too!

It does seem like we may be making some steps in the right direction as far as our M. I am cautiously optimistic about things and am still not putting myself out there too much. I know at some point, I am going to have to step on faith, but I do not think it is time yet.


I sense God's hand in all of this, and know that He will tell me the right thing to do at the right time. Until then, I will just keep praying and working on me.

SMW



Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 02:34 AM
SMW...

Here is my take on the cards now this is 'just me' other men could and can be different. I was not much for keeping cards that were given to me, but W would hang on to them and everybody elses, hers, the kids. Now when I would ask her to make my lunch to take to work she would always write a note on a napkin, from have a good day to last night was electric. I never kept a card, but I have EVERYONE of those napkins.

A man doesn't just do something for no good reason there is usually a purpose behind it, IMO the cards will keep him grounded while being away and to remind him that he has a AWESOME Navy wife waiting at home that supports him. Just my take on it...

Your path is straight right now stay grounded yourself and allow the word of God to keep guiding you...

HUGS

Brian
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 02:43 AM
Hey SMW, for what it is worth I have every card, every letter, every note, every gift..I can see every message STBX ever left me on the mirror in lipstick in our master bath in my mind..I'll take the cards with me when I leave. I'll read them later one at a time. Then I'll shred them and start my new life.. he knows the cards are there. I can't read his mind and tell you that he will read them..but he has them..that's all that matters right??
Posted By: goldeylox Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 03:43 AM
SMW, First, congratulations to your H on his accomplishment. You have every right to be proud of him, and it's not over the top to send a quick note (not too mushy) telling him how proud his family is of him.
I'm sorry your mom couldn't find anything nicer to say.
You may have already heard of the flylady website. If not, RUN, don't walk and check it out. If you have seen it, then is your sink shiny? lol I'm a flybaby for almost 4 years.
No matter where this is going, God will not forsake you. Trust in Him that He has a plan for you and it is good. Peace.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 05:29 PM
{{{{{Brian, Mike, Goldey}}}}}

Thanks ya'll!

Alright, so the testosterone twins see the cards being gone as a good thing--he has them. I can have little dreams about him lying in his rack at o'dark thirty, thinking about home and pulling them out to think about what he has left behind--literally and figuratively.

I went to bed early last night and did not send an email yet. After I feed the heathens and put the two small ones down for naps, I will send one then.

I am going to do some things in the house today, it is too hot to go outside. I am hoping it cools down a little, so I can do some yard work later.

Goldey--I have never heard of that website--I will go check it out later. However, I do have a shiny sink--as I HATE a cluttered kitchen!

Later taters!

SMW
Posted By: smartcookie Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 08:18 PM
((SMW)) hugs.
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 09:13 PM
Hi SMW

just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you and praying.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/05/08 09:25 PM
Hi SC!! Thanks for the drive by hugs!

Hi Ted! Thanks for what you said on sadincolorado's thread!

I am finally comfortable in saying that I have come far in how t odeal with my situation and my emotions. Hard to believe it has been 6 months since I found out, 4 months since H left. I was still spinning out of control when I started posting here in May. I know that the changes really occured becasue I was finally willing to submit myself to God's will and begin to allow him to change me into the person he wants me to be. I still ahve moments of doubt and confusion--look at me obsessing over cards last night for proof of that!--but I can pull myself back in so much faster now and get myself under control.

Back to cleaning and then I am going out to plant some flowers. It has cooled off a lot and I will not melt!

SMW
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:14 AM
you have earned those compliments SMW \:\)
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:08 AM
SMW...

First off {{{HUGS}}}

You have come far in in your time frame and have alot to be thankful for...

Healthy kids...

Husband that is thinking...

Your faith in Christ...

You are becoming a pillar of strength for yourself and your family, we will all have doubts as we travel this road of life with it's ups & downs and sometimes 'S' curved paths. The trick is never to forget where we have been and what it has taken to get where we are now. Don't look into the rearview mirror always aim for looking out the windshield for the things to come.

You are doing so well on your path and for what it means I am proud of you, your ability to recognize when you are spinning and then being able to grab ahold and bring it back to an even keel is something to hang onto not just in your M but in life.

Brian
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:12 PM
SMV-
you are doing great...just wanted to stop in and say hi!!!!
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:17 PM
Is there something I missed sometime ago Neilh? Why is it always SMV rather than SMW? Just curious. I guess there must be a reason. Those two letters aren't all that close on the keyboard.
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:20 PM
LOLO....oops. no. Have i done that everytime? SMW...perhaps its a dmv thing? LOL...sorry
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:22 PM
Neil--

Yep, for the most part, I just chalked it up to you being you. No biggie!

SMW
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:23 PM
OMgosh. i didn't even see it...LOL...how embarassing!
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:32 PM
now look what I have done. I have embarassed him ..lol. All along I just thought that I had missed something. Now when I see a post from you Neil, it is going to look wrong not seeing SMV. Too funny.
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:33 PM
don't change it on my acct. Like she said, she just thought it was you being you, which it was.

Good morning to you both, anyway.
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:42 PM
that's ok. i'll probably still do it. smw....feels weird to type it that way....seriously, i think its the dmv thing
Posted By: Coach Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:46 PM
I thought it was Sad Military Vixen!?

SMW, There was a Comedy C show on last night with Kevin James and he did a long bit about men and women and cards. It was hilarious and I kept thinking about you. You need to find it and watch it.
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:48 PM
i've seen that! that's hysterical...but so true.....i think us guys have a knack for picking out the right card LOL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qFGdUgaDgKQ

here it is on youtube
Posted By: The Wifey Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 12:48 PM
(((SMW)))

You are doing so great, honey. You did just the right things for your H when he got his promotion. I teared up at him saying you'd always been there for him.

Keep saying those prayers. I know God hears you and he is working miracles.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 01:26 PM
Woody--

I will youtube it and see if I can find it.

Hey, I like that HHHMMM Sad Military Vixen! Wonder if I could get a bumper sticker that says that???? Or hey we were looking for a new "S" for me--Sexy Military Vixen--maybe that one is pushing it! LOL

Nah, I like being a military wife to the world. I will save Vixen for the H!

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 01:34 PM
Originally Posted By: Neilh23
i've seen that! that's hysterical...but so true.....i think us guys have a knack for picking out the right card LOL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qFGdUgaDgKQ

here it is on youtube


OMG Neil!! thanks for finding that! It was sooo funny!


Now, do you guys want to hear a sweet story about my H--just so you know he has the capability of being an advanced DAM?

When we were first engaged, he was stationed in Iceland. He had been there about three or so months and made several friends and joined a bowling league. Well, the one night they had all gone bowling and H had made a comment at work that he would not be doing a lot of drinking, he only had a couple dollars left. On his way to the bowling alley, he stopped at the Mini Mart and spent his last few dollars on a card to send back to me. He told me he had been missing me and wanted to send me something besides another letter. He would write me almost every day while he was in Iceland.

See, this is one of the reasons why I know better than to believe everything he was spewing a few months back. The proof is in the trunk full of letters I have from him. God does not create a love like that and then just let it go away.

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 01:35 PM
Originally Posted By: The Wifey
(((SMW)))

You are doing so great, honey. You did just the right things for your H when he got his promotion. I teared up at him saying you'd always been there for him.

Keep saying those prayers. I know God hears you and he is working miracles.


Thank you Kelly Jo! I was already teary-eyed because I was so proud of him, having him say that was icing on the cake!

SMW
Posted By: Coach Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 01:36 PM
Feels great to laugh, doesn't it?
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 01:42 PM
Yeah it does Woody, especially since I have been fussing at D8 about her pigsty since 8am.

SMW
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:00 PM
I bet you thought I would let this slip by and not say anything..

Quote:
so the testosterone twins


Now, I have been trying to figure out if this is a good thing or an insult. I've consulted my Men R From Mars/ Women R From Venus pocket guide and can't really figure out what exactly SMV (lol) means by that..

Where's Brian at anyway?? he needs to come on here and defend himself..
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:12 PM
I ain't talkin to you guys today, you all yelled at me last night and hurt my itty bitty feewings...

Brian
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:23 PM
Originally Posted By: Racefan
I ain't talkin to you guys today, you all yelled at me last night and hurt my itty bitty feewings...

Brian


there you go showing tough + a little vulnerable...

chicks dig that!!

let me get something to catch SMW with..she will swoon when she reads that..
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:27 PM
Originally Posted By: M from Tennessee
I bet you thought I would let this slip by and not say anything..

Quote:
so the testosterone twins


Now, I have been trying to figure out if this is a good thing or an insult. I've consulted my Men R From Mars/ Women R From Venus pocket guide and can't really figure out what exactly SMV (lol) means by that..

Where's Brian at anyway?? he needs to come on here and defend himself..


I could not resist it, with all the Nascar talk, lumber waving, and male posturing going on on Brian's thread. I was getting ready to start making comments about how Dreamy Christian Bale is again.

SMW
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:28 PM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife

I was getting ready to start making comments about how Dreamy Christian Bale is again.

SMW


Barf. at least it's not on my thread
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:30 PM
Originally Posted By: M from Tennessee
Originally Posted By: Racefan
I ain't talkin to you guys today, you all yelled at me last night and hurt my itty bitty feewings...

Brian
Need a hug?? {{{{{Brian}}}}}

there you go showing tough + a little vulnerable...

chicks dig that!! Damn straight we do!

let me get something to catch SMW with..she will swoon when she reads that..


Hey, I love a sensitive guy--wait, actually that is a very true statement--as it describes my H perfectly!! You guys cannot win me over, my heart is for ever lost to H. We are "the Notebook" and "Somewhere in Time" all rolled into one.

SMW
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:39 PM
Quote:
You guys cannot win me over


just think of us as brothers.

I knew ole "Corn Fed Casanova" would say the right thing..
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:43 PM
I am glad you guys have added me to your clique Since G and his wife are all wink wink nudge nudge, I do not have any men to goof with!

Hey, I was jsut thinking of something. I must be a good person to goof with. I was talking to John210, and he and his wife are piecing. I goofed with Dr. Love, and he and his wife went to retro. I goofed with Gforce, and we all know what is going on there. Tomato and I started chatting and he and his darling are all wink wink nudge nudge, too--she just needs to center herself.

I must help you guys exude some level of confidence that is attracting your W's back.

SMW
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:44 PM
heck yes baby......keep it up!!!!!
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:48 PM
SMW...

I always wanted a sister that's cool...

Now Mike on the other hand he tells his sister goodnight every night when he rolls over on his side of the bed...

Brian
Posted By: Coach Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:49 PM
God, then please goof with me!
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 02:59 PM
Well, Jeff has the Rockettes and is Virtually Handsome, so I guess I get you guys, huh? Alright, works for me!

LOL

SMW
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:00 PM
Quote:
I must help you guys exude some level of confidence that is attracting your W's back.


exude my part for Brian. He's got a chance.

Mine is DOA, unless of course you could exude a miracle for her...and then I don't have a clue what I would need since I've "lost that loving feeling"...maybe a miracle myself. At the moment I can't even fathom, can't even entertain the thoughts.

I think I just threw up in my mouth!!
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:01 PM
Originally Posted By: Racefan
SMW...

I always wanted a sister that's cool...

Now Mike on the other hand he tells his sister goodnight every night when he rolls over on his side of the bed...

Brian


I have a sister, they are not all they are cracked up to be! I am sure my son is questioning the wisdom of having three older sisters, too! But, heck I could use a brother right now, especially one that actually supports my wanting to fix my marriage!

Well, Brian, it could be worse, Mike could be telling your sister good night when he rolls over. J/K MIke!!

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:03 PM
Originally Posted By: M from Tennessee


I think I just threw up in my mouth!!


LMAO Mike!! I almost hope your wife does change her mind, just to see her on here--as a WAS now a LBS. The 2x4s would fly then!

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:12 PM
I jsut had a real epiphany while typing over on Neil's thread.

I posted:
Quote:
I have to confess. Up until about 5 weeks ago, I would block my number and call the OW's cell---several times a day. Why??? I don't know, as I would not have said anything. But I was so wrapped up in her that I was a mess. It occured to me, though, one day, that she is someone to be pitied, not jealous of. She has so little self-esteem and self-worth that she is willing to settle for crumbs from my table. And it is crumbs--look at the time my H and I spend together--he has visitation at my house, for goodness sakes! If he did not want to be around me, he would not stay here, he would take the kids elsewhere.


OMG how true is that!?!? G made a comment about this awhile back about how much time H spends here and I did not pick up on it. Maybe I need to start opening up and giving H more time to spend here. He is especially going to need me now, while he is going through the Chief transition. I am thinking, when I pick him up later on this week, that I need to find a way to drop that into conversation. I am thinking, since he is going to be so tied up with that and his free time is going to be sporadic, at best, that I will tell him that he is welcome to come over whenever he has the opportunity.

What do you guys think?

SMW
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:20 PM
yep. i would offer it...in a nonchalant, but chalant way. like offer, but don't force it....leave it up to him...
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:26 PM
Quote:
LMAO Mike!! I almost hope your wife does change her mind, just to see her on here--as a WAS now a LBS. The 2x4s would fly then!


well if you see someone come on here as K from Tennessee then by all means..let the wood fly and swing damn hard. taht would be something, me go all WAS on her..and the worm turn for her as LBS..

would that be considered "Kharma"?
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:27 PM
Just talked to another woman whose husband has made chief. He is not out to sea and they live in the same house. She says if she has seen him awake six hours since Friday it would be a generous assessment! Yes, I definitely need to let him know that I am flexible about him seeing the kids!!

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:28 PM
Originally Posted By: M from Tennessee
Quote:
LMAO Mike!! I almost hope your wife does change her mind, just to see her on here--as a WAS now a LBS. The 2x4s would fly then!


well if you see someone come on here as K from Tennessee then by all means..let the wood fly and swing damn hard. taht would be something, me go all WAS on her..and the worm turn for her as LBS..

would that be considered "Kharma"?


I would have to say yes, it is! LOL

SMW
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:32 PM
Quote:
I am thinking, since he is going to be so tied up with that and his free time is going to be sporadic, at best, that I will tell him that he is welcome to come over whenever he has the opportunity.


hey, I say if it works then just do it. He will apprecaite that I think.
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 03:37 PM
SMW...

I don't see a problem with just throwing it out there in an easy manner, I'm sure with what her will be going through a stable place to feel comfortable in will keep him grounded...

Brian
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 05:01 PM
Thanks guys!

Brian--

that is what I am hoping for--he will consider home as a place of refuge where he can refresh, regroup, and recharge before heading back into the fray.

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 11:20 PM
EMAIL ALERT!!
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<Is doing the happy dance!

Just over 24 hours since I sent mine and I get a response addressed directly to me and only one little sentence to the kids.

Here is what I sent:

Quote:

H,

How goes it on the big grey boat? How soon after you got back on board did the fun begin? Have you chosen a sponsor or do they assign one to you?



Chief Washburn came up to me at church on Sunday and said to tell you that he would be honored to sign your charge book. I told him I would pass the message on to you the next time I emailed you.



The kids are doing good. I think S2 has a bit of a sinus infection. I am going to keep an eye on him over the next couple of days and see how he is doing. I am going up to the school to register D5 for kindergarten tomorrow. I cannot believe our Peanut is going to be starting school! I remember sitting in the New Mom tent with her, waiting for you to come off the boat and see her for the first time, as if it were only yesterday. D8 is D8, and that pretty much sums her up! D16 has tutoring today and then is off for the next week and a half while her tutor is out of town.



I called the thrift store yesterday, but they were already closed for the day. They are open again on Wednesday and Thursday, so I will get out there one of those two days to grab coveralls for you. Did you say that you need name tapes, too? I honestly cannot remember. I know you did say you had your crows. Is there anything that you need me to take care of for you? I have been reading the forums since you left. Some of the things women are posting that their husbands are having to do are interesting, to say the least! One woman had to go buy an 18 count box of eggs for her husband. We were joking about him being involved in egging the CO's house or something similar! LOL. Another said her husband has to get up at 3:30 in order to make PT in the morning. Apparently they live over half an hour away from the base. Told her she should try the Norfolk traffic, that the base only LOOKS close to everything!



Let me close this up and drop it in your inbox. Hope you are getting some sleep. I won't say enough, as I am positive that is not happening!! We will see you soon. We are praying for you, we miss you, and we love you! Stay safe!

SMW


Here is what I got back:

Quote:


SMW,

The big grey boat sucks right now! This sh^t is worse than boot camp but, I have to go through it. We never did this much working out in boot camp either. The fun started as soon as I came on the boat that day. Chief was standing at the entrance of the tunnel waiting on me. I can't think of any uniform items I'll need right now, thank you though. I wish I were one of the guys going through the process on shore. It has to be a lot easier being able to escape to the real world. We have sooo little time to ourselves during the day. I haven't been able to check my email in a couple of days. It's kind of like mail call during boot camp a little something to help you escape. Anyways, I'll talk to you guys later. Take care. Tell the chillens I miss them and can't wait to get back to them.

H


Now, I know this probably sounds stupid and kind of a chick thing to notice, but the font color on the email was not black. It is the blue he always used to use before when he would email me--prebomb.

So, I will email him back something nice and uplifting, maybe drop in about him beign able to come escape whenever he needs to, as he is obviously going to need to do that.

Friendly is definitely there and maybe a need to talk to someone who would understand???

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 11:23 PM
I wonder if he has to delete the word love out of his email because he types it "by accident" like I do?

SMW
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 11:26 PM
It looks like you are very happy right now. Excellent! I will have to read up to find out what exactly sparked your elation. I am happy for you .....SMV ..lol.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/06/08 11:53 PM
Originally Posted By: Tomato
It looks like you are very happy right now. Excellent! I will have to read up to find out what exactly sparked your elation. I am happy for you .....SMV ..lol.


LOL

You troublemaker!!

SMW
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:08 AM
It is what I am best at. Well it might be a tie between that and something else. Wink wink nudge nudge.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:30 AM
Originally Posted By: Tomato
It is what I am best at. Well it might be a tie between that and something else. Wink wink nudge nudge.


I will take your word on that! Save it for your darling!

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:44 AM
I am feeling a flirt coming on in my response to this email. There are so many little opening that I can utilize. Should I go for it? Type it and post it for approval?? UGH I have butterflies in my stomach, but in a good, anticipating way.

sg, ST, what do I do??????

SMW
Posted By: Virtually_Handsome Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:54 AM
Type it and post it! What else?

(((((SMW)))))
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:55 AM
why not flirt with him? will it hurt anything? I doubt it would be bad........
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 01:03 AM
You know, I am thinking you guys are closet voyeurs.

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 01:43 AM
Hey Sis...

Here's my take on it, the last 2 that you have sent have gone over well. You know H better than we do and you have a better feel for where you are at right now, so if it is just some subtle flirtin I don't see the harm. Heck he is on a boat with how many other guys? I wouldn't go 'over board' but just alittle something for him to sit and ponder hhhhmmmm???

The last few times W has initiated the flirting and it has gone well, after the 4th I just take it in stride and let it feed my PMA. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain...

Brian
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 01:44 AM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
You know, I am thinking you guys are closet voyeurs.

SMW


Hey Sis...

Is the a bad thing? ;\)

Brian
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 01:57 AM
Originally Posted By: Racefan
Hey Sis...

Here's my take on it, the last 2 that you have sent have gone over well. You know H better than we do and you have a better feel for where you are at right now, so if it is just some subtle flirtin I don't see the harm. Heck he is on a boat with how many other guys? I wouldn't go 'over board' but just alittle something for him to sit and ponder hhhhmmmm???

The last few times W has initiated the flirting and it has gone well, after the 4th I just take it in stride and let it feed my PMA. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain...

Brian


Well, the carriers now have women on board, too, but the ratio is definitely low! yes, the flirting is going to be very subtle--and I will definitely need it approved, as it will be too easy to go overboard (well, overboard for the current circumstances).

thanks for the affirmation! Oh, and where is your new thread?

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 01:58 AM
Originally Posted By: Racefan
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
You know, I am thinking you guys are closet voyeurs.

SMW


Hey Sis...

Is the a bad thing? ;\)

Brian


Nah, not necessarily!

Hey, this is cool, I now have a brother who is older than I am! Finally! I get to be a little sister!!!

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:26 AM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
Originally Posted By: Racefan
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
You know, I am thinking you guys are closet voyeurs.

SMW


Hey Sis...

Is the a bad thing? ;\)

Brian


Nah, not necessarily!

Hey, this is cool, I now have a brother who is older than I am! Finally! I get to be a little sister!!!

SMW


Hey Sis...

As i said the other day always wanted a sister, I had 2 older brothers. So I hoped you wouldn't take offense to it I kinda like it hehe!!

If you want to post it here then post away if you are comfortable with doing it. So far what you have been doing has brought positive results, like they say try different things then step back and watch...

Yes been trying to think of a new title to fit with my sitch at this point will get one up here shortly...

HUGS

Brian
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 03:35 AM
Here is my potential response.

Quote:

H—

I have to admit, I started laughing when you said the boat sucks right now! Which chief was waiting for you? Chief P? He did seem to be typing with an evil chuckle when he found out you were on "the list!" LOL

I know things are probably rough. But, you made it through boot camp and A school with flying colors, I am confident you can do the same with this. In six weeks, if you have not deployed, we will all be able to pop a bottle of champagne and celebrate you making it through this milestone, too.

I have heard the PT is a bitch, but hey, you are already in really good shape, anyway. Look at all the sit-ups and push-ups you were doing before this!! You will be knocking that stuff out of the park now! Certainly does not hurt the look of you, either. Are you running up on the flight deck?

Remember my mentioning the guy who had to buy an 18ct carton of eggs? His wife posted that last night they had to sit and blow the insides out of all of them. Another wife said her jumbo trash can has disappeared in the back of her husband’s truck, as well as the chains they secure their fence with. Apparently, everyone is doing tons of research on Naval history and traditions. If you need any help with that, let me know. You know how I love a good research project and I know the search capabilities are limited on the ship.

I guess living this 24/7 would wear on anyone's nerves. Only a few more days til the boat is back in. You will be able to come home to regroup, refresh, and recharge before heading back out into the fray whenever you need to. If you want us to come pick you up when the boat pulls in, just let me know what time to be pierside and we will be there.

The kids are doing good and miss you too. D8 is wondering if you are going to be able to go play Human CandyLand on Friday. I told her I would ask.

Well, let me go for now. We will see you soon. We love you and miss you and are keeping you in our prayers.

SMW



Is it too over the top? Did I go to far? I just want to go throw up from nerves right now

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 03:43 AM
Hey Sis...

;\)
Posted By: Virtually_Handsome Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 03:44 AM
I like it....
But wait for more opinions!

(((((SuperMW)))))
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 03:55 AM
It's good but shorten it and add the flirt...I'm on for a little bit more.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:01 AM
Alright sg, I will bite--how much more flirt? What would you suggest? What should I cut out?

And, guys, what is your testosterone opinion? Don't forget, either, I may not be the only one stroking his ego right now. What would get you guys thinking about possible sleeping alternatives to D8's bunkbed?

Hey, Bro--go round up my clique!

SMW
Posted By: Virtually_Handsome Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:09 AM
You might be able to cut out the part about PT, since it is kind of covered in the bootcamp part. Though mentioning that it makes him look good can't hurt! Maybe kick in a little of what it makes you feel?
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:14 AM
[quote=sadmilitarywife]Here is my potential response.

Quote:

H—

I have to admit, I started laughing when you said the boat sucks right now! Which chief was waiting for you? Chief P? He did seem to be typing with an evil chuckle when he found out you were on "the list!" LOL great

You made it through boot camp and A school with flying colors, I am confident you can do the same with this. Soon we will all be able to pop a bottle of champagne and celebrate you making it through this milestone, too.

I have heard the PT is a bitch, but hey, you are already in really good shape, anyway. Look at all the sit-ups and push-ups you were doing before this!! You will be knocking that stuff out of the park now! Certainly does not hurt the look of you, either. ;\) Are you running up on the flight deck? great! maybe add something about him giving you a replay

Remember my mentioning the guy who had to buy an 18ct carton of eggs? His wife posted that last night they had to sit and blow the insides out of all of them. Another wife said her jumbo trash can has disappeared in the back of her husband’s truck, as well as the chains they secure their fence with. Apparently, everyone is doing tons of research on Naval history and traditions. If you need any help with that, let me know. You know how I love a good research project and I know the search capabilities are limited on the ship. I'm not sure .... let's go more towards the flirt and try leaving this out...just testing those waters......this is more MOTHERLY....it's a good thing... but let's try without it ...unless you feel strongly

The kids are doing good and miss you too. D8 is wondering if you are going to be able to go play Human CandyLand on Friday. I told her I would ask. Very soon you will be able to come home to regroup, refresh, and recharge before heading back out into the fray whenever you need to. If you want us to come pick you up when the boat pulls in, just let me know what time to be pierside and we will be there. ok to be more domestic here....perhaps SOON, if he responds to a flirt or two ... you can send two emails, one from you, one from 'the family'...


Well, let me go for now. We will see you soon. We love you and miss you and are keeping you in our prayers. I love this, never lose it, not matter who tells you not to do it.

SMW




You are really savvy with words...punch in a little fun there.
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:17 AM
He writes you shorter, but I think he probably really enjoys your 'care' that you put into these emails. They're comforting, and they are not over the top. You really do a lovely job. And you ARE the perfect military wife.

The above is just my playing with it.

This IS a strength of yours, and you most likely can teach the class on it.

-----and with THAT thought....Keeping Love Alive lends itself to small groups really well. Maybe after you get through this YOU would want to lead small groups of KLA for base wives.
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:20 AM
I just saw what VH said....it's a good idea.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:25 AM
sg--

I am going to do a quick edit and repost. I wish I could begin to tell you what our emails and letters used to be like. Some of them would not be fit to print and will get purged from the trunk so that my kids do not read them !! I will hold on to them, just need to move them.

We even had a couple like that before we were serious. I am still to scared to put myself back out there like that. I know I will have to at some point, but I just cannot do it yet. I am not strong enough.

Be back in a few minutes.

SMW
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:28 AM
you're still up too, huh
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:33 AM
Originally Posted By: sgctxok
He writes you shorter, but I think he probably really enjoys your 'care' that you put into these emails. They're comforting, and they are not over the top. You really do a lovely job. And you ARE the perfect military wife.
Oh God, sg, you have no idea what that means to me! It brought tears to my eyes!

Quote:

This IS a strength of yours, and you most likely can teach the class on it.

-----and with THAT thought....Keeping Love Alive lends itself to small groups really well. Maybe after you get through this YOU would want to lead small groups of KLA for base wives.


I will get into more of this later, but I have been feeling a pull that perhaps that is what God has planned for me out of this. I am passionate about making marriages work, especially when there are children involved. No child deserves to have their world destroyed because the adults in their life is afraid of dealing with a difficult situation. I agree with Michelle--you do not have to live in an unhappy marriage because of the kids, you can make it happy again.

I have been pressed upon with the idea of a ministry at church that addresses this and allows couples to seek help before it gets to this point, as well as helping those standing for their marriage.

Certainly, working with other military spouses would be wonderful, even if I started small in the support group, first.

SMW
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:33 AM
Just as Jeff had mentioned, the part with "certainly doesn't hurt the look of you either" seems too stunted. It shows that you aren't saying what it is you want to say. Just say it. If you think he looks ripped and hot then it needs to be in there. Quit holding back. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:53 AM
You guys are so awesome!!

Okay, here is the rewrite:
Quote:

H—

I have to admit, I started laughing when you said the boat sucks right now! Which chief was waiting for you? Chief P? He did seem to be typing with an evil chuckle when he found out you were on “the list!” LOL

I am surprised that you are finding PT hard! You are in great shape and are going to look more amazing with the extra work! Hell, you can do push-ups for forever, it seems, and your arms and upper body show it, too! Reminds me of when you came home from the Enterprise cruise, when you had been lifting weights. Are you running up on the flight deck? That is something I would love to see—the flight deck of a carrier turned into a track. I know things are probably rough, but, you made it through boot camp and A school with flying colors, I am confident you can do the same with this. In six weeks, if you have not deployed, we will all be able to pop a bottle of champagne and celebrate you making it through this milestone, too. I cannot tell you enough how proud of you I am.

Some of the things I am hearing that selectees are being tasked with are hysterical! Your wry sense of humor is going to stand you in good stead. From what the wives are posting, the hours are still long on shore, too. You are right, though; at least there is some type of a break. I guess living this 24/7 would wear on anyone's nerves. Only a few more days until the boat is back in. You will be able to come home to regroup, refresh, and recharge before heading back out into the fray whenever you need to. If you want us to come pick you up when the boat pulls in, just let me know what time to be pier side and we will be there.

The kids are doing good and miss you too. D8 is wondering if you are going to be able to go play Human CandyLand on Friday. I told her I would ask.

Well, let me go for now. We will see you soon. We love you and miss you and are keeping you in our prayers.

SMW



I have not addressed either letter "Hon" on purpose. Should I do it? I will not use his pet name right now.

SMW



Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:53 AM
Originally Posted By: Racefan
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
You know, I am thinking you guys are closet voyeurs.

SMW


Hey Sis...

Is the a bad thing? ;\)

Brian


ROTFLMAO. Thx bro.
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:58 AM
those revisions are great. I doubt you need to tinker w/ it anymore. When I read it before, I was thinking it might be a little longish but that seems fine also. Good job. I doubt he will be sleeping in the kids bedroom much longer.
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 05:04 AM
Gotta get some zzzzzzzz. Good night. I'll be busy moving into my new apartment tomorrow. But I will catch up w/ you at some point. My prayers are with you.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 05:07 AM
Thanks for your input Ted! Get some rest and I will catch up with you tomorrow!

Good night my friend. Rest comfortably, knowing that God has everything in control.

SMW
Posted By: S.T. _I Made It! Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 10:06 AM
[quote=]my mom says I am livign a fantasy life that will fall apart when the rug gets pulled out from under me again. She is so kind. SIGH[/quote]

Is your mom not supportive of what your doing?? That is aweful to say. \:\( Just wait till your M is better than it ever has been and she'll be eating her words. \:\)
Posted By: S.T. _I Made It! Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 10:06 AM
oh you've got to be kidding!?!?

I've got 7 pages to catch up on??????? your killing me! ;\)
Posted By: S.T. _I Made It! Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 10:31 AM
sg,

I'm curious why you think it's okay for SMW to use the ILYs?

I was kind of thinking you must be a DB counselor since it said moderator not member. Wasn't sure what that stood for exactly.
Posted By: S.T. _I Made It! Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 10:34 AM
I also agree that the researching comment is motherly.

It's also a control issue, because I was like that too. Still am, a bit. He knows that your there and can help. He asked you to get his coveralls, so he is not afraid to ask for help if he wants it.

I haven't finished catching up, so there may be a revision on the email, but I didn't notice ANY flirting. What kind of flirting were you talking about????
Posted By: S.T. _I Made It! Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 10:55 AM
Originally Posted By: SMW
Up until about 5 weeks ago, I would block my number and call the OW's cell---several times a day. Why???


are you serious?????? Were you REALLY doing this?? OMGosh, No wonder your so much more confident and your attitude has changed in the last month.

on the email, have you sent it yet? I thought it was a little long also, only because of how short your H makes his. I'm really back and forth on how much "love" you put in the emails. Part of me says that you need to keep it short and less lovey-dovey, and the other part thinks, well maybe these will help him through the hard days he has. I'm still against using the ILY's unless it's for the kids. ONLY because what Michelle said about the WAS will feel guilty because they are not able to say it back. That really made a lot of sense to me when I read that. However, you are saying "we", so it's not as bad as "I". Don't ever say "I". Let him be the first to say it.

Hey, I am curious to see you talk about YOUR activities that have nothing to do with the kids. It has to be vague, but exciting. He's not asking questions about you still, and we want him to be curious about you. just MHO.

On the flirting. You REALLY need to just go for it. I would almost put something about...if D2 wasn't in your bed last time you were here, you might have gotten a middle of the night "booty call" (okay, I can't think of a good phrase, but that's all I could think of at 5:48 in the morning) And it could come during the talk of him looking good with all the pushups.

or even say something about...wow, the next time I see you, I'm gonna have to control myself!

what I think would be great, is the next time he comes back, you'll offer a back rub with him sitting on a stool in the middle of the bedroom floor, and start rubbing the shoulders, and the back, and just all over-in the "safe" areas that is- (while wearing some revealing clothing, I know you have some lol) and then whisper in his ear about how good he looks and how bad you've wanted to touch his strong looking body. well, that's kinda what I did anyways. ;\)

When I did that, my H wasn't very open to me yet [meaning, the A was still going on, and he still wanted the D but he was friendly and starting to enjoy more time together with me ..really it seems like it compares a little before the time of where your in your sitch now ] and he kept saying you really don't have to do that, but I said to him, "I really want to, you just turn me on so much I can't help it!" I really think that my strong initiation and flirting was really helpful. Plus the fact that it is a HUGE ego boost for guys, IMHO. AND it shows confidence in us, which is the biggest thing guys subconsciously/consciously look for in a girl. AND the most important factor in my success was, I didn't hold any expectations from him on what I was doing. So H didn't have to feel guilty because I was so carefree about it, and I never let him see me sad or lonely or rejected. If your going to flirt, you CANNOT let rejection get you. You have to continue your confidence, "well too bad for you then, cause I'm one hot mama!"
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 11:29 AM
Originally Posted By: Tomato
Just as Jeff had mentioned, the part with "certainly doesn't hurt the look of you either" seems too stunted. It shows that you aren't saying what it is you want to say. Just say it. If you think he looks ripped and hot then it needs to be in there. Quit holding back. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.



It's her language...it keeps in the style of the way she writes.
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 11:33 AM
Let us know the response you get \:\)
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 11:46 AM
Originally Posted By: S.T. _I Made It!
Originally Posted By: SMW
my mom says I am livign a fantasy life that will fall apart when the rug gets pulled out from under me again. She is so kind. SIGH


Is your mom not supportive of what your doing?? That is aweful to say. \:\( Just wait till your M is better than it ever has been and she'll be eating her words. \:\)


She just feels like I am not moving past things and that if my H goes through with a D it will be like the bomb all ove again. She does not see me getting stronger at all. She also does not realize how involved I have gotten at church or how much closer I have become to God. She will get it.

SMW
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 11:49 AM
good morning SMW

I have news to share.
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 11:49 AM
would you like to be the first to know.
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 11:50 AM
and no, I do not think that it involves me being a daddy soon
Posted By: Tomato Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 11:54 AM
I will put the aforementioned "news" up on my own thread rather than hijacking your's as I have been doing. It has been a little bit since I went to my own anyway.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:32 PM
Originally Posted By: S.T. _I Made It!
Originally Posted By: SMW
Up until about 5 weeks ago, I would block my number and call the OW's cell---several times a day. Why???


are you serious?????? Were you REALLY doing this?? OMGosh, No wonder your so much more confident and your attitude has changed in the last month.
Yes, it was not my finest moment.

Quote:
on the email, have you sent it yet? I thought it was a little long also, only because of how short your H makes his. I'm really back and forth on how much "love" you put in the emails. Part of me says that you need to keep it short and less lovey-dovey, and the other part thinks, well maybe these will help him through the hard days he has. I'm still against using the ILY's unless it's for the kids. ONLY because what Michelle said about the WAS will feel guilty because they are not able to say it back. That really made a lot of sense to me when I read that. However, you are saying "we", so it's not as bad as "I". Don't ever say "I". Let him be the first to say it.
He is going to have to say ILY first, I cannot do it right now. I would love to, don't get me wrong, but I am still too bruised from everything else. I HAVE to know he is back first.

Quote:
Hey, I am curious to see you talk about YOUR activities that have nothing to do with the kids. It has to be vague, but exciting. He's not asking questions about you still, and we want him to be curious about you. just MHO.

Unfortunately, other than stuff around the house and church, I do not have any activities without the kids. No one is offering to watch the kids for me so I can get out by myself and I do not like dumping them on D16 all the time. I am not going to lie and make things up, so it is what it is for now. Other than reading books and being on the computer my life is revolving around my house and kids. Sorority is on hiatus for the summer. I occasionally go visit friends--but the one I hung out with the most has been out of town for a month. She got back yesterday. It will be easier to do thigns now, too, cause we just throw all of our kids together and go.

Quote:
On the flirting. You REALLY need to just go for it. I would almost put something about...if D2 wasn't in your bed last time you were here, you might have gotten a middle of the night "booty call" (okay, I can't think of a good phrase, but that's all I could think of at 5:48 in the morning) And it could come during the talk of him looking good with all the pushups.

or even say something about...wow, the next time I see you, I'm gonna have to control myself!

I know I should do it ST, I just can't and I cannot explain why, either. I want to, but am afraid I cannot detach enough for that. I am terrified. I was so good at the flirt before we were serious and while we were dating. I guess because I knew that it would be received well--I KNEW he was interested in me in that way then. Now, the fear of rejection is overwhelming at times.

Quote:
what I think would be great, is the next time he comes back, you'll offer a back rub with him sitting on a stool in the middle of the bedroom floor, and start rubbing the shoulders, and the back, and just all over-in the "safe" areas that is- (while wearing some revealing clothing, I know you have some lol) and then whisper in his ear about how good he looks and how bad you've wanted to touch his strong looking body. well, that's kinda what I did anyways. ;\)
The worst is, I think like this every time I see him, just too scared to act on it.

Quote:
When I did that, my H wasn't very open to me yet [meaning, the A was still going on, and he still wanted the D but he was friendly and starting to enjoy more time together with me ..really it seems like it compares a little before the time of where your in your sitch now ] and he kept saying you really don't have to do that, but I said to him, "I really want to, you just turn me on so much I can't help it!" I really think that my strong initiation and flirting was really helpful. Plus the fact that it is a HUGE ego boost for guys, IMHO. AND it shows confidence in us, which is the biggest thing guys subconsciously/consciously look for in a girl. AND the most important factor in my success was, I didn't hold any expectations from him on what I was doing. So H didn't have to feel guilty because I was so carefree about it, and I never let him see me sad or lonely or rejected. If your going to flirt, you CANNOT let rejection get you. You have to continue your confidence, "well too bad for you then, cause I'm one hot mama!"
Alright, I get it. I have to find the rest of my self-confidence. Can I buy that at the grocery store? what aisle? I need to get it fast, too, since the ship will be back on Friday.

SMW
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:32 PM
Originally Posted By: S.T. _I Made It!
sg,

I'm curious why you think it's okay for SMW to use the ILYs?




She's not in the last resort technique....he comes to her for comfort, she uses 'WE'....and he's coming back for more....he's not just in it for the kids.


Quote:
I was kind of thinking you must be a DB counselor since it said moderator not member. Wasn't sure what that stood for exactly.



I'm the sheriff. \:\)

I'm a seasoned DBer and I have a heart for it. I'm solution oriented. I'm DB ONLY. Michele and Virginia like what I do.

But....I am NOT a DB Coach. And THAT's AWESOME. Not because I wouldn't like it, I would. But look at what they ALL have in common.

Somewhere around 1000 folks a year apply to be DB Coaches. We only have 8. Check them out.

Specific Education.
Long term marriages.
DB training.
And then they're tested.

Our Coaches ARE tops.





So---solution detect using the DB tools you're given, and
when you're taking advice:

Take it from your COACH first.
Then from SUCCESSES (that's where I fit...take it from your Coach first).
Then from others ... noting what has been successful for them, and pay attention to what isn't successful for them either.


One man's common sense is another man's downfall.--V. Peeples.


Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:34 PM
Originally Posted By: Tomato
I will put the aforementioned "news" up on my own thread rather than hijacking your's as I have been doing. It has been a little bit since I went to my own anyway.


OH you big tease!!!!!


I will be right over!!

SMW
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:42 PM
you're lacking in self confidence? SMV.....wha?????

you are in such good shape here...just do some small flirting....just do it. you'll be fine...he's receptive..look at all the positive interactions you are having with him....keep it up......

stop doubting yourself, girl!
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:43 PM
Quote:

She's not in the last resort technique....he comes to her for comfort, she uses 'WE'....and he's coming back for more....he's not just in it for the kids.
Do you really think so, sg??? I am so hopeful, but am afraid I will fall into expectations.

SMW
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:50 PM
Hey SMW..

why not just let yourself go and see what happens??

you're letting your fear of failure overcome you.

self doubt sucks big time.

This is about you ultimately, right?? not about him..

Stop overthinking..

let yourself go girl.
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 12:52 PM
yeah....i agree with Mike.....just let yourself go...stop worrying and start doing!!! don't let yourself get caught in a self fulfilling prophecy.....
Posted By: gForce Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 01:41 PM
Yea, from another guy -- He is sending you all sorts of positive messages. Us guys are pretty dense and pretty insecure. If it were me, I would be waiting for some positive feedback. Give him some! And not veiled or indirect -- be very clear about your intentions.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 01:42 PM
I get it guys, I get it! wow, all of you are ganging up on me!

Alright, then, what do the guys feel like I should be putting in there? It is not sent yet and I have time to re-write it. What would you want to get from someone you were sorta unsure about being interested in?

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 01:46 PM
Hey Sis...

Gotta agree with the concensus on this. Ask yourself that very question what would you want???

Brian
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 01:59 PM
Damn Bro--should I be talking with you about this?!?!?!? LOL

Oh, I KNOW what I want. I want the whole enchilada--ohhh bad choice of words, oh well!

I want to cuddle up on the sofa and watch a movie. I want to go for a walk on the beach at sunset. I want to go on a picnic, just the two of us, or with the family.

I would love to go ride bikes or go for a long walk together, then come home and take a shower together--that always had GREAT results.

I would love to give him a back rub--I know his back and shoulders have got to be acheing from the extra PT.

I know I cannot expect to have it all back right away and I am not sure how I would handle getting to wink wink nudge nudge, either. I am afraid I will cry through the whole thing, even though it is what I want.

Alright, how about I re-write the email and act as if it is back in 2003, before we were engaged, when we were still feeling each other out, and he was away at A school? I think I can handle it. I suppose the worst he could say is thanks, but no thanks, right?
Posted By: S.T. _I Made It! Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:08 PM
Originally Posted By: SMW
The worst is, I think like this every time I see him, just too scared to act on it.


GIRL! you got to get over this fear!!! If your feeling this, then you should let a little out! You can just try it once and see what happens, and if your rejected, you know it's not going to be a harsh rejection, I don't see your H that way at all, and you could choose a time where either he's about to leave, or something, that way if he does reject, then he'll be leaving and you can pretend to be okay until he leaves and then you can pout. ;\) But I really really feel he will not reject. He may have reservations, but I know that he will get turned on too by you, and he may even be relieved with you initiating. and your daughter was right about him wanting to get you to offer him to your bed. IMHO.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:12 PM
newest revision:

Quote:


H

I have to admit, I started laughing when you said the boat sucks right now! Which chief was waiting for you? Chief P? He did seem to be typing with an evil chuckle when he found out you were on "the list!" LOL

I am surprised that you are finding PT hard! You are in great shape and are going to look more amazing with the extra work! Hell, you can do push-ups for forever, it seems, and your arms and upper body show it, too! Reminds me of when you came home from the Enterprise cruise, when you had been lifting weights. Are you running up on the flight deck? That is something I would love to see—the flight deck of a carrier turned into a track. Doesn't it get hot up there with the sun beating down on the metal? You must get really sweaty and need a shower after that, huh? Shame I cannot scrub your back for you. After all this extra work, I bet you could use a good massage. I'll be more than happy to oblige when you get home.

I guess living this 24/7 would wear on anyone's nerves. I know things are probably rough, but, you made it through boot camp and A school with flying colors, I am confident you can do the same with this. Only a few more days until the boat is back in. You will be able to come home and regroup, refresh, and recharge before heading back out into the fray. In six weeks, if you have not deployed, we will all be able to pop a bottle of champagne and celebrate you making it through this milestone, too. I cannot tell you enough how proud of you I am.

The kids are doing good and miss you too. We will see you soon. Just let me know what time to be pier side and we will be there.
We love you and miss you and are keeping you in our prayers.

SMW


Is this what you guys are looking for????? Now my stomach is really a mess of butterflies!

SMW




Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:21 PM
good gravy..if you want this..

Quote:
I want the whole enchilada--ohhh bad choice of words, oh well!


then ask for it. You know we can't read your mind..

Quote:
I want to cuddle up on the sofa and watch a movie. I want to go for a walk on the beach at sunset. I want to go on a picnic, just the two of us, or with the family.


all this is great..just don't do it when he is in his man cave. You've seen him in it, you know when he is in it. He does not want this when he is in it..when he's not in it then he is receptive to all this.

Quote:
then come home and take a shower together


you actually think he would not go for this?? you've got to be kidding me right?? He would break his neck getting in the shower.

Quote:
I would love to give him a back rub--I know his back and shoulders have got to be acheing from the extra PT.


well start rubbing..and you might get this

Quote:
take a shower together


Quote:
I am not sure how I would handle getting to wink wink nudge nudge, either. I am afraid I will cry through the whole thing, even though it is what I want.


and whatever you do..for god's sake do not cry..we think that means one of two things..
1. it's good bye sex
2. we messed up and did something wrong.

don't cry, good lord..don't laugh either

Quote:
I suppose the worst he could say is thanks, but no thanks, right?


yes it is..

another thing..straight up. I know you're excited. I know your hopes are high. Be realistic.

it's still baby steps..
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:25 PM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
newest revision:

Quote:


H

I have to admit, I started laughing when you said the boat sucks right now! Which chief was waiting for you? Chief P? He did seem to be typing with an evil chuckle when he found out you were on "the list!" LOL

I am surprised that you are finding PT hard! You are in great shape and are going to look more amazing with the extra work! Hell, you can do push-ups for forever, it seems, and your arms and upper body show it, too! Reminds me of when you came home from the Enterprise cruise, when you had been lifting weights. Are you running up on the flight deck? That is something I would love to see—the flight deck of a carrier turned into a track. Doesn't it get hot up there with the sun beating down on the metal? You must get really sweaty and need a shower after that, huh? Shame I cannot scrub your back for you. After all this extra work, I bet you could use a good massage. I'll be more than happy to oblige when you get home.
I guess living this 24/7 would wear on anyone's nerves. I know things are probably rough, but, you made it through boot camp and A school with flying colors, I am confident you can do the same with this. Only a few more days until the boat is back in. You will be able to come home and regroup, refresh, and recharge before heading back out into the fray. In six weeks, if you have not deployed, we will all be able to pop a bottle of champagne and celebrate you making it through this milestone, too. I cannot tell you enough how proud of you I am.

The kids are doing good and miss you too. We will see you soon. Just let me know what time to be pier side and we will be there.
We love you and miss you and are keeping you in our prayers.

SMW


Is this what you guys are looking for????? Now my stomach is really a mess of butterflies!

SMW






I think you should drop what's in red. He knows this by what you said in the previous sentence. Believe me you set the table and invited him to dinner with the first few sentences..

He will pull up a chair...I know we are all DAMS but good gosh you gave him a map..

Dinners ready, come and get it!!!
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:28 PM
Mike---

have I told you lately I love you???? if it were not for my husband----LOL Oh, but my big brother would DEFINITELY not approve!!

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:29 PM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
newest revision:

Quote:


H

I have to admit, I started laughing when you said the boat sucks right now! Which chief was waiting for you? Chief P? He did seem to be typing with an evil chuckle when he found out you were on "the list!" LOL

I am surprised that you are finding PT hard! You are in great shape and are going to look more amazing with the extra work! Hell, you can do push-ups for forever, it seems, and your arms and upper body show it, too! Reminds me of when you came home from the Enterprise cruise, when you had been lifting weights. Are you running up on the flight deck? That is something I would love to see—the flight deck of a carrier turned into a track. Doesn't it get hot up there with the sun beating down on the metal? You must get really sweaty and need a shower after that, huh? Shame I cannot scrub your back for you. After all this extra work, I bet you could use a good massage. I'll be more than happy to oblige when you get home.

I guess living this 24/7 would wear on anyone's nerves. I know things are probably rough, but, you made it through boot camp and A school with flying colors, I am confident you can do the same with this. Only a few more days until the boat is back in. You will be able to come home and regroup, refresh, and recharge before heading back out into the fray. In six weeks, if you have not deployed, we will all be able to pop a bottle of champagne and celebrate you making it through this milestone, too. I cannot tell you enough how proud of you I am.

The kids are doing good and miss you too. We will see you soon. Just let me know what time to be pier side and we will be there.
We love you and miss you and are keeping you in our prayers.

SMW


Is this what you guys are looking for????? Now my stomach is really a mess of butterflies!

SMW






Hey Sis...

This is much better, you put alittle more of yourself out there give him a road map, we DAM's are abit slow we need direction. Like Mike said baby steps, get him thinking about the possibilities that he has with you. Yes exactly back to 2003, when it was new and you were feeling each other out, as it has been mentioned before what's the worse that can happen he says no.

The only way we can learn is by doing...

You are okay lose you fears...

Brian
Posted By: gForce Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:34 PM
Better, definitely.

Stop sweating the details. Exact wording, and nuanced semantics -- it is all lost on the male species. Send it already!
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:35 PM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
Mike---

have I told you lately I love you???? if it were not for my husband----LOL Oh, but my big brother would DEFINITELY not approve!!

SMW



get a grip on your fears babe..I don't want to have drive all the way up I81 to 2x4 you..good gosh..

he can't be that dumb...you send that to him..and he may just swim his arse back early...

if he don't show up then you may have testosterone twins + 20 other guys beating your door down.. ;\)

good gosh..

you notice how the sharks come in when the water is chummed?? \:D \:D \:D

you talkin about old Corn Fed!! he don't bother me
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:43 PM
I'll use your own words against you now.

Quote:
You know what you need to do, don't be afraid to do it. (Why do I not take my own advice??)


and don't go ing on other people's threads.

Quote:
Mike and Brian are making me blush

\:D

Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 02:47 PM
Originally Posted By: M from Tennessee
I'll use your own words against you now.

Quote:
You know what you need to do, don't be afraid to do it. (Why do I not take my own advice??)


and don't go ing on other people's threads.

Quote:
Mike and Brian are making me blush

\:D



I wasn't whining on other threads. It just hit me between the eyes when I typed it and reread it!

Alright, where the heck are sg and ST???

SMW
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 03:10 PM
at work


He she doesn't wine...i mean whine.


checking in...no need to second guess yourself. let 'er rip!

Keep it fun, keep it simple. Keep it YOU.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 03:47 PM
It is sent and I cannot get it back.

Here's hoping!

I need to go get some stuff done around the house and go pick D5 up from preschool. I will come play with you guys again later.

SMW
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:00 PM
you won't need to \:\)

how much free time do you have?
Posted By: The Wifey Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 04:39 PM
SMW

Go for it, honey. He is receptive but he is scared you will reject him. You want the ILY first? I would bet dollars to donuts that you'll hear it soon enough if you initiate with him. Just pull up those big girl panties and do it already!
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 05:57 PM
counter thought---

more flirting first. and work the body language when you see him in person.
Posted By: Sara Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 08:03 PM
SMW,

You will need to change your name. I suggest SuperMilitaryWife.
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 09:31 PM
oh yeah!
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 10:21 PM
Originally Posted By: sgctxok
you won't need to \:\)

how much free time do you have?


Free time?? Before he gets here, or after?

Just found out that liberty will be around 1:30-2 tomorrow afternoon. I have not gotten a return email yet. If I get one, I do not expect to see it much before 7-8pm at the earliest.

Once he is in, it will depend on his work schedule and what he has to do as part of transition.

SMW
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 10:28 PM
Just in general.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/07/08 10:28 PM
I wish I had all of ya'll's optimism! I am still so nervous but at this point, I cannot change anything so I have to go with the flow.

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 01:32 AM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
I wish I had all of ya'll's optimism! I am still so nervous but at this point, I cannot change anything so I have to go with the flow.

SMW


Hey Lil' Sis...

Breath. You have done nothing but shown H the same thing you did in the email before, just that he has a safe haven to come home to, you just added alittle zest a little hint of I'm okay puttin myself out there for you, if you want it great if not I'm okay with that to, no harm no foul. You're okay have faith in yourself...

Bro...
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 01:41 AM
Thanks, bro!

My house is clean, laundry is almost done, I am listening to KLA again, I have an appointment for a pedicure in the morning, and am thinking about maybe trying to go to sleep early tonight.

I will make sure I do my hair and make-up before I go to teh pier. I think I need to NOT wear the T-shirt that says I Love My Sailor, though.

Did you start a new thread yet? Oh, and did you see Mike's insult this morning? I told him my brother would not approve of him and he said he was not afraid of you! LOL

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 01:54 AM
Sis...

Thinks sound just perfect at home, I agree you need to get some rest so that you are on top of goals.

IMO wear something that H wouldn't expect keep it simple maybe but abit of 'hi how ya doing sailor' hehe!

Yes started a new one today. Oh that inbred hick thinks he is all that 'fabulous' thing, ya gotta understand him, he has no common sense what do you expect from somebody that likes the Crimson Tide haha LOL....

You gonna be fine trust yourself, be the woman that you have become...

Bro
Posted By: goldeylox Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 02:08 AM
Vixen, now, I've never dated a sailor, but I heard there was a welcome home protocol about what you (don't) wear to the pier. ;\) Hope you have a fantastic reunion. You sound so happy.(((SMW))) Peace.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 02:09 AM
No email yet, maybe in the morning. I am not going to speculate on why it has not been answered. In all likelihood, he has not even seen it yet, with the way his schedule is right now.

No expectations and exude self-confidence. I got it. Just wish I could have found some of that at the grocery store.

Funny you mentioning the "how ya doin' sailor." Whenever I pick H up from the pier, I always pull up and say, "Hey sailor, need a ride?"

I just hung a couple pictures around my desk. One is the Poem I started my thread with. The other is a window ad from a hotel in Norfolk from the 40s. It says:

Street Girls Bringing Sailors Into Hotel Must Pay For Room In Advance.



I fell in love wih it at a little antique store in Smithfield and H bought it for me years ago. My whole downstairs is decorated nautically---fish nets, lighthouses, ships, Navy Recruiting posters, sea scapes, etc. I always have one room decorated like this in every house--and it is usually where my computer is, as it is always my favorite room.

I am giving myself til 11 and then I am going to bed.

SMW

Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 02:14 AM
Originally Posted By: goldeylox
Vixen, now, I've never dated a sailor, but I heard there was a welcome home protocol about what you (don't) wear to the pier. ;\) Hope you have a fantastic reunion. You sound so happy.(((SMW))) Peace.


Goldey--

Vixen! LOL
Happy yes, coupled with a nervous wreck. This is just a regular return from a short hop, not the full deployment. H will be in port for the next month an a half, then will be going on a full deployment--gome at least 6 months.

I am sitting here trying not to obsess over my email. I need to go to bed for that reason alone! I think I will agfter I et the last load of laundry in the washer.

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 02:42 AM
Now Sis...

You gotta breath girl!! You are gonna be fine.

Bro
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 10:46 AM
SMV-
Racefan is right...just relax....don't worry about it. No Expectations, remember!

hope you had a good nite's sleep...i'll tell you what, i've been having some weird dreams.....seriously...LOL
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 12:04 PM
Good Morning ya'll!

I see my fan club is already drifting in this morning.

Neil you are right--no expectations and act as if. I have decided--actually it was what kept me up most of the night--that I am going to act as if H is returning from a regular deployment and none of the crap has happened. I can do this, becuas ethe prize is so worth it.

When I did finally go to sleep, I slept well and had no problem getting up this morning. I am going to go make my bed in a couple minutes, make some breakfast, and and then start pulling myself together. I am going to be very relaxed about things and not get myself rushed or frazzled.

Gott a go see what ya'll were up to after I went to bed last night.

SMW
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 12:27 PM
weird dreams.....last nite i was harry potter, with a sexual undertone. not good. hermoine....LOL...
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 12:39 PM
wear the red one

or the black one

you know...the, um....one that flatters the girls \:D
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 12:55 PM
Originally Posted By: sgctxok
wear the red one

or the black one

you know...the, um....one that flatters the girls \:D


sg--

I have lots of tops that flatter the girls! LOL The problem is the temperature, but I can "glisten" a bit today.

Going for a pedicure later on--D16 and her best friend told me to do it and htey would watch all the kids!!

SMW
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 12:56 PM
Originally Posted By: Neilh23
weird dreams.....last nite i was harry potter, with a sexual undertone. not good. hermoine....LOL...


LOL! I am not going there! Must be like my Batman dreams--man I love that Christian Bale!

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 01:11 PM
Hey Sis...

That sure is nice of D16 to do that for you, you sound in good spirits this morning, grab the reins abit and pull yourself in so you can get to an even keel, this is going to be a GREAT day for you and your family. I have all the faith in the world for you will do just fine...

Brian
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 01:35 PM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
Originally Posted By: sgctxok
wear the red one

or the black one

you know...the, um....one that flatters the girls \:D


sg--

I have lots of tops that flatter the girls! LOL The problem is the temperature, but I can "glisten" a bit today.

Going for a pedicure later on--D16 and her best friend told me to do it and htey would watch all the kids!!

SMW





you bring tears to my eyes....i'm so proud of you!!!


please post your polish color
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 01:36 PM
but who's your BEST BATMAN?
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 01:42 PM
SMW..Good luck today. I won't be able to follow much. Drama all around me at the moment.
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 02:18 PM
Well, Houston, we have a problem.

I have not heard back from H at all. The boat is due to moor around 12:30, with liberty to commence around 1:30-2. Do I just show up at the pier and hope he comes off the boat or do I wait for him to call and ask me to come get him? I do not want the kids to be disappointed if we are sitting there and he does not come off.

I guess this is the acting as if test. I think I will head to the pier to be there for 1 at the McDonalds and feed the kids lunch there. I will call and leave a message in H's cell phone to let him know where we are waiting.

Mike, I will head over to your thread and read up. I keep forgetting you jumped forums. Do not let her Drama get to you, you are way beyond her petty crap.

sg--If I could get my husband in the Batmobile---yummmy! HHMMM may be I need to go see what they have for Batman boxer shorts at the store! LOL

I am flipping between a frosty red and hot bubblegum pink. H always liked red, so I will probably fall over to that one.

SMW
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 02:43 PM
Hey Sis...

I wouldn't start frettin yet. As you have said all along he is pretty busy & under stress no doubt. I like the callin his cell and leaving a message. Hey the kids gotta eat so if you just happen to be in the area why not help out a sailor in need...

I opt for the red one

It's gonna be okay have faith...

Bro
Posted By: Neilh23 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 02:47 PM
yeah, definitly the red one. waht are we talking about?

don't worry so much.

it is going to be ok....ya gotta have faith...
Posted By: sgctxok Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 03:03 PM
Originally Posted By: sadmilitarywife
Well, Houston, we have a problem.

I have not heard back from H at all. The boat is due to moor around 12:30, with liberty to commence around 1:30-2. Do I just show up at the pier and hope he comes off the boat or do I wait for him to call and ask me to come get him? I do not want the kids to be disappointed if we are sitting there and he does not come off.

I guess this is the acting as if test. I think I will head to the pier to be there for 1 at the McDonalds and feed the kids lunch there. I will call and leave a message in H's cell phone to let him know where we are waiting.

Mike, I will head over to your thread and read up. I keep forgetting you jumped forums. Do not let her Drama get to you, you are way beyond her petty crap.

sg--If I could get my husband in the Batmobile---yummmy! HHMMM may be I need to go see what they have for Batman boxer shorts at the store! LOL

I am flipping between a frosty red and hot bubblegum pink. H always liked red, so I will probably fall over to that one.

SMW





gooooooooood plan!
Posted By: StrgMarvelousWmn Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/08/08 11:03 PM
My husband is exhausted and if he got the email he did not mention it. He finally got off the boat at 3:45 and by 4:30 he was back out the door to go to a Chief's house to do menial labor for a donation to the Chief's fund.

He was waving as he came out the gate and I got a small hug. He was happy to see us though. He talked to me all the way home and I do not know what to think right now about our R as H and W, but we are definitely friends.

While he called to get directions to the Chief's house, made him a couple sandwiches--he thanked me over and over.

Bad DB or not, I am washing his clothes while he is gone to Chief's house. I guess I am just being his wife right now, cause he does need me and I want to make sure he knows he can lean on me if he needs to.

He wanted to know if his sponsor or the CMC had called me yet, so they know he is married and obviously he has not told them he is separated.

Initiation is tearing him down. They made him shave his moustache, just because they can. They get in their face and yell at them all the time. He says it is way worse than boot camp ever was. He also said that it makes you start questioning yourself at 3am--why they would willing go through this. They do not have to do it to advance, but there is no respect if they do not. I hope he is questioning alot of things at 3am.

I need to feed the kids. I am unsure what to do next as far as H is concerned.

SMW
Posted By: ernest88 Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/09/08 01:49 AM
Hey girl..do not fret. Sounds like he was put through the ringer. I see lots of positives..Be real patient. He's tired, he's been through a lot and he may need to be in his cave for a bit..

Hang in there.
Posted By: Racefan Re: Why Did She Marry a Sailor? - 08/09/08 02:11 AM
Sis...

Gotta agree with the woodman on this, from what you have described it's basically like going back through bootcamp, anybody would be dead dog tired after that in a strained M or a good M. You are okay, don't let it get you down regroup and come out smiling and happy.

Bro
© DivorceBusting.com