Wow. Guess I haven't been on my thread as it's been locked for over a month.
I'll post more later, but just needed to get a new one started.
Still have more to learn about spending more time with H as opposed to the computer.
We are still doing good though, although I did have my occasional, "ug, we have nothing to say to each other" feelings. He was home for 3 days due to a undeserved suspension, and it was not very exciting during those 3 days. Well, 1 night was good, but that was the night I was all over him. Could just be a womancycle thing though, as I've been a little down over the weekend.
"I've been cheating on you."
Five chilling words. No wife (or husband) ever wants to hear them. But after the truth comes out, what next?
Bitterness? Revenge? Or forgiveness and freedom?
Everyone has anger and resentment issues, large and small - maybe your issues are with a spouse, a parent, or an adult child.
But you can be set free, once and for all - by practicing forgiveness.
FamilyLife™ wants to help you get there - through the remarkable CD Choosing Forgiveness, featuring the ministry of the outstanding Christian author, teacher, and leader Nancy Leigh DeMoss. It's our gift to you in appreciation for your online donation of support today.
In this extraordinary audio series, based on our FamilyLife Today™ radio interview, Nancy will help you discover:
* How to release the offender from our courtroom to God's custody.
* How to recognize our own sinful nature and the undeserved gift of God's grace and mercy.
* How to become debt forgivers and hostage releasers.
* How to begin the process of healing from past hurts.
You'll also hear amazing true stories of seemingly impossible life-situations - and how desperate people actually achieved the miracle of forgiveness.
For example, take a couple we'll call Larry and Gwen. Married 40 years ... their grown son served in full-time ministry - but Larry was passed over for a promotion that he had hoped for, and let his bitterness simmer and deepen.
Ultimately, he got involved in an adulterous relationship with a younger woman - destroyed his marriage - and ended up actually marrying the younger woman.
How did Gwen survive? She learned to practice forgiveness. Years later, on her hospital deathbed, she taught her adult children a powerful lesson about God's grace and the power of forgiveness.
You'll hear this story, and many others, firsthand on Choosing Forgiveness when you give an online donation. You'll also experience some very powerful, practical teaching - the result of years of Nancy Leigh DeMoss' hands-on ministry to thousands of individuals and families.
Choosing Forgiveness is real - it's practical. The truth is forgiveness is hard. We know it's much easier to be a debt collector than a debt forgiver, but forgiveness is the key to opening a door of freedom in your life.
Are you, or someone you love, in a prison of your own making, simply because there is someone you can't forgive?
We want to help. Today, for your donation to FamilyLife, we will send you the tremendous CD, Choosing Forgiveness.
Your generosity will help FamilyLife continue to reach out to a broken, hurting world with the message of grace, mercy, forgiveness, and healing through our FamilyLife Today and Real FamilyLife® radio programs, Weekend to Remember® marriage conferences, FamilyLife.com website, and other encouraging, family-building resources.
Enter this code when you give your online donation to receive the
Choosing Forgiveness CD: Key Code: FORGIVE Yours for godly homes,
FamilyLife Team
the above is an email I received from Family Life. I believe they will take any dollar amount as a donation for the CD.
We will be leaving tomorrow for Wichita to visit family for a week. Hopefully I'll still have a chance to check everyone here.
Things are still going good. WEll, except for the boring part. I really wonder if our personalities are so different that we can't really have fun. I want to have a husband that brings out the best in me, but I don't really have that. I guess part of that is on me, because I control myself, and he doesn't control me. I wish I could get my silly/weird/fun old teenager back. I use to be really goofy and silly and I had so much fun back then. I feel kinda old now. But that's what a M and kids do...it puts responsibilities on you and now I have to learn how to balance myself between being fun and responsible. I think I've lost that fun self for so long that it's work trying to get her back. lol
HOWEVER....we did have an interesting early morning "activity" the other day...we were unable to finish the "activity" the night before due to someone having a bit too much alchohol in their system...hint hint...and when he woke up for work the next day at 6am, he was all over me. ;0 I won't go any further, but it was a nice wakeup call. haha
This mesg is for GABBY... G, your thread locked up, and I wrote a long mesg, so here it is...
ok. I am glad to hear that you are seeing that your H is showing some sort of interest.
First. of course your don't want your H for who is right now. he's not being himself, and anyone having an A is never themselves. They are living in a delusional world, a self-pleasing world.
BUT. If you can get past who he is right now, and what he is doing, and start living YOUR life, then I truly believe that he could come around. But you need to move on for YOU, and then if he comes around, then wonderful.
All these R talks are just futile. quit it. If he brings them up, then just validate. You know yelling back with arguments will only make him defensive and blame you. Of course he wants to blame you, he doesn't want to admit his wrongdoing, but your making it easy for him to do it. Your making it easy for him to justify him leaving. Start making it hard.
and yes, you can NOT expect anything from him. I know you guys have a child, but in this sitch, you can't expect. unless you want to be hurt and your child be hurt. In time, things will get better in regards to what he does for your D. Unless you never get over this sitch...but I know you will.
A lot of what your H is saying to you is because he's also hurt, he's guilty, he's angry at life, he's just really messed up.
no more R talks okay?
oh, another thing. You keep saying how he doesn't understand love. Obviously he wasn't getting love either. The thing we need to understand is that we all receive love in different ways. Now what he's also going to need to learn is that love is not a feeling. but that will come in time, hopefully sooner than later. I'm not saying that you had to be that perfect wife, but there was something there that he was missing, and I really don't think it was being a perfect wife. I think the biggest problem was you being so emotionally tied to him. I know you were independent doing everything yourself, but I also feel that you were bitter about this and you were not doing these things out of love, and you have been so mentally enveloped in your H, and this is why it is so hard for you to let go. I think this happens a lot. The LBSer is the one who is pulling and pulling emotionally while the WAS is the one who feels drained and pulls themselves further and further away.
I don't know if this is what happened or not. But I do think you lost yourself at some point during the M, most likely when the fertility treatments began and after the baby arrived...and it's so easy to do that because us women are consumed with responsibility, that the H just can't comprehend, but we still have a duty to ourselves to take care of ourselves and put our M first. We can NOT put our baby first. Our M is first. then our babies. this is where many mothers mess up. sure, our babies are vulnerable, and they need considerable care. But when we put our children first, our R with our H's can slowly deteriorate, and therefore puts a rift within the whole family. Of course we should hope that our spouses will just contribute and be the spouse they need to be and do it all together, but we are all human and sinners, not one of us are perfect, so we cannot expect it.
When we put our M first, then it trickles down. The R is healthy, and therefore the R's with the children are healthy. It doesn't mean that you ignore your children, but we need to put our M first and make sure it is good and that the M couple is working as a team. I'm not good at explaining, but I learned this the hard way, and so did my neighbors who were together for 9 years, 6 being M together, had a baby and 1 year later were D'd. They just both didn't get it. And all I could do was be a spectator because neither of them were open to listen.
okay, I'll quit now.
What's important is that you get that house taken care of. You stop allowing R talks, start looking hot, start being fun, start loving life and your H is going to see this and he's gonna want it.
oh, and I'm sure your H is not going to comment on your weight loss, or the house, or whatever. Most likely, he may think...oh, NOW she does these things, but when I was there, she didn't give a crap. blah blah. But him saying you looked pretty was good! I KNOW that your H is noticing these things, and most the time he probably won't say anything because of his pride. YOU just act like the confident little hot mama that you are anyways!
Hiya ST
Looooooooong time no see on my thread
and yeah, I know I've been pretty absent on yours too
How is the singing going & the Mona Vi sales?
I owe you some dance DvD's as soon as I can get the recorder working again
Anyways, I think of you often and just wanted to pop in and show some support!
Best wishes & blessings
CM
PS - I wanted to share this MESSAGE with you bearing in mind my wife IS having an affair and is also expecting a child
July 15, 2008
Love That Never Fails
Mary Southerland
Today's Truth
Hosea 3:1-5 (NCV) The LORD said to me again, "Go, show your love to a woman loved by someone else, who has been unfaithful to you.
In the same way the LORD loves the people of Israel, even though they worship other gods and love to eat the raisin cakes." So I bought her for six ounces of silver and ten bushels of barley. Then I told her, "You must wait for me for many days. You must not be a prostitute, and you must not have sexual relations with any other man. I will act the same way toward you." In the same way, Israel will live many days without a king or leader, without sacrifices or holy stone pillars, and without the holy vest or an idol. After this, the people of Israel will return to the LORD their God and follow him and the king from David's family. In the last days, they will turn in fear to the LORD, and he will bless them.
Friend to Friend
A college man walked into a photography studio with a framed picture of his girlfriend. He wanted the picture duplicated, which involved removing it from the frame. When the photographer took the picture apart, he noticed an inscription written on the back of the photograph:
"My dearest Tom
I love you with all of my heart.
I love you more and more each day.
I will love you forever and ever.
I am yours for all of eternity."
The picture was signed "Diane" and contained a PS that read, "If we ever break up I want this picture back!"
Love that never gives up has no "PS" in it. As Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 13:8 says, "Real love never fails". In this verse, "fails" literally means "collapses, falls or disintegrates". In other words, true love does not collapse under the weight of testing. It will not disintegrate when the pressure is on nor will it fall apart in the hard times. True love is strong and unconditional. True love is God's love, a love that we cannot understand or explain in human terms. The life of the Old Testament prophet, Hosea, powerfully illustrates this kind of love.
Hosea was married to a young woman named Gomer. Together, they had three children. Gomer blew it when she was unfaithful to Hosea, betraying the covenant of marriage. Hosea had every right to walk away, but love that never fails calls us up to higher choices that are beyond human reasoning. Supernatural choices demand supernatural action.
Love that never gives up chooses commitment.
Hosea 3:1a The LORD said to me again, "Go, show your love to a woman loved by someone else, who has been unfaithful to you.
Commitment is almost a foreign concept today. We want commitment to be easy and convenient, painless and cheap. Commitment is none of those things. Commitment never stops trying and never tries stopping. It is a pledge and bond, a covenant and contract. Commitment is a promise.
Cortes, the great Spanish explorer discovered what we know today as Mexico. He sailed in several boats with many men committed to conquering and settling an unknown land. When they arrived, the men looked around at an undiscovered world and were afraid. Cortes, sensing their fear, gathered them all on shore and set fire to their ships. He then announced, "Now there can be no turning back!" That is commitment; a choice never to turn back; a contract without escape clauses; a battle plan with no option for retreat. Love that never gives up can hold on because of commitment. It looks past the circumstance and locks its gaze on the promise.
Hosea had a decision to make. I am sure his feelings told him to run. After all, his heart must have been broken and to risk that kind of pain again seems absurd. His home was on the brink of disaster. Hosea must have been angry and hurt, not to mention embarrassed by Gomer's betrayal. Everyone knew what Gomer was doing because it had been going on for a long time. Hosea wasn't even sure that he was the father of his second and third child.
Hosea chose to stay because he was committed to God, to Gomer and to their marriage. Sometimes, being committed means sacrificing your own happiness for a time in order to redeem the relationship. God called Hosea to commitment -- the first time in marriage -- and now He calls him to show his love "again". The word "show" means "to be a friend or ally". Love that never fails focuses on the needs of others and chooses commitment.
Let's Pray
Father, I have to admit that it is so much easier to turn and run instead of staying simply because of commitment. Forgive me for judging others instead of loving them and giving them the same grace that you have given to me. Please help me to see these difficult people as You see them, through eyes of unconditional love and mercy. Give me the strength to overcome betrayal and hurt in my own life. Help me see the needs around me and then do something about those needs. In Jesus' name, Amen.
Now It's Your Turn
Right now, think of the hardest person in your life to love. Ask God to love them through you, to let you see them through His eyes. Write that person a note of encouragement this week, in Jesus' name.
More from the Girls
I must admit that the story of Hosea and Gomer makes me a little uncomfortable. When I tally the score, Hosea has more than enough points to ditch Gomer. Instead, he not only loves her, but pursues her and forgives her even when she doesn't seem repentant. That doesn't seem fair to me! Love that never fails does not deal in fairness but in grace and we are never more like Him than when we love the unlovable.
If you would like to hear the amazing story of Hosea and Gomer, check out Mary's CD, Love that Never Fails.
oh wow CM. I had no idea she was expecting. I could not imagine what that would feel like.
I didn't realize you still had a thread going though...I guess I stopped checking after a while, I will go back and check on you. SORRY!!!
And actually, the MonaVie is doing good! I had a few people to work with that wanted to do the business, but 2 of them are in Germany doing business now for the next 4 months, but 1 girl I just signed up is very excited because her H's back pain (which was so much like mine) is going away and he's doing things he hasn't done in years!!! I'm so excited!
AND I wrote a song that we will probably play at church!!! I will definitely get it recorded and posted on myspace if we do. We just rehearsed it once last night, me on keyboard singing, the guitar and the drums., I think it sounded pretty cool too. I hope we can do it soon! I'm excited about it.
Well, gotta go, have had a busy week with fam over and bday parties.
I've gotta get back into the grove of being more intimate and initiating with my H again. I've not been doing that as much, as I've gained some of my weight back, and I've just not been as motivated on that part of the R. I definitely don't want to fall into those traps of...lack of self confidence, and lack of intimacy.
I'm also struggling big time with what to do about s10. He has recently been very adamant about NOT going to the public school again, and wanting to go to the private school we looked at. ug. We really cannot afford any private school, but I was hoping, and praying some that God would provide the $ so that he could go. I know that I've lost him in the respect of his R with Christ since he's been in public school, and his grades were just not good, in respect to what he SHOULD have gotten. and I know that he's not in an environment for him to learn the way he needs to in order to strive in school. oh, I wish we weren't in so much debt. but that's my fault, and my H's fault. I wish my H had a desire for him to go to private. He has no wish to pay for school when we can send him for free. I also wish I could homeschool again, but my H will never let me again, and my s10 wants me too, but I said that I would do what my H wants, so that I can allow him to be a leader in our household.
I wish God could give me an answer. and maybe the answer is keeping him where he is since we do not have the money to pay.
They even changed the bus route so that he's farther away and that it will be right by someone in the neighborhood who is a registered sex-offender! and the transportation people won't change it.
Well, I need to go to bed as it's almost 2am!!! and I need to pray more about my s10. I am so bad about praying everyday and reading my bible everyday. It seems the day goes by so fast and I can't get everything done. I need to make a schedule for it. How does everyone else do it? Do you pray while with your children making dinner? or sit down and read while they watch tv? I find it so hard for me. although I do get on here, probably more than I read/pray, but then I feel this is a calling or a ministry for me, and in a way that is worshiping God. right?
okay, goodnight everyone.
((((ST))))
I owe you more soon, but for now, THANKS!!!
oops, it's been so long I don't know what I did to deserve a THANKS Nik!
Well, guess what????? I got to perform my song at church yesterday! With the band too, I was really really nervous, plus the fact that I haven't been sick in a year from drinking my juice, but I've been watching kids and they have ALL gotten sick, so of course I catch somethin...but it's not near as bad as them, but it did cause my voice to be not-so-great, so I know there will be some pitch problems here and there, but I think overall it went good. I will be looking forward to hearing everyones critiques! It was my first "happy" song that I could actually DO in church.
anyways, I'm noticing that H and I are slacking on some things. like ML...we've just been busy and tired, especially with me doing this school care thing now. I can't believe he's been getting up at 6:30am every morning for the last 12 years!
We do have a vaca coming up in a few weeks to Pitts. we'll be watching a penn state AND a steeler game. luckily I love football, or else I'd probably HATE our trip! I've never been to a college game, or at least one that mattered, and I've never been to an actually IN season NFL game, so it should be pretty cool.
One thing though, it seems that he always wants to go on vaca with other people. we've only been on a trip by ourselves twice I think. and this trip we were suppose to have our realy good friends come with us, but something happened and they can't now, so we're both really disappointed, because I'm very close to the wife, and he's been BF with the H since he was in highschool (although they don't talk much) But, it just makes me nervous about how the trip will go because we don't have much in common and I don't want him to be bored with me. I know I need to not focus on these things and just focus on having a good time. It's really hard to do that sometimes when a third of your life has been focused on children and putting yourself last. It's almost as if I don't know what I enjoy anymore, or I don't know HOW to have fun.
I know that this is partly due to me not fully GALing during the sitch. I did GAL, but I was mostly by myself. I have though been more involvd with church since I play in the band now, so that has been good.
Another thing that I would like different is for us to do more things as a family. Life becomes so hectic, that we're never together. I think we've played a board game twice as a family. That seems really pathetic. We have watched a movie here and there, and really it seems like the only thing we do as a family is watch tv. I'm going to have to think of how to change that. My H spent over $100 bucks on a bike, and we've never gone out riding as a family.
HMMMMM.... I know, I need to stop looking at what's wrong and start thinking of solutions! But I'm too LAZY!!! hahaha... I want HIM to do it!
Ok neighbor now I am jealous lol! I love football, and you get to go see the STEELERS? LOL I have all kinds of steeler stuff! I go to a couple college games a year, KU of course lol! I really hope you have a wonderful time!
I am so glad you sung your song at church!! I used to do things like that when I was younger, may have to get back into that again! Theres a church in Valley Center, and I know the pastor, and really like him, and am considering him for my C. I hope you are feeling better now! And yes of course I would love to here about the stuff for health you told me about on my thread!
One thing diff about our lifes, is that we do lots of family things together, even thru all the rough bad times, we still family time. I want US time, that is one thing, that has pushed us to where we are today, no time for us, alone, unless it was bedtime. that is not quality time imho.
Are you ready for rain? Looks like Gustav is gonna dump on us for a few days! I dont know about ya'll down there, but we already have had so much rain this far into the year, that we are inches above our total rainfall for all of 2007!
Hugs to you and have a GREAT day!
oh cool Baby! you like the steelers too?!??! I liked football before, but not so much until I met my H and he is a DIE HARD steeler fan. has the tattoo to prove it. 2 years ago he finally went to his first game in pitts, so he's been really excited to get back.
yes, you definitely need to talk to that pastor! I was kinda wondering if you were out near Valley Center. wouldn't it be crazy if we actually knew each other? that's probably very unlikely, but ya never know!
hey, if you want, I'll be up in Wichita the end of the month, and I can let you try the juice and see if you like it. if you go to my website for it and find out more and a contact email.
http://www.mymonavie.com/crissy I really love it, and it's kept me from getting sick (except this last week, but it wasn't bad at all) for over a year. plus, I used to deal with horrible back pain for the last 15, and my back pain is practically gone now! my kids are way healthier now too, they used to get sick a lot from the kids at school, and now they're hardly ever sick. I know a TON of personal testimonies ranging from fybromyalgia, to sleep disorders, but back pain, lack of energy, and high blood pressure are the biggest ones I hear about.
anyways, thanks for posting! I'm not ready for rain yet, I'd still like to enjoy some more hot weather, we didn't swim much this year, but oh well, I love the rain too.
oh, and yes, you definitely need alone time with your H. the M is first important, then the family comes next. So many of us take a good R with our spouses for granted. I know I did.
hugs to you too!!!
LOL yes I love the steelers! have since I was a kid! one of the few here in kansas probably!!
ITs so wierd to have someone online actually know where valley center is! I live just north of there! LOL we are close in age, so who knows maybe we could have met before lol!
I am gonna check out your site, I did send you an email also from there real quick.
Time, he always has an excuse for time. he said I should be used to it now. guess i should.
oh well, i am back home, and back with my buds I truly missed lol!
ST- Congrats on getting to sing your song!
It's great that you're going away together. Maybe you can read up on some of the previews of the NFL season so you will have something to add if/when you discuss football. What else interests him? Is there something that you could learn to love also?
A suggestion for family time: make one night a week game night or family activity night. Do any of your kids play sports (or they may be too young, sorry I forgot their ages)? Going to the games and practices together is another good way to get together as a family on a regular basis.
that is so ironic baby! I wish I had liked sports more as a kid...I feel like I just inherited the love for the steelers from my H, so I'm not a REAL fan. I do have a Ben jersey though.
I got your email and replied back. Have a wonderful week!!!
New, thanks for the post! those are great ideas. it's so hard just putting them to practice, you know? I had mentioned about 4 months ago, for us to have mom and dad time, just with one kid, and my H said okay, but it still hasn't happened yet. I need to be more proactive! if that's the right word.
My H actually coaches our s4 soccer team, our first practice was tonight, and then he's asst coaching and ref'ing our s10's flag football. it's really amazing, as I just emailed baby that there is NO way he would have done this pre-sitch, and that why I know that everyone has the ability to change!
So, I know we just need to buckle down and do something!
On my learning to love other things...this was something that I kinda felt our contribution to our R was off. I became involved with HIS friends, his love for sports, his music, his food wants, a lot of HIS stuff, but I really can't think of anything he has become involved with MY stuff. he doesn't go to church, even when I get to sing, last time said he would the next time, but this time it just happened to fall on his day to draft for fantasy football (I didn't get upset, and I understood- it sucked though) he would never step foot at a musical. hmmmm. what else do I do. guess maybe I don't do much, but that's how I've felt in the past. I used to let it really bother me and I was bitter, but I've really let that go, and I will always try not to fall into that trap of allowing myself to think that it is up to him to make me happy.
Sooooo, didn't mean to go off on THAT tangent.
LOL what is it with men and fantasy football? heheh thats what i missed last friday! ok sad, did i miss it that much, or miss seeing her see me and watching her squirm? lol We are going to do a family fantasy football league! just with us, I am so excited!! my kids get into it, H sets it up from work. I know how you feel about getting involved in his things, and he not with yours. Years ago we played lots of coed softball together, then we quit as he is so wrapped up in mens ball, and thru all our crap i still always go watch his games, and manage things for him. one thing I did for ME this year, was my best freind and I started a coed team. We played tournaments, and if we had a tournament, I played and didnt go to his. Next thing I know, he comes to play, and he put us in a league where the kids can even play with us, it sucks for me as i dont really feel like playing most of the time, but it sure made him look at me that I would do something as he said find something to do, so i did! He missed it he said. Maybe we both need to find some hobbies or something lol to get them involved with US! hehehe, I didnt read that as a tangent at all lol!
Hey Girl, wanted to let you know that my best friend in Minnesota is sending me the book!! I am so pumped! oh and the OW? I forgot to tell you she goes to OK once a month, wish I knew where lol, you could scope her out lol!
you could scope her out lol!
wouldn't that be tempting!!!
that is really cool that you were in a league with your whole fam. are your kids all that old? my youngest is 4, so we probably couldn't do that for a while, but with my H coaching, that's kinda a family thing since I help out sometimes.
now are you talking about the for women only book? which book?
yes they are that old lol! oldest 16 youngest to be 12 on the 11 of this month! its awesome us all being together, somethign I TRY to no throw in his face altho its hard sometimes!
hehehehe yeah i wish u could scope her out, altho you would see her and go omfg, that cant be!! then smack H upside his head lol!
I got DB! she got be DB! woot woot!
ST
Words of wisdom to go with everyone else's? Some more changes going on.
SMW
SMW, huh??? I think I'm missing something. yes....part of my brain!
baby, wow, you have a 16 year old. I do NOT want to think about how my s10 will be when he's 16! yikes! very scary~!
an ya, I know what you mean by throwing things in their face, but it would only cause a fight or resentment for H, and we DON'T want that, so yes, sometimes we must bite our tongue.
okay, I need to get some motivation to work out. this is bad, after my James diet (that's what I call my 2 wk depression of no eating losing 10 lbs) I kept that same weight for a whole year...then the next thanksgiving came, and after that I gained 10 lbs over the course of 4 months. I HATE that! now I'm back to my same weight again. I know I need to excercise, but I'm such a procrastinator when it comes to that, plus there is so much else that needs to be done, so I think, unless I have time for an hour, why bother doing anything. that's not a good way to think I know.
So, who wants to join me in a get-fit race????
Crissy--
When you get a chance, teh letter to my H is on my thread. Please read it and give me some input.
Laura
SMW, here's that letter I wrote to my H years ago during our sitch.
He was leaving to go on a motorcycle and just camp out for a weekend or week at grand lake. I wasn't sure if OW would be there (and I found out from receipts for gas that he met her later, or else picked her up or something. have no idea what, but it's in the past now) anyways, I wanted him to read this and that maybe he would have some type of conviction while he was away.
James I hope you had lots of fun in ***. Hopefully your reading this when your suppose to
I just want you to know that I will always be here for you. I am still your best friend and probably anyone else would be hating you or pushing you away, but I am not everyone else. Because I am letting God have control of this situation, he has released my anger and pain. He has opened my eyes to the woman I have been playing. I have not been the woman God has called me to be bu, He is changing me, and has changed me and I'm excited about that! I want you to know that no matter how hard, bad, sinful, painful our lives can be, Jesus has died for us so that we do not have to be bound by those.
Ephesians 2:4 "But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ, even when we were dead in sin- it is by grace you have been saved."
As I write this, I'm thinking how proud and excited I am for you when you go riding alone around the lake. I hope God fills your heart with peace and understanding.
You are a man of worth and you are priceless. You have so much to give to our children and everyone around you.
Be careful out there, have a wonderful time and we will be waiting patiently for you and can't wait to hear how your trip went!
In God's Love, Crissy
I never posted it on here (I don't think anyways) so I never had any critiques so there are things on there I wouldn't have said now.
OK well it only took me like a month to catch up on ya
Sorry!!
I am sooo excited that you got to play with the band in church! Cold or not, that's great.
OMG... I have the same slacking issues with H... the ML, the GAL.. first things to go, right?
Hmmm the vaca with other people. This is something that REALLY bothered me with H at first too. I actually was b!tchy enough about it that we ONLY went on trips by ourselves unless it was a wedding or something with family around. Recently I've been able to understand why he likes friends along (more "excitement") and why I like just us ("quality time/intimacy")... it seemed to help. We've taken a few trips where it's "just us" for the first 2 days then friends joined us later. Would that maybe work for you?
I soo wish I was but not so ready for the get-fit race. I know, I suck!! Least I'm honest.
I think it's a great goal!! And one of mine soon, just not quite yet.
Thanks for always being such an awesome friend, ST.
Thanks Nik. and I don't mind waiting a month.
wow, so you made your H do only couple vaca's. I actually didn't have the guts to make him do anything, I would just be depressed about it, and try to act like it didn't bother me. how pathetic is that????
I'm actually disappointed about our friends not going though. cause she's a really good friend now an helped me thru my sitch. I'm also kinda nervous about just going alone. See, that is soo weird. that's why I'm still kinda shocked that we are still together. I wonder how he feels, if he's awkward too.
thanks Nik for being honest.
I'm not ready yet either! haha
----------------------
well, my H is not fired...thank goodness for now. He plans to quit sometime, but we're not ready yet. and we'd rather him leave on HIS terms not theirs. maybe I didn't post this, but he got suspended again. so messed up, but supposedly he'll actually get paid for these days. guess we will find out for certain tomorrow when he goes in.
ST--
I have responded and wanted your input, so I thought I would try to hit your thread and see if it scared you up.
SMW
Just a note that I will be heading out of town tomorrow! will be back on Wed or thur, but may be able to check in at my moms. We'll be in pittsburgh watching a steeler game! hoping we can do some fun stuff together as well, since we'll be alone this time.
I just got an questionaire if you will, on my aunt and her request for anulment of her M. ugh. don't really want to do it. it's annonymous, but still, when you feel in your heart that every M could be saved, and that M is suppose to be for life, it's hard to take my aunts side. He did have his problems, could't hold a job well, drank too much, may have done some pot here and there, and had some anger problems, but my aunt had problems of her own. she was very controlling, handled everything, would treat him almost as a child, so it was a huge cycle that just got worse and worse. and he would try so hard, but it would be TOO hard that it was annoying and eventually she was disgusted by him. I suppose all I will do is try to answer the questions as honestly as possible. yuck.
------------------
alright, so I've decided that I'm as big as I was pre-bomb, and I'm very upset with myself! so, I'm fasting in some way this week, well, eating less anyways. It's very good for your body to fast for a few days (fasting as in only eating fruits, or only liquids, not actual starvation fast) every few months. I was getting into a bad habit of eating too much, so this will be good for me. I have also tried to do more exercises again, but it's hard.
I've also decided that I need to start being positive about everything. I really complain too much, and I need to wrap myself around everything that is good and pleasing to God! There are many things in my life where things are not going the way I had hoped. Things that are harder or disappointing. But I cannot let those things attack me, and I will take them in as lessons. God is still teaching me patience, as my childcare business is harder than I would have thought...having 7 boys in my house, that's too much testosterone! I even ended up praying over a 9 year old that got way way way out of hand, I didn't even let him on the bus, it was that bad. maybe someday I'll tell ya what happened, but it was aweful! then, I have felt that the enemy has really attacked me on my monavie bus. there have been several people that were very excited to do it with me, and then they disappear! I mean, I don't THINK I'm a crazy person that people decide all the sudden they don't like me??? There are so many people becoming so successful with it, and I think I've had this belief in my mind that it won't ever work for me, so now I'm making it come true. I've had so many let downs in my life, and we've always been on the poor side, or lacking side, so I've never seen anything higher for myself, I've always seen myself at the bottom. I'm never going to quit though because it's changed my life and so many of my friends, so I will always tell people about it no matter what happens on the business side of it.
okay, I should pray since my s4 is asleep, and I need to do that more often, and especially for all of you.
love you all!!!
Hi ST,
I'm not an "exerciser" either but I suggest signing up for a weekly class. If you pay for it, and it's a regularly scheduled event, you will be more likely to go. At least that's how it works for me. I go to yoga once a week (through our community center).
I didn't realize that you do child care in your home. Seven boys at once! God bless you! I know I couldn't deal with more children than I already have, so I admire you.
Take care and enjoy your trip!
thanks new!
I know, I probably should try a class. I was doing so well with the p90x videos, I did them 5xs a week for about a month, and they were the hardest things ever! but I went somewhere, and when I came back, I just never got back into it. The problem was, I was eating more to compensate for all the work I was doing, but then I didn't compensate my food back down.
I do have a membership to a gym, but I really feel like I have no time at all. I really don't want to give up being on here, but this is what I do in my spare time. I think I need to be better scheduled. I'm just not a schedule kind of person, as I like to do things when I want to do them. but perhaps God is trying to teach me something and trying to get me to be more responsible with my time. ?????
well, I was very upset with H today, as he was suppose to come back a day or two later from me so he could visit more friends, and come back in time to coach the soccer game. Well, guess what. I knew something would happen, and maybe I didn't put enough faith in him, but he ends up getting up late (which would have put him at the game just before it started) and locked his keys in the car. He would NEVER do that. He's just not dingy like that. The whole time we were gone I kept mentioning, you'll be there for the game right? I do not want to coach the game. and he said he would, but he never really wanted to.
so, we had a little fight, cause he was mad that he'd have to pay $50 bucks, and I wasn't totally acting like I believed him. I mean really, it seems awefully convenient, and how would I know otherwise?!? well, it was true, and he finally got here 5 hours later, bought some steaks, and mowed the lawn. So, I can't stay mad at him forever. I did tell him I was extremely disappointed when I found out.
Here is something I received from my business team. It is really good.
"When your reasons to move forward outweigh your excuses for staying put, you will move forward. When your thirst for success is more powerful than the desire to stay within your comfort zone, you will succeed.
When the reward is meaningful enough, you will act. When you connect your deepest purpose with the goals you set, those goals will be achieved.
When you understand that there is a real and accessible pathway to the most magnificent dreams you can dream, you?ll get yourself on the path. When you know without a doubt that every action has a consequence, you?ll focus all your actions in a positive and valuable direction.
When you love what you do, you?ll do it with grace and ease and excellence. When you do what you love, you?ll provide a steady stream of unique and extraordinary gifts to life.
When you are completely clear about your why, you?ll be able to figure out how. When you let go of the need to need, you?ll fall into a massive sea of beautiful abundance.
When you are ready, life is here to fully live. Choose it, and now is when."
Hey sissy, omg what is going on with our football team? UGH!! I wanna cry already LOL!
Saw the movie, think I need to TALK to you to figure it out,thats what weekdays are for right? thank you for coming to see me, not only for the juice, but I felt good, thank you!
hey your welcome! you should be about out of the juice too, I hate for you to run out, otherwise it's like starting all over again, but whatever you'd like to do, just let me know. I left some at my moms just in case.
ya, I do want to hear how the movie thing went. not sure if I'll have MY H go, but smw told me to pray, and that's what I should do.
oh, the team?!? ya, again, James thankfully refrained from his obscenities, but boy did he wish we were all gone so he could! at least they still pulled a win though. ugh! you woulda been proud though, we all sported our steeler stuff! now, we just need to get the dog a jersey!
No Small Affair
Lysa TerKeurst
“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.”
1 Corinthians 13:6 (NIV)
Devotion:
A few years ago, I sat with a beautiful young woman and watched the tears stream down her face. Six months before our meeting, her world was filled with so much – a loving husband, a healthy toddler, and fun friends.
Life was full.
But some part of her heart still felt restless, unsettled, and a little empty.
She started to feel detached from her husband and disappointed in their relationship. Why couldn't he make her feel loved? Wasn’t he supposed to right her wrongs, fill up her insecurities, and give her a lasting feeling of love?
Then one day she met a man who said things she'd longed to hear her husband say. He made her feel pretty and witty. Soon, she rationalized that she'd never really loved her husband in the first place. A web of lies was spun. She fell into the arms of the other man.
She had not wanted to come to the women's retreat. She knew it might make her feel guilty and she was past having any guilty feelings. She was just waiting for the right time to leave her husband and start over with the new love of her life. But her friends had started to grow suspicious of her pulling back from so many church activities. So, to appease them, she went.
Over the course of the weekend, the walls she'd so carefully constructed to keep everyone at a distance and her secret safe started to crumble. By Saturday night, she sat down with me and confessed her affair. She desperately wanted to know how I felt so full of God's love. She was now convinced it wasn't the love of another man her heart craved; it was the love of God.
Chasing love outside the will of God invites the exact opposite of love into our lives. 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8 is picture of God's perfect love. It is patient. It is kind. It does not envy... it is not self-seeking... it does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth... it always protects... it always perseveres. Love never fails. The things we chase in this world are opposite from God's love. False attempts at love will make us impatient, unkind, envious, self-seeking, resistant to the truth, reckless and temporary.
1 Corinthians 13 is not a description of what is inherently ours when we fall in love with another person. It is a description of God's love. This kind of love can be ours as we become more Christ-like. It is never focused inwardly. It is never about what I'm going to get from another person. It is deciding that this is the kind of love I will give away.
I am challenged by this. Because our souls were designed for God's fulfilling love, if we aren't staying closely connected to Him everyday, our hearts will start to feel empty. Restless. Unfulfilled.
Let us never get to the place where we think we are strong enough to not be tempted in this way. If we are all completely honest, we are only a few bad decisions away from the same kind of mess my sweet friend is now trying to untangle herself from. While I have complete hope in God's ability to restore her, the consequences of her chase for love will be severe on many levels.
The kind of love our souls crave will never be found in the things of this world. Lasting and perfectly satisfying love will only be found when we stop chasing the wrong kind of love and start living out the truths of God.
Dear Lord, help me rest in the security of Your love. Make me wise in how I guard my heart. May I never get lured into any kind of worldly, fake love. But if I ever start to get drawn away, God surround me with people who are bold enough to speak truth into my life. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
<<<<<<Tears of compassion and love.
Thank you for sharing, Crissy. You are right, we are all just a few steps away from our own fall from grace. Only through continual reaffirmation of our love for the Lord are we able to walk in faith and grace.
SMW
thanks SMW, I got that in an email, and thought I had to share it.
so, I haven't posted my own stuff recently, mostly because nothing much happens.
well, I saw H's phone sitting out and thought, ug, okay just gonna look at it. Well, he had all these naked girls pictures on there, and they ALL had boobs the size of mount rushmore. It really made me sick to my stomach. I know that some wives don't care if their H's look at porn or playgirl or whatever, but it really makes me feel bad. I keep wondering if this is something I just need to give to God and pray about it and pray for my H, or if I should say anything. It's been almost a week now since I saw them, and for the last few days, I've been kinda distant, or just annoyed by my H, and I think that might be why. Especially yest for some reason. I really couldn't figure out why I was so annoyed by him. He even asked what was my deal and where the attitude came from. It wasn't like a really rude attitude, but I was being rude/playful.
Soooo, I am wondering if I should bring it up YET again. I'm not really sure what else I would say, because I've said it before when he was paying for porn online. You know, if he would compliment me and treat me like I'm beautiful, then i probably wouldn't care so much, but he doesn't, never really did either, always said that wasn't his style, but when I remember that darned text that he sent to OW about how she was gorgeous, a word he's NEVER come close to describing me, not even beautiful, so it's hard not to feel less attractive.
okay, gotta go take kids, I'll be back.....
Crissy--
You know what I am going to tell you, right? You have to let it go and give it to God. He will deal with your husband on this in His time. God brought him home, God will take care of this, too.
{{{{{HUGS}}}}}
SMW
So do you think I shouldn't even say anything? I mean, even just apologizing for being weird lately because I had seen the pictures on your phone and it just hurt my feelings or something?
I had kinda decided today that I should probably say something, because I still feel weird towards him. Although strangely, last night he actually grabbed me to lay beside him, which he hasn't done in a while, and today after work while I was cooking he started groping me.
which ALSO hasn't happened in a while, and it did totally turn me on, but sometimes just looking at him makes me feel weird. It's hard to explain. I was actually kinda sick to my stomach for a while, so I used it to my benefit as I was trying to lose some weight again, hahah! I know isn't that a little twisted? yes, I'm weird.
okay, gotta go wipe a bottom.
s4, not my H. haha
well, thought maybe I'd get some action last night lol, but yest morn we found a 4 wk old kitten right by our garage and so she slept on me all night. My boxer is going crazy over it too. Then we have a stray dog hanging out on my porch. so crazy.
anyways, I'll post some positives today instead.
I'm going to Wichita to have a fun MV party, and I Baby might be there too! We're gonna just throw a real party afterwards, have no idea what we'll do, but my mom has a good sized basement with a pooltable, so we'll figure somethin out!
Then, I am starting a band! I've got a drummer, and we're still looking for possible bassist and guitarist, but we plan on meeting Nov 15 to see what we can do. He sounds like he's on track with his faith, bout the same age as me, and interested in close to the same music, so it should be good. We're looking for an evanescence/fireflight type of sound, alternative/rock, so I'm really excited. My H is not however.
I asked him why he didn't seem very happy for me and he said because he thinks if I'm really making a band, we'll be practicing 2-3 times a week, and I said, nuhuh, not gonna do that, maybe once a week. I said, it depends how good you are anyways, some people don't need much practice. Hopefully, that will be me. lol so, I don't know why he's not excited for me, unless he's maybe a little jealous, or it really is because I'll be gone more.
But wouldn't that be cool to have your wife in a band??? I would think so. oh well, I'll just have to act as if, and make sure I'm not abusing the time I spend. I'll probably have to spend less time on here, which I have been doing a little. It's just so hard to catch up with everyone if you've been away for more than a couple days.
well, I plan on making this a better day today....
oh, please say prayers for two people,
1. Amber, who is 25 and never had problems, but went in to doc because of sickness, and now they say she has leukemia!
2. mother of Jennifer (a mom of a child a bbsit for) just found out she has cancer throughout her body.
I gave both of them some mv because of the fighting power it has on cancer cells and hopefully they will have the desire to drink it, and I'm praying for miracles. I couldn't imagine being 25 and finding out I had leukemia. They were trying to have a baby too even.
Hi ST,
I can relate to your feelings on finding the porn on h's phone. It really bothers me too. Did you say anything to him?
As far as you starting a band, it sounds cool and exciting but your h may not see it that way. He is probably worried about it taking you away from the kids. Maybe when you finalize practice times, he'll feel better?
I'm sorry about your friends who are so sick.
thanks New,
I have not said anything to him yet. I went to Wichita for a night, and when I got back, I didn't feel so weird with him, so I think the time away helped. I've told him before why it hurts my feelings, but I think he's figuring I have no idea he has them. What's really upsetting is that I've sent him pics of ME, and they are not there, just those disgusting ones of oversized boobies!
I watch the kids so much, I'm not sure how he would think this would take away too much time, unless it's more HE'S having to watch them more. They are hard to deal with sometimes, and kids can be stressful. So it's not like he doesn't want to be around them, but he lets them get to him too easily. But, your probably right. I'll see what happens after we start meeting.
just found out that Jennifer's mom is getting a new form of chemo, lazerknife or something like that, it just spot treats it for 5 minutes so it doesn't do the whole body. Well, I guess she has the cancer all throughout her body except her brain, liver, and some other organs which I guess is rare for it not to go everywhere. She has also been drinking monavie and the doctor has encouraged her to use natural remedies which is awesome. They've only done the chemo on the two biggest lumps, her back and hip and they've reduced in size. She also had one under her breast and it's now 1/3 of the size (and they haven't even treated it! Go monavie!) So luckily things are going in the right direction! Thank you for the prayers!
Crissy--
Glad to hear that she is doing better! The woman who does my mom's hair sells monavie, too. They suggested it to my mom because of my anemia problems. Maybe I will give it a try. Shame I cannot give it to H to make him nicer to me. SIGH
SMW
haha smw, that's funny! you know, a lot of people find that it helps with depression. So, ya never know!! lol
and hey, if you wanna try it, let me send you a bottle! unless your moms hairdresser is a really good friend. It helps me when people buy it under me, or from me, but I don't like to step inbetween people if there is a family member or good friend that they know. But I would pay for your signup fee if you really wanted to try it, then you can get it wholesale yourself. You've helped me so much, you've been such an inspiration to all of us here.
you know, I started thinking about the whole pictures on his phone deal. Sometimes I think that maybe I should give it to God, but I've also thought that we never had good communication, and I would get bitter about stuff, and maybe this is an opportunity for me to learn how to communicate better about things that are important to me.
Crissy--
Could use some spiritual guidance and wisdom on how to deal with things. Check the end of my last thread, before the mods locked it.
SMW
SMW...I think we talked on the phone after this right? Did you get your answer that you needed?
----------------
Well, I'm getting closer to my band...as I have a drummer, a guitarist, another possible guitarist and bass player! yea! I'm really excited, except just found out I'll need to get a PA, or equipment that will allow my voice and keyboard to be heard, so that might not be cheap. darn!
happy Holy-ween everyone! that's what our church is calling it, we'll be doing a fun carnival like thing there tomorrow. fun fun!
1. God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts.
2. Dear God, I have a problem, it's me.
3. Growing old is inevitable . growing UP is optional.
4. There is no key to happiness. The door is always open.
5. Silence is often misinterpreted but never misquoted.
6. Do the math. count your blessings.
7. Faith is the ability to not panic.
8. Laugh every day, it's like inner jogging.
9. If you worry, you didn't pray. If you pray, don't worry.
10. As a child of God, prayer is kind of like calling home everyday.
11. Blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape.
12. The most important things in your house are the people.
13. When we get tangled up in our problems, be still.
God wants us to be still so He can untangle the knot.
14. A grudge is a heavy thing to carry.
15. He who dies with the most toys is still dead.
(someone emailed this to me, thought it was applicable!)
Hey ST
I kind of figured I was long overdue for a visit over here. You make frequent stops to mine and so many other threads and just so I just did not want to drag my feet on coming over here to your little corner of the board.
Howz the keyboard playing band stuff progressing?
I'll be thinking of you if I get around to watching any Steelers action this w/e (I think they are playing somebody).
On another note ... I will add to your list of those in critical medical states, a 20 year neighbor of my folks. SHe is a 65ish old wife and mother who never smoked but managed to get what started off as lung cancer and has now spread throught her whole body and her brain. I talked to her H the other day when I hasd the oportunity. I did not want to pass on the chance to let him know I was thinking and praying for them.
Gotta go fly. Be well and do as the Lord instructs.
Thank you T, I appreciate you stopping by! I don't get many, but I love the few that I get!
the band is still progressing... I'm printing out chord sheets for popular songs from Air One( the christian rock station) so that we can all play something we're familiar with and learn to blend as a band. I'm just hoping they all like the songs I've written! and that they fit with what we are hoping to do. I do need to find some things first, like speakers and stuff, so that will cost me some money, hopefully I can find some used stuff.
on your neighbor, that is sad to hear, especially when she never smoked. My moms neighbor of 74, also had lung cancer and never smoked. It was his second bout of cancer in fact, but he is doing so remarkably now and the doctors have been incredibly impressed and told him whatever you are doing, don't stop doing it! Well, he's been drinking the monavie. It really does fight cancer, (the acai berry was studied to cause a selfdestruct in 86% leukemia cells) and it boosts the immune system which is such a good thing while going thru chemo. I would love for her to try it, so if you'd like to share that with her, let me know what she says. I will also pray for her too, as I know God brings about miracles every day.
Crissy--
Check pawn shops for the band equipment. They often have it there, as musicians are notorious for needing money and deciding to pawn their gear
. Another good place would be a local music store. See if they have a bulletin board or know of some other places where you can get used equipment. I am so happy that the band is pulling together for you!!
SMW
thanks SMW!!! Those are good ideas. I wish I was more technological.
Here is an email I received, an encouraging one.
For those of you who are new, my name is Judy Rousseau and my husband Paul and I are blessed to be enjoying life in a restored marriage. (Paul’s been home since April of 1995 after a three and a half year separation. If you’ve not read our story, you can find it here:
http://www.voxtrot.org/Paul&Judy.html) Today I’d like to ask you a few questions …
Have family and friends said things like:
You need to move on and find someone else who will love you the way you deserve to be loved …
Get a backbone and stand up to that good-for-nothing you married …
Get over it, divorce happens …
I saw your husband (or wife) with the other person and they looked so happy …
Why do you want your husband (or wife) back? He (or she) doesn’t want you …
Have you heard your husband (or wife) say:
Look, I just don’t love you anymore and I’m not happy …
We’re too very different people … and probably shouldn’t have gotten married in the first place …
Lots of people get divorced, what’s the big deal …
This person I’m involved with loves me much more than you ever did …
I’ve told you before and I’ll tell you again … I’M NEVER COMING HOME …
Have you heard comments like this from people in the church:
God can only do so much …
Reconciliation may not be possible in your case …
Maybe this is God’s way of bringing someone better into your life…
God only helps those who help themselves …
Remember your husband (or wife) must be willing to change …
And how about the thoughts rolling around in your head. Things like:
I must be crazy. Maybe I made this whole standing thing up …
This is so painful I can’t take it anymore …
I can’t figure out any way this mess I’m in can ever change …
I’m so tired of living like this …
What difference will it make if I give up …
If you’ve thought some of those thoughts and heard some of the comments mentioned above, I want you to know I HEARD AND THOUGHT THOSE THINGS TOO!!! But you know what???????? I’m not there anymore.
God did work a miracle of restoration for Paul and I but he worked it out through a process of time. What He did for us, He is well able to do for you and your family.
Even though it’s difficult to do, stop focusing on your circumstances, the things people say and even on the way you feel. Be like David and encourage yourself in the Lord by meditating on His Word. Refuse to let your mind wander off into an endless list of worries.
Dear brother, dear sister, press on. You are so not alone even though it may feel like it at times. The Lord has seen your tears and heard your cries. He has not forgotten you. He loves you and His plans for you are GOOD.
Well I gotta get some tax paperwork done and postmarked before the end of the day so I’ll close for now.
I’ll write or podcast again soon.
Lots of love,
Judy Rousseau
Hi ST
Hope you are having a terrific day. I have been really off today. Not dealing well with the recent turn of events between me and my darling. I know that my sitch is far better than many others on here though. I do not need to be a whiner. The Lord is at work on my W's heart I am sure.
I was able to reel off that last sentence mostly due to becoming refreshed from reading my just rec'd Standing Firm e-letter from Rejoice Ministries. I enjoy them and they keep me in line.
Gotta go get some dinner and go check on the pooch. Bye for now. Thanks for your cont'd prayers. You'll have them from me of course. Make beautiful music for our Lord.
thank you T. I know it must be tough for you. It's been quite a while and you've had many ups and downs, but I don't think this down is as bad as in the past is it? And it doesn't matter how bad because God works through all bad situations no matter how aweful they may seem.
eat well and take care
----------------------------------------
Just need some prayers for our associate pastor and his wife. they were having their 5 baby, and the day after her due date they didn't feel the baby move, so they went in and there was no heartbeat. The baby had died with the cord wrapped around it's neck. It was so sad at church today, but he preached anyways, and preached about the gift they received, Samuel, and that instead of a rattle, he is holding palm branches praising God, and instead of a bottle, he has the living water,...can't remember the rest, but it was very moving.
We will be holding a memorial service tomorrow night for the baby. Please keep Sara and Vicor Hintz in your prayers. thank you
Prayers to your pastor and his wife. How tragic to lose a baby at the time you are expecting such joy. Your pastor's strength and God's grace are mightily visible in his being able to walk to the altar and offer such a moving sermon and testimony to his lost son.
SMW
The Steelers are going DOWN!!
There will be no joy in Pittsburgh tomorrow, GO SKINS!!
SMW
No WAY!!!! My Ben will triumph!
thank you for the prayers SMW.
It's all about prayers. Every day something new to be prayed for. I will place the Hinz's in the prayer list. Very sad.
Your Ben ...ha! I thought you were talking about Afleck or one of those other knuckleheads. You were talking about the one who needs traing wheels on his motorciccle. I hope he has a good game. I am still tv-less and computer-less so the most I will be doing is listening on the radio to the conclusion with passive interest in a Steeler's victory.
Your Ben ...ha! I thought you were talking about Afleck or one of those other knuckleheads. You were talking about the one who needs traing wheels on his motorciccle. I hope he has a good game. I am still tv-less and computer-less so the most I will be doing is listening on the radio to the conclusion with passive interest in a Steeler's victory.
OMG T!! I just spit coffee everywhere!! LMAO!!!
SMW
goog luck w/ the clean up SMW. Didn't mean to cause such an explosive reaction. Guess I underestimate the humor I am capable of. I have always been the joker and the one who keeps everything loosened up of my P's three kids.
hey T, I take offense!
jus kidn. Ben has been through a lot of injuries it seems. and yet again dealing with one, but I was very impressed by Byron, I mean he completed how many passes?? practically all of them. It was great! and I just love how aggressive Hines is, he will block for anyone!
and thank you T for the prayers, I know they would appreciate it dearly.
okay, if anyone wants to hear one of the songs I've written, I recorded myself with my cell phone and emailed it to me! so hook me up on FB or something, or just send an email to me and I'll forward it over... then you guys can give me some opinions!
Well, I've got a week or so before meeting with my band! Is this crazy? We've got a drummer, 2 guitarists and a bass player, all M guys and I think they all have kids. Their all christians, so this should be really cool. A couple of them are into more heavier rock than me, but they know we're going for a more alternative rock, evanescence kinda sound, so I'm really excited...and nervous too kinda. Although I should know that God does not give us a spirit of fear, and our goal is to glorify God thru this, so I will just give it all to God's hands, and if I'm suppose to do it, then it will all work out!
Just came breezing by and didn't want to fail to see hi 2 ya.
I hope you are at peace and are filled with the Holy Spirit.
Can't wait to pray tonight. Last night was awesome in that regard. Your family will be included. Peace.
thanks T... what happened last night? in a group? by yourself?
A group of two ..me and the Lord. That is the most common way for me. Though I have enjoyed the prayers and the fellowship that I have experienced the few times that I have been able to join the "Standers" group that I was steered to from a few guys on here. I probably make every third or fourth monthly gathering/social that they have. My "work" (ha ha) schedule is kind of limiting in that regard. But, I have played hooky a few times & was glad that I did.
I hope you are doing great. Staying healthy in a multitude of ways along with your family. COntinue making/composing that beautiful music for the honor and glory of our Lord.
Crissy--
Check your email!
Laura
Hey
You must be a very busy girl. I miss ya. Hope everything is peaceful and the blessings are abundant. luv ya.
fine ..just treat me like a red-headed stepchild ..real nice!!
let me go and check on the steelers score to see if i can razz you some more.
you can resurface anytime now. could use your specialness around here. guess i gotta stand in line for it. where is the # machine like at the deli or whatever..
i am sapped of a whole lot of my sweetness (it is actually debatable on it's original levels).
i stand and i wait. wait & stand. then I sigh ...
T you are cute.
I know, I'm getting really busy now. I probably can't get on here as much anymore, especially if I want to make sure my M stays on course.
T, just find me in the alt uni... but wait, you have my email anyways.
I'm not sure that you'll think my music is beautiful, as it's alternative rock! speaking of, I had my first meeting with the guys, and we worked for 5 hours sat! we're going to meet every friday now. they really liked a couple of my songs, so I'm excited.
SMW, did I reply to your email? I can't remember. I've got like 4 jobs now! I did ship that stuff to ya, so let me know when you get it, probably on wed or thurs. how are you doing? I hope good.
luv all you guys, thanks for checkin in on me. you guys can contact me anytime you need
ST - long time no talk! I've been kinda avoiding the boards for a bit.. mental sanity thing. I know you understand!
I'd love to hear your latest song(s) though. Email them to me?
hey Nik! yes, it has been a while. I've also been away too, as I can tell my H is getting frustrated with all that I'm doing now.
I will send that email, I'll have to find your address again, I don't always save them.
also, another death in the family, this time James uncle. We didn't know him well, and he's been ill for a long while, so many health problems, and was still smoking constantly. (hint hint for those of my friends still doing it..you know who you are!! lol) so it wasn't a surprise, but nevertheless, it's always a shock to lose someone, especially only 60s. So, we'll be leaving for Wichita again this tuesday. This time I'll be possibly singing an Elvis song! guess he was a big elvis fan.
so, everyone please keep in contact with me, as I'm very concerned for all of you, but I may not always be able to check on you all. But remember, I am still here, and if anyone needs me just hollar!
I sure do miss chattin with you, so much so that I had to move over here to be closer to you. LOL. what the heck have you been up to. just kinda answered my own question by looking up above there ..singing Elvis tunes at funerals huh. Your something else.
Much love to you along with prayers & Christ's pervasive peace.
hey T... I'll have to find your new thread then. I never go the way other people do, I go to my past posts and/or check your past posts to find them. what's it called? so I know what I'm looking for.
and luckily I didn't sing, and I'm glad as it would have been stressful trying to smush that in. I need to start cutting out things in my life, not adding things in.
thanks for the pop in, you can email me anytime too as I'm not getting on here as much, just too busy and I need to cut some things out to make sure my H isn't feeling pushed out.
was just thinking of you. Hope you are adhering to the Lord's plan and that you are experiencing all the wonderful fruits of that plan. I will pray the Spirit finds you and brings great joy your way and to your family.
It has been quite a long while since I have penned any poetic ramblings. Might have to try to harness some of that creativity if the Lord allows.
Peace to you & your's my dear ST
thank you T
you should definitely let that creativity loose! I'm also learning a lot in that as well.
Had another band meeting. I think we did a lot this time working on my song. next week is one of the other guy's song, so that will be a whole new experience for me, to try to think of things for someone elses work.
one thing I know I'm going to have a hard time with is having a stage presence. having a personality on stage rather than just letting words come out of my mouth. I've always had choreography or something that told me what to do, nothing that I just did cause it was me. My drummer told me that was something I need to do, discover ME, and let it out. That he thinks I have a lot hidden in there and I'm guarding it. problem is, I'm not sure what I'm hiding!!! I used to be crazy silly retarded when I was younger, and since being M and having kids, I've really gotten old. I haven't been that weird person in almost 15 years so it's kinda hard to try to get that back.
anyways, I told him, I'll definitely be praying about it!
so, that's it for me. God bless all of you!
oh, and I'm gonna post a positive message for those believers out there.
Faith
"And they took offense at him. But Jesus said to them, 'Only in his hometown and in his own house is a prophet without honor.' And he did not do many miracles there because of their lack of faith." Matthew 13:57-58
Jesus is all-powerful but we can put limits on his power by our lack of faith. Do you have low expectations that Jesus can heal your marriage? Have you put limits on the Lord through your lack of faith? God's work can sometimes be hidden, even denied to those who refuse to believe in Jesus' miracle-working power. It is so critical that when we pray, we pray with faith and great expectation that the Lord will work things out on our behalf.
"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1
You need to believe deep down in your heart that the Lord will heal your marriage in due time. In the physical, there may be no indication whatsoever that this will happen. With expectant faith, focus on the result, not at your current circumstances.
"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:6
God is displeased by lack of faith. When you seek him in faith with all your heart, God will reward that faithfulness.
"'But my righteous one will live by faith. And if he shrinks back, I will not be pleased with him.' But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved." Hebrews 10:38-39
Step out in boldness, faithfully proclaiming that the Lord will heal your marriage. If you lack faith, claiming defeat, so it will be. How does one obtain faith such as this? You need to keep your eyes on Jesus.
"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Hebrews 12:2-3
You may be saying, "My faith is weak. I am weary from the battle. My faith is wavering. I doubt that God can deliver my family from destruction." Your struggle is understandable.
Satan uses discouragement to get you to quit, ensuring that your marriage will never be restored. He wants you to lose faith that God is capable of healing your marriage. Do not give in to discouragement and a lack of faith.
Thankfully, it does not take great faith for God to act on your behalf.
"I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." Matthew 17:20
Do you know how small a mustard seed is? I had no idea how big a mustard seed was so I bought a jar at the grocery store. I wrote the above scripture on a three-by-five card, displaying it with my jar of mustard seed in a prominent place in my home. This was a constant reminder that even with my small faith, God was capable of moving the mountain of divorce.
In Matthew 21:18-22, Jesus teaches his disciples that they can pray for anything in faith. Jesus was hungry after a long journey. Seeing a fig tree, he went up to it but found that it had no fruit. He said to it, "May you never bear fruit again! Immediately the tree withered" (Mt. 21:19). The disciples asked Jesus why the tree had withered so quickly.
"Jesus replied, 'I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what we have done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, "Go, throw yourself into the sea," and it will be done. If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.'" Matthew 7:21-22
Faith is crucial in receiving healing as demonstrated numerous times in Scripture...
"Just then a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak. She said to herself, 'If I only touch his cloak, I will be healed.' Jesus turned and saw her. 'Take heart, daughter,' he said, 'your faith has healed you.' And the woman was healed from that moment." Matthew 9:20-22
"While he was saying this, a ruler came and knelt before him and said, 'My daughter has just died. But come and put your hand on her, and she will live.' Jesus got up and went with him, and so did his disciples. When Jesus entered the ruler's house and saw the flute players and the noisy crowd, he said, 'Go away. The girl is not dead but asleep.' But they laughed at him. After the crowd had been put outside, he went in and took the girl by the hand, and she got up." Matthew 9:18-19, 23-25
"As Jesus went on from there, two blind men followed him, calling out, 'Have mercy on us, Son of David!' When he had gone indoors, the blind men came to him, and he asked them, 'Do you believe that I am able to do this?' 'Yes Lord,' they replied. Then he touched their eyes and said, 'According to your faith will it be done to you' and their sight was restored." Matthew 9:27-30
In the world's eyes, your marriage is dead. Many may laugh at you when you proclaim, "It is not dead but asleep!" Ask Jesus to touch your broken marriage. Ask Him to heal broken hearts.
If you believe that God is able to heal your marriage, He will do it!
"Take heart, your faith has healed you." Matthew 9:22
"According to your faith will it be done to you." Matthew 9:29
Can you not see the importance of faith in the healing of your home? You have a great opportunity to bless your family through your faith. Believe and you will receive!
"Many a man claims to have unfailing love, but a faithful man who can find? The righteous man leads a blameless life; blessed are his children after him." Proverbs 20:6-7
As we enter the Advent season, it is a time of expectant waiting for the coming of the Christ Child. It is a time of hope and joy; it is a time of faith. Look to the Christ Child with joyful hope. May the Lord find you a faithful man, standing for the healing of your marriage!
God bless you, O faith man of God.
Dennis L. Wingfield
Rejoice Marriage Ministries
thanks for the reminder that I have a fresh email to collect from
Rejoice M M
well, another roadblock in my band.
the drummer, the one who's been compiling this for the most part for me, has now had complications of somesort that he can't talk about and has backed out for now. I'm really dumbfounded as he never acted like that would happen. But I was told by the other guy that he had a fight with his wife about something, which he thought was financial.
However, the other guy wants to still work with me, says I have a lot of talent. I don't know what to do. I told him I needed to pray about it. It's just made me more leary about putting my music out there. I need to get it copywrited. does anyone know how to do that?
He is a christian, but he also wants to put my song in a B-horror movie that he is doing soundtrack for. Supposedly there is only music in the beginning and end of the movie, but I hate horror, and don't know that I would want it associated with it. He feels that God can use our stuff to reach other people, and as long as we're not promoting it, then it's okay. I understand his viewpoint, but I'm not sure that is what God wants.
I really don't know WHAT God is wanting me to do. I know that I cannot let my talent just sit here as it has been for 10 years. But whenever things start seeming to come to pass, something happens and it gets messed up. Maybe I am not persistent enough. Going thru the sitch almost seemed easier in the fact that I KNEW what God wanted of me, and it's the only time I really felt God was speaking to me loud and clear.
I wish I had a prophet. haha. well, I can say that I started writing another song due to this. I also know that this guy is also very talented and has more connections. He has a friend in another state with his own recording studio that they email back and forth and create stuff. He's been in a successful local band before, and he also wants to NOT play live (which I wasn't very excited to do anyways) and to do what evanescence did which is write all the music, then get the rest of the band, then record and promote like crazy. supposedly he said they had their cd out before ever playing live.
sooooooooo, back to praying
gee ... I am glad to hear that you are heading "back to praying" after you updated and visisted selected VIP's threads. (Question to self ...I wonder what I have got to do to make the VIP list). Guess I am not vocal enough on my liking of the Steelers or something. Ya skipped over any mention of my post/reply above. Let's see ..how much further should I push this to induce guilt ......LMAO.
Truth be told, I think you have yet to pay a visit to my thread which was once new in .....Piecing ..of all places, right in your own backyard 'hamlet' here. How much more convenient do I have to make myself for ya. ...There, that should about do it. The trip wire of guilt has been set and if you fail to trigger it and fall into all the guilt that has been laid down before you (in comical style) then I will arrive at what I have always suspected and that is that my darling has the market cornered and monopolized on just about every nook and cranny of guilt that is supposed to be spread throughout the world over. That has always been her unfortunate forte (surely unfortunate from my standpoint of having to deal with it (or try to)and interact with it) But that is part of what love is really all about I am finding out, isn't it? ---> (eeewwwwwhhh ..a potential Q for you to come back with a reply on ...another round of guilt being worked up ...eeeewwwwwwhhh)
Anywayze ..I will be nice and pay attention to your update and respond. Cuz that is just my way ......LOL! I will be stepping up my prayers for you so that the Lord might be able to reach you on a clearer level to know what He would wish of you in terms of your music and band project pursuits.
There I did as a caring friend ought to and gave you some feedback and prayers ...now get your butt over to my thread. As I said before, I aint exactly off in Jabip or something..only right 'next door' to ya. Get cracking Sis! LMAO
oooooOOOhh I can be sooo dramatic when I need to for effect.
Could be half my battle and what has led me to be in DB land. Cuz w/ me and my dramatic digressions and my darling who ..lets just say who knows how to work a crowd in a stage like theactrical fashion, it could be that were overacting a bit. I think I may be on to something. Actually it is not a new light bulb that just came on ...one that I have long suspected has some contributory potential
You got me on a roll this AM. I am becoming more dangerous by the sec.
OK... then the floor is your's once more and so sachee over to my thread and as they say (appropriately enuf in your case) "Step up to the mic" ..girl ..and get singin. lol
T you are quite comical.
actually, since you don't post on your thread consistently, it gets lost in my list! So there! The way I go to peoples threads is not like everyone else. I click on my name and then click on previous posts, that way I only see who I post to and keep everyone together. It's easier for me that way, or well, the only way I've done it. But sometimes, for some retarded reason, it will only let me do so many searches, so if you start a new thread, I may not be able to pull it up. Which I actually did try to several days ago, but it wouldn't let me. Soooo, I will try again!
Crissy--
DO Like I do--put them in "Watched topics". Then you can go to the ones that you are following right off the bat by pulling up your watch list.
I need to talk to you, when you get a chance. If I do not hear from you in the next couple of days, I will give you a call. DH is doing something odd and I need your perspective.
SMW
doing something odd hmmmm. are you talking bout the emails? I've posted you on that.
ya, I have used the watched topics too. I should do that.
ok s4 is pu.lling me aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
T you are quite comical.
yeah, I know. Without that, life would be pretty bland. I have always been the comic crack up in my family. The one to lighten the mood and keep everybody from being wound to tight.
actually, since you don't post on your thread consistently, it gets lost in my list! So there! The way I go to peoples threads is not like everyone else.
Sure seems like you are 'passing the buck'. Sorta trying to blame me for why you haven't been comin' around, lol.
Your not like everyone else, alright. A real one of a kind. ha ha
I am sure you are a very special and dedicated mommy and W. As much as I would like you to visit more on mine, I do not lose sight of how much you are trying to juggle.
But come around more anyway. I am selfish. I could always use your perspective on things. Challenge me some when you are able. It is the only way I stand a chance of developing myself into a better me. It surely takes others to help in that process.
Thanks in advance for showing up for more visits. LOL
Have a blessed w/e. talk to ya soon.
your fun T. selfish, yes. hahah, I'm just kididing. more like demanding.
I think I can visualize my oldest being you when he's your age. He's a very dramatic and "needy" child. haha Actually, I've read that children who are needy, you know the ones that need a lot of attention and recognition, end up being very creative like being musicians or artists, or actors or whatever. So, I liked reading that, made me feel like my child will accomplish something great later on!
I appreciate you using my advice. I don't always have the answers, or the best ones, but hopefully I can always shed some light. And God will use me appropriately!
have a good weekend!
It has been a rough and not too great w/e. But thanks ...looking for the silver lining.
Just feel like a quarantined animal. Guess I am a rabid tomato or one with some kind of microbiotic disease or somethin'.
I was kind of rabid yesterday. I think I might have been foaming at the mouth. I was overcome with an unhealthy rage. Not liking myself or anything in the world. So I went totally numb and flopped in my chair and through in my RUSH concert DVD and cranked it up to eardrum rattling levels.
Some of the 'derailment' has been undone as I did brush the devil off of me just enough to begrudgingly get to church today. I do not appreciate at all why my Lord is having me in this solitary life right now. If I had wanted this, I would not have chosen to marry my beautiful W. It makes no earthly sense. I just want her on my arm
I have been watching and kinda rooting for your Steelers today. Going to bed now though long before its conclusion.
Much love and prayers for peace and prosperity through Christ our Lord in whom all things are possible.
But when will they occur?
they will T. I'm really sorry. I know things are hard.
Galations 12:9-
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Philippians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.
just wrote another song...still missing lines though...
I keep gettin broken
my strength slowly slippin away
I keep gettin broken
tired of this game I play
I keep gettin broken
Don't want things to just stay the same
..................
I keep gettin broken
each time I climb to the top
I keep gettin broken
failures have yet to stop
I keep gettin broken
Can't help but to feel this way
OH-OH, _____5 syllables______
I just keep on fallin to my knees and then I pray
Lo-rd, keep me from this pain
Keep me from the wreckage that is pullin me away
Oh ________7-9 syllables____
________7-9_______________________
I'm broken....broken... God I beg you please deliver me
Cause my life leaves me...leaves me broken.
copyright by Crissy Seamster
somebody has the creative flow going for them
I will pray that it continues and that the blanks will be filled in beautifully.
You're special
T
"And His kingdom shall have no end ..."
thanks T. I told my s4 that I was talking to Tomato, and he said, "WHAT?!" he thought that was really funny.
your special too Tomato.
well, using this place to vent.
my H just bought a ps3. ug. I mean it's cool, and he bought it used, but they are still expensive, and we've spent lots$ on xmas already. He always seems to buy things for himself around xmas time. granted it's suppose to be for all of us, and the kids would sure like it, but we live above our means so much, and perhaps he doesn't realize how much.
I need to make a budget. I keep trying to do that, and I have, but there's so much going on in our finances it's hard to keep up. Plus the fact that neither of us pay for everything...he pays for somethings and I pay for somethings, and we both use creditcards so you know what happens with that.
okay, I think that God cannot bless us financially until we fix this. This is hard. Especially when your spouse, the leader of the house is not a believer.
I need to pray more over this too. I'm so bad when it comes to really praying. being a stay-at-home mom, you just pray if you get a chance between dealing with the house and kids, although, I should try to pray constantly, I am just so forgetful and I get distracted so easily.
okay, enough excuses!
I'll be leaving in a couple days for Wichita, so if I don't get on here much, Merry Christmas to all my friends!!!
Merry Christmas back to you and the family!
I am blessed with having you as my friend.
T
thank you T I am also blessed to know you.
Hi Crissy ..just thinking about you. Pretty scary with big Ben yesterday. Didn't hear anything about him today. Hope he is recovering nicely.
T
Crissy - I just found you... I'm going to put you on my watch list.... I don't have time to search for everyone anymore
How are you doing? How was Christmas? I will need to read back and catch up on your thread...
I'm sure I'll need your wise words soon... always something .. but I'm not as desperate anymore... I feel I've turned it over to God now ... feels good
stay in touch.
Turning it over to Him is as good as it gets.
And it is pretty much the biggest step in a person's life.
T
hey thanks so much for finding me Txmommy!!!
I lose people easily... and speaking of, Tomato, I've lost yours again, I think the DB site doesn't like Mozilla, because I can't do a search again. It does that sometimes. I'll try to find it again tomorrow.
still in Kansas, so it's been busy seeing everyone.
hope everyone is enjoying their vacations and holidays!
I LOVE ALL OF YOU!!!!
T... if you ever need to get me,
http://www.mymonavie.com/crissy
are you gonna stop by mine ???
alright ..if you are gonna play hard to get
hey T,
did ya see I was having problem finding yours again.
I really think it's the browser, unless it's the website, but I will try to look up your thread and it tells me you cannot make another search, try later. so, I have to wait and then by that time, it's already the next day.
I guess I could try to look it up the other way, but I'm not sure where you are at in the forums, so it'd probably take me even longer.
I'll check my email and see if you caught me that way. sorry.
I've not visited here prpeorly for the last 4 months or so but please know I am still STANDING for my marriage to be restored
ST, you're an inspiration AND and encouragement to MANY people here, thank & BLESS you
A message I received today:
Hello everyone!
Happy New Year!! May 2009 be a year full of marriages restored, and spouses coming home and God's will being accomplished!
We start this New Year's Day with a note from Ronnie in Louisiana. Even though he wrote it to my yesterday, on New Year's Eve, it still is relevant today!
Here's Ronnie:
During the holidays people tend to get and send out many greeting cards. If you go to any greeting card store you realize that the card industry has printed cards for every topic and occasion you can think of. There are cards for Christmas, New Years, Birthday, Get well I even saw one congratulating someone on the results of their new plastic surgery.
Well with the card industry trying to make money with every topic I found it kind of strange that not even Hallmark has a card celebrating divorce, adultery, or walking our on your family. Now if the money hungry greeting card industry doesn't even want to mention these topics can you imagine how God looks at it?
Think about it. There are no, "congratulations for abandoning your spouse and children" cards. There are no, "you are a great person to have fun with in secret but not good enough to be seen in public" cards.
No "Happy anniversary for the day I first cheated on my spouse and started living in sin and shame" cards.
Most of the greeting cards celebrate the family. The Spouse. The Mothers and Fathers. The Children. The anniversary of your wedding. It's kind of refreshing to know that in a money hungry, extreme liberal, "any topic for money" industry like greeting cards, that even they respect the sanctity of marriage and family.
Now even though today's message was meant to be light hearted, the praying for the restoration of our marriages and families is not light hearted. God has called us to stand for the sanctity of what He put together, for the salvation of our spouses, and to trust in Him for our every need.
Today is the last day of 2008. Let's remember to use this day to praise our Lord for all the blessings we received this past year regardless of the hardships. Let's remember that just because we didn't receive the specific blessings we prayed for doesn't mean we have been denied those blessings.
2009 is upon us. Let's start the year off strong believing that our miracles are still coming from the Lord and our spouses are on the way home.
Stand. Fight. Pray.
Oh by the way, 2008 is still here for another day. Lets all pray in agreement on this last day for our spouses salvation and restoration of our marriages. You never know, 2008 may just go out with a miracle.
Ronnie
I also want to share with you the daily devotion I read last night from the Our Journey Devotional from Walk in the Word. I'm sure it will bless you as it blessed me!
Here it is:
Wednesday, December 31st
You're Not Forgotten
Luke 1:6-10 (ESV):
And they [Elizabeth and Zechariah] were both righteous before God, walking blamelessly in all the commandments and statutes of the Lord. But they had no child, because Elizabeth was barren, and both were advanced in years.
Now while he was serving as priest before God when his division was on duty, according to the custom of the priesthood, he was chosen by lot to enter the temple of the Lord and burn incense. And the whole multitude of the people were praying outside at the hour of incense.
Life was just unfair for Zechariah and Elizabeth. They were good people - but childless. They should have been at the front of the line for collecting God's blessing, but they lived their entire lives hoping for, yet never conceiving, a child. They were godly, but with empty arms. And now they were old.
You can't help but think they felt forgotten. There they were living righteous lives, praying about one thing, and God seemed to have overlooked them. Do You even see us over here, Lord? How many times they must have examined their hearts, making sure there was no sin or pride blocking their prayers. Then, having done all, they entrusted their lives to a sovereign God who it seemed simply said no to their request.
Perhaps you can identify with this faithful couple. Have you prayed about something for years and God has been silent to your request? Do you feel overlooked and forgotten in the private places of your heart?
That's how Zechariah must have felt stepping into the Holy of Holies that day in Luke 1:8-13. His day to serve in the Holy of Holies (an opportunity of a lifetime!) had come, but he was in for a huge surprise. Imagine this shocker when he walked in that holy place:
And there appeared to him an angel of the Lord standing on the right side of the altar of incense. And Zechariah was troubled when he saw him, and fear fell upon him. But the angel said to him, "Do not be afraid, Zechariah, for your prayer has been heard, and your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you shall call his name John. (vv. 11-13, emphasis added)
God dispatched an angel to tell Zechariah personally that his prayer had been heard. You are not forgotten, Zechariah.
This same God who delivered a miracle baby to that shriveled old couple is the same God who hears your prayer today. He is a God of comfort, His faithfulness is personal; He knows what causes your heart to ache. Yes, God works His will, but He never forgets you! And when God acts, hurdles like age or circumstances are just not a factor! The angel promised "joy and gladness" (v.14) for this couple. It's what is ahead for you, too, as you wait on the Lord.
- James MacDonald
walkintheword.com
Journal:
What parts of the Christmas season tend to stir up feelings of being forgotten? How will I handle those feelings this year?
Use Psalm 16:11 as your daily prayer this week. Seek His presence and the feelings will take care of themselves.
Lord Jesus, this season I won't let my feelings have the last word, but I’ll let them point me to You as the One who can fill me with joy! Amen.
That's all for today - be blessed and be a blessing! Happy New Year!!!
Love & hugs,
Ruth Anne
Hope For Hurting Marriages Ministry
The LORD your God in your midst,
The Mighty One, will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.
~ Zephaniah 3:17 (NKJV)
CM, yes it has been a while since you've been on. how do you do?
Hope your new year was a good one. thank you for all your messages you send.
not much to share. had a decent time last night, and H finally went out with me with MY friends, it's been like 2 or 3 years since that's happened. It's usually always about his friends, always has been, but my friends don't drink like his do. anyways, we're at the restaurant with everyone and H says, your the volunteered designated driver. That really ticked me off. Sure, maybe I'm not a lush like everyone else, but I still like to drink occassionally. So I ordered a margarita right then. I was wanting to order it anyways, and had decided not too, until he told me that. I'm not sure how I woulda felt if he woulda asked me instead. I know I've had to do it many times for him, and he's done it maybe once or twice for me.
So, we get to his friends' house, 3 couples including us, and they're all like, talking about me being the driver and I said, ya, I just found out. so, for the first hour i was a little bitter, then decided to drink a couple frozen margaritas at the party (hardly any alchohol so no problems driving a couple hours later) and got over it...except my first drink got spilled all over me by my good friend who was already drunk, but she got me another one. I kinda felt like crying when that happened, but I let it go.
So, the night was fun, I finally got to see my H breakdance for the first time out of the 12 years I've known him. That was something that always bothered me, and I always told him I wanted to see him, but he'd always do it (well, the two times I know of) when I wasn't around. for some reason that always hurt my feelings.. like at our wedding, he did it and everyone ooh'd and aah'd except me cause I was in the bathroom.
Sooo, I was excited about that, even got a little bit on tape, but I started to think, oh, maybe he's kinda shy about it with me, like I don't like singing in front of him.
then, we head for somewhere else and I got caught up in drama, so I didn't get to party with the rest of the group. it's a long story, but one of the girls was really upset about being there, so I was trying to console her.
overall, it was a good night, cept we were out till 5am!
-------------
on my band, the drummer decided to back out for sure. which maybe is what God's intention is. I'm still somewhat hesitant to work with the other guy, as he has a very strong personality, but he seems very talented. and maybe this is the direction God is wanting me to go all along. IDK.
-----------------
I've also decided I'm starting to feel bitter again. I'm not sure what it is, but I know I need to get that R with Christ again. When I was in the middle of my sitch, of course I was so focused on Christ, it was all I could do to keep going, but now, it's so darn easy for me to just step back and take control of things my way. That is something I need to change this year. I need to just make a schedule for myself, for prayer, for bible time, for helping my kids grow in Christ. That is something I haven't been focused on enough of.
Oh, I do hope God has plans for my H to come to know the lord soon. I really need a Godly leader in my house.
Hi miss crissy
Your prayer request just went in the hopper. The more the merrier for me.
Peace from Christ through me to you..ha ha!
T
haha, your cute thanks for the prayers!
ok. note to self.
whenever I'm on the phone, which really isn't THAT much...I have friends that are on it all day...my H really shows annoyance.
I need to talk to him somehow about it. He acts mad while I'm on it, then acts like it never happened later, so it's hard to bring it up.
Like, yesterday, I'm talking to Laura, and CJ is all upset because I said no to something, because H told him to ask me. This is while I'm making supper too, and H is watching football. I can hear him in the house saying who the heck is she talking to anyways like he's annoyed. I'm thinking, okay, what's the big deal.
so there are little things that are starting to bother me with him, and things he's getting bothered about me. it also doesn't help that he gets SO frustrated with the kids. They are always arguing.
hmmmmmmmm. I need to figure this all out.
we've at least ML 3 times this last week though, so that's good.
ok, said to H while in bed, "I have a question, how come you get mad when I'm on the phone" and he was like, whatdya mean. he remember about when I was talking to Laura, but not when I was talking on the phone in Wichita, when he slammed the door after asking who I was talking to. It just happened to be BG.
so, now I'm wondering if maybe it's because it is DB people I'm talking to. So, now that I've mentioned it, maybe he'll be more conscious of what he's been doing. who knows.
I swear, never thought I'd have problems with a guy wanting my attention, if that's what he's wanting.
meaning, I figured I'd always have a guy that wasn't needing my attention.
except, sometimes he does the opposite, like if he goes to a friends house to watch the game, friends that I know too, but he doesn't invite me. but, maybe that's because he's got the friends and doesn't need me.
oh why am I trying to figure this out. I'm retarded.
BG, I wish that you were on here. I hope that you are just making yourself busy.
Hi crissy
thx for the insight ...for "my friend"
I responded.
Don't struggle girl. You and Jesus will get it right!!
Love ya
T
Hi crissy
thx for the insight ...for "my friend"
I responded.
Don't struggle girl. You and Jesus will get it right!!
Love ya
T
thanks T!
Journal.
Well guess what my H has said. He is planning on quiting at beginning of Feb! I'm scared and happy and sad all at once.
He went back to work today after vaca and just is done. He's tired of the little pay and just everything. I am very proud of him for making plans to take a risk. wish it was with me and the monavie, but that's okay, at least he's planning this. He's always been, since he started working after we got prego, the type of person to just be comfortable and never take a risk. This job he's had for 11-12 years now.
So, the plan is, to use 2 weeks vaca in a month and go to KS to stay with his mom or friend to learn pulling dents. his friend of 20 years has had his own biz for 12 and the guy makes in one day what James does in a week. and that's when he's not even doing anything and spending money too! The only scary thing, is there's no benefits, so no health ins (not that we need the doc, we never need to go anymore) and he'll have to train w/o pay for possibly almost 2 months. Which we could do, but it's still scary.
the other scary thing is, that his friend may be gone for a week, or may be gone for a whole month at a time. They travel to the hail sites, which they even went to Germany for 2 months last year. So, I said, is that a good thing for our family? I really don't want what happened to years ago to happen again. He said that he felt we were passed that and that no, it's not the best for the family, but thought we know better now. and the fact that we will never get out of our debt unless we file for BK, or something drastic happens, like this.
So, I definitely need to leave this one up to God.
He did mention, how he's kinda sick that he never went to his friend for a job before (didn't want to be like everyone else asking for a job), and that things would be way different, but then he'd probably be single and wouldn't have met me and had all this. so that was nice. as long as he wasn't being sarcastic! lol and if you've been at our house in the last week, you would think he WAS being sarcastic! 2day was much better though, not much yelling or fighting between us all.
anyways, that was way long, I'll keep ya'all posted on the job though! I'll definitely have more time to check up on everyone if he's gone for weeks at a time!!!
what do you all think about that? I'm also scared for the influence. his friend is not a strong christian, doesn't go to church and not sure if he has a belief, just know his wife was catholic and he went sometimes. And all the guys that work together in the company can really hold their own when it comes to drinking, which they do a lot I think. my H, cannot, and I don't think he would fall into that very easily, but you just never know. So, although I love the fact that he is wanting to make a big step (finally after all these years) I'm still scared of the impact to our family it will have. or maybe it will make him love the home more? maybe I can make changes with the house, or with the kids easier if he's not here. oh IDK. a dad should always be present.
this makes me sad. I'm really not a needy person, and we were apart the first 4 years of our R, and it really didn't bother me as much as it would all my GFs who would die if their H would leave for a week. But also, my H's supposed top 5LL is quality time. how can we have quality time if he's not here, and he doesn't really like to talk much.
definitely don't read all that in one sitting!!!!
thanks friends for any input.
Crissy dear
the only part of this that might concern me a little bit is just how fast he is moving on this major change and whether or not you saw any of this coming. Did he communicate the idea that he might be getting ready to bail on his job that he has been at for so very long.
All i can say is that make sure your feelings are known on what is transpiring... try to find the brake pedal a little bit if you feel it is necessary for you to digest this. You two have to be moving along together as one unit and the "one flesh" tandem with God. I hope he was considerate enough to bring the idea to you and present it to you for your input and your feelings and not just tell you "I will be doing this". If the consideration was in fact given to you ..it seemed you did not mention it or allude to it in what you posted, unless I missed it.
Peace and prayers a plenty for you and your's my dear.
T
no, he usually doesn't ask me if it's something he really wants to do. It's not often it happens, and I do feel that God has put him in charge of the family, and that he is suppose to be the leader of the house, so I'm not bothered by it. Usually he knows my opinions on things, like if he were to have said, hey we're going to move back to Wichita next month... ya, I'd have a problem. And granted, I would have like him to ask my opinion, but he is the one working the job, and I have been dying for him to take a risk for years.
and in regards to him wanting to quit. that's been for the last 3 years. see how long it takes him to do something?!? his friend actually offered him to try about 5-8 years ago I think, but you know what? if he had done it then too, we wouldn't be together, I'm almost positive. our M wasn't strong enough, hadn't gone thru enough trials to stand up to being away that much. probably.
I did tell him that I was excited and scared and sad. glad that he was taking a risk and that he deserved so much more than what pepsi gave him, and I didn't want him in something that he hated, scared about the ins part, sad because he'd be gone more from the family, scared about what it could do to us being apart, and my thoughts on moving...that he dragged me down here and if he would have asked me 2 years ago to move back, I woulda said yes in a heart beat, but now things are different and I don't want to move.
So, he says he hasn't thought about the moving thing... although I'm sure he has, and I'm positive he wants to move back. But that's really not fair, IMHO. I moved for him, then his mom moves back to wichita and we're here alone for 6 years and I finally make a life for myself and then he wants to move back. I know he's suppose to lead our family, but I mean, is that really fair?
And actually, he really doesn't have to move to KS to do the job. He just needs to be there for a couple months to train. The job requires them to travel everywhere, so it really doesn't matter where he lives. I understand the desire to be with friends and have our kids grow up with their kids, but we're only 3 hours away, it's not like an all day drive.
anyways, I just really don't wanna move now darnit.
even though my band thing kinda collapsed, but I'm still working with one of them thru email and we're going to try to write songs together, which I've never done, but I am letting God guide me and hopefully I'm following the right path.
I also wish it was something we could both pray together on. but I can't expect that, and I will just have to pray myself. Maybe someday he will have the desire to be led by Christ.
oh ..don't I know the feeling!
It is all according to His plan though. His plans are as great as they come. We are a questioning sort ..though we ought not be!
Bring glory to His name with your day and your conduct in it.
T
You are piecing, you don't get pictures! LOL
SMW
You are piecing, you don't get pictures! LOL
SMW
Guess that was an inside chuckle sorta thing for you two ?!
Are you referring to pics from estro-fest??
you guys and your phone kabbitzing i imagine that dribbles over onto here.
T
Nah---was talking about the link I put on Amy, Tawnya, BG, GF, et. al. threads.
SMW
oh the hot guy stuff
darn cell phone cams ..I never know when they are taking my pic and plastering it all over the web like that LMAO
T
hahaha T,
and hey, I bet your better lookin than all those sleeping guys.
but I'll take my own man any day.
as long as he doesn't shave off his goatee. otherwise, the deals off. lol
hahaha T,
and hey, I bet your better lookin than all those sleeping guys.
awww thx ST
T
haven't posted in a while. ben pretty busy.
However, lately H has been more curious about this site. I think he still thinks something is going on more than it is. He hovers over me and wants to look at some of the threads, so I show him a couple. I'm not sure what he thinks, but I know last year he mentioned about guys on here looking to pick up girls. if he only knew the guys on here.
ya T, are you trying to pick up women on here!?!?
oh, and last night he gave me a back rub AFTER we ML. is that crazy??? I do think that he may have felt bad though, because he was watching tv in the bedroom, half asleep I might add, and I was in the living room playing my keyboard...I thought quiet enough...but he comes in halfway thru my song and says something about why didn't I close the door, my keyboard is louder than the tv and he can't hear it. well, I'm playing a song I just wrote, so that really didn't make me feel good so I sat there a sec and decided I didn't want to continue so I got on here. He said, I didn't mean for you to quit. So I think perhaps he felt bad about that, IDK. I think that may be the first or one of the first times he's ever massaged my back without me asking. that NEVER happens. I said, wow, what did I do to get this, and he said, oh i don't know. and I said, well I want to make sure I do it again!
Are you still up??? I need you!!!!
SMW
ya T, are you trying to pick up women on here!?!?
lol ..Not consciously, but with me and my allure and amazing personality, I am pretty hard to resist LOL
T
Ps -- Your H is not so crazy to be protective of his lovely W.
he sounds like a smart guy to me
glad to hear of your recent pampering ..cool
T
Hey I found your thread!!!! Going to catch up. Glad you are doing well. Thanks for all your help.
geez ..this is kind of a ghost town of a thread over here.
give us an update every blue moon would ya.
how's your singing voice and the keyboard fingers and the composer's hand doin?
how is james?
give us somethin already ..geez.
or else you will be re-relegated to the scrap heap of pg 3 news again.
Hope you are doing extremely well and are feeding off of the Lord and His greatness.
Peace and prayers I offer to you and the family.
T
ooops... I've been so caught up in posting to everyone else, that I've forgotten about my own thread!
nothing really going on except I'm really busy! I have 4 jobs right now, so it's been crazy, plus James has been out of town 2 weeks trying out the dent pulling job he might do. I'm pretty sure he will quit pepsi and do it, which means, he'll be back tomorrow, then work for pepsi another 3 weeks maybe and then be done and go back to Wichita with his friend to train for 2 months. ya, crazy. I've interestingly been totally okay since he's been gone. I haven't missed him really, nor been scared at night, or anything, but I think it's because I'm so busy and I don't have time to think about it. I mean I miss him, but it's not like I'm dying or anything. must mean I have a life now!
and Tomato, you are definitely quite a catch.
Your wife is very lucky. your DW, not DH. silly me.
SMW, I hope you called me that night. I'm usually oblivious when posting, I'm very concentrated on each thread so I usually never notice who's actually on when I am. But I just read your thread and it sounds like good things happening and I'm so happy for you! You still have a long ways to go, but it's all moving in God's direction. YEAH!!!!
SO2, I'm so glad to see you! and I'm so sorry it took me a week!! oops! I still have hope in your M. I know it's really messed up, but you have to know that God has a plan for you, and just have faith that he will pull you thru this and there IS a wonderful life ahead of you.
as far as my music... musicians are weird. the guy I'm workin with was kinda upset that I made my own music myspace page. It seemed to him that I was just wanting to be on my own and using him to get where I want to go. However, he has his own music page that he's had for a while, and posted one of my songs on it, that he did add a lot to btw, but he also posted that I came up with the chord progressions. which made me feel like he was taking more credit, because I wrote the song, the words, the melody, and he took it and added guitar drums bass, and changed my keyboard sound to an organ sound. anyways, I'm not one to complain to people, instead I put a comment that said, "hey, I wrote the words too, I like my words
"
well, if you guys like, you can go here and listen to the Whisper song that he messed with. It's totally a demo, so the vocal track is not right on with the rest, and I'm not so sure I like the major hard sound with the rest of the instruments. But let me know what ya'all think. It's suppose to be alternative rock, so beware.
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=76270637
well, I just had a conviction today. I was picking up s4 from the drop off daycare, and I just had an overwhelming feeling that I'm not doing the right thing. I had taken on another job, working on commission only, and it basically had me scheduling sporatic meetings thru the week, and so I was running s4 here and there to work them in. I feel bad, because they are such nice people, but it was the most recent thing I added in my life, and it is the one that I wasn't getting paid on. So, I am relieved.
I also missed a thing for s10 this morning he told me about the other day, but I didn't schedule it in, so I forgot and he was disappointed. He had a 4 line speech to give. I told him I really wanted to go and just totally forgot and I was sorry. He was okay and forgave me.
bad mother I am being! at least I know that I need to devote more time to them, now I need to act on it.
plus, my h is coming home tonight...or he was suppose to...
now he's coming back in the morning. which is okay. this is the wrong time of month for him to come back, sooooo TMI!
..... this is the wrong time of month for him to come back, sooooo TMI!
You're funny, ST!!
[[[[[[hugs]]]]]]