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scooby Offline OP
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My h has been going thru mlc. The crazy stuff he has done clearly point to mlc with some mental instability. H retained a lawyer, so I filed on him and he should be served any day now.

We have 2 kids and are community property state. Any advice would be great!!

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kml Offline
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Hi Scooby - welcome to our little corner of the board!

As to practical stuff, make copies of all financial records, tax returns, retirement accounts etc. Put them in a safe place, not in the house.

Usually in a divorce H will be required to continue your insurance until the divorce is final. Then you can COBRA the coverage for 36 mos if you want.

Start figuring out what you want to do with the house. Do you want it? Will he? How much equity is in it?

Your attorney can give you a rough idea of what's reasonable to expect financially.

Also keep documentation of any weird intersctions with H, in case things escalate to the point of needing a restraining order or something.

It's gonna be ok. Really. On the other side of this storm, the sun is gonna shine.

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I also recommend if your H has the better health insurance coverage, ask him to cover the kids down the road. Keep in mind that it plays into the support formula, but is well worth it if your kids get the best coverage they can.

Ellie is right - there is definitely sunshine above the clouds.

Good luck!

Betsey


"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."

Albert Einstein
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scooby Offline OP
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Thanks. They tried to serve h last night, but he was out. I told them best to serve him at work, and he said he needs special permission for that. I said good luck finding him at home then. This whole thing is a nightmare.

I have tons of evidence on h. He is a mlcer and crazy to boot. He thinks I am stupid, so he leaves me plenty evidence. I have the financials locked and he cannot get into it without locksmith. I will start moving it out of the house though. With the serving the is a restraining order for financials.

H is ow and is lying saying we are just friends. He would be in trouble at work if found out. I have half a mind to hire pi and plaster pictures everywhere...lol. H is suing work over this. He thinks he is being harassed. I think he even believes his lies at this point.

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scooby Offline OP
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Thanks. They tried to serve h last night, but he was out. I told them best to serve him at work, and he said he needs special permission for that. I said good luck finding him at home then. This whole thing is a nightmare.

I have tons of evidence on h. He is a mlcer and crazy to boot. He thinks I am stupid, so he leaves me plenty evidence. I have the financials locked and he cannot get into it without locksmith. I will start moving it out of the house though. With the serving the is a restraining order for financials.

H is ow and is lying saying we are just friends. He would be in trouble at work if found out. I have half a mind to hire pi and plaster pictures everywhere...lol. H is suing work over this. He thinks he is being harassed. I think he even believes his lies at this point.

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scooby Offline OP
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Still waiting for him to be served. Ugh

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Worst case scenario at least its true in California if you can provide evidence that you attempted to serve him several times in court you can proceed without him. Although given the extra time and effort it takes to push through court processes I hope it doesn't get to that. Good luck!


Me: 27 H: 26
T:4 M: 2
B: 6/2013
Divorce Filed: 2/4/2014 (Our anniversary)
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kml Offline
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Can't you just serve him yourself? Have a friend with you when you do.

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scooby Offline OP
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I am thinking he was served and is being silent about it to piss me off. He is undiagnosed bipolar or personality disorder. He also has a psychology degree and tricked an IC for five sessions. I hope he effs up royally. I have kids and am worried about his craziness. It is more than mlc he is wacko. I have took notes on his UPS, downs, and anger. So now I know the moods. I talked to the cops and I can do nothing about the bullying and verbal abuse. Basically he has to hit me. We are living together and divorcing. Any suggestions? I need serious help. There is more to the story of awful craziness. Some that I can't write. I am also on Hs site. Need serious help.

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job Offline
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Scooby,
I would venture to say that he's been served, i.e., from your postings on another forum. Right now, he's remaining silent because he knows that if he does so, it will create a lot of anxiety and worry in you. Don't let him see you sweat!

I would suggest that if you are that concerned about your welfare that you and the kids go stay w/someone for the weekend. I'm sure you have friends that would be more than willing to have you stay w/them. There's nothing more we can suggest other than go somewhere else or have someone come there. He's not going to leave and he's going to make you miserable the entire weekend and I, for one, say that you need to think of your own safety now because it's too late if he should do you physical harm.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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