hello. I am so new to this mlc I think I am crazy. I got the speech in march and I asked him to move out one week later. The first 6 weeks were hell. We had decided to divorce but then withdrew due to not being sure what we want. Then for about 3 weeks we were getting along, being intimate, he takes the child every other weekend. And now we are back to him needing to find out who he is. I see no signs of another woman, have total access to everything. so do I just play it cool? He talks in riddles, talks about future together then changes his tune.
If you really think that he is having a MLC Read the resources at the top of the MLC board and post over there.
He is asking for SPACE, give it to him. Get out and GAL. DETACH. Believe none of what he say and half of what he does. Have NO EXPECTATIONS. Take care of yourself, breathe, eat, sleep, exercise.
You are on moderation right now on the forum. SO post in small frequent posts until you get off of it.
Dealing with a MLC is going to be tough. The MLC doesn't know what they want, so what they say will change often.
Quote:
32.Do not believe any of what you hear and less than 50% of what you see. Your spouse will speak in absolute negatives because he/she is hurting and scared.
The emotions of the MLC are going to be all over the board. It is important that you stay consistent and don't join in on the rollercoaster ride. It is something the MLC is going to have to go through on their own.
Be the lighthouse for them. No matter what they are feeling on a particular day, where you are will be unchanged. The MLC will never make it home if "home" is constantly moving.
Post often. It will get you off moderation quicker. Post when you just want to talk. I used to talk to my W throughout the day. I come here now when I need support and encouragement and it will work for you.
M-40 W-33 D3, D4, SD13 T 9 YEARS M 5 YEARS ILYBINILWY APRIL 2012
Thank you. I really find it hard not to react to him. When he pulls away, I tend to get very unhappy. How do you get to a place where it does not affect you? And i look into every thing he does. Like for the first time last night he did not answer my S10 phone call. So I immediately jump to conclusions!
