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#2537370 02/12/15 04:25 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
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Ontheup Offline OP
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374


Me:40 W:35
D:8
T:13 M:10
WAW: 7/14
PA Discovered: 1/15 at least 6 months
Moved out and moved on

Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
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Ontheup Offline OP
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
Hey
I have an appointment with Sol tomorrow.

Thanks all


Me:40 W:35
D:8
T:13 M:10
WAW: 7/14
PA Discovered: 1/15 at least 6 months
Moved out and moved on

Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
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Ontheup Offline OP
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
Hey Fade

No I wont be lying if anyone asks me why but the MB approach does seem a bit extreme. To me it just adds fuel to the fire. Everyone is going to find out at some point anyway. Both my parents already know, her work colleagues must have an idea and her family will no doubt be wondering. Why do I need to drop a bomb in there an hurt everyone. Im pretty sure my wife would hate me forever if I did that. As it stands I want to remain civil at the least as we have D8. As far as getting back together im not really sure I want to anyway. Think it is more my ego.


Me:40 W:35
D:8
T:13 M:10
WAW: 7/14
PA Discovered: 1/15 at least 6 months
Moved out and moved on

Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
O
Ontheup Offline OP
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OP Offline
Member
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
got home last night in a bit of an aloof mood. My wife took exception to this. Asking what was wrong with me and do I want her to come and watch D8 skating. Its almost laughable the sh!t that comes out of her mouth
Anyway we all went ice skating. Me and D8 skated wife just watched which is good for D8
We got home and wife said so are you going to ask me about my counselling session. Ahh so that's what's wrong with her. I Thought she had been but didn't say a word on purpose of course.
Anyway she then gets into a deep and meaningful about her counselling session. I did say at the start that I didn't want to know, is between her and counsellor. Anyway she proceeds to tell me about it (most) getting a bit upset whilst doing so. I validated what she was saying and we talked a bit about what was said. She has laid it all to the counsellor, her mum, our marriage and situation we are in. This morning back to fantasy land of OM.

Last edited by Ontheup; 02/13/15 10:51 AM.

Me:40 W:35
D:8
T:13 M:10
WAW: 7/14
PA Discovered: 1/15 at least 6 months
Moved out and moved on

Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
O
Ontheup Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
O
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
I read an excellent post today on surviving infidelity site in the wayward section by a user called etaoin. He had been in a long affair and he broke the whole thing down about how why when how it stopped everything. Very interesting. Hard to read though so be warned


Me:40 W:35
D:8
T:13 M:10
WAW: 7/14
PA Discovered: 1/15 at least 6 months
Moved out and moved on

Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
O
Ontheup Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
O
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
1 month down! Better than first 2 weeks. At least I'm eating. Hard this weekend with VD splashed everywhere and love songs all over the radio grrrr. Wife goes away on Sunday with d8 for a few nights which will make it more bearable.


Me:40 W:35
D:8
T:13 M:10
WAW: 7/14
PA Discovered: 1/15 at least 6 months
Moved out and moved on

Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 124
4
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Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 124
Isn't it sad Ontheup that when the W is gone it is almost easier? I get mad/upset whatever that W is gone half the night but frankly we don't have much to say anyway so why have to feel uncomfortable. I hope the ladies have fun but more importantly, I hope you take the time to enjoy some things for yourself. Hang in there


Me:39 W:33
Married 6/07
D6
Found out about affair 9/14
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
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Ontheup Offline OP
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
Hey 4

It is sad but I just cant take the BS anymore. I can barely look at her. She is constantly dangling the hope carrot out in front of me checking im still there for her. When she's not around at least I don't have to listen to the BS coming out of her mouth. It seems to have gotten worse over the last week or so as she falls deeper into her affair hole and count down to me leaving gets nearer. Rock bottom has to be somewhere. Crazy thing is i'm actually concerned for her mental state.
I managed to get a good deal on 2nd hand suite for my new place today so at least im progressing.
Hang in there buddy. Keep posting


Me:40 W:35
D:8
T:13 M:10
WAW: 7/14
PA Discovered: 1/15 at least 6 months
Moved out and moved on

Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
O
Ontheup Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
O
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 374
Struggling to buy a car. Have 4k to spend but every one I rang about had been sold straight away grrr. Need to sort one this week
Had my first session with councilor. Went well with some good incite. Very emotional though. Wished I could have stayed longer. Going again in 2 weeks,
Had tea at my mums so some company while wife and d8 are away. Roast turkey and spuds lovely
Wife has been texting again tonight with general chit chat. I've ignored for the most part except about d8. Spoke to d8 as well. She's having a great time.
On my own at home which is a bit better.


Me:40 W:35
D:8
T:13 M:10
WAW: 7/14
PA Discovered: 1/15 at least 6 months
Moved out and moved on

Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 124
4
Member
Offline
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4
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 124
Don't ever feel bad for needing to stay strong in IC...that is your place....like here to be you, say how you feel and learn advice and mechanisms to deal with your own issues. I felt like I wasted time my first IC when I was a mess, and then realized it was because I was glad or relieved I was there and could just talk about me without having to smile and validate W or whatever. Hang in the up


Me:39 W:33
Married 6/07
D6
Found out about affair 9/14
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